3 Ways Obedience Gives You Peace
It's no secret that many of us look forward to the Christmas season. We are happily putting up Christmas trees, singing Christmas carols, drinking hot chocolate and eggnog, buying presents, over eating and spending time with loved ones. And we willingly do all of these things to experience joy, fun and most of all—peace.
Unfortunately, none of those things can bless us with peace. Peace comes from Christ and peace is Christ. And we can only experience this peace by getting to know Christ intimately and obeying His will. Here are some ways being obedient to Christ can give us peace.
Drama…not over here
We avoid TONS of insane stress and endless problems when we embrace God's will. Following God's word can literally save us tons of energy (we exhaust too much time trying to "fix" areas of our lives that we've willingly broken).
Fire Hearing
We begin to hear God's voice more clearly the more we immerse ourselves in His will. And as a result, we slowly achieve wisdom.
Blessings follow
Blessings (big and small) start to flow through our lives like a rushing river of flawless angelic rain (and who doesn’t want that).
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Unfortunately, none of those things can bless us with peace. Peace comes from Christ and peace is Christ. And we can only experience this peace by getting to know Christ intimately and obeying His will. Here are some ways being obedient to Christ can give us peace.
Drama…not over here
We avoid TONS of insane stress and endless problems when we embrace God's will. Following God's word can literally save us tons of energy (we exhaust too much time trying to "fix" areas of our lives that we've willingly broken).
Fire Hearing
We begin to hear God's voice more clearly the more we immerse ourselves in His will. And as a result, we slowly achieve wisdom.
Blessings follow
Blessings (big and small) start to flow through our lives like a rushing river of flawless angelic rain (and who doesn’t want that).
Be sure to follow me on Instagram and Twitter.
3 Ways To Be A Rebel Like Christ
It's officially Christmas season. Many of us have already started gift shopping (mostly online due to COVID-19 of course) hoping to get the best deals possible. And while we are becoming consumed with all of the pomp and circumstance of the season, it is a must that we remember why this holiday exists in the first place.
We must remember Yeshua (Jesus) and why he came down to earth to save us. We must remember how he lived his life and how he was and is the most influential humble radical to walk this earth. Here are some things we can do to live more like Christ.
Education is a must
We must read AND study AND pray about the word of God. We cannot successfully stand for something and bring others to Christ if we know nothing about him. Yeshua was extremely well-versed. He studied, prayed and fasted all of the time.
24/7 boldness
Once we understand the word, we must unapologetically execute it through our lives no matter how unpopular it may be. We must be prepared to part ways with family members, friends, co-workers, etc from time to time. Yeshua never tried to be popular. His goal was righteousness.
Check your haters...sometimes
When we live a God-centered life, we will have haters. We must pray and let God speak through us with love, control and wisdom when it's necessary. We must also know when it's time to be silent. Yeshua had no problem correcting the Pharisees, Sadducees and anybody else who was wrong, but he also knew when to be silent. He knew sometimes it was better to walk it more than he talked it.
We must remember Yeshua (Jesus) and why he came down to earth to save us. We must remember how he lived his life and how he was and is the most influential humble radical to walk this earth. Here are some things we can do to live more like Christ.
Education is a must
We must read AND study AND pray about the word of God. We cannot successfully stand for something and bring others to Christ if we know nothing about him. Yeshua was extremely well-versed. He studied, prayed and fasted all of the time.
24/7 boldness
Once we understand the word, we must unapologetically execute it through our lives no matter how unpopular it may be. We must be prepared to part ways with family members, friends, co-workers, etc from time to time. Yeshua never tried to be popular. His goal was righteousness.
Check your haters...sometimes
When we live a God-centered life, we will have haters. We must pray and let God speak through us with love, control and wisdom when it's necessary. We must also know when it's time to be silent. Yeshua had no problem correcting the Pharisees, Sadducees and anybody else who was wrong, but he also knew when to be silent. He knew sometimes it was better to walk it more than he talked it.
3 Ways To Flourish During Stressful Times
It's no secret how crazy life can be. This year has taken all of us on an unexpected ride with a plethora of dips and dives that has forced us to face the ugliness society (including ourselves) possesses. The more we experience, the more our minds, bodies and spirits are forced to fight for tranquility. Here are three ways we can help ourselves to become our best during the "worst."
Let go
Trying to control everything and everyone will drive you insane. Learn how to pause, exhale and discern when it's time to release a difficult person or unchanging situation (your sanity will thank you).
What’s good?
Focus on the positive things in your life (no matter how "small"). Create a mental or tangible list of everything that's good (your health, friendships, job, relationship with God, favorite TV show, etc.) and thank God for blessing you with them.
Operation fabulous
Use this time to focus on becoming a better you mentally, physically and spiritually. Difficult times create a unique energy inside of us that can be nurtured to create positive or negative outcomes in our lives. Allow God to guide you in this moment of darkness so you can become the light. You won't be sorry.
Let go
Trying to control everything and everyone will drive you insane. Learn how to pause, exhale and discern when it's time to release a difficult person or unchanging situation (your sanity will thank you).
What’s good?
Focus on the positive things in your life (no matter how "small"). Create a mental or tangible list of everything that's good (your health, friendships, job, relationship with God, favorite TV show, etc.) and thank God for blessing you with them.
Operation fabulous
Use this time to focus on becoming a better you mentally, physically and spiritually. Difficult times create a unique energy inside of us that can be nurtured to create positive or negative outcomes in our lives. Allow God to guide you in this moment of darkness so you can become the light. You won't be sorry.
3 Reasons Your Self-Esteem Is Crippling Your Faith
Being a Christian is a lifelong journey that continuously challenges us to become better in every area of our lives by nurturing our relationship with Christ. The only way to successfully accomplish that is to have faith in Him and His desires for our lives. One of the reasons why we struggle so much with our faith is because we unknowingly allow our insecurities to swallow up our faith and replace it with potent weakness and complacency. Here are a few reasons why low self-esteem is crippling your faith.
Is that you God?
Sometimes your opinion of yourself is so low that it poisons any direction or anointing God gives you because you don't believe God would ever value you enough to want you to do or embody certain blessings. In order to hear God's voice clearly, you must exterminate your self-doubt with scriptures that reveal your value.
God is great, but am I?
You know God is speaking to you, but you doubt His authority in your life because you have zero confidence that you are capable of accomplishing the tasks He has planted into your spirit. In order to take action, you must drown your doubts with confidence that God's perfection is more than capable of smothering your fears with sheets of grace and mercy.
Worth it...maybe?
You know God is speaking to you and you know He is capable of doing and giving you everything you need. Unfortunately, your esteem is so unhealthy that you only know how to consume unhealthy criticism and notions about yourself. In order to be obedient to God, you must change your mental and spiritual diet and only consume His promises, direction and correction for your life.
Is that you God?
Sometimes your opinion of yourself is so low that it poisons any direction or anointing God gives you because you don't believe God would ever value you enough to want you to do or embody certain blessings. In order to hear God's voice clearly, you must exterminate your self-doubt with scriptures that reveal your value.
God is great, but am I?
You know God is speaking to you, but you doubt His authority in your life because you have zero confidence that you are capable of accomplishing the tasks He has planted into your spirit. In order to take action, you must drown your doubts with confidence that God's perfection is more than capable of smothering your fears with sheets of grace and mercy.
Worth it...maybe?
You know God is speaking to you and you know He is capable of doing and giving you everything you need. Unfortunately, your esteem is so unhealthy that you only know how to consume unhealthy criticism and notions about yourself. In order to be obedient to God, you must change your mental and spiritual diet and only consume His promises, direction and correction for your life.
4 Reasons Why 2020 Is Making You Bitter
It's no secret that this year has been filled with a number of global trials that have literally made us all freeze in place. We've all been forced to abandon valuable parts of our lifestyle (social events, family and friend relationships, jobs, homes, money, health, safety, respect, "racial harmony," etc.). And as a result, thousands of us are experiencing various forms of bitterness. Here are a few reasons why you may be bitter.
Shock and awe on steroids
You were taken by complete surprise. This year has taken your composure, thrown it into the fire of calamity and dared your peace to come out and play. The only REAL thing that can keep you strong and as positive as possible is focusing on God more than you focus on your problems (which takes A LOT of prayer, meditation and an open spirit to hear God's guidance).
Denial has nowhere to hide
You are so used to stuffing conflict and your problems into the closet of perpetual "I don't want to talk about it" that you don't know how to handle all of the immense trials that demand your attention by any means necessary. This season is forcing you to mentally mature and address all of the darkness in your world you say is light.
This is who you ALWAYS were
You have consistently been a Bitter Betty. It doesn't matter how many blessings God rains into the garden of your life, you still manage to find a tiny weed. Even if COVID-19, racial tension and political unrest weren't happening, your face would still look like you've been sucking on a lemon on a sunny day.
Life is hard
No matter how tough you are and how positive you try to handle things, too many treacherous waves of unforgiving drama bashing you in the head will take a toll on your psyche. Your strong relationship with God is the ONLY thing that can grab you by the hand and rescue you from drowning under the pressures of this unapologetic season.
Shock and awe on steroids
You were taken by complete surprise. This year has taken your composure, thrown it into the fire of calamity and dared your peace to come out and play. The only REAL thing that can keep you strong and as positive as possible is focusing on God more than you focus on your problems (which takes A LOT of prayer, meditation and an open spirit to hear God's guidance).
Denial has nowhere to hide
You are so used to stuffing conflict and your problems into the closet of perpetual "I don't want to talk about it" that you don't know how to handle all of the immense trials that demand your attention by any means necessary. This season is forcing you to mentally mature and address all of the darkness in your world you say is light.
This is who you ALWAYS were
You have consistently been a Bitter Betty. It doesn't matter how many blessings God rains into the garden of your life, you still manage to find a tiny weed. Even if COVID-19, racial tension and political unrest weren't happening, your face would still look like you've been sucking on a lemon on a sunny day.
Life is hard
No matter how tough you are and how positive you try to handle things, too many treacherous waves of unforgiving drama bashing you in the head will take a toll on your psyche. Your strong relationship with God is the ONLY thing that can grab you by the hand and rescue you from drowning under the pressures of this unapologetic season.
5 Reasons Christian Women Are Tempted To Compromise Their Virtue
Let's keep it real. Living a biblically virtuous (specifically being celibate until marriage) life can have its challenges. And these challenges don't always appear because being virtuous is so hard. They exist because this way of life totally contradicts societal ideologies.
The world does a fabulous job of sending us messages 24/7 on how to live a life that is completely contrary to God's way. And as a result, we embody tons of insecurities and conflicts that affect our choices. Here are a few reasons why we ladies struggle to remain virtuous.
Worthy? Maybe...
The spirit of low self-esteem is a major culprit why many women compromise their values and desires. They allow this spirit to whisper lies of inferiority, comparisons and worthlessness into their spiritual ears. And as a result, they pursue or allow inferior ideologies to consume their lives.
Table for one...again...
The feeling of loneliness can be so loud it can cause us to silence it with the company of a man we know is not on the same spiritual page as us. As a result, we end up in situations that injure our values.
Cultural pressure
Family, friends, church members and coworkers, etc. can make singleness seem like a curse and something we should eradicate from our lives as soon as possible. As a result, we throw our virtue to wind and watch it float away as we make "getting a man" our mission by any means necessary.
Tick tock goes the clock
The older we get, we begin paying closer attention to God's timeline for our lives. If it doesn't coincide with what we desire, we ladies begin focusing on our (or society's) time table of when we should be married and have children. And as a result, we force relationships we know don't and won't make us happy.
Temperature control
Sometimes we can drink in so much of our sexual desires that we become drunk and foggy with lust. This can cause us to blackout and fulfill our needs while ignoring the consequences. And as a result, that unwed fulfillment can leave us with hangovers of regret, more loneliness, emotional trauma, possible STDs and unwanted pregnancies.
The world does a fabulous job of sending us messages 24/7 on how to live a life that is completely contrary to God's way. And as a result, we embody tons of insecurities and conflicts that affect our choices. Here are a few reasons why we ladies struggle to remain virtuous.
Worthy? Maybe...
The spirit of low self-esteem is a major culprit why many women compromise their values and desires. They allow this spirit to whisper lies of inferiority, comparisons and worthlessness into their spiritual ears. And as a result, they pursue or allow inferior ideologies to consume their lives.
Table for one...again...
The feeling of loneliness can be so loud it can cause us to silence it with the company of a man we know is not on the same spiritual page as us. As a result, we end up in situations that injure our values.
Cultural pressure
Family, friends, church members and coworkers, etc. can make singleness seem like a curse and something we should eradicate from our lives as soon as possible. As a result, we throw our virtue to wind and watch it float away as we make "getting a man" our mission by any means necessary.
Tick tock goes the clock
The older we get, we begin paying closer attention to God's timeline for our lives. If it doesn't coincide with what we desire, we ladies begin focusing on our (or society's) time table of when we should be married and have children. And as a result, we force relationships we know don't and won't make us happy.
Temperature control
Sometimes we can drink in so much of our sexual desires that we become drunk and foggy with lust. This can cause us to blackout and fulfill our needs while ignoring the consequences. And as a result, that unwed fulfillment can leave us with hangovers of regret, more loneliness, emotional trauma, possible STDs and unwanted pregnancies.
NEW POEM: Putrid Fruit
I’m sorry to tell you this, but you are not a Christian.
No scratch that.
I’m not sorry.
And don’t get mad at me.
I’m just judging your tree, your soul by the fruit it bares…rotten fruit.
Your fruit oozes putrid hate as it wrongly calls the police on shades of coffee cream, walnut, honey, butter pecan, mocha and dark chocolate that innocently walks in the park trying to embrace the warm smooth breeze.
Your fruit releases poisonous gases as you take the breath of nonviolent melanin rich kings as they plead for you to stop suffocating their souls into oblivion.
Your fruit drips evil scarlet as it chases an innocent triangular trade descendent jogger down the street and releases ravenous bullets that rip into his body and demolish his existence into the past.
Your fruit reeks of archaic hostility as you make Tik Tok and Snapchat videos calling people of the African Diaspora “niggas” and “jungle bunnies” and “thugs.”
Your fruit twitches and has voluntary bipolar episodes as it arrests and beats middle passage descendants for wearing masks and for not wearing masks in public.
And you defend yourself by telling me that you’ve done none of these things.
But the truth is the day that you chose to close your privileged eyes to the detestable ugliness that your family…your friends…your church members…your classmates…even strangers that look like you have committed, you voluntarily became as monstrous as them.
So I’m sorry to tell you this, but you are not a Christian.
No scratch that.
I’m not sorry.
There’s no way you can serve the same Christ as me.
Because my God, my Yeshua, and yes his REAL name is Yeshua and not the preferred European name Jesus, was completely against this type of behavior and spoke against it boldly.
So if you really are a Christian, it’s time for you to put up or shut up.
And don’t get mad at me.
I’m just judging your tree, your soul by the fruit it bares…PUTRID FRUIT.
Whoever claims to love God yet hates a brother or sister is a liar. For whoever does not love their brother and sister, whom they have seen, cannot love God, whom they have not seen. And he has given us this command: Anyone who loves God must also love their brother and sister.—1 John 4:20-21
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No scratch that.
I’m not sorry.
And don’t get mad at me.
I’m just judging your tree, your soul by the fruit it bares…rotten fruit.
Your fruit oozes putrid hate as it wrongly calls the police on shades of coffee cream, walnut, honey, butter pecan, mocha and dark chocolate that innocently walks in the park trying to embrace the warm smooth breeze.
Your fruit releases poisonous gases as you take the breath of nonviolent melanin rich kings as they plead for you to stop suffocating their souls into oblivion.
Your fruit drips evil scarlet as it chases an innocent triangular trade descendent jogger down the street and releases ravenous bullets that rip into his body and demolish his existence into the past.
Your fruit reeks of archaic hostility as you make Tik Tok and Snapchat videos calling people of the African Diaspora “niggas” and “jungle bunnies” and “thugs.”
Your fruit twitches and has voluntary bipolar episodes as it arrests and beats middle passage descendants for wearing masks and for not wearing masks in public.
And you defend yourself by telling me that you’ve done none of these things.
But the truth is the day that you chose to close your privileged eyes to the detestable ugliness that your family…your friends…your church members…your classmates…even strangers that look like you have committed, you voluntarily became as monstrous as them.
So I’m sorry to tell you this, but you are not a Christian.
No scratch that.
I’m not sorry.
There’s no way you can serve the same Christ as me.
Because my God, my Yeshua, and yes his REAL name is Yeshua and not the preferred European name Jesus, was completely against this type of behavior and spoke against it boldly.
So if you really are a Christian, it’s time for you to put up or shut up.
And don’t get mad at me.
I’m just judging your tree, your soul by the fruit it bares…PUTRID FRUIT.
Whoever claims to love God yet hates a brother or sister is a liar. For whoever does not love their brother and sister, whom they have seen, cannot love God, whom they have not seen. And he has given us this command: Anyone who loves God must also love their brother and sister.—1 John 4:20-21
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NEW POEM: Ablaze Determination
I'm afraid.
Not of the raging stormy weather outside.
Not of the blinding flashes of lightning.
Not of the vigorous rubbles of thunder that quiver through my stomach and jerk my spirit awake.
Not of the aggressive drops of rain slamming against my window.
I'm afraid...
Of recklessness...
Shame...
Chaos...
Failure...
Insecurity...
I'm afraid of being afraid.
But I'm also fearless.
Fearless about my anointing.
Fearless about my ravishing connection with God.
Fearless about my robust convictions.
Fearless about my God-led desires.
Fearless about my unapologetic standards.
Fearless about how I love and deserve to be loved.
So how is it that I can be afraid and fearless in the same day...same hour...same minute?
Easy.
The spirit and the flesh don't always agree.
They sometimes fight like siblings fight to receive attention from a parent.
Rarely do they agree.
And that's okay.
That's a part of the human experience—our struggle.
But one plea and commitment to God changes everything.
I choose to continue to fight daily.
I choose to fight to embrace the Holy Spirit's guidance and not the ball of chaos that is Satan.
I choose ABLAZE DETERMINATION.
For the flesh desires what is contrary to the Spirit, and the Spirit what is contrary to the flesh. They are in conflict with each other, so that you are not to do whatever you want.—Galatians 5: 17
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Not of the raging stormy weather outside.
Not of the blinding flashes of lightning.
Not of the vigorous rubbles of thunder that quiver through my stomach and jerk my spirit awake.
Not of the aggressive drops of rain slamming against my window.
I'm afraid...
Of recklessness...
Shame...
Chaos...
Failure...
Insecurity...
I'm afraid of being afraid.
But I'm also fearless.
Fearless about my anointing.
Fearless about my ravishing connection with God.
Fearless about my robust convictions.
Fearless about my God-led desires.
Fearless about my unapologetic standards.
Fearless about how I love and deserve to be loved.
So how is it that I can be afraid and fearless in the same day...same hour...same minute?
Easy.
The spirit and the flesh don't always agree.
They sometimes fight like siblings fight to receive attention from a parent.
Rarely do they agree.
And that's okay.
That's a part of the human experience—our struggle.
But one plea and commitment to God changes everything.
I choose to continue to fight daily.
I choose to fight to embrace the Holy Spirit's guidance and not the ball of chaos that is Satan.
I choose ABLAZE DETERMINATION.
For the flesh desires what is contrary to the Spirit, and the Spirit what is contrary to the flesh. They are in conflict with each other, so that you are not to do whatever you want.—Galatians 5: 17
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UNAPOLOGETIC PLEA: A Prayer For Spiritual Purification
Come into the house that is my soul…
Examine it thoroughly…
Use every fine-tooth comb and magnifying glass…
Exterminate every creepy crawly thing that is infesting in the darkest parts of me…
Suffocate all negative thoughts that are trying to breathe death into my present…
Drown every distraction that is trying to cripple my anointing…
Trap my weaknesses and decimate them with your presence…
Plaster the holes in my walls with your angelic protection…
Seal my foundation cracks with your Messianic blood…
Guard and block my doors with the cross from your crucifixion…
Cover my windows with the ultimate weapon that is your word…
Build an impenetrable fortress around me that can repel all things that are putrid and deadly to my growth…
I give you all power and authority over my life and existence.
Yeshua (Jesus) this is my plea to you.
Amen.
Now is not the time to play Russian Roulette with our souls. COVID-19 is not a random virus that just happened to spread throughout the world. God is sending us a powerful message. He is not pleased with how we dismiss Him and dive into the depths of unruliness.
It’s time for us to repent and focus on God. Don’t let Satan trick you into thinking
God is not real and consequences don’t exist. God is very real. And so is hell.
Search me, God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.—Psalm 139: 23-24
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Examine it thoroughly…
Use every fine-tooth comb and magnifying glass…
Exterminate every creepy crawly thing that is infesting in the darkest parts of me…
Suffocate all negative thoughts that are trying to breathe death into my present…
Drown every distraction that is trying to cripple my anointing…
Trap my weaknesses and decimate them with your presence…
Plaster the holes in my walls with your angelic protection…
Seal my foundation cracks with your Messianic blood…
Guard and block my doors with the cross from your crucifixion…
Cover my windows with the ultimate weapon that is your word…
Build an impenetrable fortress around me that can repel all things that are putrid and deadly to my growth…
I give you all power and authority over my life and existence.
Yeshua (Jesus) this is my plea to you.
Amen.
Now is not the time to play Russian Roulette with our souls. COVID-19 is not a random virus that just happened to spread throughout the world. God is sending us a powerful message. He is not pleased with how we dismiss Him and dive into the depths of unruliness.
It’s time for us to repent and focus on God. Don’t let Satan trick you into thinking
God is not real and consequences don’t exist. God is very real. And so is hell.
Search me, God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.—Psalm 139: 23-24
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NEW POEM: Exquisite Savior
You are astounding in every way.
Darkness shivers and fleas at the unmistakable sound of your commanding name.
Every day time obeys you flawlessly by gently twirling the earth in perpetual spheres leaving it's footprints in everyone's psyches.
Your infinite beauty shines through vast waterfalls as the sun's light permeates them forming majestic rainbows that melt into each droplet of your glory.
Your timeless knowledge and wisdom raptures my soul in smooth streams of scriptural honey and exotic nectar.
Your delicate touch demolishes the spirits of fear, anger, low self-esteem, illness and addiction into oblivion when your children's cries bellow into the atmosphere.
Your subtle voice can calm a thousand treacherous seas while captivating the wind into joyful submission.
You are astounding in every way.
You are my savior and I will praise you in and out of the fires of life.
You are my EXQUISITE SAVIOR.
It’s super easy for us to let the fear of illness (specifically COVID-19), compromised finances and various levels and sources of chaos throw us off of our spiritual game. Now is the time for us to act and react like the Christians we are. Now is the time for us to stop being selfish and immature towards each other. Now is the time to stop being consumed with the desire to experience worldly pleasure. Now is the time for us to focus on God more than we focus on our circumstances and allow Him to guide us and let us know how we should respond during this intense and uncertain time. Now is the time for us to remember who God is—He is excellent.
About midnight Paul and Silas were praying and singing hymns to God, and the other prisoners were listening to them. Suddenly there was such a violent earthquake that the foundations of the prison were shaken. At once all the prison doors flew open, and everyone’s chains came loose.—Acts 16:25-26
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Darkness shivers and fleas at the unmistakable sound of your commanding name.
Every day time obeys you flawlessly by gently twirling the earth in perpetual spheres leaving it's footprints in everyone's psyches.
Your infinite beauty shines through vast waterfalls as the sun's light permeates them forming majestic rainbows that melt into each droplet of your glory.
Your timeless knowledge and wisdom raptures my soul in smooth streams of scriptural honey and exotic nectar.
Your delicate touch demolishes the spirits of fear, anger, low self-esteem, illness and addiction into oblivion when your children's cries bellow into the atmosphere.
Your subtle voice can calm a thousand treacherous seas while captivating the wind into joyful submission.
You are astounding in every way.
You are my savior and I will praise you in and out of the fires of life.
You are my EXQUISITE SAVIOR.
It’s super easy for us to let the fear of illness (specifically COVID-19), compromised finances and various levels and sources of chaos throw us off of our spiritual game. Now is the time for us to act and react like the Christians we are. Now is the time for us to stop being selfish and immature towards each other. Now is the time to stop being consumed with the desire to experience worldly pleasure. Now is the time for us to focus on God more than we focus on our circumstances and allow Him to guide us and let us know how we should respond during this intense and uncertain time. Now is the time for us to remember who God is—He is excellent.
About midnight Paul and Silas were praying and singing hymns to God, and the other prisoners were listening to them. Suddenly there was such a violent earthquake that the foundations of the prison were shaken. At once all the prison doors flew open, and everyone’s chains came loose.—Acts 16:25-26
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NEW POEM: Heartfelt Love
What is this feeling that I feel?
The feeling of prismatic-hued butterflies rhythmically playing hide-and-go-seek near my belly button every time I recollect your intoxicating presence in my life...
The feeling of fierce warmth that slowly seeps from my heart and effortlessly raptures my delicate soul...
The feeling that overflows me with glowing happiness in the midst of a foggy day...
What is this feeling that I feel?
The hypnotic feeling that gives me soft cozy chills every time I hear endearing words roll off your tongue daily...
The mesmerizing feeling that makes my midnight eyes sparkle at the presence of your gleaming smile whenever you glance my way...
The immeasurable genuine feeling that enthralls my body at the thought of your flawless genteel touch...
The captivating feeling that washes over me like a pristine exotic waterfall of endless passion...
So what is this feeling that I feel?
It’s the feeling of HEARTFELT LOVE.
It’s imperative that we recognize and respect what real love is. God is love. And if He is the embodiment of love, then we should acknowledge that anyone that rejects Him can’t really love us the way we should be loved. And if that person can’t love us properly, we shouldn’t waste our time with that person.
Settling for anything less than Christ-inspired love is poison to our tranquility and brilliance. God did not create us to settle. Ignore the “clock” that tells you that you’re getting old and that you must hurry up and marry the next person that comes your way so you can be seen as “grown” or a “real lady.” God’s clock is working perfectly. He’ll send you the right person at the right time.
Place me like a seal over your heart, like a seal on your arm; for love is as strong as death, its jealousy unyielding as the grave. It burns like blazing fire, like a mighty flame. Many waters cannot quench love; rivers cannot sweep it away. If one were to give all the wealth of one’s house for love, it would be utterly scorned.—Song of Solomon 8:6-7
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The feeling of prismatic-hued butterflies rhythmically playing hide-and-go-seek near my belly button every time I recollect your intoxicating presence in my life...
The feeling of fierce warmth that slowly seeps from my heart and effortlessly raptures my delicate soul...
The feeling that overflows me with glowing happiness in the midst of a foggy day...
What is this feeling that I feel?
The hypnotic feeling that gives me soft cozy chills every time I hear endearing words roll off your tongue daily...
The mesmerizing feeling that makes my midnight eyes sparkle at the presence of your gleaming smile whenever you glance my way...
The immeasurable genuine feeling that enthralls my body at the thought of your flawless genteel touch...
The captivating feeling that washes over me like a pristine exotic waterfall of endless passion...
So what is this feeling that I feel?
It’s the feeling of HEARTFELT LOVE.
It’s imperative that we recognize and respect what real love is. God is love. And if He is the embodiment of love, then we should acknowledge that anyone that rejects Him can’t really love us the way we should be loved. And if that person can’t love us properly, we shouldn’t waste our time with that person.
Settling for anything less than Christ-inspired love is poison to our tranquility and brilliance. God did not create us to settle. Ignore the “clock” that tells you that you’re getting old and that you must hurry up and marry the next person that comes your way so you can be seen as “grown” or a “real lady.” God’s clock is working perfectly. He’ll send you the right person at the right time.
Place me like a seal over your heart, like a seal on your arm; for love is as strong as death, its jealousy unyielding as the grave. It burns like blazing fire, like a mighty flame. Many waters cannot quench love; rivers cannot sweep it away. If one were to give all the wealth of one’s house for love, it would be utterly scorned.—Song of Solomon 8:6-7
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NEW POEM: Sun Kisses
I am sooo blessed to have been kissed by you.
I admire the way some of your kisses are gentle, smooth and innocent, while others are strong, deep and submerged with passion only you can create.
Your kisses are unique and filled with eternal surprises because you never perform the same kiss twice.
The kiss I received from you was consumed with smooth anticipation, buttery enthusiasm and a honey-like nature.
The kiss I received from you was that of butter pecan raindrops that entail a cup of sensual caramel with a hint of mouthwatering coffee cream.
The kiss I received from you was that of a crème brulee latte that was garnished with laces of whipped cream, streams of toffee and joyful tears of mocha.
The kiss I received from you was that of praline mousse that was engulfed with trails of pecans, lakes of walnuts and islands of ganache.
Yes, the kiss you gave me was flawless, tasteful and full of pride.
I will always be grateful for being blessed with endearing kisses...loving kisses...SUN KISSES.
We should all feel beyond blessed to be whatever complexion God created us to be. We must realize that no one's complexion is better than someone else's. Satan wants us to demonize ourselves and others. We must fight back with the truth. We are ALL God's stunning creations. And we ALL deserve to be treated as such.
I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.—Psalm 139:14
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I admire the way some of your kisses are gentle, smooth and innocent, while others are strong, deep and submerged with passion only you can create.
Your kisses are unique and filled with eternal surprises because you never perform the same kiss twice.
The kiss I received from you was consumed with smooth anticipation, buttery enthusiasm and a honey-like nature.
The kiss I received from you was that of butter pecan raindrops that entail a cup of sensual caramel with a hint of mouthwatering coffee cream.
The kiss I received from you was that of a crème brulee latte that was garnished with laces of whipped cream, streams of toffee and joyful tears of mocha.
The kiss I received from you was that of praline mousse that was engulfed with trails of pecans, lakes of walnuts and islands of ganache.
Yes, the kiss you gave me was flawless, tasteful and full of pride.
I will always be grateful for being blessed with endearing kisses...loving kisses...SUN KISSES.
We should all feel beyond blessed to be whatever complexion God created us to be. We must realize that no one's complexion is better than someone else's. Satan wants us to demonize ourselves and others. We must fight back with the truth. We are ALL God's stunning creations. And we ALL deserve to be treated as such.
I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.—Psalm 139:14
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NEW POEM: Virtuous Alarm
You don’t respect me.
You think I’m always going to be here, but you’re wrong.
You ignore me as you dive into a pool of murky false pleasures that tickle your unquenchable dark fancy.
You ignore me as you swim deeper and unapologetically frolic with sexual temptresses of putrid infidelity, vile promiscuity and detestable selfsame pleasures.
You ignore me as you dance to the aquatic hypnosis of everything that glorifies your suffocating earthly appetite instead of the Alpha and Omega.
You ignore me as you glide into the deceitful rapturous currant of horrid chaos, ravenous malice and endless vexation.
You ignore me as you dive into the cold oceanic valleys of permanent familial breaches, consuming self-absorption and additive demonic chemical oblivion.
You think that you can continue to ignore me as you purposely allow your spiritual lungs to fill up with liquid sin.
You think that you will always have a chance to hold your breath as you swim to the top and purge your lungs of your deadly explorations, but you’re wrong.
You’re too late.
You have me no more.
You permanently lost a piece of me every second that passed.
I am time.
And you have me no more.
You missed your chance to repent and now you must reap every vile seed you sowed.
This is your official VIRTUOUS ALARM.
It’s extremely important that we remember that this is not our permanent home. One day we will die and we will only go to one place—heaven or hell. Each day we walk closer to one place or the other. We don’t have time to play games. The time to get it right is now. Tomorrow might be too late.
The acts of the flesh are obvious: sexual immorality, impurity and debauchery; idolatry and witchcraft; hatred, discord, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambition, dissensions, factions and envy; drunkenness, orgies, and the like. I warn you, as I did before, that those who live like this will not inherit the kingdom of God.—Galatians 5:19-21
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You think I’m always going to be here, but you’re wrong.
You ignore me as you dive into a pool of murky false pleasures that tickle your unquenchable dark fancy.
You ignore me as you swim deeper and unapologetically frolic with sexual temptresses of putrid infidelity, vile promiscuity and detestable selfsame pleasures.
You ignore me as you dance to the aquatic hypnosis of everything that glorifies your suffocating earthly appetite instead of the Alpha and Omega.
You ignore me as you glide into the deceitful rapturous currant of horrid chaos, ravenous malice and endless vexation.
You ignore me as you dive into the cold oceanic valleys of permanent familial breaches, consuming self-absorption and additive demonic chemical oblivion.
You think that you can continue to ignore me as you purposely allow your spiritual lungs to fill up with liquid sin.
You think that you will always have a chance to hold your breath as you swim to the top and purge your lungs of your deadly explorations, but you’re wrong.
You’re too late.
You have me no more.
You permanently lost a piece of me every second that passed.
I am time.
And you have me no more.
You missed your chance to repent and now you must reap every vile seed you sowed.
This is your official VIRTUOUS ALARM.
It’s extremely important that we remember that this is not our permanent home. One day we will die and we will only go to one place—heaven or hell. Each day we walk closer to one place or the other. We don’t have time to play games. The time to get it right is now. Tomorrow might be too late.
The acts of the flesh are obvious: sexual immorality, impurity and debauchery; idolatry and witchcraft; hatred, discord, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambition, dissensions, factions and envy; drunkenness, orgies, and the like. I warn you, as I did before, that those who live like this will not inherit the kingdom of God.—Galatians 5:19-21
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NEW POEM: Self-Imposed Fallacy
I’m in love.
I’m in love with the perfect guy.
We’ve been dating for years and I know that he will be my future eternal everything.
He surpasses everything my extensively vivid imagination could ever create.
His smooth voice massages my eardrums with deep streams of silky words filled with undeniable truth.
His potent honey complexion and intense almond-shaped espresso portals cause my butter pecan to seamlessly transition into scarlet daily.
His kisses taste like…
His cologne smells like…
His touch feels like…
Well…I can’t answer any of things because I’ve never met him.
I don’t know his last name.
I don’t know where he lives.
I don’t know what he does for a living.
I don’t know anything about his family.
And I don’t know anything about his friends.
But trust me.
I love him and he loves me…I think.
Wait.
How can I love someone I don’t know?
Love requires more than texting, phone calls, one video chat and being social media “friends”.
Love requires authentic transparency that allows someone to see past the surface and into the depths of your most vulnerable places.
Love requires limitless patience and keen understanding.
Love requires continuous openness to get to know someone’s beautifully complex mind, body and spirit.
Love requires intimacy.
Wait a minute.
If really knowing and loving someone requires all of this, how well do I know Christ?
I guess I don’t know Him…
I guess I’m in a SELF-IMPOSED FALLACY.
It’s vital that we assess that status of our relationship with Christ daily. Being a Christian is more than just saying we know Him. It’s living out our knowledge and acceptance of His word. If we say we love Him and never try to form an intimate relationship with Him, we are in spiritual trouble. We need to ask ourselves if we are growing closer to Him or farther apart. Have you checked your relationship status with Him today?
Whoever says, “I know him,” but does not do what he commands is a liar, and the truth is not in that person.—1 John 2:4
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I’m in love with the perfect guy.
We’ve been dating for years and I know that he will be my future eternal everything.
He surpasses everything my extensively vivid imagination could ever create.
His smooth voice massages my eardrums with deep streams of silky words filled with undeniable truth.
His potent honey complexion and intense almond-shaped espresso portals cause my butter pecan to seamlessly transition into scarlet daily.
His kisses taste like…
His cologne smells like…
His touch feels like…
Well…I can’t answer any of things because I’ve never met him.
I don’t know his last name.
I don’t know where he lives.
I don’t know what he does for a living.
I don’t know anything about his family.
And I don’t know anything about his friends.
But trust me.
I love him and he loves me…I think.
Wait.
How can I love someone I don’t know?
Love requires more than texting, phone calls, one video chat and being social media “friends”.
Love requires authentic transparency that allows someone to see past the surface and into the depths of your most vulnerable places.
Love requires limitless patience and keen understanding.
Love requires continuous openness to get to know someone’s beautifully complex mind, body and spirit.
Love requires intimacy.
Wait a minute.
If really knowing and loving someone requires all of this, how well do I know Christ?
I guess I don’t know Him…
I guess I’m in a SELF-IMPOSED FALLACY.
It’s vital that we assess that status of our relationship with Christ daily. Being a Christian is more than just saying we know Him. It’s living out our knowledge and acceptance of His word. If we say we love Him and never try to form an intimate relationship with Him, we are in spiritual trouble. We need to ask ourselves if we are growing closer to Him or farther apart. Have you checked your relationship status with Him today?
Whoever says, “I know him,” but does not do what he commands is a liar, and the truth is not in that person.—1 John 2:4
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Are You A Secret Victim Of Sexual Assault?
You wake up in a cold sweat and shaking with nightmares of the horrific violation you experienced last week. You jump into the shower and try to scrub away the dreadful flashbacks you’re having of the night when your mind, body and spirit received the ultimate desecration. The more you scrub, the more uncontrollable tears cascade down your face like waterfalls of sorrow.
You lay on the shower floor crying and wishing you could turn back time and not go back to your friend Fabian’s (your rapist) dorm room. “Why did this happen to me? Why would he hurt me like this…,” you cry. When you hear your roommate calling your name, you quickly stand up and try to swallow the sobbing in voice and answer her. You get out of the shower and assess your face to make sure you don’t look like you’ve been crying because you’re determined to keep this secret. “I can never tell anyone what happened. I’m so embarrassed,” you whisper to yourself.
Thousands and thousands of women are raped every year. Most of them are violated by people they know (father, brother, cousin, uncle, friend, boyfriend, husband, etc.). Many never report it or tell anyone because they are ashamed and feel people will not believe them and/or look down on them. As a result, they carry an unnecessary load of guilt and shame and their violator continues to run free.
It’s vital that we remember that God doesn’t want us to carry other people’s sin. He wants us to free ourselves from trauma and turn our pain into our power. The only way we can achieve this is by being honest with ourselves and others. Know that the Lord will see you through the difficult process of revealing your violator. You deserve to be safe, happy and free from guilt.
“But if out in the country a man happens to meet a young woman pledged to be married and rapes her, only the man who has done this shall die. Do nothing to the woman; she has committed no sin deserving death…for the man found the young woman out in the country, and though the betrothed woman screamed, there was no one to rescue her.” Deuteronomy 22:25-27
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You lay on the shower floor crying and wishing you could turn back time and not go back to your friend Fabian’s (your rapist) dorm room. “Why did this happen to me? Why would he hurt me like this…,” you cry. When you hear your roommate calling your name, you quickly stand up and try to swallow the sobbing in voice and answer her. You get out of the shower and assess your face to make sure you don’t look like you’ve been crying because you’re determined to keep this secret. “I can never tell anyone what happened. I’m so embarrassed,” you whisper to yourself.
Thousands and thousands of women are raped every year. Most of them are violated by people they know (father, brother, cousin, uncle, friend, boyfriend, husband, etc.). Many never report it or tell anyone because they are ashamed and feel people will not believe them and/or look down on them. As a result, they carry an unnecessary load of guilt and shame and their violator continues to run free.
It’s vital that we remember that God doesn’t want us to carry other people’s sin. He wants us to free ourselves from trauma and turn our pain into our power. The only way we can achieve this is by being honest with ourselves and others. Know that the Lord will see you through the difficult process of revealing your violator. You deserve to be safe, happy and free from guilt.
“But if out in the country a man happens to meet a young woman pledged to be married and rapes her, only the man who has done this shall die. Do nothing to the woman; she has committed no sin deserving death…for the man found the young woman out in the country, and though the betrothed woman screamed, there was no one to rescue her.” Deuteronomy 22:25-27
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NEW POEM: Impenetrable Shield
Heavy raindrops of intimidation slowly cascade down the windows of my soul.
Each droplet does its best to permeate the glass, but it fails every time because I’m shielded by a protective layer of spiritual anointing that refuses to let foolishness near my essence.
When the rain realizes it can’t seep through, it begins to beat harder against my windows hoping it can drown out my tranquil thoughts and influential words.
It fails, but it remains relentless and calls for backup.
Soon chaotic wind makes an appearance and begins to slam the rain against my windows with wrathful slashes that threaten to fracture my unflustered composure.
It fails, but it remains relentless and calls for more backup.
Soon I begin to see flashes of persistent lightning that try to blind me from seeing my anointed path.
It fails, but remains relentless and calls for more backup.
Soon I begin to hear the commanding harsh sounds of thunder trying to shake and drown out the Holy Spirit’s voice from giving me wisdom and knowledge.
It fails.
The more the children of spiritual demolition try to silence me, the harder I meditate on God’s word and promises for my life.
No matter how much they huff and puff, the windows of my soul won’t shatter.
I can’t and won’t be silenced because God created me to spread His message of grace and mercy unapologetically.
If you’re looking to crush something, you’ve come to the wrong place.
I have a shield comprised of indestructible holy material called the Holy Spirit’s anointing.
I have an IMPENETRABLE SHIELD.
It’s imperative that we understand that today’s society does not appreciate the truth and God’s message. However, we must be prepared to boldly speak and live out God’s word no matter how many feathers it ruffles. We must pray and meditate to remain focused on pleasing God instead of the world. If we do that, we will receive eternal blessings instead of receiving temporary worldly acceptance. Remember silence isn’t always golden.
God blesses you when people mock you and persecute you and lie about you and say all sorts of evil things against you because you are my followers.—Matthew 5: 11
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Heavy raindrops of intimidation slowly cascade down the windows of my soul.
Each droplet does its best to permeate the glass, but it fails every time because I’m shielded by a protective layer of spiritual anointing that refuses to let foolishness near my essence.
When the rain realizes it can’t seep through, it begins to beat harder against my windows hoping it can drown out my tranquil thoughts and influential words.
It fails, but it remains relentless and calls for backup.
Soon chaotic wind makes an appearance and begins to slam the rain against my windows with wrathful slashes that threaten to fracture my unflustered composure.
It fails, but it remains relentless and calls for more backup.
Soon I begin to see flashes of persistent lightning that try to blind me from seeing my anointed path.
It fails, but remains relentless and calls for more backup.
Soon I begin to hear the commanding harsh sounds of thunder trying to shake and drown out the Holy Spirit’s voice from giving me wisdom and knowledge.
It fails.
The more the children of spiritual demolition try to silence me, the harder I meditate on God’s word and promises for my life.
No matter how much they huff and puff, the windows of my soul won’t shatter.
I can’t and won’t be silenced because God created me to spread His message of grace and mercy unapologetically.
If you’re looking to crush something, you’ve come to the wrong place.
I have a shield comprised of indestructible holy material called the Holy Spirit’s anointing.
I have an IMPENETRABLE SHIELD.
It’s imperative that we understand that today’s society does not appreciate the truth and God’s message. However, we must be prepared to boldly speak and live out God’s word no matter how many feathers it ruffles. We must pray and meditate to remain focused on pleasing God instead of the world. If we do that, we will receive eternal blessings instead of receiving temporary worldly acceptance. Remember silence isn’t always golden.
God blesses you when people mock you and persecute you and lie about you and say all sorts of evil things against you because you are my followers.—Matthew 5: 11
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NEW POEM: Regal Resilience
I’m not a queen, but I’m royalty.
The liquid crimson that flows through my veins isn’t filled with fierce earthly pleasure or privilege.
I don’t live in a palace filled with endless rooms of bliss and fountains that drip golden dreams and turn into vast reality as they cascade down marble opportunity.
I don’t own a fleet of yachts that can sail me into the sea of elite euphoria and drown financial stress and societal obscurity into oblivion.
I don’t own a lot of things, but my value isn’t based on perishable things.
My value runs deep.
I come from a chosen people whose bloodline began at the cross when faultless scarlet seeped out of the wounds of our humble King’s body.
I come from a royal priesthood that’s been preaching our King’s message of love and light for over 2,000 years.
I come from a holy nation that fights daily to embody resplendent wisdom and repel putrid attitudes.
I am our Almighty King’s special possession and I refuse to aim for anything less than spectacular.
Walking in the darkness of jealousy, anger, fear, depression and insecurity is beneath my royal status.
Walking in the light of joy, peace, faith, hope and self-love is my only option.
So you see I’m not a queen, but I’m royalty.
I am saved by grace through faith.
I am a woman of God.
I am REGAL RESILIENCE.
But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, God's special possession, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light.—1 Peter 2:9
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The liquid crimson that flows through my veins isn’t filled with fierce earthly pleasure or privilege.
I don’t live in a palace filled with endless rooms of bliss and fountains that drip golden dreams and turn into vast reality as they cascade down marble opportunity.
I don’t own a fleet of yachts that can sail me into the sea of elite euphoria and drown financial stress and societal obscurity into oblivion.
I don’t own a lot of things, but my value isn’t based on perishable things.
My value runs deep.
I come from a chosen people whose bloodline began at the cross when faultless scarlet seeped out of the wounds of our humble King’s body.
I come from a royal priesthood that’s been preaching our King’s message of love and light for over 2,000 years.
I come from a holy nation that fights daily to embody resplendent wisdom and repel putrid attitudes.
I am our Almighty King’s special possession and I refuse to aim for anything less than spectacular.
Walking in the darkness of jealousy, anger, fear, depression and insecurity is beneath my royal status.
Walking in the light of joy, peace, faith, hope and self-love is my only option.
So you see I’m not a queen, but I’m royalty.
I am saved by grace through faith.
I am a woman of God.
I am REGAL RESILIENCE.
But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, God's special possession, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light.—1 Peter 2:9
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NEW POEM: PERTINACIOUS WISDOM
Her unblemished beauty is incomprehensible to the natural psyche.
Her indubitable elegance flows into a room like a velvety breeze and I happily inhale it and allow my essence to elevate to endless heights of intellectual bliss and emotional potency.
Her divine nectar-filled words cascade out of her pristine mouth with plenteous passion and exquisite enthusiasm.
Her splendid values are never filled with wrathful envy, unrelenting greed, or lethal insecurity.
She never allows trendy societal pressure to stop her from embodying spiritual brilliance or impenetrable strength.
She doesn’t wallow in soul-crushing negativity because it’s beneath her artless anointing.
She never allows anything to get in her way because she’s too fly for that.
She is one of God’s supreme gifts.
She is PERTINACIOUS WISDOM.
Do not forsake wisdom, and she will protect you; love her, and she will watch over you.—Proverbs 4:6
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Her indubitable elegance flows into a room like a velvety breeze and I happily inhale it and allow my essence to elevate to endless heights of intellectual bliss and emotional potency.
Her divine nectar-filled words cascade out of her pristine mouth with plenteous passion and exquisite enthusiasm.
Her splendid values are never filled with wrathful envy, unrelenting greed, or lethal insecurity.
She never allows trendy societal pressure to stop her from embodying spiritual brilliance or impenetrable strength.
She doesn’t wallow in soul-crushing negativity because it’s beneath her artless anointing.
She never allows anything to get in her way because she’s too fly for that.
She is one of God’s supreme gifts.
She is PERTINACIOUS WISDOM.
Do not forsake wisdom, and she will protect you; love her, and she will watch over you.—Proverbs 4:6
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NEW POEM: Gleaming Bliss
I am floating…
I am floating on an endless sea that is kissed with hints of vibrant emerald and soft aqua hues with flecks of glistening gold from the sun.
I am allowing the fingerless fingers of this aquatic gem to flirt with my butter pecan hue as I surrender to each gentle playful wave that comes my way.
I am inhaling the warm/cool aroma that caresses my nostrils with sweet inspiration and cool confidence.
As silky splashes tickle my voluptuous lips, I savor succulent droplets of effortless tranquility and timeless creativity.
My espresso portals bask in awe of your dazzling beauty that hypnotizes them with brilliant cleverness and classy wisdom.
My delicate eardrums dance to the mellow melodious rhythm of your serene groove that has no beginning or end.
I am experiencing the epitome self-discovery...
I am experiencing the purity that is peace by fully embracing my anointing.
I am experiencing GLEAMING BLISS.
It’s vital that we obey God’s calling for our lives. we must realize that it’s a blessing when we finally realize why God has created us and what He has created us to do for His glory. If we want to experience REAL peace and success (in God’s sight) we must embrace our anointing.
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I am floating on an endless sea that is kissed with hints of vibrant emerald and soft aqua hues with flecks of glistening gold from the sun.
I am allowing the fingerless fingers of this aquatic gem to flirt with my butter pecan hue as I surrender to each gentle playful wave that comes my way.
I am inhaling the warm/cool aroma that caresses my nostrils with sweet inspiration and cool confidence.
As silky splashes tickle my voluptuous lips, I savor succulent droplets of effortless tranquility and timeless creativity.
My espresso portals bask in awe of your dazzling beauty that hypnotizes them with brilliant cleverness and classy wisdom.
My delicate eardrums dance to the mellow melodious rhythm of your serene groove that has no beginning or end.
I am experiencing the epitome self-discovery...
I am experiencing the purity that is peace by fully embracing my anointing.
I am experiencing GLEAMING BLISS.
It’s vital that we obey God’s calling for our lives. we must realize that it’s a blessing when we finally realize why God has created us and what He has created us to do for His glory. If we want to experience REAL peace and success (in God’s sight) we must embrace our anointing.
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NEW POEM: Unceasing Faith
You want me, but you can’t have me.
I’m not yours, nor will I ever be.
You want to flood my bloodstream with melancholy liquid that’s meant to taint my anointed strength and wash away my passionate smile.
You want to pollute my nostrils with a horrendous stench that can seep into my fortified soul and scramble my composure.
You want to burst my delicate eardrums with your violent screeching insults and leave them bleeding innumerable hopelessness.
You want to tamper my vital taste buds with unspeakable bitterness and revolting rotten tricks and treats.
You want to cripple my controlled tranquility and leave me paralyzed in an abyss of dismal nothingness.
You want to blind me with warped scenes of continuous failure and inferiority.
You want me to crumple, but I won’t.
You see, I don’t and will never bow down to fear.
My anointing and faith won’t let me.
I will always fight back with UNCEASING FAITH.
“Submit yourselves, then, to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.”—James 4:7
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I’m not yours, nor will I ever be.
You want to flood my bloodstream with melancholy liquid that’s meant to taint my anointed strength and wash away my passionate smile.
You want to pollute my nostrils with a horrendous stench that can seep into my fortified soul and scramble my composure.
You want to burst my delicate eardrums with your violent screeching insults and leave them bleeding innumerable hopelessness.
You want to tamper my vital taste buds with unspeakable bitterness and revolting rotten tricks and treats.
You want to cripple my controlled tranquility and leave me paralyzed in an abyss of dismal nothingness.
You want to blind me with warped scenes of continuous failure and inferiority.
You want me to crumple, but I won’t.
You see, I don’t and will never bow down to fear.
My anointing and faith won’t let me.
I will always fight back with UNCEASING FAITH.
“Submit yourselves, then, to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.”—James 4:7
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NEW POEM: Masked Deceiver
It doesn’t discriminate.
It comes like a thief in the night.
It seeps into your delicate pores and suffocates them with noxious toxins that destroy everything in its path.
It rapidly travels through your bloodstream like a ravenous sinister river rushing to crush impenetrable boulders into oblivion.
It infiltrates your healthy heart with potent platelets of infinite disaster and remorseless turmoil that collapses its effervescent essence into the past.
It devours your exquisite soul by engulfing it in a quenchless sea of bottomless upheaval and icy gloom.
Once it annihilates your soul, it embodies liquid anxiety that streams out of your espresso portals and pollutes your once anointed verbal expressions into futile gibberish.
Its power is immeasurable.
It’s determined to bless/curse everyone with its passionate poisonous kisses that suck holy positivity out of your essence.
It’s the spirit of fear.
Its only job is to make you to forget God’s word and promises.
So beware.
Fear is the ultimate MASKED DECEIVER.
“The Lord is on my side. I will fear not. What can man do to me? It is better to trust in the Lord than to put confidence in man.”—Psalm 118: 6,8
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It comes like a thief in the night.
It seeps into your delicate pores and suffocates them with noxious toxins that destroy everything in its path.
It rapidly travels through your bloodstream like a ravenous sinister river rushing to crush impenetrable boulders into oblivion.
It infiltrates your healthy heart with potent platelets of infinite disaster and remorseless turmoil that collapses its effervescent essence into the past.
It devours your exquisite soul by engulfing it in a quenchless sea of bottomless upheaval and icy gloom.
Once it annihilates your soul, it embodies liquid anxiety that streams out of your espresso portals and pollutes your once anointed verbal expressions into futile gibberish.
Its power is immeasurable.
It’s determined to bless/curse everyone with its passionate poisonous kisses that suck holy positivity out of your essence.
It’s the spirit of fear.
Its only job is to make you to forget God’s word and promises.
So beware.
Fear is the ultimate MASKED DECEIVER.
“The Lord is on my side. I will fear not. What can man do to me? It is better to trust in the Lord than to put confidence in man.”—Psalm 118: 6,8
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NEW POEM: Personal Deception
She thinks she's incognito.
She thinks her cleverness has put the world in a trance to obey her every command.
She thinks we see her as flawless, but she's wrong.
We hear her half truths that are mixed with 100% malice against anyone that's in her way.
We see her treacherous envious gaze through her emerald portals as she sees someone that possesses what she desires, but will never be able to acquire.
We taste her honey-covered venom that that seeps out of every backhanded compliment that glides off of her luscious putrid lips.
We experience frostbite every time she curses us with an embrace that leaves behind icy traces of severe deceit, hatred and chaos.
We smell the foul stench of rancid insecurity, delusions and jealousy as they flow through our anti-folly nostrils whenever she speaks ill of someone that's done nothing to her.
This woman has chosen to cover-up her broken spiritual bones with fancy clothes, money and a transparent smile.
This woman thinks she is revered by many and loved by most.
Unfortunately, she doesn't realize a broken tree can only produce broken fruit that no one wants to consume.
She is fooling no one but herself.
This woman is experiencing PERSONAL DECEPTION.
It is imperative that we realize that people will eventually recognize the real us. If we are honest, they will see it. If we are deceitful, they will see it. Time always tells the truth. If we want to be our best, we must be honest with ourselves.
“Do not be wise in your own eyes; fear the LORD and shun evil. This will bring health to your body and nourishment to your bones.”—Proverbs 3:7-8
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She thinks her cleverness has put the world in a trance to obey her every command.
She thinks we see her as flawless, but she's wrong.
We hear her half truths that are mixed with 100% malice against anyone that's in her way.
We see her treacherous envious gaze through her emerald portals as she sees someone that possesses what she desires, but will never be able to acquire.
We taste her honey-covered venom that that seeps out of every backhanded compliment that glides off of her luscious putrid lips.
We experience frostbite every time she curses us with an embrace that leaves behind icy traces of severe deceit, hatred and chaos.
We smell the foul stench of rancid insecurity, delusions and jealousy as they flow through our anti-folly nostrils whenever she speaks ill of someone that's done nothing to her.
This woman has chosen to cover-up her broken spiritual bones with fancy clothes, money and a transparent smile.
This woman thinks she is revered by many and loved by most.
Unfortunately, she doesn't realize a broken tree can only produce broken fruit that no one wants to consume.
She is fooling no one but herself.
This woman is experiencing PERSONAL DECEPTION.
It is imperative that we realize that people will eventually recognize the real us. If we are honest, they will see it. If we are deceitful, they will see it. Time always tells the truth. If we want to be our best, we must be honest with ourselves.
“Do not be wise in your own eyes; fear the LORD and shun evil. This will bring health to your body and nourishment to your bones.”—Proverbs 3:7-8
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NEW POEM: Majestic Effervescence
I am floating in an endless emerald sea with delicate waves of tranquility washing over my butter pecan complexion.
I am staring at the powder blue sky that is sprinkled with cotton candy-like clouds that are in no rush to reach their final destination.
I am blissfully allowing the cool soft breeze to caress and tickle my skin as it tries to decide which direction is best.
I am smiling as I feel the sun sending infinite beams of kisses my way with no sign of dimming its dazzling awesomeness.
I am experiencing the spectacular excellence that is the Holy Spirit living inside me.
He is my light.
He is my sanity.
He is my peace.
He is my MAJESTIC EFFERVESCENCE.
Is He yours?
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I am staring at the powder blue sky that is sprinkled with cotton candy-like clouds that are in no rush to reach their final destination.
I am blissfully allowing the cool soft breeze to caress and tickle my skin as it tries to decide which direction is best.
I am smiling as I feel the sun sending infinite beams of kisses my way with no sign of dimming its dazzling awesomeness.
I am experiencing the spectacular excellence that is the Holy Spirit living inside me.
He is my light.
He is my sanity.
He is my peace.
He is my MAJESTIC EFFERVESCENCE.
Is He yours?
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Do You Let Prejudice And Racism Kill Your Spirit?
You drive to the supermarket to buy your mother cold and flu medicine. As your eyes scan various medicine boxes claiming to be able to diminish several irritating symptoms, your mind begins to swirl in a mixture of medical promises, prices and actual facts. You take out your cell phone and call your mother to see which medicine she prefers. After you hang up your phone, you unzip your black satchel purse and drop your phone inside. As you begin to zip your purse back up, you hear a deep raspy voice say, “Watch your purse on this aisle.” You immediately look up and see a man with leathery vanilla skin, a frowning face and piercing eyes staring at you as he and his wife (or whoever she was) enter the medicine aisle.
You stand in silence because you know he’s not talking about you. You look to your left and to your right and realize that no one else is in the aisle so he has to be referring to you. And just when you try to lie to yourself and tell yourself you are overreacting, the leathery face brokenness looks you in the eyes, while touching the shoulder of the lady with him and says, “Watch your purse on this aisle,” in a louder, harsher tone.
For about two seconds you stare at each other. You know he wants you to say something so his chapped lips can spew out putrid racist ignorance. A part of you wants to punch him in the face and loosen a few of his pecan-hued teeth. A part of you wants to slice him with crafty words far above his education level. A part of you wants to vomit up his slimy words that your ears ingested on his crooked over once brown boots. But in reality, you do none of these things. The Holy Spirit takes over and gives you the strength to walk away. He reminds you that that man did not and will not hurt you with his hate. His atrocious statement wasn’t planted in your field. It was planted in his. He reminds you that it wasn’t the time or the place to address the boogie man that is racism.
We live in a society that sees differences (sex, race, ethnicity, class, etc.) as a curse instead of a blessing. It's become okay to demean and underestimate someone based on their background. Today tensions are rising rapidly and we must find a way to conquer them without our spirits being tainted.
It's vital that we recognize that Satan is playing a dangerous game in our lives. He wants us to hate each other and isolate ourselves from one another. We must to be open to learning about our differences. We don't always have to agree or understand, but we should all be able to respect each other. God created us all to praise Him and spread His love. In order to do that, we cannot embody hatred.
“Anyone who claims to be in the light but hates a brother or sister is still in the darkness.”—1 John 2:9
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You stand in silence because you know he’s not talking about you. You look to your left and to your right and realize that no one else is in the aisle so he has to be referring to you. And just when you try to lie to yourself and tell yourself you are overreacting, the leathery face brokenness looks you in the eyes, while touching the shoulder of the lady with him and says, “Watch your purse on this aisle,” in a louder, harsher tone.
For about two seconds you stare at each other. You know he wants you to say something so his chapped lips can spew out putrid racist ignorance. A part of you wants to punch him in the face and loosen a few of his pecan-hued teeth. A part of you wants to slice him with crafty words far above his education level. A part of you wants to vomit up his slimy words that your ears ingested on his crooked over once brown boots. But in reality, you do none of these things. The Holy Spirit takes over and gives you the strength to walk away. He reminds you that that man did not and will not hurt you with his hate. His atrocious statement wasn’t planted in your field. It was planted in his. He reminds you that it wasn’t the time or the place to address the boogie man that is racism.
We live in a society that sees differences (sex, race, ethnicity, class, etc.) as a curse instead of a blessing. It's become okay to demean and underestimate someone based on their background. Today tensions are rising rapidly and we must find a way to conquer them without our spirits being tainted.
It's vital that we recognize that Satan is playing a dangerous game in our lives. He wants us to hate each other and isolate ourselves from one another. We must to be open to learning about our differences. We don't always have to agree or understand, but we should all be able to respect each other. God created us all to praise Him and spread His love. In order to do that, we cannot embody hatred.
“Anyone who claims to be in the light but hates a brother or sister is still in the darkness.”—1 John 2:9
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Fiery Plea: A Prayer Asking For Strength And Discipline
Dear God I come to you today asking you to have mercy on my mind. Have mercy on my body. Have mercy on my spirit.
God you know all of the trials I face internally and externally. Lord I'm asking you to rid me of the pain, fear and anger I feel as I walk through the fire that is meant to refine, not consume me. Lord keep me focused on you and your greatness. Don't let Satan reign in my life.
Help me to understand and respect your will for my life. Don't let me forget your incomprehensible awesomeness. Let your Holy Spirit shine through me in the mist of the darkness.
Lord help ALL of Your children fight fear with fearless faith. Help us surround ourselves with positive people and thoughts. Help us not to crumble under society's godless laws. Give us the tools we need to fight to be our best by your standards. Amen.
It's important that we increase our prayer life if we want to have a strong relationship with God. Life can be very difficult and requires that we ask God to keep us centered. If we want to be better, we must consult with the Lord daily.
"Continue steadfastly in prayer, being watchful in it with thanksgiving."-Colossians 4:2
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God you know all of the trials I face internally and externally. Lord I'm asking you to rid me of the pain, fear and anger I feel as I walk through the fire that is meant to refine, not consume me. Lord keep me focused on you and your greatness. Don't let Satan reign in my life.
Help me to understand and respect your will for my life. Don't let me forget your incomprehensible awesomeness. Let your Holy Spirit shine through me in the mist of the darkness.
Lord help ALL of Your children fight fear with fearless faith. Help us surround ourselves with positive people and thoughts. Help us not to crumble under society's godless laws. Give us the tools we need to fight to be our best by your standards. Amen.
It's important that we increase our prayer life if we want to have a strong relationship with God. Life can be very difficult and requires that we ask God to keep us centered. If we want to be better, we must consult with the Lord daily.
"Continue steadfastly in prayer, being watchful in it with thanksgiving."-Colossians 4:2
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NEW POEM: Detestable Reflection
I matter more than you do.
Yeah you heard right, but in case you didn't hear me the first time I'll say it again.
I matter more than you do and I'll prove it.
I matter more because I posses the mighty invaluable faux pride my creators wear in their souls daily.
I matter more because I represent the vile assassination of sculpted cheekbones, sun-kissed skin, silky endless midnight locks and humble loving spirits.
I matter more because I represent proud perpetual barbaric rape, revolting kidnapping and unpalatable slavery of curvy hips, rounds bottoms, double fudge muscles, full lips and indestructible strength.
I matter more because I represent the utmost misappropriation of Yeshua's message of love and light and blasphemed it into putrid lust, greed and hate.
My hues happily show the world my values.
My red stripes represent the liquid scarlet rivers I've slashed into existence for centuries and will gladly slice more to get my way.
My white stripes and stars represent my annihilating cleanup of all undeniable stellar contributions made by shades of coffee cream, walnut, butter pecan, caramel, mocha and dark chocolate.
My blue represents the soulless enforcers that have and will keep my heinous dreams/nightmares alive one bullet at a time.
So you see, I'm more important than you are.
I arrogantly represent the land of the spiritually enslaved and the home of the vomitous cowards.
I am this country’s DETESTABLE REFLECTION.
It’s extremely important that we become aware of how Satan can slip into our ideas, desires and values. He wants us to continue to destroy ourselves and each other over perishable things (including the land in which we live). We must remember that nothing can or will EVER be more valuable than a person’s life.
Yeah you heard right, but in case you didn't hear me the first time I'll say it again.
I matter more than you do and I'll prove it.
I matter more because I posses the mighty invaluable faux pride my creators wear in their souls daily.
I matter more because I represent the vile assassination of sculpted cheekbones, sun-kissed skin, silky endless midnight locks and humble loving spirits.
I matter more because I represent proud perpetual barbaric rape, revolting kidnapping and unpalatable slavery of curvy hips, rounds bottoms, double fudge muscles, full lips and indestructible strength.
I matter more because I represent the utmost misappropriation of Yeshua's message of love and light and blasphemed it into putrid lust, greed and hate.
My hues happily show the world my values.
My red stripes represent the liquid scarlet rivers I've slashed into existence for centuries and will gladly slice more to get my way.
My white stripes and stars represent my annihilating cleanup of all undeniable stellar contributions made by shades of coffee cream, walnut, butter pecan, caramel, mocha and dark chocolate.
My blue represents the soulless enforcers that have and will keep my heinous dreams/nightmares alive one bullet at a time.
So you see, I'm more important than you are.
I arrogantly represent the land of the spiritually enslaved and the home of the vomitous cowards.
I am this country’s DETESTABLE REFLECTION.
It’s extremely important that we become aware of how Satan can slip into our ideas, desires and values. He wants us to continue to destroy ourselves and each other over perishable things (including the land in which we live). We must remember that nothing can or will EVER be more valuable than a person’s life.
NEW POEM: Resplendent Savior
You are the epitome of astounding.
Your excellence can't be contained into one existence, so your brilliance floats in the atmosphere and sprinkles its stellar breeze on everything it touches.
You are so astonishing time obeys your soothing melodic voice with ease.
Your beauty is so vast my mind is unable comprehend even one percent of your dazzling beauty.
Your voice is so soothing; it can calm sinister twenty foot waves and make monstrous hurricanes go into oblivion.
Your creativity is so infinite and stunning that enormous sequoia trees dance in your presence and polychromatic birds sing your praises daily.
My eyes drink in your striking wonder and never get full.
You are so magnificent my awe of you is endless and grows stronger every day.
You are the only being that was never created and can never be matched.
God you are my RESPLENDENT SAVIOR.
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Your excellence can't be contained into one existence, so your brilliance floats in the atmosphere and sprinkles its stellar breeze on everything it touches.
You are so astonishing time obeys your soothing melodic voice with ease.
Your beauty is so vast my mind is unable comprehend even one percent of your dazzling beauty.
Your voice is so soothing; it can calm sinister twenty foot waves and make monstrous hurricanes go into oblivion.
Your creativity is so infinite and stunning that enormous sequoia trees dance in your presence and polychromatic birds sing your praises daily.
My eyes drink in your striking wonder and never get full.
You are so magnificent my awe of you is endless and grows stronger every day.
You are the only being that was never created and can never be matched.
God you are my RESPLENDENT SAVIOR.
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NEW POEM: Groovin’
I never thought I would see you again, but here I am groovin’ to the continuous jazz that is my invaluable happiness.
Every fantasy I have given birth to thanks me and welcomes me home.
My feet no longer touch the ground because the commanding breeze of inspiration has taken hold of me and shown me all of the majestic embryos of ideas I must give birth to daily.
As I continue on my essential journey, letting passionate enthusiasm and immaculate peacefulness guide me, I look down and wave goodbye to the family of damnation (father despair, mother confusion, son pain and daughter restless soul).
I acknowledge them as a part of my past that I refuse to make a part of my present and future.
I’m ecstatic because now I remember what it feels like to be here and experience the liquid warmth of authentic self-love, the silky caress of creativity and the angelic melody of eternal pleasure that fills my body with everything I’ve always wanted.
It feels amazing to be home creating new worlds.
It feels wonderful to sip on the endless waters of spiritual purification.
Just relaxing…
Just being me…
Just GROOVIN’.
It is extremely vital that we remember to embrace our anointed talents. God blessed us with them to inspire and inform others to be their best. He also gave them to us to encourage and entertain ourselves. He gave us priceless freedom (our talents) that no one can take or destroy unless we decide to let the devil penetrate our self-worth. We must fight negative spirits and use our talents properly to praise our Savior as much as possible.
“Each of you should use whatever gift you have received to serve others, as faithful stewards of God’s grace in its various forms.”-1 Peter 4:10-11
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Every fantasy I have given birth to thanks me and welcomes me home.
My feet no longer touch the ground because the commanding breeze of inspiration has taken hold of me and shown me all of the majestic embryos of ideas I must give birth to daily.
As I continue on my essential journey, letting passionate enthusiasm and immaculate peacefulness guide me, I look down and wave goodbye to the family of damnation (father despair, mother confusion, son pain and daughter restless soul).
I acknowledge them as a part of my past that I refuse to make a part of my present and future.
I’m ecstatic because now I remember what it feels like to be here and experience the liquid warmth of authentic self-love, the silky caress of creativity and the angelic melody of eternal pleasure that fills my body with everything I’ve always wanted.
It feels amazing to be home creating new worlds.
It feels wonderful to sip on the endless waters of spiritual purification.
Just relaxing…
Just being me…
Just GROOVIN’.
It is extremely vital that we remember to embrace our anointed talents. God blessed us with them to inspire and inform others to be their best. He also gave them to us to encourage and entertain ourselves. He gave us priceless freedom (our talents) that no one can take or destroy unless we decide to let the devil penetrate our self-worth. We must fight negative spirits and use our talents properly to praise our Savior as much as possible.
“Each of you should use whatever gift you have received to serve others, as faithful stewards of God’s grace in its various forms.”-1 Peter 4:10-11
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NEW POEM: Ethereal Tranquility
My midnight portals absorb astonishing sunrises over serene emerald seas and coffee cream shores during sordid tsunamis that have no alpha or omega.
I am inhaling hypnotic lavender that creates aromatic lucidity in the mist of suffocating fog that refuses to fade into oblivion.
I am tasting the beautifully gentle sweetness of honey devouring my taste buds as bitterness slips past, slides down my throat and tries to reach my safeguarded soul.
I am caressing the silky genteel petals of Thai-Dyed Orchids in the mist of poisonous weeds that are slowly wrapping themselves around my blasé limbs.
I am listening to the melodic harmony of angelic doves professing their faultless love for each other as a multitude of rancorous crows soar my way and screech out bitter indecent messages perpetually.
No matter what trials I face, I will continue to brush my shoulders off and keep strutting along my anointed path.
I am experiencing God's indubitable peace in the mist of my incessant storms.
I am experiencing ETHEREAL TRANQUILITY.
No matter what we face in life, we must fight with God's word and love. Fear, stress and agony cannot abide in the same space as God's excellence.
“I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do all this through him who gives me strength.”—Philippians 4:12-13
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I am inhaling hypnotic lavender that creates aromatic lucidity in the mist of suffocating fog that refuses to fade into oblivion.
I am tasting the beautifully gentle sweetness of honey devouring my taste buds as bitterness slips past, slides down my throat and tries to reach my safeguarded soul.
I am caressing the silky genteel petals of Thai-Dyed Orchids in the mist of poisonous weeds that are slowly wrapping themselves around my blasé limbs.
I am listening to the melodic harmony of angelic doves professing their faultless love for each other as a multitude of rancorous crows soar my way and screech out bitter indecent messages perpetually.
No matter what trials I face, I will continue to brush my shoulders off and keep strutting along my anointed path.
I am experiencing God's indubitable peace in the mist of my incessant storms.
I am experiencing ETHEREAL TRANQUILITY.
No matter what we face in life, we must fight with God's word and love. Fear, stress and agony cannot abide in the same space as God's excellence.
“I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do all this through him who gives me strength.”—Philippians 4:12-13
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NEW POEM: Embracing Girl Power
I'm not just a survivor, I'm a conqueror.
I don't just look in the mirror and examine my "flaws" with self-pity and defeat.
I acknowledge my unique attributes and figure out ways to make them shine like the jewels they always were.
I don't just complain about my job or organization not respecting my talents or contributions.
I keep it moving and create my own avenue of creative freedom and endless success.
When my money is funny and my change is strange I don't pout or get angry.
I look around and assess all of my fabulous blessings with a smile knowing that God has and will provide.
When a guy starts treating me like anything other than the marvelous lady that I am, I don't beg him to change.
I politely put on my sassiest pair of stilettos and kick him to the curb with ease.
I do all of this not just because I can, I do it because I'm a lady.
I won't let trials break me because I was meant to and will annihilate them.
I represent GIRL POWER.
“He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak.”—Isaiah 40:29
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I don't just look in the mirror and examine my "flaws" with self-pity and defeat.
I acknowledge my unique attributes and figure out ways to make them shine like the jewels they always were.
I don't just complain about my job or organization not respecting my talents or contributions.
I keep it moving and create my own avenue of creative freedom and endless success.
When my money is funny and my change is strange I don't pout or get angry.
I look around and assess all of my fabulous blessings with a smile knowing that God has and will provide.
When a guy starts treating me like anything other than the marvelous lady that I am, I don't beg him to change.
I politely put on my sassiest pair of stilettos and kick him to the curb with ease.
I do all of this not just because I can, I do it because I'm a lady.
I won't let trials break me because I was meant to and will annihilate them.
I represent GIRL POWER.
“He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak.”—Isaiah 40:29
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Invisible/Visible Casualty
I’m the little girl who accidentally bumps into you at the mall...
I’m the young boy that everyone says is angry all of the time and doesn’t play well with others…
I’m the odd woman at the sink in the restroom that opens her mouth to speak…but no words cross her lips…
When my ailing eyes desperately meet yours and shriek for help, you snap your neck the other way and continue on with your day that’s chock-full of egocentric delusions trotting through a field of untilled daisies along privileged streams…
As I experience vile injections of relentless anger, merciless power and demonic bondage, you ignore my cries…
I’m the twenty-year-old you see with a gauntlet frame sitting in a corner booth in a diner with two odious men that clearly don’t look like someone that would cherish and nurture my spirit inhaling cheeseburgers, while my ill-fed stomach growls can be heard on Mars…
You put your head down and continue tweeting and Instagramming your brain cells away...
I’m the preteen you pick me up in your Uber at 2:15 in the morning from a roach motel that is so vile the roaches have switched their residence…
You watch me stagger in colossal agony into your car and never ask why someone puberty has barely disturbed…has liquid anguish flooding out her black and blue eyes…
My heart breaks because you won’t save me…
I’m the little child in the airport that has just entered the U.S. with nothing but my rapidly fading memories of my impoverished parents…and a ceaseless stream of mournful tears that lead to my distant home...
You ignore me when I tug on your jacket spewing out words in a language that you can’t understand, and happily dismiss me by removing my petite ravaged hand from your silk clothing…
I know you see me…
You pretend I don’t exist because I don’t fit into your faultless world that is America…
Just remember…your silence isn’t healing or solving anything…
It’s creating bloody volcanic streams of unexpected turmoil that are slithering your way…
I am a victim of human trafficking and I am everyone’s problem.
“Open your mouth, judge righteously, defend the rights of the poor and needy.”—Proverbs 31:9
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I’m the young boy that everyone says is angry all of the time and doesn’t play well with others…
I’m the odd woman at the sink in the restroom that opens her mouth to speak…but no words cross her lips…
When my ailing eyes desperately meet yours and shriek for help, you snap your neck the other way and continue on with your day that’s chock-full of egocentric delusions trotting through a field of untilled daisies along privileged streams…
As I experience vile injections of relentless anger, merciless power and demonic bondage, you ignore my cries…
I’m the twenty-year-old you see with a gauntlet frame sitting in a corner booth in a diner with two odious men that clearly don’t look like someone that would cherish and nurture my spirit inhaling cheeseburgers, while my ill-fed stomach growls can be heard on Mars…
You put your head down and continue tweeting and Instagramming your brain cells away...
I’m the preteen you pick me up in your Uber at 2:15 in the morning from a roach motel that is so vile the roaches have switched their residence…
You watch me stagger in colossal agony into your car and never ask why someone puberty has barely disturbed…has liquid anguish flooding out her black and blue eyes…
My heart breaks because you won’t save me…
I’m the little child in the airport that has just entered the U.S. with nothing but my rapidly fading memories of my impoverished parents…and a ceaseless stream of mournful tears that lead to my distant home...
You ignore me when I tug on your jacket spewing out words in a language that you can’t understand, and happily dismiss me by removing my petite ravaged hand from your silk clothing…
I know you see me…
You pretend I don’t exist because I don’t fit into your faultless world that is America…
Just remember…your silence isn’t healing or solving anything…
It’s creating bloody volcanic streams of unexpected turmoil that are slithering your way…
I am a victim of human trafficking and I am everyone’s problem.
“Open your mouth, judge righteously, defend the rights of the poor and needy.”—Proverbs 31:9
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NEW POEM: Staggering Trickery
Your boldness is intoxicating.
Being shy is against your nature.
You’re so flirtatious.
No matter how much I try to ignore you, you relentlessly make your presence known.
Your intellectual GPS always discovers my whereabouts and you happily engulf yourself into my delicate atmosphere, flooding it with cunning smiles and captivating compliments.
You speak with hypnotic rhythmic vocals that inebriate my intuitive eardrums causing them to two-step to your groove.
Your mellow touch sends silky electricity throughout my limbs, paralyzing my astute reflexes.
You purposely wear cologne that floats off of your polished skin, encircles my nostrils and enters my consciousness with an impassable haze that blurs my perceptive senses.
Your beauty floods my midnight portals with quintessential visions of every astonishing attribute that could possibly steal my breath and successfully put it into submission with minor effort.
Your velvety luscious lips kiss my butter pecan cheek causing my complexion to glow various shades of scarlet as I melt under your commanding spell.
Once you realize you have successfully gotten me to absorb your artful hoodoo, you smile, caress my silky espresso tresses, say, “Until next time,” and walk away with the irresistible swag you’ve always had and will never lose.
Meanwhile, I’ve unknowingly just entertained the kiss of death that is Temptation.
Unfortunately, I won’t realize it until my tranquil composure begins seeping out of my midnight portals forming a murky pool of perpetual pain, undying sorrow and putrid chaos.
I won’t realize it until I begin to experience violent convulsions as my lifestyle yanks the Holy Spirit out of my essence.
I won’t realize it until see Temptation snickering at my demise in the shadows.
I’ve officially fallen victim to the slithering snake that is TEMPTATION.
”When tempted, no one should say, “God is tempting me.” For God cannot be tempted by evil, nor does he tempt anyone; but each person is tempted when they are dragged away by their own evil desire and enticed. Then, after desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and sin, when it is full-grown, gives birth to death. Don’t be deceived, my dear brothers and sisters.”-James 1:13-16
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Being shy is against your nature.
You’re so flirtatious.
No matter how much I try to ignore you, you relentlessly make your presence known.
Your intellectual GPS always discovers my whereabouts and you happily engulf yourself into my delicate atmosphere, flooding it with cunning smiles and captivating compliments.
You speak with hypnotic rhythmic vocals that inebriate my intuitive eardrums causing them to two-step to your groove.
Your mellow touch sends silky electricity throughout my limbs, paralyzing my astute reflexes.
You purposely wear cologne that floats off of your polished skin, encircles my nostrils and enters my consciousness with an impassable haze that blurs my perceptive senses.
Your beauty floods my midnight portals with quintessential visions of every astonishing attribute that could possibly steal my breath and successfully put it into submission with minor effort.
Your velvety luscious lips kiss my butter pecan cheek causing my complexion to glow various shades of scarlet as I melt under your commanding spell.
Once you realize you have successfully gotten me to absorb your artful hoodoo, you smile, caress my silky espresso tresses, say, “Until next time,” and walk away with the irresistible swag you’ve always had and will never lose.
Meanwhile, I’ve unknowingly just entertained the kiss of death that is Temptation.
Unfortunately, I won’t realize it until my tranquil composure begins seeping out of my midnight portals forming a murky pool of perpetual pain, undying sorrow and putrid chaos.
I won’t realize it until I begin to experience violent convulsions as my lifestyle yanks the Holy Spirit out of my essence.
I won’t realize it until see Temptation snickering at my demise in the shadows.
I’ve officially fallen victim to the slithering snake that is TEMPTATION.
”When tempted, no one should say, “God is tempting me.” For God cannot be tempted by evil, nor does he tempt anyone; but each person is tempted when they are dragged away by their own evil desire and enticed. Then, after desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and sin, when it is full-grown, gives birth to death. Don’t be deceived, my dear brothers and sisters.”-James 1:13-16
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NEW POEM: Noxious Revelation
As I examine the state of the world, I see a vast place submerged in atrocious delusions, idiotic stubbornness and incessant selfishness.
As I look at the world, I see horrid storms that rain ceaseless buckets of scarlet rain pouring out of God’s innocent creations and into the streets of mayhem.
As I take a bite of the planet’s mendacious fruit, I taste potent juices of salty malice and bitter insecurity that slowly seep into everyone’s body and ravage their organs to get to their delicate souls.
As I bend down and touch the green grass, my fingertips are slashed and drip deep crimson by weeds disguised as diaphanous flowers that successfully annihilate fields of unrefined tranquility, authentic smiles and commanding hope.
As I listen to the earth’s enthralling melody, I hear agonizing screams of relentless injustice, heedless lust and belligerent greed.
As I inhale the world’s distinct aroma, I smell remnants of tortured ethnic groups’ pain evaporating and raining down on them repeatedly, the poor reeking of despair and Christians’ torture flooding the sky with putrid smog.
As I look at the world, I see negativity flourishing like a virus.
As I look at the world, I see the handy work that is mine.
As I look at the world, I’m so happy to see humans fall for my tricks.
It feels good to see most of the world worship me unknowingly through their actions.
Yes, it feels good to be me, Satan.
“Be sober-minded; be watchful. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour.”—1 Peter 5:8
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As I look at the world, I see horrid storms that rain ceaseless buckets of scarlet rain pouring out of God’s innocent creations and into the streets of mayhem.
As I take a bite of the planet’s mendacious fruit, I taste potent juices of salty malice and bitter insecurity that slowly seep into everyone’s body and ravage their organs to get to their delicate souls.
As I bend down and touch the green grass, my fingertips are slashed and drip deep crimson by weeds disguised as diaphanous flowers that successfully annihilate fields of unrefined tranquility, authentic smiles and commanding hope.
As I listen to the earth’s enthralling melody, I hear agonizing screams of relentless injustice, heedless lust and belligerent greed.
As I inhale the world’s distinct aroma, I smell remnants of tortured ethnic groups’ pain evaporating and raining down on them repeatedly, the poor reeking of despair and Christians’ torture flooding the sky with putrid smog.
As I look at the world, I see negativity flourishing like a virus.
As I look at the world, I see the handy work that is mine.
As I look at the world, I’m so happy to see humans fall for my tricks.
It feels good to see most of the world worship me unknowingly through their actions.
Yes, it feels good to be me, Satan.
“Be sober-minded; be watchful. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour.”—1 Peter 5:8
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NEW POEM: Faithful Examination
Please leave a message after the tone...beeeppp...
Hello there.
I've been trying to reach you for...forever.
I feel like you've been using me.
It seems like I can never get you on the phone when I call you, and the only time you call me is when you need something.
You only call me when your substandard man-child stands you up to waste time with someone else, and you need someone to wipe away your liquid agony.
I reassure you that you are spectacular and that spending an iota of your invaluable energy stressing out over him is beneath the wondrous creature you've always been, but have yet to recognize.
You only call me when your modest bank account evaporates into oblivion, and you desperately need a monetary superhero to swoop in and clean up the infantile plight you created by indulging in a lifestyle your present and future will never allow you to embody organically.
You only call me when your psyche melts into a sea of murky despair, innumerable woes and melancholy disposition, and you need someone to cleanse your aura of relentless gloom by caressing your essence with luscious kisses of confidence and inspiration.
You only call me when your brilliant dreams of a vast superior career shatter into pieces of dissipated time, efficacious failures and indubitable shame.
The sad part is, the love I have for you has never been reciprocated no matter what I do for you.
I mean sure, you say thank you and you tell me how amazing I am and that you “love” me, but those are only words.
You haven’t lived up to any of them.
Lucky for you, I don’t hold grudges.
I guess all I’m trying to say is that I really love you and I would love to hear from you.
By the way, this is Yeshua, but most people call me Jesus.
“Behold, I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come into him and eat with him, and he with me.”-Revelation 3:20
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Hello there.
I've been trying to reach you for...forever.
I feel like you've been using me.
It seems like I can never get you on the phone when I call you, and the only time you call me is when you need something.
You only call me when your substandard man-child stands you up to waste time with someone else, and you need someone to wipe away your liquid agony.
I reassure you that you are spectacular and that spending an iota of your invaluable energy stressing out over him is beneath the wondrous creature you've always been, but have yet to recognize.
You only call me when your modest bank account evaporates into oblivion, and you desperately need a monetary superhero to swoop in and clean up the infantile plight you created by indulging in a lifestyle your present and future will never allow you to embody organically.
You only call me when your psyche melts into a sea of murky despair, innumerable woes and melancholy disposition, and you need someone to cleanse your aura of relentless gloom by caressing your essence with luscious kisses of confidence and inspiration.
You only call me when your brilliant dreams of a vast superior career shatter into pieces of dissipated time, efficacious failures and indubitable shame.
The sad part is, the love I have for you has never been reciprocated no matter what I do for you.
I mean sure, you say thank you and you tell me how amazing I am and that you “love” me, but those are only words.
You haven’t lived up to any of them.
Lucky for you, I don’t hold grudges.
I guess all I’m trying to say is that I really love you and I would love to hear from you.
By the way, this is Yeshua, but most people call me Jesus.
“Behold, I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come into him and eat with him, and he with me.”-Revelation 3:20
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NEW POEM: Lascivious Recklessness
Her insecurity is ripping her to shreds.
Instead of repelling it with the Holy Spirit's pure love and confidence He offers her daily, she continuously absorbs excruciating lashes to her ego that send her running in a lascivious marathon of darkness.
With every meter she runs, she perspires droplets of smooth composure, Godly wisdom and invaluable knowledge that cascade down her temple and chest forming puddles of murky brokenness and polluted frustration.
As her breath thickens, she violently inhales dense regret and exhales an outflow sorrow as she reminisces about her numerous sexual indiscretions.
She recalls entertaining male beasts that aren't worthy of being called gentlemen on a daily basis.
She recalls settling for drive-thrus, artery clogging super-sized fries and watery shakes instead of table clothes, five courses and a stroll along the riverfront.
She recalls answering to 2 a.m. booties calls instead of endearing love notes, flirty texts and "just because" phone calls.
She recalls subjecting herself to pleasureless injections that penetrate her womb with liquid wrath that slithers its way to her soul and destroys its purity instead of sensual kisses and enthralling caresses that are enveloped in love and respect for her virtue.
With each mile she runs, her soul portals are flooded with a tsunami of tears that begin blurring her vision into blindness.
As she wipes away dispirited translucent streams from her flushed cheeks, she surrenders to sin-induced shame, defeat and sorrow instead of God's forgiveness.
As she continues running in the marathon of her brokenness, she's oblivious to Christ running alongside her just waiting for her to take His hand of instantaneous redemption and quintessential restoration.
She is blindly wallowing in LASCIVIOUS RECKLESSNESS.
It's imperative that we recognize the spirit of insecurity in our lives. It comes in numerous forms to wreak havoc on our minds, bodies and spirits. But no matter how we allow it to taint our lives, we must remember that God is always ready to heal us and forgive us for our sins. All we have to do is ask.
“If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.”-1 John 1:9
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Instead of repelling it with the Holy Spirit's pure love and confidence He offers her daily, she continuously absorbs excruciating lashes to her ego that send her running in a lascivious marathon of darkness.
With every meter she runs, she perspires droplets of smooth composure, Godly wisdom and invaluable knowledge that cascade down her temple and chest forming puddles of murky brokenness and polluted frustration.
As her breath thickens, she violently inhales dense regret and exhales an outflow sorrow as she reminisces about her numerous sexual indiscretions.
She recalls entertaining male beasts that aren't worthy of being called gentlemen on a daily basis.
She recalls settling for drive-thrus, artery clogging super-sized fries and watery shakes instead of table clothes, five courses and a stroll along the riverfront.
She recalls answering to 2 a.m. booties calls instead of endearing love notes, flirty texts and "just because" phone calls.
She recalls subjecting herself to pleasureless injections that penetrate her womb with liquid wrath that slithers its way to her soul and destroys its purity instead of sensual kisses and enthralling caresses that are enveloped in love and respect for her virtue.
With each mile she runs, her soul portals are flooded with a tsunami of tears that begin blurring her vision into blindness.
As she wipes away dispirited translucent streams from her flushed cheeks, she surrenders to sin-induced shame, defeat and sorrow instead of God's forgiveness.
As she continues running in the marathon of her brokenness, she's oblivious to Christ running alongside her just waiting for her to take His hand of instantaneous redemption and quintessential restoration.
She is blindly wallowing in LASCIVIOUS RECKLESSNESS.
It's imperative that we recognize the spirit of insecurity in our lives. It comes in numerous forms to wreak havoc on our minds, bodies and spirits. But no matter how we allow it to taint our lives, we must remember that God is always ready to heal us and forgive us for our sins. All we have to do is ask.
“If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.”-1 John 1:9
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NEW POEM: Mystical Realization
I've just had an aha moment.
I realized that my insecurities have nothing to do with God's ability to perform outstanding everythings in my life.
I realized that my insecurities are totally 500% created by me allowing Satan to plant corrosive seeds into my spirit.
These seeds are hidden in a beautiful duplicitous bouquet of noxious crimson roses that I willingly accepted with open arms.
As I happily inhaled their deceptive fumes, each lethal seed flowed into the nostrils of my mind and found its way into my perpetually fragile soul.
Every time I admired the roses, the seeds of my demise burrowed themselves into my essence and slowly formed pleasant/agonizing weeds of unabating insecurity, despair and anger.
As each of them flourished, my once astonishing faith in Yeshua started to suffocate due to the unrelenting grasp of the toxic weeds.
The more these weeds claimed their territory, the more my once inextinguishable motivation cascaded into oblivion.
But there is one good thing about this situation.
I know exactly how to decimate these weeds of everlasting fraudulence.
I know how to call God's name and watch them briskly shrivel up and vanish into the nothingness they were always meant to be.
I proudly embrace my MYSTICAL REALIZATION.
“Submit yourselves, then, to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.”—James 4:7
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I realized that my insecurities have nothing to do with God's ability to perform outstanding everythings in my life.
I realized that my insecurities are totally 500% created by me allowing Satan to plant corrosive seeds into my spirit.
These seeds are hidden in a beautiful duplicitous bouquet of noxious crimson roses that I willingly accepted with open arms.
As I happily inhaled their deceptive fumes, each lethal seed flowed into the nostrils of my mind and found its way into my perpetually fragile soul.
Every time I admired the roses, the seeds of my demise burrowed themselves into my essence and slowly formed pleasant/agonizing weeds of unabating insecurity, despair and anger.
As each of them flourished, my once astonishing faith in Yeshua started to suffocate due to the unrelenting grasp of the toxic weeds.
The more these weeds claimed their territory, the more my once inextinguishable motivation cascaded into oblivion.
But there is one good thing about this situation.
I know exactly how to decimate these weeds of everlasting fraudulence.
I know how to call God's name and watch them briskly shrivel up and vanish into the nothingness they were always meant to be.
I proudly embrace my MYSTICAL REALIZATION.
“Submit yourselves, then, to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.”—James 4:7
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NEW POEM: Internal Melancholy
As I laugh at my friends' corny jokes, my heart aches with unexplainable grief that I'm determined to ignore.
As I smile and wave hello to a petite elderly lady walking her black and golden morkie down the street, my soul drowns in a sea of endless pain and mystifying hopelessness.
As I salsa my feet into an aching frenzy during dance class, poisonous confusion drips out of my mind and into my spirit.
The unfunny thing is that no one sees it.
They don't see how cataclysmic fear and deleterious confusion wrap themselves around my fragile sanity and crush it into endless oblivion.
They don't hear my bruised soul screech in incomprehensible agony as it receives excruciating blow after blow of vigorous disappointment.
As I look at myself in the mirror, I don't see the remarkably vibrant, strong and positive person everyone else sees.
I see the real me.
Someone that is slowly crumbling…
Someone that is filled with gloom…
Someone that is experiencing INTERNAL MELANCHOLY.
It's vital that we recognize the difference between experiencing occasional sadness and actual depression. We must realize that depression is a spirit—a Satanic spirit. We must recognize that negative thoughts and feelings are only meant to destroy us. We must fight back with bold faith by aggressively praying (talking and listening to God), meditating, confiding with seasoned saints and going to spiritual counseling (if necessary). God wants us to experience peace, not turmoil. Don’t let Satan win.
“The righteous cry, and the LORD heareth, and delivereth them out of all their troubles.”—Psalm 34:17
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As I smile and wave hello to a petite elderly lady walking her black and golden morkie down the street, my soul drowns in a sea of endless pain and mystifying hopelessness.
As I salsa my feet into an aching frenzy during dance class, poisonous confusion drips out of my mind and into my spirit.
The unfunny thing is that no one sees it.
They don't see how cataclysmic fear and deleterious confusion wrap themselves around my fragile sanity and crush it into endless oblivion.
They don't hear my bruised soul screech in incomprehensible agony as it receives excruciating blow after blow of vigorous disappointment.
As I look at myself in the mirror, I don't see the remarkably vibrant, strong and positive person everyone else sees.
I see the real me.
Someone that is slowly crumbling…
Someone that is filled with gloom…
Someone that is experiencing INTERNAL MELANCHOLY.
It's vital that we recognize the difference between experiencing occasional sadness and actual depression. We must realize that depression is a spirit—a Satanic spirit. We must recognize that negative thoughts and feelings are only meant to destroy us. We must fight back with bold faith by aggressively praying (talking and listening to God), meditating, confiding with seasoned saints and going to spiritual counseling (if necessary). God wants us to experience peace, not turmoil. Don’t let Satan win.
“The righteous cry, and the LORD heareth, and delivereth them out of all their troubles.”—Psalm 34:17
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NEW POEM: Veracious Love?
All I have to say is he loves me!
Why can't you see that?
It may not be the kind of love you're used to, but trust me its love.
Look at me!
Can't you see his love is all over me?
The way he showers my body with perpetual rough/gentle touches that remain on my body for seven days is love.
The way he profusely raises his sexy baritone voice just to let me know I left a wrinkle in his shirt is love.
The way he shows concern about every man that glances my way by ruggedly/gracefully slamming my head against the wall is love.
The way he makes sure I stick to my diet by harshly/delicately inserting his fingers down my throat to purge my body of any harmful calories is love.
The way he wipes away scarlet tears from my eyes and nose everyday is love.
See!
My man loves me!
He loves me so much, he paid for my funeral.
Too bad I didn't get a chance to LOVE him first.
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Why can't you see that?
It may not be the kind of love you're used to, but trust me its love.
Look at me!
Can't you see his love is all over me?
The way he showers my body with perpetual rough/gentle touches that remain on my body for seven days is love.
The way he profusely raises his sexy baritone voice just to let me know I left a wrinkle in his shirt is love.
The way he shows concern about every man that glances my way by ruggedly/gracefully slamming my head against the wall is love.
The way he makes sure I stick to my diet by harshly/delicately inserting his fingers down my throat to purge my body of any harmful calories is love.
The way he wipes away scarlet tears from my eyes and nose everyday is love.
See!
My man loves me!
He loves me so much, he paid for my funeral.
Too bad I didn't get a chance to LOVE him first.
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NEW POEM: CHRISTmas Epiphany
My aura swirls and dances to the joy of thinking about receiving glamorous gifts that will further enhance my fashion savvy wardrobe.
I smile with endless elation when I think about attending numerous festive parties and elaborate dinners with family and friends.
My taste buds drip sugary happiness as I think of delectable sugar cookies, decadent Oreo truffles and sumptuous apple caramel cookies.
I'm happily consumed with all things Christmas until I realize one thing is missing—Christ.
I've forgotten that Our Father saw fit to bless us with His son over two thousand years ago.
I've forgotten that this holiday is ALL about Him—not me.
I humbly beg the Lord to forgive me for not engulfing a hundred percent of myself to praising and acknowledging the most astonishing gift I will ever receive—His son.
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I smile with endless elation when I think about attending numerous festive parties and elaborate dinners with family and friends.
My taste buds drip sugary happiness as I think of delectable sugar cookies, decadent Oreo truffles and sumptuous apple caramel cookies.
I'm happily consumed with all things Christmas until I realize one thing is missing—Christ.
I've forgotten that Our Father saw fit to bless us with His son over two thousand years ago.
I've forgotten that this holiday is ALL about Him—not me.
I humbly beg the Lord to forgive me for not engulfing a hundred percent of myself to praising and acknowledging the most astonishing gift I will ever receive—His son.
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NEW POEM: Neglected Savior
As people prepare their extensive Christmas gift lists and zoom from store to store purchasing gifts that assassinate their bank accounts...I'm neglected...
As people gleefully make endearing champagne toasts to each other that won't mean anything five minutes later...I'm neglected...
As people get cozy around their fireplaces with Santa Claus shaped mugs overflowing with hot chocolate, homemade whipped cream and salted caramel drizzle to watch a plethora of "Christmas" movies that never mention my name...I'm neglected...
As people gather up their most delectable recipes for seafood gumbo, Creole mac and cheese and crawfish stuffed mirlitons and hold themselves hostage in their kitchens for hours and days...I'm neglected...
As churches slowly begin to replace the significance of my birth with candy canes, chocolate mythical characters and turkey dinners...I'm neglected...
Each year millions of people say they are celebrating the Christmas season.
There's just one problem.
They don't celebrate me.
So please stop saying Merry Christmas.
Next time say Merry Mas
Because I, CHRIST, am in no way a part of most people's Christmas.
The real question is, am I in yours?
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As people gleefully make endearing champagne toasts to each other that won't mean anything five minutes later...I'm neglected...
As people get cozy around their fireplaces with Santa Claus shaped mugs overflowing with hot chocolate, homemade whipped cream and salted caramel drizzle to watch a plethora of "Christmas" movies that never mention my name...I'm neglected...
As people gather up their most delectable recipes for seafood gumbo, Creole mac and cheese and crawfish stuffed mirlitons and hold themselves hostage in their kitchens for hours and days...I'm neglected...
As churches slowly begin to replace the significance of my birth with candy canes, chocolate mythical characters and turkey dinners...I'm neglected...
Each year millions of people say they are celebrating the Christmas season.
There's just one problem.
They don't celebrate me.
So please stop saying Merry Christmas.
Next time say Merry Mas
Because I, CHRIST, am in no way a part of most people's Christmas.
The real question is, am I in yours?
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NEW POEM: SINductive Infidelity
I have a confession.
I love you but I've been cheating on you with someone you know very well.
Someone you loathe more than anything that's on this planet and beyond.
God I love you...but I'm cheating on you with...with sin.
Whenever I think you're busy performing remarkable and indescribable miracles for someone else, I tip toe out of the back door and fall into the arms of the beautiful poison I can't resist.
His kisses are so hypnotizing that I ignore the venomous honey that drips from his lips and slips into the mouth of my soul.
His embrace is so intoxicating that I ignore his snake-like grasp that is breaking everything that is holy inside my once precious body.
His conniving rapturous words are so enthralling that I convince myself that his sexy deceit could never harm me...
But right before I decide to divorce you, I remember the unconditional love you have for me.
I remember how your majestic words cascade from my ears to my spirit and leave traces of peace, wisdom and knowledge.
I remember how your astounding smile melts unrelenting pain, stress and chaos effortlessly.
I remember how your flawless honesty and stringent guidance only exist to purge me of my abysmal deficiencies.
I remember that seductive sin can never compete with the artless relationship you and I have.
I realize that my SINductive Infidelity must come to an end.
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I love you but I've been cheating on you with someone you know very well.
Someone you loathe more than anything that's on this planet and beyond.
God I love you...but I'm cheating on you with...with sin.
Whenever I think you're busy performing remarkable and indescribable miracles for someone else, I tip toe out of the back door and fall into the arms of the beautiful poison I can't resist.
His kisses are so hypnotizing that I ignore the venomous honey that drips from his lips and slips into the mouth of my soul.
His embrace is so intoxicating that I ignore his snake-like grasp that is breaking everything that is holy inside my once precious body.
His conniving rapturous words are so enthralling that I convince myself that his sexy deceit could never harm me...
But right before I decide to divorce you, I remember the unconditional love you have for me.
I remember how your majestic words cascade from my ears to my spirit and leave traces of peace, wisdom and knowledge.
I remember how your astounding smile melts unrelenting pain, stress and chaos effortlessly.
I remember how your flawless honesty and stringent guidance only exist to purge me of my abysmal deficiencies.
I remember that seductive sin can never compete with the artless relationship you and I have.
I realize that my SINductive Infidelity must come to an end.
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NEW POEM: Thankful Contemplations
As I pour macaroni noodles into a boiling pot of water, I smile because I'm thankful.
I'm thankful to be able to inhale pure laughter, genuine love and priceless conversation.
I'm the thankful for phenomenal relationships, eternal support and immense love.
I'm thankful to receive timeless wisdom from ladies that possess marvelous strength, class and virtue.
I'm grateful to be blessed with the mind to be able to stand up for myself against treacherous people and vile situations.
I'm grateful to be able to have the tenacity to continue embracing transcendent courage and incessant faith.
I'm grateful to be able to absorb God's calling for my life with spiritual meekness, surprising discipline and endless boldness.
As I inhale a mixture of sweet and savory delightfulness, I will continue to experience blissful contemplations...
Tranquil contemplations…
THANKFUL CONTEMPLATIONS.
“Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.”—1 Thessalonians 5:18
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I'm thankful to be able to inhale pure laughter, genuine love and priceless conversation.
I'm the thankful for phenomenal relationships, eternal support and immense love.
I'm thankful to receive timeless wisdom from ladies that possess marvelous strength, class and virtue.
I'm grateful to be blessed with the mind to be able to stand up for myself against treacherous people and vile situations.
I'm grateful to be able to have the tenacity to continue embracing transcendent courage and incessant faith.
I'm grateful to be able to absorb God's calling for my life with spiritual meekness, surprising discipline and endless boldness.
As I inhale a mixture of sweet and savory delightfulness, I will continue to experience blissful contemplations...
Tranquil contemplations…
THANKFUL CONTEMPLATIONS.
“Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.”—1 Thessalonians 5:18
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NEW POEM: Insecurity Abolisher
I'm sorry to inform you that your services are no longer needed.
I no longer require the endless hours of toxic chaos that you embed into my spirit.
I no longer require your cold kisses that seep into my skin sending chills of putrid anxiety rushing into my psyche.
I no longer require your asphyxiating hugs that strangle my self-love into oblivion.
I no longer require your poisonous caresses that smear my innocent joy with unnecessary internal sadness.
I no longer require spirit-crushing handshakes that have broken every form of confidence I once possessed.
You see, I don't need you.
Nor do I want you.
You will no longer cripple the spectacular potential God has given me.
I'm wonderful because God created me and He never makes trash.
So poof, be gone.
There's no place for you in my mind, body or spirit.
God runs my life and He's my INSECURITY ABOLISHER.
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I no longer require the endless hours of toxic chaos that you embed into my spirit.
I no longer require your cold kisses that seep into my skin sending chills of putrid anxiety rushing into my psyche.
I no longer require your asphyxiating hugs that strangle my self-love into oblivion.
I no longer require your poisonous caresses that smear my innocent joy with unnecessary internal sadness.
I no longer require spirit-crushing handshakes that have broken every form of confidence I once possessed.
You see, I don't need you.
Nor do I want you.
You will no longer cripple the spectacular potential God has given me.
I'm wonderful because God created me and He never makes trash.
So poof, be gone.
There's no place for you in my mind, body or spirit.
God runs my life and He's my INSECURITY ABOLISHER.
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NEW POEM: Spiritual Typhoon
I'm drowning.
I'm drowning in the unforgiving sea that is life.
Every time I recover from being bashed in the face by waves of insecurity and financial turmoil, a rogue wave of family mayhem smacks my composure into oblivion and crashes me into rocks of unexplainable despair.
The more I try to inhale positive spiritual air, calamity tries to strangle me.
Explosive sheets of rain called failure cascade down my face and flawlessly mix with tears of endless sorrow.
As my spirit collapses into the defeat position in waters of bottomless anguish, I remember God's awesome power.
The more I meditate on His impeccable grace and mercy, clouds of misery vanish without a trace.
The more I listen to His melodic voice assure me that He will never let me down if I keep my eyes on Him, the smaller waves of insanity become.
The more I rebuke Satan's clever tricks, the more the flood waters of disarray recede.
No matter what kind of storms blow into my life, I will never be dismantled by them.
God has my back and he will always be my protection during a SPIRITUAL TYPHOON.
“Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.”-James 1:2-4
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I'm drowning in the unforgiving sea that is life.
Every time I recover from being bashed in the face by waves of insecurity and financial turmoil, a rogue wave of family mayhem smacks my composure into oblivion and crashes me into rocks of unexplainable despair.
The more I try to inhale positive spiritual air, calamity tries to strangle me.
Explosive sheets of rain called failure cascade down my face and flawlessly mix with tears of endless sorrow.
As my spirit collapses into the defeat position in waters of bottomless anguish, I remember God's awesome power.
The more I meditate on His impeccable grace and mercy, clouds of misery vanish without a trace.
The more I listen to His melodic voice assure me that He will never let me down if I keep my eyes on Him, the smaller waves of insanity become.
The more I rebuke Satan's clever tricks, the more the flood waters of disarray recede.
No matter what kind of storms blow into my life, I will never be dismantled by them.
God has my back and he will always be my protection during a SPIRITUAL TYPHOON.
“Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.”-James 1:2-4
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NEW POEM: Jovial Solitude
As I inhale streams of tranquil thoughts that dance on waters of innocent bliss...I am experiencing serenity.
As I collapse into pillows of silence with barely there jazz in the background that tickles my ears...I am experiencing serenity.
As my midnight portals glance at leaves shimmying in the wind to a rhythm only they know...I am experiencing serenity.
As my spiritual tongue tastes endless creativity that's sweeter than nectar...I am experiencing serenity.
I am experiencing serenity because I know it's a blessing to be able to enjoy your own company.
I am God's creation.
And He created me to be just as valuable as an individual, as I am in a couple or in a collective group.
I proudly embrace JOVIAL SOLITUDE.
It's extremely vital that we learn how to enjoy our own company. Being alone allows us to discover our interests, standards, talents and desires without anyone's perspective clouding our judgment. It's also the perfect time for us to bond with the Lord and ask Him what we can do to be our best selves.
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As I collapse into pillows of silence with barely there jazz in the background that tickles my ears...I am experiencing serenity.
As my midnight portals glance at leaves shimmying in the wind to a rhythm only they know...I am experiencing serenity.
As my spiritual tongue tastes endless creativity that's sweeter than nectar...I am experiencing serenity.
I am experiencing serenity because I know it's a blessing to be able to enjoy your own company.
I am God's creation.
And He created me to be just as valuable as an individual, as I am in a couple or in a collective group.
I proudly embrace JOVIAL SOLITUDE.
It's extremely vital that we learn how to enjoy our own company. Being alone allows us to discover our interests, standards, talents and desires without anyone's perspective clouding our judgment. It's also the perfect time for us to bond with the Lord and ask Him what we can do to be our best selves.
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Are You Happy Being His Side Piece?
It’s 1:30 in the morning, and you’re wearing a new dress that cascades down your curves, your fresh blowout has your hair dancing with every move and your sky-high stilettos make your calves look like they’ve been created by a sculptor. Everything is perfect, except for the fact that you’ve been pacing the floor and going out of your mind because you’ve been waiting for your “man” to come over. Finally your phone rings and as soon as you answer, he whispers that he can’t get away tonight because his girl/lady/wife is around. He promises he’ll try to spend time with you when he can get away. You know that you may not see him for another seven to ten days, but you tell him it’s okay. Before you hang up, he tells you he loves you and you tell him the same even though you know in your spirit that he REALLY doesn’t love you and he will never leave his main woman. So why are you happy being his side piece?
As females, we tend to settle for less than we are worth on a regular basis from our jobs, family, friends and especially in romantic relationships. We always think we can change someone. We confuse someone’s potential with the delusional ideas of what we would like them to be. We waste numerous amounts of minutes, hours, days, weeks, months and sometimes years TRYING to fix and mold a guy into what we think we want instead of respecting the fact that he’s not the right guy for us and he will never make us happy.
We spend all this time on someone else’s man because we are so afraid that we will end up alone. And of course, in a woman’s mind that’s the worst thing that could happen because why would we want to spend time getting to know our fabulous selves? Why would we want to get to know our strengths and weaknesses and really figure out what type of guy we deserve? Why would we want to wait on God to send us the best man possible? A man that will embody everything our spirits yearned for but didn’t know they needed.
It’s important that we realize that we deserve a man with a mind, body and spirit that only belongs to us. We deserve to be the only one in his mind when he wakes up in the morning and goes to sleep at night. We deserve to show off our love to the world and not have to creep around a hotel or our homes all of the time. We deserve to be recognized as his girl/lady/wife. We deserve more than just being his side piece. We deserve the best.
“Like a gold ring in a pig’s snout is a beautiful woman without discretion.” Proverbs 11:22
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As females, we tend to settle for less than we are worth on a regular basis from our jobs, family, friends and especially in romantic relationships. We always think we can change someone. We confuse someone’s potential with the delusional ideas of what we would like them to be. We waste numerous amounts of minutes, hours, days, weeks, months and sometimes years TRYING to fix and mold a guy into what we think we want instead of respecting the fact that he’s not the right guy for us and he will never make us happy.
We spend all this time on someone else’s man because we are so afraid that we will end up alone. And of course, in a woman’s mind that’s the worst thing that could happen because why would we want to spend time getting to know our fabulous selves? Why would we want to get to know our strengths and weaknesses and really figure out what type of guy we deserve? Why would we want to wait on God to send us the best man possible? A man that will embody everything our spirits yearned for but didn’t know they needed.
It’s important that we realize that we deserve a man with a mind, body and spirit that only belongs to us. We deserve to be the only one in his mind when he wakes up in the morning and goes to sleep at night. We deserve to show off our love to the world and not have to creep around a hotel or our homes all of the time. We deserve to be recognized as his girl/lady/wife. We deserve more than just being his side piece. We deserve the best.
“Like a gold ring in a pig’s snout is a beautiful woman without discretion.” Proverbs 11:22
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NEW POEM: Unexpected Brokenness
You never see it coming.
It's the crafty mysterious thing that goes bump in the night.
It's the inescapable monster in our closets we know is probably there but refuse to acknowledge.
It hovers over us contemplating ways to dismantle our fragile sanity.
It's unexpected brokenness.
Once it strangles our spirits with ropes of fading finances, putrid relationships and decaying health, our compromised psyches are challenged to fight unrelenting waves of depression, fear and anger.
We are forced to reevaluate our spiritual health statuses to see if we can withstand the tsunami of trials that has submerged our short lived tranquility.
We are now challenged by our unforgiving challenges to see if we can practice what we preach.
Life is filled with an abundance of grim occurrences that never ask.
They boldly explode into our lives without knocking.
We only control one thing.
Will we let them enrich our spirits or destroy them?
Either way, UNEXPECTED BROKENNESS is on its way.
It's important that we remain prayerful and embody God's word in and out of seasons of brokenness. If we mediate more on God than our situations, we will be able to experience peace in the middle of our storms.
“Preach the word; be urgent in season, out of season; reprove, rebuke, exhort, with all longsuffering and teaching.—2 Timothy 4:2
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It's the crafty mysterious thing that goes bump in the night.
It's the inescapable monster in our closets we know is probably there but refuse to acknowledge.
It hovers over us contemplating ways to dismantle our fragile sanity.
It's unexpected brokenness.
Once it strangles our spirits with ropes of fading finances, putrid relationships and decaying health, our compromised psyches are challenged to fight unrelenting waves of depression, fear and anger.
We are forced to reevaluate our spiritual health statuses to see if we can withstand the tsunami of trials that has submerged our short lived tranquility.
We are now challenged by our unforgiving challenges to see if we can practice what we preach.
Life is filled with an abundance of grim occurrences that never ask.
They boldly explode into our lives without knocking.
We only control one thing.
Will we let them enrich our spirits or destroy them?
Either way, UNEXPECTED BROKENNESS is on its way.
It's important that we remain prayerful and embody God's word in and out of seasons of brokenness. If we mediate more on God than our situations, we will be able to experience peace in the middle of our storms.
“Preach the word; be urgent in season, out of season; reprove, rebuke, exhort, with all longsuffering and teaching.—2 Timothy 4:2
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NEW POEM: Medicine 4 My Soul
You are the best medicine for my soul.
When I feel like I'm about to suffocate by ropes of depression, fear, anger and confusion that hold the most precious part of me that is my soul, you release me with your knife of power and peace.
When I feel sooo good about everything and I can't vocalize it, you allow me to breathe my natural highs into the atmosphere and share them with whoever I wish.
When I have a question about something, but I don't want an answer to or opinion about it, you allow me to expose the puzzle pieces that are missing, but don't want to be found.
When I have these wondrous dreams of what it is like to receive the gift of walking on petals of eternal smiles and being showered with serenity from the soul of an angelic creature, you allow me to take these dreams and show my glorious listener just how emotional and strong I feel about experiencing true love.
By taking a dose of you, I am now able to be as strong, as sincere, and as intimate as I was created to be.
You are my freedom from all the negativity life has to offer.
You are the passion I use to develop whatever I need to do so I won't lose my sanity.
You are MEDICINE FOR MY SOUL.
It’s extremely vital that we all discover and embrace our talents and purpose—our freedom. Whatever your freedom may be, (public speaking, painting, mentoring, writing, making someone laugh, etc.) use it boldly to spread God’s love, light and keep you grounded at all times. Creative writing and motivational speaking are mine. What’s yours?
“The Lord will fulfill his purpose for me; your steadfast love, O Lord, endures forever. Do not forsake the work of your hands.”—Psalm 138:8
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When I feel like I'm about to suffocate by ropes of depression, fear, anger and confusion that hold the most precious part of me that is my soul, you release me with your knife of power and peace.
When I feel sooo good about everything and I can't vocalize it, you allow me to breathe my natural highs into the atmosphere and share them with whoever I wish.
When I have a question about something, but I don't want an answer to or opinion about it, you allow me to expose the puzzle pieces that are missing, but don't want to be found.
When I have these wondrous dreams of what it is like to receive the gift of walking on petals of eternal smiles and being showered with serenity from the soul of an angelic creature, you allow me to take these dreams and show my glorious listener just how emotional and strong I feel about experiencing true love.
By taking a dose of you, I am now able to be as strong, as sincere, and as intimate as I was created to be.
You are my freedom from all the negativity life has to offer.
You are the passion I use to develop whatever I need to do so I won't lose my sanity.
You are MEDICINE FOR MY SOUL.
It’s extremely vital that we all discover and embrace our talents and purpose—our freedom. Whatever your freedom may be, (public speaking, painting, mentoring, writing, making someone laugh, etc.) use it boldly to spread God’s love, light and keep you grounded at all times. Creative writing and motivational speaking are mine. What’s yours?
“The Lord will fulfill his purpose for me; your steadfast love, O Lord, endures forever. Do not forsake the work of your hands.”—Psalm 138:8
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NEW POEM: Malevolent Crusher
I don't do hatred.
It's beneath me.
My awesomeness is allergic to unnecessary nonsense.
I refuse to absorb anyone's unhinged insecurity that wreaks havoc on everything and everyone he or she is around.
I refuse to entertain anyone's shallow quarrels about my race, ethnicity or sex.
I refuse to eat anyone's wrathful words or actions and allow them to slaughter my essence.
I refuse to embody the lethal fear anyone tries to evoke on me via obtuse ideologies.
I refuse to absorb anything that's plagued with spiritual darkness.
I don't do hatred.
It's beneath me.
I will never be okay with chaos.
I will proudly continue to be a fighter against it.
I will always be a MALEVOLENT CRUSHER.
“Anyone who claims to be in the light but hates a brother or sister is still in the darkness.”—1 John 2:9
We are living in a world submerged in vile hatred. It is extremely imperative that we don't feed hatred with hatred, ignore it, or make excuses for it. God created all of us equally. He never approves of racism, sexism or hatred of any kind. After all, we did all come from Adam and Eve.
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It's beneath me.
My awesomeness is allergic to unnecessary nonsense.
I refuse to absorb anyone's unhinged insecurity that wreaks havoc on everything and everyone he or she is around.
I refuse to entertain anyone's shallow quarrels about my race, ethnicity or sex.
I refuse to eat anyone's wrathful words or actions and allow them to slaughter my essence.
I refuse to embody the lethal fear anyone tries to evoke on me via obtuse ideologies.
I refuse to absorb anything that's plagued with spiritual darkness.
I don't do hatred.
It's beneath me.
I will never be okay with chaos.
I will proudly continue to be a fighter against it.
I will always be a MALEVOLENT CRUSHER.
“Anyone who claims to be in the light but hates a brother or sister is still in the darkness.”—1 John 2:9
We are living in a world submerged in vile hatred. It is extremely imperative that we don't feed hatred with hatred, ignore it, or make excuses for it. God created all of us equally. He never approves of racism, sexism or hatred of any kind. After all, we did all come from Adam and Eve.
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NEW POEM: Majestic Devotee
I'm not just a survivor, I'm a conqueror.
I don't just look in the mirror and examine my "flaws" with self-pity and defeat.
I acknowledge my unique attributes and figure out ways to make them shine like the jewels they always were.
I don't just complain about my job or organization not respecting my talents or contributions.
I keep it moving and create my own golden avenue of creative freedom and endless success.
When my money is funny and my change is strange I don't pout or get angry.
I look around and assess all of my priceless blessings with a smile knowing that God has and will provide all of the scrumptious mental, physical and spiritual delicacies my essence can sustain.
When a guy starts treating me like anything other than the marvelous lady that I am, I don't beg him to change.
I politely put on my sassiest pair of no nonsense stilettos with the too blessed to be stressed straps and kick him to the curb with ease.
I do all of this not just because I can, I do it because I'm a lady—a daughter of the risen savior.
I won't let trials break me because I was meant to and will annihilate them.
Christ is my king and I’m in His royal court of feisty unwavering believers.
I am His MAJESTIC DEVOTEE.
“Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the Lord, she shall be praised.”—Proverbs 31:30
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I don't just look in the mirror and examine my "flaws" with self-pity and defeat.
I acknowledge my unique attributes and figure out ways to make them shine like the jewels they always were.
I don't just complain about my job or organization not respecting my talents or contributions.
I keep it moving and create my own golden avenue of creative freedom and endless success.
When my money is funny and my change is strange I don't pout or get angry.
I look around and assess all of my priceless blessings with a smile knowing that God has and will provide all of the scrumptious mental, physical and spiritual delicacies my essence can sustain.
When a guy starts treating me like anything other than the marvelous lady that I am, I don't beg him to change.
I politely put on my sassiest pair of no nonsense stilettos with the too blessed to be stressed straps and kick him to the curb with ease.
I do all of this not just because I can, I do it because I'm a lady—a daughter of the risen savior.
I won't let trials break me because I was meant to and will annihilate them.
Christ is my king and I’m in His royal court of feisty unwavering believers.
I am His MAJESTIC DEVOTEE.
“Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the Lord, she shall be praised.”—Proverbs 31:30
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Four Ways Being A Hater Is Wrecking Your Spiritual Flow
Many of us have experienced the pathetic, unruly and putrid words and actions of a hater (some of us are even guilty of being the hater). And while none of us bask in the annoyance of a hater's actions, we must remember to not ingest that type of behavior. Entertaining that type of energy can be just as harmful as creating it. Here are four ways being a hater can interrupt your spiritual growth.
Gives birth to low self-esteem
A hater falls victim to envy, which gives birth to insecurity whenever he/she feels someone is accomplishing something he/she can't.
Stops you from nurturing your strengths
A hater can sometimes spend so much energy on trying to figure out clever ways to decimate someone's character/relationship/accomplishment that he/she ignores or never recognizes his/her own talents or purpose.
Wastes tons of time trying to belittle someone's destiny
A hater allows Satan to pollute his/her mind with faux ways to tarnish a person's blessings instead of realizing that no one can demolish God's plans.
Breeds immaturity
A hater's spiritual side-eye hinders him/her from growing into the smart, wise and fabulous person God created him/her to be.
“For where jealousy and selfish ambition exist, there will be disorder and every vile practice.”—James 3:16
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Gives birth to low self-esteem
A hater falls victim to envy, which gives birth to insecurity whenever he/she feels someone is accomplishing something he/she can't.
Stops you from nurturing your strengths
A hater can sometimes spend so much energy on trying to figure out clever ways to decimate someone's character/relationship/accomplishment that he/she ignores or never recognizes his/her own talents or purpose.
Wastes tons of time trying to belittle someone's destiny
A hater allows Satan to pollute his/her mind with faux ways to tarnish a person's blessings instead of realizing that no one can demolish God's plans.
Breeds immaturity
A hater's spiritual side-eye hinders him/her from growing into the smart, wise and fabulous person God created him/her to be.
“For where jealousy and selfish ambition exist, there will be disorder and every vile practice.”—James 3:16
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NEW POEM: Faith Analysis
I am a faithful Christian.
My faith is so strong trouble shrinks in my presence and seeks therapy for my fiery glare.
Nothing can shake my faith.
At least that's the lie I'd like to believe.
Sometimes when clever fear slithers into my psyche, it causes my stoic composure to melt into a sea of despair.
Sometimes when anger corrodes my intricate essence, my butter pecan complexion receives a rush of audacious crimson.
Sometimes when sadness washes over me with melancholy raindrops, my spirit becomes a stream of almost successes and a plethora of I wishes.
I am a faithful Christian.
Which means my faith will never be perfect.
It will be challenged daily and sometimes it will become weak.
That's why the Holy Spirit has my back.
He is my shield and He never lets me down.
Being a Christian doesn't exempt us from experiencing putrid emotions and agonizing events. Being a Christian means that our faith will be tested beyond every breaking point we can posses. Having faith means we use our pain as an opportunity to grow, not crumble.
“Beloved, do not be surprised at the fiery trial when it comes upon you to test you, as though something strange were happening to you. But rejoice insofar as you share Christ's sufferings, that you may also rejoice and be glad when his glory is revealed.”—1 Peter 4:12-13
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My faith is so strong trouble shrinks in my presence and seeks therapy for my fiery glare.
Nothing can shake my faith.
At least that's the lie I'd like to believe.
Sometimes when clever fear slithers into my psyche, it causes my stoic composure to melt into a sea of despair.
Sometimes when anger corrodes my intricate essence, my butter pecan complexion receives a rush of audacious crimson.
Sometimes when sadness washes over me with melancholy raindrops, my spirit becomes a stream of almost successes and a plethora of I wishes.
I am a faithful Christian.
Which means my faith will never be perfect.
It will be challenged daily and sometimes it will become weak.
That's why the Holy Spirit has my back.
He is my shield and He never lets me down.
Being a Christian doesn't exempt us from experiencing putrid emotions and agonizing events. Being a Christian means that our faith will be tested beyond every breaking point we can posses. Having faith means we use our pain as an opportunity to grow, not crumble.
“Beloved, do not be surprised at the fiery trial when it comes upon you to test you, as though something strange were happening to you. But rejoice insofar as you share Christ's sufferings, that you may also rejoice and be glad when his glory is revealed.”—1 Peter 4:12-13
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Do You Like Pretty Lies Or Ugly Truths?
You slam your bedroom closet door as you reminisce on your mother's core-shaking words. You tell yourself that you should have never asked her what she thought about you constantly getting fired from incredible jobs and losing boyfriends left and right. As you plop down onto your animal print chaise and start randomly flipping from TV station to TV station, your conversation begins playing on your cerebral TV.
When you ask your mother why she thinks you have lost four jobs and three boyfriends in nine months, she tells you that it's because you have a super stank attitude and that you like to start arguments all of the time. Her sharp response shakes your composure and spirit. You can't believe she would say such a harsh thing like that (even if it's true). So what if you lash out at people from time to time for no reason. So what if you ignore people when they are talking to you. It's not like those people are so perfect. As you start watching a romantic comedy, you tell yourself that it doesn't matter what your mom says. At least your friends think you're a wonderful person.
It's becoming more popular for us to become victims of delighting ourselves with sweet honey lies instead of accepting the sometimes bitter and sour truths about ourselves. We live in a society that happily rebels against what's right and glorifies what's wrong with ease. And as a result, we live in a world that is rapidly spiraling into an abyss of hatred, lawlessness and perpetual chaos.
It's extremely important that we humble ourselves to be able to positively receive constructive criticism. When someone loves us, it's their duty to keep us in check in a loving manner. God always blesses us with people in our lives that will be honest with us whether we like it or not. It's our job to receive them and their message with maturity and class.
“If you listen to constructive criticism, you will be at home among the wise.”—Proverbs 15:31
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When you ask your mother why she thinks you have lost four jobs and three boyfriends in nine months, she tells you that it's because you have a super stank attitude and that you like to start arguments all of the time. Her sharp response shakes your composure and spirit. You can't believe she would say such a harsh thing like that (even if it's true). So what if you lash out at people from time to time for no reason. So what if you ignore people when they are talking to you. It's not like those people are so perfect. As you start watching a romantic comedy, you tell yourself that it doesn't matter what your mom says. At least your friends think you're a wonderful person.
It's becoming more popular for us to become victims of delighting ourselves with sweet honey lies instead of accepting the sometimes bitter and sour truths about ourselves. We live in a society that happily rebels against what's right and glorifies what's wrong with ease. And as a result, we live in a world that is rapidly spiraling into an abyss of hatred, lawlessness and perpetual chaos.
It's extremely important that we humble ourselves to be able to positively receive constructive criticism. When someone loves us, it's their duty to keep us in check in a loving manner. God always blesses us with people in our lives that will be honest with us whether we like it or not. It's our job to receive them and their message with maturity and class.
“If you listen to constructive criticism, you will be at home among the wise.”—Proverbs 15:31
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Do You Throw Shade At Your Friends’ Blessings?
You and your three best friends are having a splendid time relaxing at a spa retreat for the week. As you all hangout by the natural stone and waterfall poolside, your friend Ilana joyfully tells you all that her public relations firm just landed its first six-figure contract and she will clear about $250,000 this year. Kammie and Toni are ecstatic and immediately hug her and give her a high five. And you purposely keep your head down reading your magazine and “casually” mention that $250,000 still isn’t going to pay off her Ivy League student loans and other debts.
Everyone ignores your sly remark and continues sharing news about their accomplishments. Kammie tells you all that she and her father have finally reconnected and are building a wonderful relationship. You instantly suck your teeth and ask her if he’s still a crackhead and still stealing from people. Toni immediately snaps at you and tells you to stop being so negative and hating on everyone’s blessings. You say a soft insincere sorry and remain silent as they all continue talking about how great God has blessed them. Deep down you’re living a very unhappy life because you feel that you deserve to be blessed more than your friends because you live a “better” life than they do. You are suffering from poisonous envy.
We live in a society that tells us we that we are entitled to have and accomplish certain things. We are constantly told that over the top cars, homes, bank accounts, wardrobes and fame are what make us valuable and happy. We are taught how to be endless takers instead of selfless givers.
It’s vital that we remember that we can’t always control what happens to us (the family we were born into, unexpected illnesses, job loss, etc.). We don’t control who God decides to bless or curse (whether they “deserve” it or not). But we can control how we react to all of it. If we want to live the best life possible, we must learn to appreciate the journey God has chosen for us. If we want to live a life of peace and blessings, we must admire and not hate on someone else’s journey.
“A tranquil heart gives life to the flesh, but envy makes the bones rot.”—Proverbs 14:30
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Everyone ignores your sly remark and continues sharing news about their accomplishments. Kammie tells you all that she and her father have finally reconnected and are building a wonderful relationship. You instantly suck your teeth and ask her if he’s still a crackhead and still stealing from people. Toni immediately snaps at you and tells you to stop being so negative and hating on everyone’s blessings. You say a soft insincere sorry and remain silent as they all continue talking about how great God has blessed them. Deep down you’re living a very unhappy life because you feel that you deserve to be blessed more than your friends because you live a “better” life than they do. You are suffering from poisonous envy.
We live in a society that tells us we that we are entitled to have and accomplish certain things. We are constantly told that over the top cars, homes, bank accounts, wardrobes and fame are what make us valuable and happy. We are taught how to be endless takers instead of selfless givers.
It’s vital that we remember that we can’t always control what happens to us (the family we were born into, unexpected illnesses, job loss, etc.). We don’t control who God decides to bless or curse (whether they “deserve” it or not). But we can control how we react to all of it. If we want to live the best life possible, we must learn to appreciate the journey God has chosen for us. If we want to live a life of peace and blessings, we must admire and not hate on someone else’s journey.
“A tranquil heart gives life to the flesh, but envy makes the bones rot.”—Proverbs 14:30
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Are You Okay With Being A Weak Woman?
As you go to the ATM machine to get out $20.00 to give to your coworker Sy'rai for your supervisor's birthday present, your chest tightens as the phrase "insufficient funds" dances across the screen. You close your eyes, swallow your disappointment and walk away trying to think of another lie you can tell Sy'rai about why you don't have any money. As you walk into the elevator and press the number for your office floor, you realize that you've been in perpetual turmoil (especially financially) since you got married.
This is the fifth month in a row that your husband has cleaned out you all's joint bank account (your only account). You knew he wasn't ambitious and didn't have a high paying job, but you never thought he would happily quit his job (without talking to you first) and decide to stay at home while you worked your fingers to the bones. He never considered how you would pay the house bills, your student loans, his "champagne taste" and his $25,000 worth of debt (that he forgot to mention before you married him).
Unfortunately, you won't do anything about it. You're too afraid to lose him—a big pile of nothingness. You've purposely chosen to live a life of tumultuous insanity instead of peaceful and fulfilling singleness. You've chosen to allow pieces of your soul to dissipate daily as you force yourself to remain in a damned relationship.
It's crucial that we recognize our weaknesses. At one point or another, most of us are or have settled for a boy instead of a gentleman. We must remember that God created us to be in relationships that will enhance, not destroy us. If we want to be in a healthy relationship, we must realize that our strengths and values are qualities that should be revered not silenced.
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This is the fifth month in a row that your husband has cleaned out you all's joint bank account (your only account). You knew he wasn't ambitious and didn't have a high paying job, but you never thought he would happily quit his job (without talking to you first) and decide to stay at home while you worked your fingers to the bones. He never considered how you would pay the house bills, your student loans, his "champagne taste" and his $25,000 worth of debt (that he forgot to mention before you married him).
Unfortunately, you won't do anything about it. You're too afraid to lose him—a big pile of nothingness. You've purposely chosen to live a life of tumultuous insanity instead of peaceful and fulfilling singleness. You've chosen to allow pieces of your soul to dissipate daily as you force yourself to remain in a damned relationship.
It's crucial that we recognize our weaknesses. At one point or another, most of us are or have settled for a boy instead of a gentleman. We must remember that God created us to be in relationships that will enhance, not destroy us. If we want to be in a healthy relationship, we must realize that our strengths and values are qualities that should be revered not silenced.
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NEW POEM: Sinful Reflections
As I look into the mirror of life, I see a world submerged in chaotic ideologies that the masses inhale daily and execute without a hitch.
I see violence infecting community after community after poverty and hopelessness have ravaged everyone's souls.
I see little girls embodying the lie that their precious bodies have a price point and are their only way to achieve love and wealth.
I see sex being reduced to a heinous act instead of being reverenced as the exquisite blessing between a husband and wife it's meant to be.
I see anger enveloping in the eyes of many, causing them to bask in vileness with ease.
I see jealousy corroding minds causing corrupt thoughts and sleazy allegations.
As I look out into the mirror of life, I see all of the sins everyone is committing.
Unfortunately, I haven't taken the time to look into my own mirror and see my SINFUL REFLECTIONS.
It's extremely important that we remember to recognize our flaws. We can't constantly focus on what everybody else is doing wrong and neglect our spiritual well-being. If we want to change the world, we must start with ourselves first.
“You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye.”—Matthew 7:5
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I see violence infecting community after community after poverty and hopelessness have ravaged everyone's souls.
I see little girls embodying the lie that their precious bodies have a price point and are their only way to achieve love and wealth.
I see sex being reduced to a heinous act instead of being reverenced as the exquisite blessing between a husband and wife it's meant to be.
I see anger enveloping in the eyes of many, causing them to bask in vileness with ease.
I see jealousy corroding minds causing corrupt thoughts and sleazy allegations.
As I look out into the mirror of life, I see all of the sins everyone is committing.
Unfortunately, I haven't taken the time to look into my own mirror and see my SINFUL REFLECTIONS.
It's extremely important that we remember to recognize our flaws. We can't constantly focus on what everybody else is doing wrong and neglect our spiritual well-being. If we want to change the world, we must start with ourselves first.
“You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye.”—Matthew 7:5
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NEW POEM: Contagious Deceiver
There's a disease spreader on the loose.
He's destroying everything he touches.
He's coming onto every job and wreaking havoc by poisoning coworkers against one another and planting insecurity that spreads and chokes work harmony to its death.
He slithers his way into happy homes creating endless confusion, putrid infidelity and toxic fury.
He seeps into the churches with his cunning lies, wrathful backbiting and worldly antics.
He slips into our minds contaminating them with rancid ideologies that send us on destructive roads of lethal insecurity, twisted restlessness and depraved self-image.
This disease spreader has dedicated his entire life to slashing our mental, physical and spiritual wellness.
This disease spreader’s thirst will never be quenched until he annihilates us all.
His name is Satan.
And the only way to avoid death is by taking the Holy Spirit vaccine.
Have you taken your shot today?
“Be sober-minded; be watchful. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour. Resist him, firm in your faith, knowing that the same kinds of suffering are being experienced by your brotherhood throughout the world.”—1 Peter 5:8-9
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He's destroying everything he touches.
He's coming onto every job and wreaking havoc by poisoning coworkers against one another and planting insecurity that spreads and chokes work harmony to its death.
He slithers his way into happy homes creating endless confusion, putrid infidelity and toxic fury.
He seeps into the churches with his cunning lies, wrathful backbiting and worldly antics.
He slips into our minds contaminating them with rancid ideologies that send us on destructive roads of lethal insecurity, twisted restlessness and depraved self-image.
This disease spreader has dedicated his entire life to slashing our mental, physical and spiritual wellness.
This disease spreader’s thirst will never be quenched until he annihilates us all.
His name is Satan.
And the only way to avoid death is by taking the Holy Spirit vaccine.
Have you taken your shot today?
“Be sober-minded; be watchful. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour. Resist him, firm in your faith, knowing that the same kinds of suffering are being experienced by your brotherhood throughout the world.”—1 Peter 5:8-9
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Do You Constantly Meditate On Toxic Thoughts?
As you work on your latest writing assignment and take a sip of your cinnamon roll latte, your ex-boyfriend's sister walks up to your yellow umbrella-covered table and says hello. As soon as you look at her, your chest slowly squeezes the peace out of your spirit. You immediately remind her of all the shady things she's said and done to you as if it all happened to you yesterday (but it was really over three years ago). As she tries to genuinely apologize to you, you totally dismiss her warm words and overpower them with venomous wrath. As she walks away in defeat, you perspire anger and frustration. And unfortunately, this is not a unique occurrence for you.
Every day you wake up, your mind is submerged in putrid thoughts of all of the negative things people have said and done to you recently and in the past. You have become so consumed with pain, worry, anger and confusion that you miss all of the pure moments that are all around you. You have become a voluntary slave to the happiness killer that is gloom.
It's extremely easy and popular to focus on all of the things that are "wrong" in our lives. Most of us consume ourselves with ways to annihilate what or who we don't like instead of embracing the blessings and strengths we have. Adopting this type of ideology will definitely kill our spirits.
It's crucial that we are aware of the types of thoughts we entertain. If we allow foul thoughts to penetrate our minds, they will seep into our souls and become vile actions. If we want to experience peace and happiness, we must allow the Holy Spirit to envelope our spirits. He is the only one that can cleanse our thoughts.
“For as he thinketh in his heart, so is he: Eat and drink, saith he to thee; but his heart is not with thee.”—Proverbs 23:7
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Every day you wake up, your mind is submerged in putrid thoughts of all of the negative things people have said and done to you recently and in the past. You have become so consumed with pain, worry, anger and confusion that you miss all of the pure moments that are all around you. You have become a voluntary slave to the happiness killer that is gloom.
It's extremely easy and popular to focus on all of the things that are "wrong" in our lives. Most of us consume ourselves with ways to annihilate what or who we don't like instead of embracing the blessings and strengths we have. Adopting this type of ideology will definitely kill our spirits.
It's crucial that we are aware of the types of thoughts we entertain. If we allow foul thoughts to penetrate our minds, they will seep into our souls and become vile actions. If we want to experience peace and happiness, we must allow the Holy Spirit to envelope our spirits. He is the only one that can cleanse our thoughts.
“For as he thinketh in his heart, so is he: Eat and drink, saith he to thee; but his heart is not with thee.”—Proverbs 23:7
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NEW POEM: Astounding Savior
We've never met in person, but His endless love and magnificent spirit envelops my soul like rushing water filled with tranquility and eternal glee.
I've never been able to shake His hand, but I experience His compelling spiritual hugs that demolish ravenous fear and replenish my aura with vivid serenity and timeless wisdom.
I never had a chance to hear Him speak in person, but He serenades me daily with His calm voice that blesses me with invaluable truths and flawless encouragement.
I've never tasted any of His food, but I savor His potent comfort and stern guidance like honey dripping from the tree of life.
You see, I've never met my Savior in person before, but I experience His excellence daily.
The minute He died on the cross, was the moment His blessed me with a chance to experience His wondrous power.
The minute He died on the cross, He became my ASTOUNDING SAVIOR.
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I've never been able to shake His hand, but I experience His compelling spiritual hugs that demolish ravenous fear and replenish my aura with vivid serenity and timeless wisdom.
I never had a chance to hear Him speak in person, but He serenades me daily with His calm voice that blesses me with invaluable truths and flawless encouragement.
I've never tasted any of His food, but I savor His potent comfort and stern guidance like honey dripping from the tree of life.
You see, I've never met my Savior in person before, but I experience His excellence daily.
The minute He died on the cross, was the moment His blessed me with a chance to experience His wondrous power.
The minute He died on the cross, He became my ASTOUNDING SAVIOR.
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NEW POEM: Cowardice Silence
As endless chaos erupts around me…I remain silent.
As venomous lies slice through pure truths…I remain silent.
As delicate innocent spirits are broken daily by malicious attacks…I remain silent.
I remain silent because I don't want any trouble.
I want to be liked.
When coworkers plot against each other to move up the perishable corporate ladder...I remain silent.
When the world's divisive ideology becomes more present in church activities than Christ, I reluctantly participate anyway and remain silent.
When friends pollute their precious bodies and spirits with lethal ideas and demeaning actions, I swallow my conscience and remain silent.
When family members nurture vile feelings towards each other and want me to absorb the same foul mentality, I don't rock the sinking boat—I remain silent.
I remain silent because I don't want to cause any trouble.
I want to be liked.
I'm afraid to tell people what they're doing is wrong.
I don't want to ever be on anyone's bad side.
Too bad I'm not afraid of being on the Lord's bad side.
I've become a willing victim of COWARDICE SILENCE.
It's extremely important that we never become consumed with what the "world" says is acceptable. When we focus on what people think, we dilute our moral compasses. There is only one opinion that matters—the Lord's. He is the only one that can save or damn our lives.
“So whoever knows the right thing to do and fails to do it, for him it is sin.” James 4:17
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As venomous lies slice through pure truths…I remain silent.
As delicate innocent spirits are broken daily by malicious attacks…I remain silent.
I remain silent because I don't want any trouble.
I want to be liked.
When coworkers plot against each other to move up the perishable corporate ladder...I remain silent.
When the world's divisive ideology becomes more present in church activities than Christ, I reluctantly participate anyway and remain silent.
When friends pollute their precious bodies and spirits with lethal ideas and demeaning actions, I swallow my conscience and remain silent.
When family members nurture vile feelings towards each other and want me to absorb the same foul mentality, I don't rock the sinking boat—I remain silent.
I remain silent because I don't want to cause any trouble.
I want to be liked.
I'm afraid to tell people what they're doing is wrong.
I don't want to ever be on anyone's bad side.
Too bad I'm not afraid of being on the Lord's bad side.
I've become a willing victim of COWARDICE SILENCE.
It's extremely important that we never become consumed with what the "world" says is acceptable. When we focus on what people think, we dilute our moral compasses. There is only one opinion that matters—the Lord's. He is the only one that can save or damn our lives.
“So whoever knows the right thing to do and fails to do it, for him it is sin.” James 4:17
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How Do You Quench Your Spiritual Thirst?
It's no secret that you love receiving attention. Every time you're at school, work, and with family and friends, you make sure you're the loudest and craziest in the room. You will never be caught sitting quietly in the corner.
Every day you make it your mission to post on all of your social media channels as much as possible. You also troll the internet looking for reality show auditions. And you're not doing it because of your line of work or because it's a good way to network. You do it because you want to have as many followers as possible. You do it because you're dying for attention.
It's becoming more common for many of us to seem super thirsty for attention as a result of social media. Unfortunately, social media isn’t the problem. It's only an outlet that allows us to reveal to the masses how parched for attention we are. This thirst is only a symptom of the real problem many of search to quench. We lack peace.
It's critical that we are mindful of the real reasons we long to do or achieve certain things. We must remember that physical actions are a direct result of our spiritual health. Our constant desire for love, fame, acceptance and money is our way of trying to fill our spiritual glasses. It's impossible to quench our spiritual thirst with non-spiritual things. The Holy Spirit is the only one who can bless us with everlasting water that will never leave us thirsty.
“But whoever drinks of the water that I will give him will never be thirsty again. The water that I will give him will become in him a spring of water welling up to eternal life.”—John 4:14
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Every day you make it your mission to post on all of your social media channels as much as possible. You also troll the internet looking for reality show auditions. And you're not doing it because of your line of work or because it's a good way to network. You do it because you want to have as many followers as possible. You do it because you're dying for attention.
It's becoming more common for many of us to seem super thirsty for attention as a result of social media. Unfortunately, social media isn’t the problem. It's only an outlet that allows us to reveal to the masses how parched for attention we are. This thirst is only a symptom of the real problem many of search to quench. We lack peace.
It's critical that we are mindful of the real reasons we long to do or achieve certain things. We must remember that physical actions are a direct result of our spiritual health. Our constant desire for love, fame, acceptance and money is our way of trying to fill our spiritual glasses. It's impossible to quench our spiritual thirst with non-spiritual things. The Holy Spirit is the only one who can bless us with everlasting water that will never leave us thirsty.
“But whoever drinks of the water that I will give him will never be thirsty again. The water that I will give him will become in him a spring of water welling up to eternal life.”—John 4:14
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Are You A Serial Chameleon?
You've just come from your church's sister circle book club and tea event. You all reviewed a book that addressed the complexities of dating as a Christian woman. Everyone shared their dating experiences (the good, the bad and sometimes hilariously creepy). Your circle leader Kara assured all of you single ladies that settling for less than God's best (a gentleman) should never be an option. Your circle secretary Tia added that we should always be ourselves no matter what is popular or what people think we should be.
You happily smiled and nodded. You totally agreed with everything your sister circle said. That is until your best friend Dana called and told you that she was on her way to come get you so you all could go to a strip club and get your drink on.
You gleefully say okay and quickly take off your floral mid-length a-line dress and change into a black sheer v-neck tank top and a gold bandeau mini skirt that will easily expose your precious virtue as soon as you sit down. Within five minutes, you've gone from a lady to a woman of the night. As you add more shadow to your eyelids to create a smokey eye, you are oblivious to the fact that you constantly conform yourself to fit in with whoever you are with at the time. You are a serial chameleon.
It is becoming more and more acceptable for people (especially girls and women) to conform to what is “popular” in society. Sometimes we become so consumed with trying to please others that we forget who we are or never realize who we are meant to be. We have become enslaved with the idea of the “cool” us.
It’s extremely vital that we recognize when we are not being ourselves. We must be mindful of the ideologies we absorb and the people we entertain. Every experience we have affects how our spirits are molded. God created all of us to be beautiful unique ladies. We should always embrace who we are (quirks included) and who God called us to be—strong individuals.
“Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.”—Romans 12:22
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You happily smiled and nodded. You totally agreed with everything your sister circle said. That is until your best friend Dana called and told you that she was on her way to come get you so you all could go to a strip club and get your drink on.
You gleefully say okay and quickly take off your floral mid-length a-line dress and change into a black sheer v-neck tank top and a gold bandeau mini skirt that will easily expose your precious virtue as soon as you sit down. Within five minutes, you've gone from a lady to a woman of the night. As you add more shadow to your eyelids to create a smokey eye, you are oblivious to the fact that you constantly conform yourself to fit in with whoever you are with at the time. You are a serial chameleon.
It is becoming more and more acceptable for people (especially girls and women) to conform to what is “popular” in society. Sometimes we become so consumed with trying to please others that we forget who we are or never realize who we are meant to be. We have become enslaved with the idea of the “cool” us.
It’s extremely vital that we recognize when we are not being ourselves. We must be mindful of the ideologies we absorb and the people we entertain. Every experience we have affects how our spirits are molded. God created all of us to be beautiful unique ladies. We should always embrace who we are (quirks included) and who God called us to be—strong individuals.
“Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.”—Romans 12:22
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NEW POEM: Pristine Splendor
I'm guilty.
I'm guilty of not taking the time to experience and appreciate all of the exquisite things and joyous moments God has created.
I will no longer allow fleeting stress and tawdry priorities to pollute the blessings that quietly wait patiently to be recognized.
I've been enlightened.
As I step outside and I close my eyes and encounter the wind dancing around me and caressing my butter pecan skin, I'm experiencing a blessing.
As I watch two squirrels dash across the yard and into a tree, I'm experiencing a blessing.
As I listen to Coltrane convince me that I'm submerged in a sentimental mood, I'm experiencing a blessing.
As I walk into almost any restaurant in New Orleans and become hypnotized by the intoxicating scent of boiled crawfish, I'm experiencing a blessing.
As I indulge in a spoon full of pralines and cream ice cream drizzled in caramel that slowly drowns my taste buds in delight, I'm experiencing a blessing.
You see blessings aren't always the big things in life.
They are the small pure moments in life.
They are PRISTINE SPLENDOR.
It's important that we remember that every positive thing we encounter is a blessing. Sometimes we are so busy chasing the high of a "big" blessing, we forget about all of the small ones that sustain us on a regular basis. We must remember that every blessing is important—big and small.
“I will give thanks to you, LORD, with all my heart; I will tell of all your wonderful deeds.”—Psalm 9:1
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I'm guilty of not taking the time to experience and appreciate all of the exquisite things and joyous moments God has created.
I will no longer allow fleeting stress and tawdry priorities to pollute the blessings that quietly wait patiently to be recognized.
I've been enlightened.
As I step outside and I close my eyes and encounter the wind dancing around me and caressing my butter pecan skin, I'm experiencing a blessing.
As I watch two squirrels dash across the yard and into a tree, I'm experiencing a blessing.
As I listen to Coltrane convince me that I'm submerged in a sentimental mood, I'm experiencing a blessing.
As I walk into almost any restaurant in New Orleans and become hypnotized by the intoxicating scent of boiled crawfish, I'm experiencing a blessing.
As I indulge in a spoon full of pralines and cream ice cream drizzled in caramel that slowly drowns my taste buds in delight, I'm experiencing a blessing.
You see blessings aren't always the big things in life.
They are the small pure moments in life.
They are PRISTINE SPLENDOR.
It's important that we remember that every positive thing we encounter is a blessing. Sometimes we are so busy chasing the high of a "big" blessing, we forget about all of the small ones that sustain us on a regular basis. We must remember that every blessing is important—big and small.
“I will give thanks to you, LORD, with all my heart; I will tell of all your wonderful deeds.”—Psalm 9:1
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NEW POEM: Impenetrable Faith
You think you can crush my essence into endless fragments of perpetual agony, fraught insanity and decomposed bitterness?
You think you can stomp on my pride with unexpected robust chaos, monstrous cerebral illness and monetary snags?
Well you're wrong Satan.
You will not conquer me.
I'm fighting back with IMPENETRABLE FAITH.
You see the Holy Spirit lives inside me and He runs the show.
His comfort melts my pain and worries into rivers of angelic peace and warm love.
He guards my delicate soundness with His colossal shield of magnificence and zeal.
He obstructs your words from contaminating my tranquility by demolishing them with His rhythmic words that possess the power of a thousand seas.
You see the Holy Spirit lives inside me and He runs the show.
I will continue to strut through the fires of life wearing fireproof stilettos made of spiritual confidence.
I will continue to fight back with IMPENETRABLE FAITH.
It’s extremely important that we remember that hardships are a part of life. God will allow us to be in certain situations to increase our spiritual muscles. We must release our troubles to God and allow Him to guide us through them. He will never fail us.
“But he said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.’ Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.”—2 Corinthians 12:9
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You think you can stomp on my pride with unexpected robust chaos, monstrous cerebral illness and monetary snags?
Well you're wrong Satan.
You will not conquer me.
I'm fighting back with IMPENETRABLE FAITH.
You see the Holy Spirit lives inside me and He runs the show.
His comfort melts my pain and worries into rivers of angelic peace and warm love.
He guards my delicate soundness with His colossal shield of magnificence and zeal.
He obstructs your words from contaminating my tranquility by demolishing them with His rhythmic words that possess the power of a thousand seas.
You see the Holy Spirit lives inside me and He runs the show.
I will continue to strut through the fires of life wearing fireproof stilettos made of spiritual confidence.
I will continue to fight back with IMPENETRABLE FAITH.
It’s extremely important that we remember that hardships are a part of life. God will allow us to be in certain situations to increase our spiritual muscles. We must release our troubles to God and allow Him to guide us through them. He will never fail us.
“But he said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.’ Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.”—2 Corinthians 12:9
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NEW POEM: Unique Valentine
This year my Valentine is going to be someone extra special.
My Valentine is someone I've known my whole life.
My Valentine has been with me when I encountered acute grueling lows, pure baffling highs and every creepy crazy thing in between.
My Valentine knows what can make me experience unruly indubitable laughter, unintentional blushing and an incessant waterfall of tears.
This year my Valentine is one of the few people that actually know the real me.
My unique Valentine is me.
Yes this year I consciously choose to tell myself how much I appreciate...me.
I will not engulf myself in the putrid poisons that are low self-esteem, depression and loneliness.
I will not consume myself with thoughts of addictive desperation or ceaseless worry.
I will not accept facile defeat or a dismal outcome.
God created me to be better than that.
I'm His child and I have every intention of acting like it.
After all, if I don't love myself, why should anyone else?
“Whoever gets sense loves his own soul; he who keeps understanding will discover good.”—Proverbs 19:8
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My Valentine is someone I've known my whole life.
My Valentine has been with me when I encountered acute grueling lows, pure baffling highs and every creepy crazy thing in between.
My Valentine knows what can make me experience unruly indubitable laughter, unintentional blushing and an incessant waterfall of tears.
This year my Valentine is one of the few people that actually know the real me.
My unique Valentine is me.
Yes this year I consciously choose to tell myself how much I appreciate...me.
I will not engulf myself in the putrid poisons that are low self-esteem, depression and loneliness.
I will not consume myself with thoughts of addictive desperation or ceaseless worry.
I will not accept facile defeat or a dismal outcome.
God created me to be better than that.
I'm His child and I have every intention of acting like it.
After all, if I don't love myself, why should anyone else?
“Whoever gets sense loves his own soul; he who keeps understanding will discover good.”—Proverbs 19:8
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How Far Are You Willing To Go To Get A Man?
Two months ago you made it your mission to be in a committed relationship that would lead to marriage within the next six months. You've signed up for numerous dating websites, Apps and you have attended almost every single dating mixer on the planet. Three weeks ago all of your hard work paid off because you finally met the man of your dreams.
His name is Dante. He's an architect, homeowner and he's crazy about you. There's just one problem—he's engaged to someone else. You know about his fiancée, but you're determined to change his mind and become his lady in waiting. You're purposely ignoring your moral values to achieve what you feel is the ultimate accomplishment because you're tired of being the "sad" single girl everyone thinks is going to live in a house full of cats. You're going to prove everyone wrong even if you have to do a little wrong to accomplish it.
It's no secret that the pressure for most women to get married and have children is almost as intense as it was fifty years ago. If most of us make it to thirty without being married (or at least in a promising relationship), we will start being bombarded with a myriad of questions by family, friends and strangers. Sometimes this pressure can overwhelm us and lead us down a path of insecurity and settling for less than we deserve.
It's imperative that we remember that settling for anything less than honesty, love, respect and loyalty is not of God—it's of Satan. God doesn't want us to scheme our way to being in a relationship He never ordained. He wants us to focus on Him and in return He will provide us with everything and everyone we need to have in our lives.
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His name is Dante. He's an architect, homeowner and he's crazy about you. There's just one problem—he's engaged to someone else. You know about his fiancée, but you're determined to change his mind and become his lady in waiting. You're purposely ignoring your moral values to achieve what you feel is the ultimate accomplishment because you're tired of being the "sad" single girl everyone thinks is going to live in a house full of cats. You're going to prove everyone wrong even if you have to do a little wrong to accomplish it.
It's no secret that the pressure for most women to get married and have children is almost as intense as it was fifty years ago. If most of us make it to thirty without being married (or at least in a promising relationship), we will start being bombarded with a myriad of questions by family, friends and strangers. Sometimes this pressure can overwhelm us and lead us down a path of insecurity and settling for less than we deserve.
It's imperative that we remember that settling for anything less than honesty, love, respect and loyalty is not of God—it's of Satan. God doesn't want us to scheme our way to being in a relationship He never ordained. He wants us to focus on Him and in return He will provide us with everything and everyone we need to have in our lives.
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Do You Fight Hatred With Hatred Or With Wisdom?
Last Friday as you watched the 45th President of the United States take office, tears of sorrow streamed down your face and your broken heart slid down into your stomach that was drowning in agony. You couldn't believe that a man that effortlessly spewed hate every time he opened his mouth is now going to be the president of a country, your country, that claims to be a place of love, equal opportunity and freedom. Now you dread going to work because most of your coworkers voted for him and are all too happy to talk about it.
As soon as you walk into your job, you can hear many of them joyously talk about the inauguration and how they are ecstatic that President Obama is out of office. As they continue to degrade President Obama by calling him everything except for the N-word, you immediately walk toward them. You've officially had it. You're tired of them disrespecting you, your race and your opinion. A second before you open your mouth to respond to their detestable comments with a plethora of venom of your own, you realize that stooping to their level may not solve anything. You pause, ball up your fist and go off on them...despite the repercussions.
We live in a world saturated in hate, jealousy and disrespect. It's understandably very difficult to remain calm and ladylike when someone legitimately attacks our character, race, ethnicity or gender. Sometimes it seems like no matter how much we try to ignore negativity we can't escape its wrath.
It's extremely vital that we think spiritually before we react to hatred. We must know that fighting fire with fire will only create more fire. We must allow God to provide us with wise precipitation that can rain down on hate and shatter its existence. We must learn how to respectfully disagree with each other. We will never always agree with each other, but we should always be able to love each other.
Beloved, never avenge yourselves, but leave it to the wrath of God, for it is written, ‘Vengeance is mine, I will repay, says the Lord.”—Romans 12:19
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As soon as you walk into your job, you can hear many of them joyously talk about the inauguration and how they are ecstatic that President Obama is out of office. As they continue to degrade President Obama by calling him everything except for the N-word, you immediately walk toward them. You've officially had it. You're tired of them disrespecting you, your race and your opinion. A second before you open your mouth to respond to their detestable comments with a plethora of venom of your own, you realize that stooping to their level may not solve anything. You pause, ball up your fist and go off on them...despite the repercussions.
We live in a world saturated in hate, jealousy and disrespect. It's understandably very difficult to remain calm and ladylike when someone legitimately attacks our character, race, ethnicity or gender. Sometimes it seems like no matter how much we try to ignore negativity we can't escape its wrath.
It's extremely vital that we think spiritually before we react to hatred. We must know that fighting fire with fire will only create more fire. We must allow God to provide us with wise precipitation that can rain down on hate and shatter its existence. We must learn how to respectfully disagree with each other. We will never always agree with each other, but we should always be able to love each other.
Beloved, never avenge yourselves, but leave it to the wrath of God, for it is written, ‘Vengeance is mine, I will repay, says the Lord.”—Romans 12:19
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ASTOUNDING SOULS: A Tribute To President And Mrs. Obama
When you were elected the 44th president of the United States, the earth slid off of its axis and began rotating on the infinite dreams of our ancestors that have become a reality through you.
As soon as you took office, the insurmountable weight of everyone's endless hope submerged your shoulders waiting for you to cure the negativity that has ravaged this country for centuries.
You proudly took on the task, but not without the darkness that is hate fighting you every step of the way.
Every time you tried to implement policies immersed in love, many fought back with immature bigotry, racist wrath and perpetual jealousy.
The more you reached out in love, the more their souls marinated in abhorrence.
Although you were despised by many, you were never alone.
You had a queen by your side.
Your queen, Queen Michelle proudly had your back 24/7.
She showed us that a REAL lady envelopes herself in mental and physical restraint while others exhibit incomprehensible buffoonery and ignorance.
She showed us how to succeed in every facet of a situation with class, sass and humor.
She showed us how to authentically embrace positivity in the mist of intense mayhem.
I thank you both for showing us how to walk through the fire untouched with everlasting dignity, untiring strength and undying love for yourself and others.
I thank you both for showing us that we are worthy of becoming our best selves despite what society may think.
I thank you both for humbly stepping into the massive shoes created for us by African kings and queens, black slaves, civil rights leaders and everyone who had a dream for our equality to become a reality.
I thank you both for being ASTOUNDING SOULS.
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As soon as you took office, the insurmountable weight of everyone's endless hope submerged your shoulders waiting for you to cure the negativity that has ravaged this country for centuries.
You proudly took on the task, but not without the darkness that is hate fighting you every step of the way.
Every time you tried to implement policies immersed in love, many fought back with immature bigotry, racist wrath and perpetual jealousy.
The more you reached out in love, the more their souls marinated in abhorrence.
Although you were despised by many, you were never alone.
You had a queen by your side.
Your queen, Queen Michelle proudly had your back 24/7.
She showed us that a REAL lady envelopes herself in mental and physical restraint while others exhibit incomprehensible buffoonery and ignorance.
She showed us how to succeed in every facet of a situation with class, sass and humor.
She showed us how to authentically embrace positivity in the mist of intense mayhem.
I thank you both for showing us how to walk through the fire untouched with everlasting dignity, untiring strength and undying love for yourself and others.
I thank you both for showing us that we are worthy of becoming our best selves despite what society may think.
I thank you both for humbly stepping into the massive shoes created for us by African kings and queens, black slaves, civil rights leaders and everyone who had a dream for our equality to become a reality.
I thank you both for being ASTOUNDING SOULS.
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Do Your Life Choices Give God The Middle Finger?
As soon as you arrive to work, your boss's secretary Kenya tells you that she wants to see you in her office immediately. Your stomach instantly contorts into multiple knots that almost prevent you from responding to Kenya. A few seconds pass before you tell her you'll be there as soon as you put your purse and coat down in your office.
Once you enter Ms. Leblanc's office, she eases your mind by telling you that you're not in any trouble. She tells you that she wants to promote you to social media director (her current position) once she becomes the communications director. Your stomach immediately goes from being in knots to leaping for joy and doing the running man. There's just one catch. She needs you to sneak into the current communications director's office and delete some files and replace them with files that contain information and errors that will get her fired.
Ms. Leblanc smiles mischievously and goes on to say that this is the ONLY way you will get a promotion. As you remain silent and listen to her give you more repulsive details about her scheme, you contemplate your decision. You know it's wrong and totally out of your character to even think about something like this. You know that it goes against God's will. Unfortunately, you also know that you really could use the huge salary increase and your ultimate goal has always been to be a social media director. You also fear what can happen if you turn this opportunity down. As you take a few more seconds to contemplate your decision, you decide to throw your moral compass into the abyss with a smile, nod and shake of the hand. You have officially made a deal with the devil instead of trusting God.
Daily we are faced with a multitude of decisions that can help or hurt us depending on how we respond to them. More and more it seems like the best way is the wrong way. We've become so consumed with experiencing instant gratification that we dismiss God's guidance. We've successfully allowed our voices to become louder than God's voice in our lives.
It's imperative that we remember to consult God about every relationship and opportunity we desire to have. We must remember that our desires aren't always physically, mentally and/or spiritually healthy for us. If we want to receive the most positivity out of any experience, we must let the Lord guide us. He knows best. That's why He's our Savior.
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Once you enter Ms. Leblanc's office, she eases your mind by telling you that you're not in any trouble. She tells you that she wants to promote you to social media director (her current position) once she becomes the communications director. Your stomach immediately goes from being in knots to leaping for joy and doing the running man. There's just one catch. She needs you to sneak into the current communications director's office and delete some files and replace them with files that contain information and errors that will get her fired.
Ms. Leblanc smiles mischievously and goes on to say that this is the ONLY way you will get a promotion. As you remain silent and listen to her give you more repulsive details about her scheme, you contemplate your decision. You know it's wrong and totally out of your character to even think about something like this. You know that it goes against God's will. Unfortunately, you also know that you really could use the huge salary increase and your ultimate goal has always been to be a social media director. You also fear what can happen if you turn this opportunity down. As you take a few more seconds to contemplate your decision, you decide to throw your moral compass into the abyss with a smile, nod and shake of the hand. You have officially made a deal with the devil instead of trusting God.
Daily we are faced with a multitude of decisions that can help or hurt us depending on how we respond to them. More and more it seems like the best way is the wrong way. We've become so consumed with experiencing instant gratification that we dismiss God's guidance. We've successfully allowed our voices to become louder than God's voice in our lives.
It's imperative that we remember to consult God about every relationship and opportunity we desire to have. We must remember that our desires aren't always physically, mentally and/or spiritually healthy for us. If we want to receive the most positivity out of any experience, we must let the Lord guide us. He knows best. That's why He's our Savior.
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WITTY HOLIDAY PETITE POEM SERIES
Naughty Or Nice Christmas Dinner
This is the third poem in this series. During this holiday season, I decided to write a series of short poems that explore the ups, downs and everything in between we experience during the holiday season. Each poem is meant to entertain, inspire and encourage you to embrace the spectacular highs and fight through the lows with God’s spectacular love.
I wrote this poem because many of us love celebrating Christmas but we dread going to some family gatherings. Some of us really struggle with the proper way to deal with "negative" people and situations in a positive and mature manner.
As I think about going to Christmas family dinner, I cringe at the thought of having to deal with some of my not so jolly family members.
Instead of indulging in zesty gumbo, savory crawfish bisque and mouthwatering seafood stuffed mirlitons, I'm plagued with the curse that is the bragging of shallow family members.
Instead of relishing in the splendor of succulent turkey, scrumptious Creole mac and cheese and tantalizing sweet potato crunch, I'm forced to play 21 questions with one of the most insanely nosy relatives on the planet.
Instead of stuffing my face with buttery apple caramel cookies, silky triple berry cheesecake and delectable cherry pie, I'm vexed by the Grinch-like attitude of my fellow kinfolk.
As thoughts of being around some of my not so nice family members start swirling through my mind and try to drive me crazy, my rational side washes over me.
Being around family isn't just about accepting the positive.
It's about all of us loving each other despite our flaws.
It's about us doing our best to love others as Christ loves us.
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I wrote this poem because many of us love celebrating Christmas but we dread going to some family gatherings. Some of us really struggle with the proper way to deal with "negative" people and situations in a positive and mature manner.
As I think about going to Christmas family dinner, I cringe at the thought of having to deal with some of my not so jolly family members.
Instead of indulging in zesty gumbo, savory crawfish bisque and mouthwatering seafood stuffed mirlitons, I'm plagued with the curse that is the bragging of shallow family members.
Instead of relishing in the splendor of succulent turkey, scrumptious Creole mac and cheese and tantalizing sweet potato crunch, I'm forced to play 21 questions with one of the most insanely nosy relatives on the planet.
Instead of stuffing my face with buttery apple caramel cookies, silky triple berry cheesecake and delectable cherry pie, I'm vexed by the Grinch-like attitude of my fellow kinfolk.
As thoughts of being around some of my not so nice family members start swirling through my mind and try to drive me crazy, my rational side washes over me.
Being around family isn't just about accepting the positive.
It's about all of us loving each other despite our flaws.
It's about us doing our best to love others as Christ loves us.
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WITTY HOLIDAY PETITE POEM SERIES
No Christmas Boo Blues
This is the second poem in this series. During this holiday season, I decided to write a series of short poems that explore the ups, downs and everything in between we experience during the holiday season. Each poem is meant to entertain, inspire and encourage you to embrace the spectacular highs and fight through the lows with God’s spectacular love.
This poem is about how we sometimes feel melancholy or embarrassed to be alone during the holidays. After all, it is cuffing season (time between fall and winter months when happily single ladies and gentlemen desire to be in a relationship).
As I watch blissful couples cuddle in long lines, gently hold hands and whisper heartfelt promises they only intend to keep for the holidays, all I can think is…BAH HUMBUG.
As I watch a Christmas movie on TV, I embrace the green that is envy when the main characters fall in love and joyously spend the holidays with each other.
As I think about how everyone around me has a main squeeze for Christmas, I cringe at the thought of attending numerous events stag.
Then my clever mind begins to swirl and think about all of the endless perks of being single for the holidays.
I don't have to be subjected to entertain any of "his" creepy, smelly, or insanely boring relatives.
I don't have to spend any of my priceless money or time buying "him" a present.
And last but certainly not least, I get to celebrate and engulf my aura into the awesomeness of my real boyfriend—Christ.
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This poem is about how we sometimes feel melancholy or embarrassed to be alone during the holidays. After all, it is cuffing season (time between fall and winter months when happily single ladies and gentlemen desire to be in a relationship).
As I watch blissful couples cuddle in long lines, gently hold hands and whisper heartfelt promises they only intend to keep for the holidays, all I can think is…BAH HUMBUG.
As I watch a Christmas movie on TV, I embrace the green that is envy when the main characters fall in love and joyously spend the holidays with each other.
As I think about how everyone around me has a main squeeze for Christmas, I cringe at the thought of attending numerous events stag.
Then my clever mind begins to swirl and think about all of the endless perks of being single for the holidays.
I don't have to be subjected to entertain any of "his" creepy, smelly, or insanely boring relatives.
I don't have to spend any of my priceless money or time buying "him" a present.
And last but certainly not least, I get to celebrate and engulf my aura into the awesomeness of my real boyfriend—Christ.
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WITTY HOLIDAY PETITE POEM SERIES
Gift Catch-22
This holiday season I decided to write a series of short poems that explore the ups, downs and everything in between we experience during the holiday season. Each poem is meant to entertain, inspire and encourage you to embrace the spectacular highs and fight through the lows with God’s spectacular love.
The first poem in this series (Gift Catch-22) is about the conflict some of us experience when our finances don’t coincide with our desire to buy extravagant gifts for our loved ones.
As my fingers graze the rhinestone encrusted collar of a rose gold cashmere sweater, my eyes gaze at the price tag that says $220.00 more than my finances can comprehend.
My eyes begin to caress a silver and black beaded open cuff necklace that is guaranteed to have me eating Ramen Noodles for the next three months.
Everywhere I look I see luxurious items that are just begging for me to purchase them, put them under my tree and sell my soul to become the ultimate retail slave.
Then my mind happily floats back to reality.
Christmas gifts are a symbol of Christ coming to earth and giving us the gift of salvation.
Gifts that are purchased and given in love aren’t based on price, couture brands or shallow status.
They are based on the authentic love and endless respect we have for each other.
Wise present giving will never allow us to experience a GIFT CATCH-22.
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The first poem in this series (Gift Catch-22) is about the conflict some of us experience when our finances don’t coincide with our desire to buy extravagant gifts for our loved ones.
As my fingers graze the rhinestone encrusted collar of a rose gold cashmere sweater, my eyes gaze at the price tag that says $220.00 more than my finances can comprehend.
My eyes begin to caress a silver and black beaded open cuff necklace that is guaranteed to have me eating Ramen Noodles for the next three months.
Everywhere I look I see luxurious items that are just begging for me to purchase them, put them under my tree and sell my soul to become the ultimate retail slave.
Then my mind happily floats back to reality.
Christmas gifts are a symbol of Christ coming to earth and giving us the gift of salvation.
Gifts that are purchased and given in love aren’t based on price, couture brands or shallow status.
They are based on the authentic love and endless respect we have for each other.
Wise present giving will never allow us to experience a GIFT CATCH-22.
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Are You Starving For Love?
As you stare at your phone reading the text message your boyfriend Hunter sent you, your stomach begins swirling with pain and frustration. In the text, he tells you that he no longer wants to be with you because he has fallen in love with someone else. Your frustration flows into severe sadness. Hunter is the fifth "boyfriend" you've had in nine months.
You throw your phone on your bed and turn on the TV. As you flip from station to station, you see smiling faces of couples in love and you watch them with envy. "Why can't someone love me like that," you whisper to yourself.
For years, you've always longed for someone to love you unconditionally. Since you didn't receive parental love, you started focusing on guys to fill the hole. The more you allow them to engulf themselves into your mind, body and spirit, the more they demolish your hopes and dreams of acceptance and happiness. You have successfully been looking for love in all the wrong places.
Many of us ladies are victims of trying to fill empty emotional spaces from childhood with a significant other (usually the wrong one). We search high and low for eternal peace from temporary beings. By doing this, we set ourselves up for failure.
It's imperative that we recognize the source of our pain and deal with it directly instead of trying to mask it with an outside person or thing. We must realize that the only faultless love we can experience is from God. No one can fill His shoes or make us whole. He is the only one that can be our everything.
“Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.”—Philippians 4:6
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You throw your phone on your bed and turn on the TV. As you flip from station to station, you see smiling faces of couples in love and you watch them with envy. "Why can't someone love me like that," you whisper to yourself.
For years, you've always longed for someone to love you unconditionally. Since you didn't receive parental love, you started focusing on guys to fill the hole. The more you allow them to engulf themselves into your mind, body and spirit, the more they demolish your hopes and dreams of acceptance and happiness. You have successfully been looking for love in all the wrong places.
Many of us ladies are victims of trying to fill empty emotional spaces from childhood with a significant other (usually the wrong one). We search high and low for eternal peace from temporary beings. By doing this, we set ourselves up for failure.
It's imperative that we recognize the source of our pain and deal with it directly instead of trying to mask it with an outside person or thing. We must realize that the only faultless love we can experience is from God. No one can fill His shoes or make us whole. He is the only one that can be our everything.
“Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.”—Philippians 4:6
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Do You Let Prejudice Kill Your Spirit?
Confusion rapidly swirls around your mind as your boss tells you that you won't make partner this year. As he tells how much he appreciates you bringing in the biggest and most successful accounts this year, anger begins to seep into your thoughts and paint a sheer wash of crimson on your face. The more he talks about your stellar leadership qualities and pleasant attitude, the more your composure fades. You are livid.
You interrupt his phony compliments and flood his corner office with harsh words mixed with tears of frustration. As he tries to calm you down and assure you that you will most likely make partner next year, you feel the authentic passion for your job fade without any possibility of return. You are broken. You feel you no longer have the energy to continue working for a public relations firm that doesn't respect your talent and success because you are a woman and a minority. Your hope to be respected as an equal dies along with your spirit.
We live in a society that sees differences (sex, race, ethnicity, class, etc.) as a curse instead of a blessing. It's become okay to demean and underestimate someone based on their background. Today tensions are rising rapidly and we must find a way to conquer them without our spirits being tainted.
It's vital that we recognize that Satan is playing a dangerous game in our lives. He wants us to hate each other and isolate ourselves from one another. We must to be open to learning about our differences. We don't always have to agree or understand, but we should all be able to respect each other. God created us all to praise Him and spread His love. In order to do that, we cannot embody hatred.
“Anyone who claims to be in the light but hates a brother or sister is still in the darkness.”—1 John 2:9
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You interrupt his phony compliments and flood his corner office with harsh words mixed with tears of frustration. As he tries to calm you down and assure you that you will most likely make partner next year, you feel the authentic passion for your job fade without any possibility of return. You are broken. You feel you no longer have the energy to continue working for a public relations firm that doesn't respect your talent and success because you are a woman and a minority. Your hope to be respected as an equal dies along with your spirit.
We live in a society that sees differences (sex, race, ethnicity, class, etc.) as a curse instead of a blessing. It's become okay to demean and underestimate someone based on their background. Today tensions are rising rapidly and we must find a way to conquer them without our spirits being tainted.
It's vital that we recognize that Satan is playing a dangerous game in our lives. He wants us to hate each other and isolate ourselves from one another. We must to be open to learning about our differences. We don't always have to agree or understand, but we should all be able to respect each other. God created us all to praise Him and spread His love. In order to do that, we cannot embody hatred.
“Anyone who claims to be in the light but hates a brother or sister is still in the darkness.”—1 John 2:9
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Are You Afraid To Support Right When It’s Unpopular?
Your stomach begins to tighten as your colleagues start bashing you all's Afro-Latina waitress' thick Spanish accent. As they continue to mock her mispronunciation of words, you put your head down and take your fork and begin fidgeting with your seafood jambalaya. Your mind begins swirling because you detest everything they are saying but you are too afraid to speak your piece.
When she comes to collect payment for you all's bills, everybody except for you decides to not leave her a tip because they feel that her "fresh off the boat" aura prohibited her from serving you all faster. You are seething with silent anger because you recognize and appreciate her friendly spirit and patience with your colleagues' sour attitudes toward her. A part of you wants to come to her rescue and tell them off, but your hunger for acceptance drowns your moral bravery. Instead, you tip her for the whole table and hope her essence isn't wounded by their bitter attitudes.
Our society is suffering from a lethal moral illness called disrespect and shallow values. Most of us are more concerned with being accepted into the "in crowd" instead of fighting for what's right. We have involuntarily become the villains in the story that is life.
It's crucial that we remove ourselves from unscrupulous talk, thoughts and behavior. God created us to glorify His awesomeness, and it's impossible for us to do so if we condone wrong. He wants us to trust that He can and will have our backs when conflicts arise. He will give us the ability to react wisely. Remember silence is consent.
“So whoever knows the right thing to do and fails to do it, for him it is sin.”—James 4:17
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When she comes to collect payment for you all's bills, everybody except for you decides to not leave her a tip because they feel that her "fresh off the boat" aura prohibited her from serving you all faster. You are seething with silent anger because you recognize and appreciate her friendly spirit and patience with your colleagues' sour attitudes toward her. A part of you wants to come to her rescue and tell them off, but your hunger for acceptance drowns your moral bravery. Instead, you tip her for the whole table and hope her essence isn't wounded by their bitter attitudes.
Our society is suffering from a lethal moral illness called disrespect and shallow values. Most of us are more concerned with being accepted into the "in crowd" instead of fighting for what's right. We have involuntarily become the villains in the story that is life.
It's crucial that we remove ourselves from unscrupulous talk, thoughts and behavior. God created us to glorify His awesomeness, and it's impossible for us to do so if we condone wrong. He wants us to trust that He can and will have our backs when conflicts arise. He will give us the ability to react wisely. Remember silence is consent.
“So whoever knows the right thing to do and fails to do it, for him it is sin.”—James 4:17
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Are You Wearing A Spiritual Mask?
As you start getting ready to go to your cousin Terri's Halloween party, you begin slathering on black and white makeup to create a glamorous skeleton face. With each stroke of midnight you paint around your eyes, you start reminiscing on how the past few years of your life have been submerged in unexpected chaos, consuming fear, poisonous anger and intense sorrow.
As you dip your fingers into the creamy white makeup and gently begin massaging it on your chin and neck, you realize that your past trying experiences have choked the zest out of your spirit. You are no longer you. You are a ghost of yourself. Sadly no one around you has noticed your spiritual death because you wear a protective mask. You have mastered the art of impersonating your old self. As you look into the mirror, you see more than the corpse bride you portray. You see an emotional mask you may never be able to take off.
We have all experienced unexpected breakups, soul-crushing death, ruthless betrayal, endless untruths, vigorous jealousy and tongue-lashing quarrels. These encounters shape the way we respond to future incidents. Some of us do our best to learn, mature and gain wisdom from them, and some of us slowly (or rapidly) begin to decay. We become spiritually stagnant and put on a face of strength instead of embodying it.
It's imperative that we recognize that our trials are meant to enhance our strengths and prepare us for our callings in life. We must rid our spirits of desolate thoughts and feelings and replace them with faith and God's wisdom. We must remember that God doesn't want us (our real selves) to disappear. He wants us to be real, strong and virtuous.
“Beloved, think it not strange concerning the fiery trial which is to try you, as though some strange thing happened unto you: But rejoice, inasmuch as ye are partakers of Christ's sufferings; that, when his glory shall be revealed, ye may be glad also with exceeding joy.”—1 Peter 4:12-13
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As you dip your fingers into the creamy white makeup and gently begin massaging it on your chin and neck, you realize that your past trying experiences have choked the zest out of your spirit. You are no longer you. You are a ghost of yourself. Sadly no one around you has noticed your spiritual death because you wear a protective mask. You have mastered the art of impersonating your old self. As you look into the mirror, you see more than the corpse bride you portray. You see an emotional mask you may never be able to take off.
We have all experienced unexpected breakups, soul-crushing death, ruthless betrayal, endless untruths, vigorous jealousy and tongue-lashing quarrels. These encounters shape the way we respond to future incidents. Some of us do our best to learn, mature and gain wisdom from them, and some of us slowly (or rapidly) begin to decay. We become spiritually stagnant and put on a face of strength instead of embodying it.
It's imperative that we recognize that our trials are meant to enhance our strengths and prepare us for our callings in life. We must rid our spirits of desolate thoughts and feelings and replace them with faith and God's wisdom. We must remember that God doesn't want us (our real selves) to disappear. He wants us to be real, strong and virtuous.
“Beloved, think it not strange concerning the fiery trial which is to try you, as though some strange thing happened unto you: But rejoice, inasmuch as ye are partakers of Christ's sufferings; that, when his glory shall be revealed, ye may be glad also with exceeding joy.”—1 Peter 4:12-13
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Do You Enjoy Conflict And Chaos?
You jump into your cobalt blue Ford Fusion rapidly exhaling anger like air. As you speed off, you can't believe what just happened at your sisterhood meeting. Your "sisters" told you that you are no longer welcome to be a member of the organization because you cause too much drama.
You sit at a red light in awe of what they said to you. The event coordinator Shellie told you that for the past two years, every conflict that has occurred in the group was because of your negative aura and your big mouth. She told you that you have a problem respecting people's opinions and will stop at nothing to get them to say and do what you want.
Her words haunt your psyche as they swirl around your brain on repeat. As you pull into your driveway, you begin assessing how many people you've alienated over the years with your confrontational attitude. You used to think that your sharp tongue and continuous aggression was cute and cool. Now you're questioning your character...and what it lacks.
It's become extremely common for girls and women to consume each other with negative comments and actions daily for shallow reasons. Society has made it okay to attack instead of talk to each other respectfully if there is an issue. Society has replaced love, humbleness and discipline with vile venom.
It's crucial that we remember how important it is to watch what comes out of our mouths. Words can elevate our spirits to perpetual heights or make them plummet into an abyss. What we say is directly connected to the condition of our spirits (filled with the Holy Spirit or Satan). If we want to be our best, we must ask God to guide and protect us from our flawed selves.
“Whoever keeps his mouth and his tongue keeps himself out of trouble.”-Proverbs 21:23
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You sit at a red light in awe of what they said to you. The event coordinator Shellie told you that for the past two years, every conflict that has occurred in the group was because of your negative aura and your big mouth. She told you that you have a problem respecting people's opinions and will stop at nothing to get them to say and do what you want.
Her words haunt your psyche as they swirl around your brain on repeat. As you pull into your driveway, you begin assessing how many people you've alienated over the years with your confrontational attitude. You used to think that your sharp tongue and continuous aggression was cute and cool. Now you're questioning your character...and what it lacks.
It's become extremely common for girls and women to consume each other with negative comments and actions daily for shallow reasons. Society has made it okay to attack instead of talk to each other respectfully if there is an issue. Society has replaced love, humbleness and discipline with vile venom.
It's crucial that we remember how important it is to watch what comes out of our mouths. Words can elevate our spirits to perpetual heights or make them plummet into an abyss. What we say is directly connected to the condition of our spirits (filled with the Holy Spirit or Satan). If we want to be our best, we must ask God to guide and protect us from our flawed selves.
“Whoever keeps his mouth and his tongue keeps himself out of trouble.”-Proverbs 21:23
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Are You Letting Him Love You To Death?
As soon as your alarm clock begins singing its rambunctious song, you jerk out of your sound sleep. You immediately wince in agony and grab your stomach. Your mind goes back to last night's quarrel with your boyfriend Marcel. As you attempt to ease out of your queen size bed, you reflect on how Marcel stormed into your apartment and accused you of flirting with his best friend because you complimented his outfit.
Before you can plead your case, you feel a wrathful backhanded slap come across your left cheek. You lose your balance and trip onto your loveseat. You try to protect your face with your hands as he throws punch after punch. Once he gets tired of assaulting your body, he starts on your spirit. He starts calling you a lying tramp and every other vile name he can conjure up.
As you finish reminiscing on last night's nightmare, you continuously remind yourself of how blessed you are to be with such a handsome, driven and talented guy like Marcel. You remind yourself that he comes from a phenomenal family that adores you. You remind yourself that you could never get a better guy than him. You also remind yourself that it's all lies...that you will continue to tell yourself.
Daily we ladies are bombarded with messages that not having a "man" in our lives equals failure, loneliness and incompetence. We are made to feel that we only have one chance to experience true love (whether it's with Mr. Right or Wrong). We become so obsessed with wanting to be in a relationship we forget that we deserve to be respected.
It's imperative that we remember that God didn't create us to be someone's punching bag (physically or mentally). We must remember that love isn't dangerous or painful—evil is. We must know the difference between God blessing us and Satan enslaving us by putting certain people in our lives. We must remember that we are fabulous whether we are single or in a relationship.
“Husbands, love your wives, and do not be harsh with them.”—Colossians 3:19
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Before you can plead your case, you feel a wrathful backhanded slap come across your left cheek. You lose your balance and trip onto your loveseat. You try to protect your face with your hands as he throws punch after punch. Once he gets tired of assaulting your body, he starts on your spirit. He starts calling you a lying tramp and every other vile name he can conjure up.
As you finish reminiscing on last night's nightmare, you continuously remind yourself of how blessed you are to be with such a handsome, driven and talented guy like Marcel. You remind yourself that he comes from a phenomenal family that adores you. You remind yourself that you could never get a better guy than him. You also remind yourself that it's all lies...that you will continue to tell yourself.
Daily we ladies are bombarded with messages that not having a "man" in our lives equals failure, loneliness and incompetence. We are made to feel that we only have one chance to experience true love (whether it's with Mr. Right or Wrong). We become so obsessed with wanting to be in a relationship we forget that we deserve to be respected.
It's imperative that we remember that God didn't create us to be someone's punching bag (physically or mentally). We must remember that love isn't dangerous or painful—evil is. We must know the difference between God blessing us and Satan enslaving us by putting certain people in our lives. We must remember that we are fabulous whether we are single or in a relationship.
“Husbands, love your wives, and do not be harsh with them.”—Colossians 3:19
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Are You Suffering From Body Image Issues?
It has been over an hour since you first began critiquing your body in the mirror. You slowly turn from side to side trying to hold your stomach in and cinch in your waste with your hands. You hold your arm out and examine the amount of jiggle that occurs as you shake it. You glance at your backside wishing it was a little tighter and rounder.
The longer you assess your body, the more your spirit begins to crack with fractures of insecurity, frustration and defeat. Potent tears slowly cascade down your face because you feel you'll never be able to live up to the "Hollywood" standard of a beautiful body. You walk out of your bathroom embodying the warped body image complex so many girls and women have adopted—a toxic version of true beauty.
Most of the media, our communities and peers have accepted the ideology that only certain body shapes, sizes and features are beautiful. Daily we are bombarded with ads, interviews, and conversations on what women should buy or do to achieve a "sexy" figure. The more we absorb this warped doctrine, the more we will develop unhealthy relationships with our bodies and others.
It's vital that we recognize and appreciate that God made all of us to look and be different. He doesn't want us to harm our minds, bodies or spirits in order to attempt to be what the masses say is beautiful. God wants us to work hard to become the best versions of ourselves. He wants us to look in the mirror and see the beauty of what it means to be created on His image. He wants us to embody self-love.
“You are altogether beautiful, my love, there is no flaw in you.”—Song of Solomon 4:7
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The longer you assess your body, the more your spirit begins to crack with fractures of insecurity, frustration and defeat. Potent tears slowly cascade down your face because you feel you'll never be able to live up to the "Hollywood" standard of a beautiful body. You walk out of your bathroom embodying the warped body image complex so many girls and women have adopted—a toxic version of true beauty.
Most of the media, our communities and peers have accepted the ideology that only certain body shapes, sizes and features are beautiful. Daily we are bombarded with ads, interviews, and conversations on what women should buy or do to achieve a "sexy" figure. The more we absorb this warped doctrine, the more we will develop unhealthy relationships with our bodies and others.
It's vital that we recognize and appreciate that God made all of us to look and be different. He doesn't want us to harm our minds, bodies or spirits in order to attempt to be what the masses say is beautiful. God wants us to work hard to become the best versions of ourselves. He wants us to look in the mirror and see the beauty of what it means to be created on His image. He wants us to embody self-love.
“You are altogether beautiful, my love, there is no flaw in you.”—Song of Solomon 4:7
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FAITHFUL TESTIMONY: Interview With Afrotastic Lady Creator Monica Vance
Yesterday I was extremely blessed to interview the beautiful soul and creator of the Christian-themed blog Afrotastic Lady Monica Vance. The Worcester, MA native and University of Massachusetts Amherst grad shared how her love for the Lord, writing and empowering women inspired her to create a platform to encourage women to embrace their natural beauty, spirits and God.
What inspired you to create your blog?
What a thoughtful question. Before I officially started my blog, I had been toying around with the idea for a while. I decided that I wanted to create my own space dedicated to my love of God and writing. Since I was a little girl, I loved to write. As I got older and entered the work world, I did not spend as much time writing as I should have. Coincidentally, a few weeks before I started my first year of a MSW (masters in social work) program, I created afrotasticlady.com. Now the blog is 2 years old.
How did you come up with your blog name?
Hehe! Well, I took a selfie one day and noted that it was “afrotastic” as my natural hair was big and doing its own thing. After I took that picture, I frequently referred to myself as “afrotastic.” When I first created the blog, I wanted a name that represented my quirkiness and my appreciation of natural hair. So it seemed practical and unique to add “lady” to “afrotastic.”
What made you want to focus on physical and spiritual empowerment and acceptance?
When I started the blog I was looking to learn more about God’s love. My tagline is “Love God, Embrace Love, and Be Afrotastic!” Every day I believe we all have to choose to love God, others and ourselves. It’s not always an easy task to love, but it is so integral to our emotional and spiritual health to do so. God’s sacrificial love raised me from a stinky and sinful life to a full one. Life has its challenges, but I know that I have hope in Jesus. As I read about the vastness of God’s love, I wanted other folks to grow and learn with me. I wanted to encourage women to see themselves as beautiful and gifted because God made them. Although my blog is open to women of all races, I needed women of color to accept their gorgeous brown skin. I also sought to support naturalistas because our hair can be a source of criticism. Society will try to tell us how we should wear our hair, but we do not have to listen to such demands. God created our beautiful coils, and His opinion is what we should be listening to. I have a heart for writing vulnerable, yet faith-filled posts. I love community, and I think women of God need each other’s support. My blog posts are one way that I try to support other and even encourage myself.
Have you always been interested in writing?
I think I became interested in writing when I was about eight or nine years old. Growing up I was kind of shy so reading and writing was a great escape for me. I started reading pieces at church and people would tell me I was such a good writer and encouraged me to keep writing. That’s when I started realizing it was a gift that God had given me.
What do you like most about having your own blog?
I adore having my own writing space. In the future, I would like to write and publish Christian fiction. Until that happens, I decided that I would invest in my writing through my blog. I believe that God has given everyone a gift/talent in order to edify others. It took some time for me to finally embrace the fact that I am a writer. I grew tired of neglecting and downplaying the gift. It was a big step of faith to put myself out there and start a blog. I appreciate that I have control over what I write about on my blog. Primarily I write about how my faith in God and my life intersects. God is present in my joyful moments such as going to a concert or celebrating my 30th birthday. He is also present in my challenges such as grieving the death of my sister or surviving graduate school. And as silly as this statement may sound, I believe God has been present with me during my natural hair journey too. Despite the diversity of these topics, they are all connected by God. He is my strength, and He cares about the small and large situations in my life. Lastly, I love that I have been able to interact with several Christian writers and bloggers. We read each other’s blogs and comment on them. As you have probably observed, there are tons and tons of blogs online. It is so wonderful and helpful to find like-minded writers and bloggers who can support you. Even though we have never met in person, we have created a community.
How has it helped you grow mentally and spiritually?
Mentally I have grown in my critical thinking skills. I dedicate more time to writing down my thoughts. As I mentioned earlier, I have learned to honor the gift of writing that God has given me. I would define myself as a personal and faith writer/blogger. At times, I will write out posts and revelations will occur. I believe these revelations happen most when I write about the loss of my sister to Multiple Sclerosis. I have used blog posts to not only unpack painful things, but to allow God to heal and free me of them. Spiritually I feel like God speaks to me through writing. God unlocks the truth about His goodness through words. And I use my blog to write down what I have been learning from Him to encourage others on their own spiritual paths.
What is the overall message you want girls and ladies to receive when they visit your blog?
I want everybody that reads the articles on my website to know that God’s loves them. I also want them to love themselves—especially women of color. When we turn on the TV we see so many images that can make us feel like we aren’t good enough and that we aren’t pretty enough. I want them to know that no matter what you look like or how you wear your hair (natural or straight) God loves you just the way you are.
What is the ultimate goal you would like to achieve in relation to your blog?
I just want my blog to reach out to people that need to be encouraged. And I would also like to write Christian Fiction in the future. I see my blog as a stepping stone to achieving that.
What is your favorite scripture/scriptures?
“For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.”-Psalm 139:13-14 I like reading these scriptures whenever I’m feeling down on myself. They lift my spirit and remind me that God loves me.
Monica’s testimony is a lovely example of how we can use our self-esteem challenges, loss of loved ones and self-discovery journeys to create an influential movement that can bless the masses with entertainment, authentic unity and pure bliss. We can embody peace if we embrace all that God has created us to be.
Monica “afrotasticlady” Vance is a graduate student, writer, blogger, and naturalista. She writes about faith and life on her Christian-themed blog. When she’s not being frugal, you may even see her drinking a specialty coffee from Starbucks. She also loves embracing the community.
Website: afrotasticlady.com
Twitter: @afrotasticlady
Instagram: afrotasticlady
Like what you've just read? Sign up for my newsletter for the latest on Faithful And Fabulous Female. ENTER HERE
What inspired you to create your blog?
What a thoughtful question. Before I officially started my blog, I had been toying around with the idea for a while. I decided that I wanted to create my own space dedicated to my love of God and writing. Since I was a little girl, I loved to write. As I got older and entered the work world, I did not spend as much time writing as I should have. Coincidentally, a few weeks before I started my first year of a MSW (masters in social work) program, I created afrotasticlady.com. Now the blog is 2 years old.
How did you come up with your blog name?
Hehe! Well, I took a selfie one day and noted that it was “afrotastic” as my natural hair was big and doing its own thing. After I took that picture, I frequently referred to myself as “afrotastic.” When I first created the blog, I wanted a name that represented my quirkiness and my appreciation of natural hair. So it seemed practical and unique to add “lady” to “afrotastic.”
What made you want to focus on physical and spiritual empowerment and acceptance?
When I started the blog I was looking to learn more about God’s love. My tagline is “Love God, Embrace Love, and Be Afrotastic!” Every day I believe we all have to choose to love God, others and ourselves. It’s not always an easy task to love, but it is so integral to our emotional and spiritual health to do so. God’s sacrificial love raised me from a stinky and sinful life to a full one. Life has its challenges, but I know that I have hope in Jesus. As I read about the vastness of God’s love, I wanted other folks to grow and learn with me. I wanted to encourage women to see themselves as beautiful and gifted because God made them. Although my blog is open to women of all races, I needed women of color to accept their gorgeous brown skin. I also sought to support naturalistas because our hair can be a source of criticism. Society will try to tell us how we should wear our hair, but we do not have to listen to such demands. God created our beautiful coils, and His opinion is what we should be listening to. I have a heart for writing vulnerable, yet faith-filled posts. I love community, and I think women of God need each other’s support. My blog posts are one way that I try to support other and even encourage myself.
Have you always been interested in writing?
I think I became interested in writing when I was about eight or nine years old. Growing up I was kind of shy so reading and writing was a great escape for me. I started reading pieces at church and people would tell me I was such a good writer and encouraged me to keep writing. That’s when I started realizing it was a gift that God had given me.
What do you like most about having your own blog?
I adore having my own writing space. In the future, I would like to write and publish Christian fiction. Until that happens, I decided that I would invest in my writing through my blog. I believe that God has given everyone a gift/talent in order to edify others. It took some time for me to finally embrace the fact that I am a writer. I grew tired of neglecting and downplaying the gift. It was a big step of faith to put myself out there and start a blog. I appreciate that I have control over what I write about on my blog. Primarily I write about how my faith in God and my life intersects. God is present in my joyful moments such as going to a concert or celebrating my 30th birthday. He is also present in my challenges such as grieving the death of my sister or surviving graduate school. And as silly as this statement may sound, I believe God has been present with me during my natural hair journey too. Despite the diversity of these topics, they are all connected by God. He is my strength, and He cares about the small and large situations in my life. Lastly, I love that I have been able to interact with several Christian writers and bloggers. We read each other’s blogs and comment on them. As you have probably observed, there are tons and tons of blogs online. It is so wonderful and helpful to find like-minded writers and bloggers who can support you. Even though we have never met in person, we have created a community.
How has it helped you grow mentally and spiritually?
Mentally I have grown in my critical thinking skills. I dedicate more time to writing down my thoughts. As I mentioned earlier, I have learned to honor the gift of writing that God has given me. I would define myself as a personal and faith writer/blogger. At times, I will write out posts and revelations will occur. I believe these revelations happen most when I write about the loss of my sister to Multiple Sclerosis. I have used blog posts to not only unpack painful things, but to allow God to heal and free me of them. Spiritually I feel like God speaks to me through writing. God unlocks the truth about His goodness through words. And I use my blog to write down what I have been learning from Him to encourage others on their own spiritual paths.
What is the overall message you want girls and ladies to receive when they visit your blog?
I want everybody that reads the articles on my website to know that God’s loves them. I also want them to love themselves—especially women of color. When we turn on the TV we see so many images that can make us feel like we aren’t good enough and that we aren’t pretty enough. I want them to know that no matter what you look like or how you wear your hair (natural or straight) God loves you just the way you are.
What is the ultimate goal you would like to achieve in relation to your blog?
I just want my blog to reach out to people that need to be encouraged. And I would also like to write Christian Fiction in the future. I see my blog as a stepping stone to achieving that.
What is your favorite scripture/scriptures?
“For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.”-Psalm 139:13-14 I like reading these scriptures whenever I’m feeling down on myself. They lift my spirit and remind me that God loves me.
Monica’s testimony is a lovely example of how we can use our self-esteem challenges, loss of loved ones and self-discovery journeys to create an influential movement that can bless the masses with entertainment, authentic unity and pure bliss. We can embody peace if we embrace all that God has created us to be.
Monica “afrotasticlady” Vance is a graduate student, writer, blogger, and naturalista. She writes about faith and life on her Christian-themed blog. When she’s not being frugal, you may even see her drinking a specialty coffee from Starbucks. She also loves embracing the community.
Website: afrotasticlady.com
Twitter: @afrotasticlady
Instagram: afrotasticlady
Like what you've just read? Sign up for my newsletter for the latest on Faithful And Fabulous Female. ENTER HERE
Five Reasons You’ve Chosen To Stay With Mr. Wrong
It's no secret that most of us ladies want to be in loving, honest and fulfilling relationships. We want a man that will adore us for eternity. Unfortunately, many of us try to achieve this type of relationship with the wrong guys. Here are five reasons we are determined to have the right relationship with the wrong man.
You Are Tired Of Being A Party Of One
You are determined that one really is the loneliest number. You don't want to be the third wheel anymore. You are totally over spending Friday nights at home binge-watching your favorite shows alone.
Your "Marriage" Clocks Are Ticking
You're 30 years old (or over) and feel like a total loser because you've never been married. You have a wonderful job, home and/or bank account but you won't feel like "real" woman until you get married and have kids.
You Are Feeling Super Frisky
Your sexual frustrations are killing you. You have no intention of casually sleeping around so You are determined to be in committed relationship that will lead to marriage.
You Are Worried About What Others Think
You can't take the pressure of people asking you when you're going to settle down. You're tired of people seeing you as lame, lonely and needing to be hooked up.
You Are Living In Fantasy Land
You are in love with love. No matter how bad a guy or situation is, you are determined to fix it or make it seem like everything is fabulous.
It's imperative that we ladies ask ourselves why we want to be in a relationship and why we want it to be with a particular person. We must ask ourselves if we've actually fallen for the person or the idea we have in our heads (must recognize the difference between our desires and our reality).
We must fall in love with a guy for who he is now and is working on becoming in the future (his promise), and not who we or he says he wants to be (his potential). What's the difference between these two things? A guy's potential is based on wishes/desires and his promise is based on his actions. We must remember that our desperation for a mate will not guarantee a stellar relationship. We must be patient and allow God to send us a man worth our awesomeness.
“Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers. For what partnership has righteousness with lawlessness? Or what fellowship has light with darkness?—2 Corinthians 6:14
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You Are Tired Of Being A Party Of One
You are determined that one really is the loneliest number. You don't want to be the third wheel anymore. You are totally over spending Friday nights at home binge-watching your favorite shows alone.
Your "Marriage" Clocks Are Ticking
You're 30 years old (or over) and feel like a total loser because you've never been married. You have a wonderful job, home and/or bank account but you won't feel like "real" woman until you get married and have kids.
You Are Feeling Super Frisky
Your sexual frustrations are killing you. You have no intention of casually sleeping around so You are determined to be in committed relationship that will lead to marriage.
You Are Worried About What Others Think
You can't take the pressure of people asking you when you're going to settle down. You're tired of people seeing you as lame, lonely and needing to be hooked up.
You Are Living In Fantasy Land
You are in love with love. No matter how bad a guy or situation is, you are determined to fix it or make it seem like everything is fabulous.
It's imperative that we ladies ask ourselves why we want to be in a relationship and why we want it to be with a particular person. We must ask ourselves if we've actually fallen for the person or the idea we have in our heads (must recognize the difference between our desires and our reality).
We must fall in love with a guy for who he is now and is working on becoming in the future (his promise), and not who we or he says he wants to be (his potential). What's the difference between these two things? A guy's potential is based on wishes/desires and his promise is based on his actions. We must remember that our desperation for a mate will not guarantee a stellar relationship. We must be patient and allow God to send us a man worth our awesomeness.
“Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers. For what partnership has righteousness with lawlessness? Or what fellowship has light with darkness?—2 Corinthians 6:14
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NEW POEM: Main Course Dilemma
He loves me...but he also loves her.
And it's okay because I'm his number one-his main course.
He spends almost 20 hours a day showering me with his dashing smile, intoxicating embraces and infectious laughter.
He appreciates my quirky interests, artistic outlook and vintage taste.
He presents me with lavish gifts, tropical vacays and priceless experiences.
He runs his cafe au lait hands through my espresso tresses whispering, "I cherish you and no one will ever take your place."
His sultry words melt any insecurities my spirit might possess...well...almost.
You see, I know he has a side piece.
Almost every other night he tiptoes out of our almost happy home to see...her.
He consumes her with kisses of passionate infidelity and scandalous caresses.
He pollutes her mind with delicate falsehoods that make her temporarily feel powerful, wanted and respected.
He blesses her with soft lies that he will leave me one day.
He will never leave me for her because she is only worth pieces of him.
He loves me...but he also loves her.
And I'm okay with that.
Now all I have to do is believe the lie I just told myself.
Many of us ladies invest numerous days, months and years into guys that are unfaithful to us. We knowingly let them disrespect us because we are afraid to be alone. We are afraid that if we let them go, no else will come along and love us the way we deserve.
It is imperative that we recognize our value and that God wants us to experience real love and not the tarnished version we know so well. He wants us to experience love's purity, not faux love's pain. We deserve to be a man’s only love.
“Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled, for God will judge the sexually immoral and adulterous.”-Hebrews 13:4
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And it's okay because I'm his number one-his main course.
He spends almost 20 hours a day showering me with his dashing smile, intoxicating embraces and infectious laughter.
He appreciates my quirky interests, artistic outlook and vintage taste.
He presents me with lavish gifts, tropical vacays and priceless experiences.
He runs his cafe au lait hands through my espresso tresses whispering, "I cherish you and no one will ever take your place."
His sultry words melt any insecurities my spirit might possess...well...almost.
You see, I know he has a side piece.
Almost every other night he tiptoes out of our almost happy home to see...her.
He consumes her with kisses of passionate infidelity and scandalous caresses.
He pollutes her mind with delicate falsehoods that make her temporarily feel powerful, wanted and respected.
He blesses her with soft lies that he will leave me one day.
He will never leave me for her because she is only worth pieces of him.
He loves me...but he also loves her.
And I'm okay with that.
Now all I have to do is believe the lie I just told myself.
Many of us ladies invest numerous days, months and years into guys that are unfaithful to us. We knowingly let them disrespect us because we are afraid to be alone. We are afraid that if we let them go, no else will come along and love us the way we deserve.
It is imperative that we recognize our value and that God wants us to experience real love and not the tarnished version we know so well. He wants us to experience love's purity, not faux love's pain. We deserve to be a man’s only love.
“Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled, for God will judge the sexually immoral and adulterous.”-Hebrews 13:4
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NEW POEM: Perpetual Paranoia
I think I'm in love with him...in an unhealthy neurotic way.
I think I love him more than me.
I think I love him so much I hate him.
His eyes pierce my befuddled psyche with warm bliss, serene honesty and unmistakable love.
His smile melts my shallow fears, explosive anger and acute sadness.
His pure love for me cascades out of his pores with ease and elegance.
His actions and intentions are genuine...but there's just one problem.
His love is driving me crazy.
Sometimes his honest hypnotic words betray him and my unjust jealousy drips from my mouth like poisonous honey.
Sometimes his innocent chivalry towards other women causes me to embody senseless panic and callus outbursts.
Sometimes his authentic “I love yous” feed my internal insecurities and create vicious “I hate yous” that go unspoken.
My relationship with myself is ruining my relationship with him...with me.
My relationship with myself is causing me to question everything around me.
I have embodied PERPETUAL PARANOIA.
Many of us ladies suffer from insecurity. We have a habit of ignoring it or not recognizing how it's damaging our minds, bodies and spirits. We begin trying to fill a spiritual hole with earthly things and people. The more we try to embrace outside love, the more we ruin that relationship because we can't recognize real love, or we feel we don't deserve it.
It's imperative that we learn to ask God to help us to embrace and love ourselves before we can experience healthy relationships with others. If we want love, we must first love ourselves.
“There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear. For fear has to do with punishment, and whoever fears has not been perfected in love.”—1 John 4:18
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I think I love him more than me.
I think I love him so much I hate him.
His eyes pierce my befuddled psyche with warm bliss, serene honesty and unmistakable love.
His smile melts my shallow fears, explosive anger and acute sadness.
His pure love for me cascades out of his pores with ease and elegance.
His actions and intentions are genuine...but there's just one problem.
His love is driving me crazy.
Sometimes his honest hypnotic words betray him and my unjust jealousy drips from my mouth like poisonous honey.
Sometimes his innocent chivalry towards other women causes me to embody senseless panic and callus outbursts.
Sometimes his authentic “I love yous” feed my internal insecurities and create vicious “I hate yous” that go unspoken.
My relationship with myself is ruining my relationship with him...with me.
My relationship with myself is causing me to question everything around me.
I have embodied PERPETUAL PARANOIA.
Many of us ladies suffer from insecurity. We have a habit of ignoring it or not recognizing how it's damaging our minds, bodies and spirits. We begin trying to fill a spiritual hole with earthly things and people. The more we try to embrace outside love, the more we ruin that relationship because we can't recognize real love, or we feel we don't deserve it.
It's imperative that we learn to ask God to help us to embrace and love ourselves before we can experience healthy relationships with others. If we want love, we must first love ourselves.
“There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear. For fear has to do with punishment, and whoever fears has not been perfected in love.”—1 John 4:18
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FAITHFUL TESTIMONY: Interview With Taking Back Positive Energy Creator Cameron Young
Last week I was tremendously blessed to interview the spiritually passionate and talented creator of the Take Back Positive Energy (TBPE) Movement Cameron Young. The Phoenix, AZ native and University Of Missouri in Kansas City graduate has been spreading optimistic light throughout the Kansas City area for four years and he has no plans on stopping. He speaks at an array of college functions encouraging students to be their best throughout the ups and downs of life. He shared with me how and why he was called to spread and motivate others to embrace God's limitless power and flawless peace.
What inspired you to come up with the Taking Back Positive Energy Movement (TBPE)?
What inspired me to come up with the TBPE movement was when I was at a point in my life (a few years ago) when I felt like I wanted to die. I almost ended my life. However, while I was crying that night, I grabbed the Bible next to me and asked the Lord to save me over and over again. I woke up the next day with a new jolt in my spirit. I had a new positive perspective on life and I felt like I could take on the world. That is when TBPE was created.
What is the purpose/goal of the Taking Back Positive Energy Movement?
The purpose of TBPE is to symbolize that no matter what it is you are going through in life, you can always take back your happiness. We all go through moments where we are stressed, sad or just flat out in a bad mood. However, you have to remind yourself that you are in control of how you feel. That is what TBPE is all about.
How has God inspired your mission?
God inspired the entire mission because if it wasn't for him, I wouldn't be alive today. He is the driving force in this movement, and He keeps me level-headed so that I am able to motivate and inspire others to think and live a more positive life.
What do you like most about motivating people to be their best?
What I enjoy most about motivating people are the results. When you can look into someone’s eyes and see that they understand your message and want to do better for themselves, it’s an incredible feeling.
How have your writings and speeches inspired you to be a better person?
My writings and speeches have definitely made me a better person. I have gotten myself into habits that keep my spirit and mind away from negativity and focus on the positives and loving other people.
What messages(s) do you want your readers/followers to take away from your work?
I want them to know that they are allowed to be human. They are allowed to cry. They are allowed to be stressed. They are allowed to be down. But they also must realize that they have a choice to take back their happiness. It’s important to understand that you have to choose to not let negativity completely take you over. A lot of people let negativity take them over and they don’t know how to get out of it. That’s why I always emphasize TBPE—Take Back Positive Energy.
What is your ultimate goal for your career?
At first TBPE was just a movement, but three weeks ago I turned it into a business. I would like to turn it into a radio and talk show one day. I want to be able to speak all over the world and share positive energy with people.
What is your favorite Bible verse and why?
“What then, shall we say in response to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us?”—Romans 8:31 I like this verse because it reminds me that no matter what I’m going through, God is with me. Nobody can take away the fact that God is my armor. Every day I step out into the world and try to motivate people to live and think positively.
Cameron's testimony is a marvelous example of how God can take us at our lowest points and use that energy to uplift us to do spectacular work that blesses the world. If we acknowledge God's greatness in our lives, we can boldly embody love and positive energy that can take us beyond our wildest colorful dreams.
Cameron Romeo Young is a positive life coach that graduated with a bachelor’s degree in communications from the University of Missouri in Kansas City. He focuses on the power of positive energy by motivating people to live and think more positive about their lives. He believes that positive energy can cure hate, negativity, and make the world an overall better place.
Twitter: TBPEnergy
Facebook: TBPEnergy
Instagram: TBPEnergy
What inspired you to come up with the Taking Back Positive Energy Movement (TBPE)?
What inspired me to come up with the TBPE movement was when I was at a point in my life (a few years ago) when I felt like I wanted to die. I almost ended my life. However, while I was crying that night, I grabbed the Bible next to me and asked the Lord to save me over and over again. I woke up the next day with a new jolt in my spirit. I had a new positive perspective on life and I felt like I could take on the world. That is when TBPE was created.
What is the purpose/goal of the Taking Back Positive Energy Movement?
The purpose of TBPE is to symbolize that no matter what it is you are going through in life, you can always take back your happiness. We all go through moments where we are stressed, sad or just flat out in a bad mood. However, you have to remind yourself that you are in control of how you feel. That is what TBPE is all about.
How has God inspired your mission?
God inspired the entire mission because if it wasn't for him, I wouldn't be alive today. He is the driving force in this movement, and He keeps me level-headed so that I am able to motivate and inspire others to think and live a more positive life.
What do you like most about motivating people to be their best?
What I enjoy most about motivating people are the results. When you can look into someone’s eyes and see that they understand your message and want to do better for themselves, it’s an incredible feeling.
How have your writings and speeches inspired you to be a better person?
My writings and speeches have definitely made me a better person. I have gotten myself into habits that keep my spirit and mind away from negativity and focus on the positives and loving other people.
What messages(s) do you want your readers/followers to take away from your work?
I want them to know that they are allowed to be human. They are allowed to cry. They are allowed to be stressed. They are allowed to be down. But they also must realize that they have a choice to take back their happiness. It’s important to understand that you have to choose to not let negativity completely take you over. A lot of people let negativity take them over and they don’t know how to get out of it. That’s why I always emphasize TBPE—Take Back Positive Energy.
What is your ultimate goal for your career?
At first TBPE was just a movement, but three weeks ago I turned it into a business. I would like to turn it into a radio and talk show one day. I want to be able to speak all over the world and share positive energy with people.
What is your favorite Bible verse and why?
“What then, shall we say in response to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us?”—Romans 8:31 I like this verse because it reminds me that no matter what I’m going through, God is with me. Nobody can take away the fact that God is my armor. Every day I step out into the world and try to motivate people to live and think positively.
Cameron's testimony is a marvelous example of how God can take us at our lowest points and use that energy to uplift us to do spectacular work that blesses the world. If we acknowledge God's greatness in our lives, we can boldly embody love and positive energy that can take us beyond our wildest colorful dreams.
Cameron Romeo Young is a positive life coach that graduated with a bachelor’s degree in communications from the University of Missouri in Kansas City. He focuses on the power of positive energy by motivating people to live and think more positive about their lives. He believes that positive energy can cure hate, negativity, and make the world an overall better place.
Twitter: TBPEnergy
Facebook: TBPEnergy
Instagram: TBPEnergy
NEW POEM: Sincere Sister-Friend Vow
I promise to not embrace poisonous energy can cause me to hate, betray or envy my fellow sister-friend.
I promise to not pollute my world or hers with immature ideologies or pointless drama.
I promise to not submerge my spirit with menacing jealousy if I think my sister-friend possesses a "better" body type, hair type or facial features than mind.
I promise to not accuse her of being better than me if she acquires more than me financially.
I promise to not turn my nose up at her if she finds authentic marital love before I do.
I promise to be real.
I promise to wish her nothing but sensational success, endless strength and pure tranquility.
I promise to share honest concern, joyous laughter and real smiles.
I promise to support her when she's experiencing life's optimistic highs and cold bottomless lows.
I will not be her enemy because that is below my spiritual maturity and hers.
I will embrace her as my sister in Christ-my SISTER-FRIEND.
It has become very popular for females to hate and bully each other for extremely immature reasons. We must realize that our actions toward each other are powerful and shouldn't be taken lightly. It is not okay to make fun of each other or try to sabotage each others' talents and/or success. God made all of us wonderfully unique. If we want to be our best, we must stop hating one another.
"Hatred stirs up conflict, but love covers all wrongs."—Proverbs 10:12
I promise to not pollute my world or hers with immature ideologies or pointless drama.
I promise to not submerge my spirit with menacing jealousy if I think my sister-friend possesses a "better" body type, hair type or facial features than mind.
I promise to not accuse her of being better than me if she acquires more than me financially.
I promise to not turn my nose up at her if she finds authentic marital love before I do.
I promise to be real.
I promise to wish her nothing but sensational success, endless strength and pure tranquility.
I promise to share honest concern, joyous laughter and real smiles.
I promise to support her when she's experiencing life's optimistic highs and cold bottomless lows.
I will not be her enemy because that is below my spiritual maturity and hers.
I will embrace her as my sister in Christ-my SISTER-FRIEND.
It has become very popular for females to hate and bully each other for extremely immature reasons. We must realize that our actions toward each other are powerful and shouldn't be taken lightly. It is not okay to make fun of each other or try to sabotage each others' talents and/or success. God made all of us wonderfully unique. If we want to be our best, we must stop hating one another.
"Hatred stirs up conflict, but love covers all wrongs."—Proverbs 10:12
NEW POEM: Exploited Treasure
She uses her priceless pearl to slay venomous dragons that leave her with soul-piercing scars that will haunt her for eternity.
She wears clothes that are sure to expose her voluptuous emeralds and gain the worthless attention of every loser in sight.
She rocks her round ruby from left to right as she walks, hoping it will get her the attention she has always craved.
This dynamic treasure unfortunately doesn't recognize her REAL beauty and unstoppable power.
She doesn't realize that her jewels are too precious to be given away carelessly.
She doesn't realize the pure love she craves should start from within.
She doesn't realize that having a positive spiritual and mental relationship with someone will always outweigh a sexual one.
This dynamic treasure has endured countless pain.
She is a victim of herself.
She is an EXPLOITED TREASURE.
Many of us ladies fall victim to using and viewing our bodies as objects to get what we want in life. We diminish our minds and spirits to shallow afterthoughts. It is imperative that we understand that exploiting our bodies for earthly gain will cause our spirits to suffer eternal consequences. We must always respect ourselves physically, mentally and spiritually.
“Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a person commits are outside the body, but whoever sins sexually, sins against their own body.”—1 Corinthians 6:18
She wears clothes that are sure to expose her voluptuous emeralds and gain the worthless attention of every loser in sight.
She rocks her round ruby from left to right as she walks, hoping it will get her the attention she has always craved.
This dynamic treasure unfortunately doesn't recognize her REAL beauty and unstoppable power.
She doesn't realize that her jewels are too precious to be given away carelessly.
She doesn't realize the pure love she craves should start from within.
She doesn't realize that having a positive spiritual and mental relationship with someone will always outweigh a sexual one.
This dynamic treasure has endured countless pain.
She is a victim of herself.
She is an EXPLOITED TREASURE.
Many of us ladies fall victim to using and viewing our bodies as objects to get what we want in life. We diminish our minds and spirits to shallow afterthoughts. It is imperative that we understand that exploiting our bodies for earthly gain will cause our spirits to suffer eternal consequences. We must always respect ourselves physically, mentally and spiritually.
“Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a person commits are outside the body, but whoever sins sexually, sins against their own body.”—1 Corinthians 6:18
NEW POEM: Faux Gentleman
He holds himself in high esteem.
He thinks his eloquent words, dapper walk and smooth essence are flawless.
He thinks his elite pedigree, stellar education and affluent career are the epitome of every woman's dream.
He is completely delusional.
This man has completely forgotten to nurture his spirit.
He is filled with shallow ideologies, unfruitful desires and corrupt mantras.
He has no desire to share his delightful blessings, impregnable protection or pure comfort.
He feels entitled to ignore your genuine acts of love and focus on perishable instant gratification.
He is completely clueless on what it takes to be a real gentleman.
A real gentleman possesses wise confidence, appropriate humbleness and immeasurable mental strength.
A real gentleman inhales priceless wisdom and knowledge and exhales immaturity daily.
A real gentleman submerges himself in complex discipline and God's unadulterated gospel.
A real gentleman happily showers the ladies in his life with everlasting respect, bold refuge and exquisite memories.
A real gentleman isn't okay with being okay mentally, physically or spiritually.
Unfortunately this man will never be a real gentleman.
He's too busy admiring his fading reflection.
He will always remain a FAUX GENTLEMAN.
He thinks his eloquent words, dapper walk and smooth essence are flawless.
He thinks his elite pedigree, stellar education and affluent career are the epitome of every woman's dream.
He is completely delusional.
This man has completely forgotten to nurture his spirit.
He is filled with shallow ideologies, unfruitful desires and corrupt mantras.
He has no desire to share his delightful blessings, impregnable protection or pure comfort.
He feels entitled to ignore your genuine acts of love and focus on perishable instant gratification.
He is completely clueless on what it takes to be a real gentleman.
A real gentleman possesses wise confidence, appropriate humbleness and immeasurable mental strength.
A real gentleman inhales priceless wisdom and knowledge and exhales immaturity daily.
A real gentleman submerges himself in complex discipline and God's unadulterated gospel.
A real gentleman happily showers the ladies in his life with everlasting respect, bold refuge and exquisite memories.
A real gentleman isn't okay with being okay mentally, physically or spiritually.
Unfortunately this man will never be a real gentleman.
He's too busy admiring his fading reflection.
He will always remain a FAUX GENTLEMAN.
Are You Immune To Racism?
As you get dressed for work, the news is blaring that another black man has been shot multiple times and killed by a police officer for no legitimate reason. You stop applying your fuchsia lip stain to watch the video. It shows the deceased clearly putting his hands in the air and asking why he is being arrested. The policeman punches him in the gut with his billy club and tells him to shut up. As he hunches over reeking in pain, he pleads and tells the police officer that he has the wrong guy. He didn't just steal a TV out of the electronics store. The officer curses him with multiple blows that fracture his arms, ribs and rip his flawless chocolate skin open. As the man tries to get up from the ground, he clutches his stomach. The officer tells him to get up with his hands in the air.
The brutally injured man refrains, telling the officer he can't because his arm might be broken. The officer pulls out his gun and tells him to put his hands up. As the man attempts to raise his arms, intense pain shoots through them and he immediately stumbles toward the officer and is shot six times in the chest. The man falls on his back and crimson begins to stain his clothes and the ground. The officer's partner runs out of the electronics store to see his partner watching the man's essence slowly detach from his body. As the man goes into perpetual sleep we call death, your mind begins to wonder.
You ask yourself if your Ivy League education, six figure salary, Fortune 500 job and elite pedigree has exempted you and your family from ever experiencing such cruelty. "I mean I've never had to deal with racism before..." As soon as you make that statement, you know it's a lie. You know that no matter what you accomplish mentally, spiritually or financially, your caramel skin will always be seen as inferior and a threat to the masses.
"We are taking 'our' country back." "All they want to do is have babies and end up on welfare." "They can't do anything but play ball, rap and act like animals." These are phrases that are embedding in the spirits of many people. They see this hateful ideology as gospel. Each day hatred is becoming more acceptable and compassion and love is fading away rapidly.
It is vital that we realize that diversity (race, language, complexion) is a beautiful thing. We should never feel superior to anyone. God created all of us equally. Hatred will only poison the world—not heal it. Keep in mind that the race or ethnicity you hate the most just might be running through your veins. After all, we did all come from Adam and Eve.
“Whoever claims to love God yet hates a brother or sister is a liar. For whoever does not love their brother and sister, whom they have seen, cannot love God, whom they have not seen.”—1 John 4:20
The brutally injured man refrains, telling the officer he can't because his arm might be broken. The officer pulls out his gun and tells him to put his hands up. As the man attempts to raise his arms, intense pain shoots through them and he immediately stumbles toward the officer and is shot six times in the chest. The man falls on his back and crimson begins to stain his clothes and the ground. The officer's partner runs out of the electronics store to see his partner watching the man's essence slowly detach from his body. As the man goes into perpetual sleep we call death, your mind begins to wonder.
You ask yourself if your Ivy League education, six figure salary, Fortune 500 job and elite pedigree has exempted you and your family from ever experiencing such cruelty. "I mean I've never had to deal with racism before..." As soon as you make that statement, you know it's a lie. You know that no matter what you accomplish mentally, spiritually or financially, your caramel skin will always be seen as inferior and a threat to the masses.
"We are taking 'our' country back." "All they want to do is have babies and end up on welfare." "They can't do anything but play ball, rap and act like animals." These are phrases that are embedding in the spirits of many people. They see this hateful ideology as gospel. Each day hatred is becoming more acceptable and compassion and love is fading away rapidly.
It is vital that we realize that diversity (race, language, complexion) is a beautiful thing. We should never feel superior to anyone. God created all of us equally. Hatred will only poison the world—not heal it. Keep in mind that the race or ethnicity you hate the most just might be running through your veins. After all, we did all come from Adam and Eve.
“Whoever claims to love God yet hates a brother or sister is a liar. For whoever does not love their brother and sister, whom they have seen, cannot love God, whom they have not seen.”—1 John 4:20
Are Past Relationships Affecting Your Emotions?
You have been going out with your boyfriend Jamal for the past six months and each moment has been amazing. He’s super hilarious, intelligent, respectful and extremely sexy. He adores you and has every intention of marrying you in the near future. There’s just one problem—you have major trust issues.
“Baby I can’t believe you acted like that. I told you that I was just telling the waitress thank you for the great service.” Jamal says, following you into your kitchen. “You’re lying! You wanted to get her number didn’t you!? You think she’s prettier than me,” you scream, throwing your purse his way. “Kayla I told you what happened. What is wrong with you? Why don’t you trust me? What do I have to do to get you to trust me completely.” He yells, blocking you from leaving the room. “Kayla I love you and I want us to be together forever, but if you keep this up, we will never make it down the aisle. When are you going to realize that I’m not going to hurt you like those other guys did in the past,” he asks, unblocking the doorway and walking toward your front door. As Jamal walks out of the door, you realize that your past pain is smothering the pure love and respect you have for him. If you don’t let go of your past, you’ll never experience real happiness.
Holding grudges is as natural as drinking water for some of us. We allow the negativity that is pain to seep into our confidence, trust and tranquility. We forget to treat every person and relationship fairly. We embrace paranoia instead of wisdom.
If we ever want to be in healthy relationships, we must learn from heartbreak without allowing Satan to create emotional complexes in our lives. God wants us to look at every new relationship as an opportunity to love, learn and mature. He wants us to embrace positive energy.
“A fool gives full vent to his spirit, but a wise man quietly holds it back.”—Proverbs 29:11
“Baby I can’t believe you acted like that. I told you that I was just telling the waitress thank you for the great service.” Jamal says, following you into your kitchen. “You’re lying! You wanted to get her number didn’t you!? You think she’s prettier than me,” you scream, throwing your purse his way. “Kayla I told you what happened. What is wrong with you? Why don’t you trust me? What do I have to do to get you to trust me completely.” He yells, blocking you from leaving the room. “Kayla I love you and I want us to be together forever, but if you keep this up, we will never make it down the aisle. When are you going to realize that I’m not going to hurt you like those other guys did in the past,” he asks, unblocking the doorway and walking toward your front door. As Jamal walks out of the door, you realize that your past pain is smothering the pure love and respect you have for him. If you don’t let go of your past, you’ll never experience real happiness.
Holding grudges is as natural as drinking water for some of us. We allow the negativity that is pain to seep into our confidence, trust and tranquility. We forget to treat every person and relationship fairly. We embrace paranoia instead of wisdom.
If we ever want to be in healthy relationships, we must learn from heartbreak without allowing Satan to create emotional complexes in our lives. God wants us to look at every new relationship as an opportunity to love, learn and mature. He wants us to embrace positive energy.
“A fool gives full vent to his spirit, but a wise man quietly holds it back.”—Proverbs 29:11
FAITHFUL TESTIMONY: Interview With Mind of a Diva Creator Jen Baker
Last week I was super blessed to interview the talented, inspiring and graceful creator of the mentally and spiritually empowering blog Mind of a Diva Jen Baker. The Dallas, TX native and Texas State University grad shared how her spiritual journey and passion for writing have inspired her to create her blog and focus on redefining the term “diva” to embrace women’s strength, virtue and independence.
What inspired you to create your blog?
Mind of a Diva started after I graduated from college and was searching for a way to get a job writing for a newspaper. I had experience blogging from college, but I didn’t feel led to continue that blog. I started praying for Jesus to give me some direction about what I should write about and he told me to write what I know. I replied that all I know is my life, and that’s how it started. He actually told me to call it Mind of a Diva in a dream.
How long have you had your blog?
I started my blog in 2010, so I've had it for six years now.
What made you want to focus on mental and spiritual empowerment?
I was led by God to cover many of the subjects I write about on the website. I believe that it’s important for there to be websites that speak about living for Christ and the highs and lows of this walk from the perspective of a millennial woman. When I looked online there were not many sites that are sharing the point of view that I am, and I love that we’re blazing a new path. I’m happy and blessed to have to been called to share Jesus’ message and to have the opportunity to serve.
Have you always been interested in writing?
As far back as I can remember it’s been a passion of mine. I remember writing stories when I was young. Plus, one of my favorite childhood memories was going to work with my dad when he worked for a company that owned the Dallas Morning News. I loved seeing how the newspaper was made and knowing that those stories made a difference.
What do you like most about having your own blog?
I love being able to share my stories and experiences and to be able to motivate and empower other women through my writing. I love being able to write what matters to me. Creating this brand has been an enlightening experience. I learned so much about myself as a writer and as a woman. Plus, creating this site has given me the opportunity to meet wonderful people worldwide and grow closer to Christ.
How has your blog helped you grow spiritually and mentally?
It’s a really great release for me. It’s great to be able to put something out there and have people understand it and say that they are going through the same thing. It confirms that I’m doing what He (God) told me to do. Having my blog has also helped me with my Bible study. I do a lot of research because I don’t want to take any scripture out of context. God has revealed the meaning of many scriptures to me. I love to verify everything by the Holy Spirit.
What is your favorite scripture?
I love so many passages that it's hard for me to narrow it down to one, but I will share my top two. The first one is Luke 1:45. In my quiet time, the Lord has opened my eyes to many things, and I know that I have to believe in Him and His word. This verse reminds me that by faith I will see things come together for my good. My other favorite scripture (group of scriptures) is 1 Corinthians 9:24-27 because Paul is amazing and these verses remind me to be diligent in my faith walk. We have to fight our flesh, lies of the enemy, and temptation. Being a part of the body of Christ is a race that we have to compete in daily, and I have to submit my mind and body to do the work of His kingdom.
What is the overall message you want girls and ladies to receive when they visit your blog?
I want them to see the beauty of having a relationship with God. I want them know about loving themselves. I want them to know that they are enough and worthy of being great. The enemy (Satan) tells us that we have to wear tons of fake hair and makeup; we have to throw up all of our food in order to be sexy. We don’t need to wear booty shorts and tank tops to get a man or turn some heads. And I also want ladies to know that we are all sisters and not each other’s competition.
What is the ultimate goal you would like to achieve in relation to your blog?
My goal is to keep producing my blog the way He (God) sees fit. I want to continue to touch women with the messages He (God) gives me. In the future, I would also like to write a book and do motivational speaking.
Jen’s testimony is a beautiful example of how we can combine our bold and beautiful faith in God with our talents to create authentic outlets that can entertain, unify and uplift women. We can be unstoppable if we put God first in our minds, bodies and spirits.
Jennifer Baker is a Dallas, Texas native and a graduate of Texas State University. She received a bachelor’s degree in Mass Communication and English to prepare herself to pursue a career as an author and public speaker. During her collegiate career, she wrote for the school newspaper and published several articles with one of her articles making the front page.
In her last semester of college, Jennifer’s studies led her to become involved with blogging and social media. She created her first blog that was based on entertainment news, but after a while she felt a need to write about something more meaningful. After praying for inspiration and guidance, the idea to create a website geared towards young women turned into Mind of a Diva. Three years later she manages, writes, and continues to expand the reach of her brand. Aside from working on her website she enjoys spending time with her family and friends, being involved in her church, volunteering, watching TV, and shopping. She now resides in Houston with her family.
Website: MIndofaDiva.com
Facebook: Mind of a Diva
Twitter: @MindofaDiva
Pinterest: Mind of a Diva
What inspired you to create your blog?
Mind of a Diva started after I graduated from college and was searching for a way to get a job writing for a newspaper. I had experience blogging from college, but I didn’t feel led to continue that blog. I started praying for Jesus to give me some direction about what I should write about and he told me to write what I know. I replied that all I know is my life, and that’s how it started. He actually told me to call it Mind of a Diva in a dream.
How long have you had your blog?
I started my blog in 2010, so I've had it for six years now.
What made you want to focus on mental and spiritual empowerment?
I was led by God to cover many of the subjects I write about on the website. I believe that it’s important for there to be websites that speak about living for Christ and the highs and lows of this walk from the perspective of a millennial woman. When I looked online there were not many sites that are sharing the point of view that I am, and I love that we’re blazing a new path. I’m happy and blessed to have to been called to share Jesus’ message and to have the opportunity to serve.
Have you always been interested in writing?
As far back as I can remember it’s been a passion of mine. I remember writing stories when I was young. Plus, one of my favorite childhood memories was going to work with my dad when he worked for a company that owned the Dallas Morning News. I loved seeing how the newspaper was made and knowing that those stories made a difference.
What do you like most about having your own blog?
I love being able to share my stories and experiences and to be able to motivate and empower other women through my writing. I love being able to write what matters to me. Creating this brand has been an enlightening experience. I learned so much about myself as a writer and as a woman. Plus, creating this site has given me the opportunity to meet wonderful people worldwide and grow closer to Christ.
How has your blog helped you grow spiritually and mentally?
It’s a really great release for me. It’s great to be able to put something out there and have people understand it and say that they are going through the same thing. It confirms that I’m doing what He (God) told me to do. Having my blog has also helped me with my Bible study. I do a lot of research because I don’t want to take any scripture out of context. God has revealed the meaning of many scriptures to me. I love to verify everything by the Holy Spirit.
What is your favorite scripture?
I love so many passages that it's hard for me to narrow it down to one, but I will share my top two. The first one is Luke 1:45. In my quiet time, the Lord has opened my eyes to many things, and I know that I have to believe in Him and His word. This verse reminds me that by faith I will see things come together for my good. My other favorite scripture (group of scriptures) is 1 Corinthians 9:24-27 because Paul is amazing and these verses remind me to be diligent in my faith walk. We have to fight our flesh, lies of the enemy, and temptation. Being a part of the body of Christ is a race that we have to compete in daily, and I have to submit my mind and body to do the work of His kingdom.
What is the overall message you want girls and ladies to receive when they visit your blog?
I want them to see the beauty of having a relationship with God. I want them know about loving themselves. I want them to know that they are enough and worthy of being great. The enemy (Satan) tells us that we have to wear tons of fake hair and makeup; we have to throw up all of our food in order to be sexy. We don’t need to wear booty shorts and tank tops to get a man or turn some heads. And I also want ladies to know that we are all sisters and not each other’s competition.
What is the ultimate goal you would like to achieve in relation to your blog?
My goal is to keep producing my blog the way He (God) sees fit. I want to continue to touch women with the messages He (God) gives me. In the future, I would also like to write a book and do motivational speaking.
Jen’s testimony is a beautiful example of how we can combine our bold and beautiful faith in God with our talents to create authentic outlets that can entertain, unify and uplift women. We can be unstoppable if we put God first in our minds, bodies and spirits.
Jennifer Baker is a Dallas, Texas native and a graduate of Texas State University. She received a bachelor’s degree in Mass Communication and English to prepare herself to pursue a career as an author and public speaker. During her collegiate career, she wrote for the school newspaper and published several articles with one of her articles making the front page.
In her last semester of college, Jennifer’s studies led her to become involved with blogging and social media. She created her first blog that was based on entertainment news, but after a while she felt a need to write about something more meaningful. After praying for inspiration and guidance, the idea to create a website geared towards young women turned into Mind of a Diva. Three years later she manages, writes, and continues to expand the reach of her brand. Aside from working on her website she enjoys spending time with her family and friends, being involved in her church, volunteering, watching TV, and shopping. She now resides in Houston with her family.
Website: MIndofaDiva.com
Facebook: Mind of a Diva
Twitter: @MindofaDiva
Pinterest: Mind of a Diva
Do You Hold Onto Dead Relationships?
It's been a month since you've spoken to or hung out with your "best friend." She refuses to call you and every time you call her, she says she's going to call you back and never does. When you invite her to events she comes up with lame excuses on why she's unavailable. You finally begin to give up on your friendship until you run into her at your favorite local grocery store.
"Stacy what are you doing here? I thought you hated this store," you say, surprised to see your incognito friend. "Oh my gosh Tyra you scared me," Stacy says, trying to regroup. "So what's been up? Why have you been avoiding me?" "Girl nobody's been ignoring you. I've just been super busy," she lies, chuckling nervously. "Maybe we could go to a spa and have a girl's day," you say eagerly. Stacy hesitates before answering. "Okay that sounds like fun. Just call me later and we'll talk about it," she says, walking away from you. You know she's lying as soon as she walks away, but you are hopeful that you can mend your friendship.
Throughout life, we will experience numerous relationship ups and downs. One minute our lives are overflowing with flourishing friendships and the next minute we are alone and wondering what happened. When our loved ones suddenly disappear out of our lives, we sometimes think that we need to love them harder so they will come back into our lives. We ignore the fact their time in our lives has passed.
We must recognize and accept when relationships (friends and/or family) are over. We must respect when God is closing relationship doors in our lives. We have to understand that some relationships are not meant to be for a lifetime, only a few chapters in our book. It is imperative that we focus on the authentic relationships we still have. Those will never die.
“Do not be deceived: ‘Bad company ruins good morals.’”-1 Corinthians 15:33
"Stacy what are you doing here? I thought you hated this store," you say, surprised to see your incognito friend. "Oh my gosh Tyra you scared me," Stacy says, trying to regroup. "So what's been up? Why have you been avoiding me?" "Girl nobody's been ignoring you. I've just been super busy," she lies, chuckling nervously. "Maybe we could go to a spa and have a girl's day," you say eagerly. Stacy hesitates before answering. "Okay that sounds like fun. Just call me later and we'll talk about it," she says, walking away from you. You know she's lying as soon as she walks away, but you are hopeful that you can mend your friendship.
Throughout life, we will experience numerous relationship ups and downs. One minute our lives are overflowing with flourishing friendships and the next minute we are alone and wondering what happened. When our loved ones suddenly disappear out of our lives, we sometimes think that we need to love them harder so they will come back into our lives. We ignore the fact their time in our lives has passed.
We must recognize and accept when relationships (friends and/or family) are over. We must respect when God is closing relationship doors in our lives. We have to understand that some relationships are not meant to be for a lifetime, only a few chapters in our book. It is imperative that we focus on the authentic relationships we still have. Those will never die.
“Do not be deceived: ‘Bad company ruins good morals.’”-1 Corinthians 15:33
POEM: Ferocious Faithfulness
I am experiencing aggressive spiritual negativity that's trying to devour my endless sass, seasoned confidence and potent determination.
I am experiencing stress that's trying to kill my undeniable talents, pure potential and blooming opportunities.
I am experiencing jealousy that's trying to tarnish my loyal character, unfiltered honesty and peaceful nature.
I'm fighting back with God's marvelous protection.
I'm fighting back with humbleness that allows me to be silent around worthless negativity and to speak with wisdom and class when the opportunity arises.
I'm fighting back with perpetual determination to be nothing less than spectacular because God did not create me to have low standards.
I'm fighting back with commanding patience to allow God to have His excellent way in my life because He never does anything halfway.
No matter what I experience, I won't be broken.
I don't wear weakness.
It clashes with my shoes.
I'm fighting back with FEROCIOUS FAITHFULNESS.
We are constantly bombarded with messages (internal and external) telling us to give up—our dreams are too big or we don't deserve to be respected or happy. We must know that God did not create us to have spirits of doubt or hopelessness. He wants us to trust Him and know that we deserve to achieve physical, mental and spiritual success. He wants us to be ladies of faith.
“For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will hear you. You will seek me and find me, when you seek me with all your heart.—Jeremiah 29:11-13
I am experiencing stress that's trying to kill my undeniable talents, pure potential and blooming opportunities.
I am experiencing jealousy that's trying to tarnish my loyal character, unfiltered honesty and peaceful nature.
I'm fighting back with God's marvelous protection.
I'm fighting back with humbleness that allows me to be silent around worthless negativity and to speak with wisdom and class when the opportunity arises.
I'm fighting back with perpetual determination to be nothing less than spectacular because God did not create me to have low standards.
I'm fighting back with commanding patience to allow God to have His excellent way in my life because He never does anything halfway.
No matter what I experience, I won't be broken.
I don't wear weakness.
It clashes with my shoes.
I'm fighting back with FEROCIOUS FAITHFULNESS.
We are constantly bombarded with messages (internal and external) telling us to give up—our dreams are too big or we don't deserve to be respected or happy. We must know that God did not create us to have spirits of doubt or hopelessness. He wants us to trust Him and know that we deserve to achieve physical, mental and spiritual success. He wants us to be ladies of faith.
“For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will hear you. You will seek me and find me, when you seek me with all your heart.—Jeremiah 29:11-13
Are Your Issues Crippling Your Life?
Your home and cell phone have been ringing off the hook for almost 12 hours straight, but you have successfully ignored every call. You know each call is about the same thing-you cheating on your fiancé. As you ignore your phone's vibrations, your mother begins knocking on your door and calling your name nonstop.
As soon as you open the door, your mother brushes past you angrily and yells, "Tia what in the world is your problem? How could you cheat on Brian? What did he do to deserve such disrespect a few weeks before your wedding? If you didn't want him, why didn't you just breakup with him?" "Look mom it just happened. I didn't plan on cheating. I told him I was sorry," you say nonchalantly, cutting up bell pepper on your black marble kitchen counter.
"Sorry...that's all you have to say? This didn't just happen. This is a result of the issues you have with your father. I told you before you got engaged that you needed to deal with your issues before they deal with you. You have destroyed a wonderful relationship with a wonderful man because you are holding so much anger in your heart. If you ever want to experience pure happiness, you must release the anger in your heart..."
It is extremely common for us to hold and nurture pain, fear and anger. Most of us would rather direct our emotional baggage onto innocent parties instead of acknowledging that we have a problem. We become content letting our past ruin our present and future.
It is imperative that we recognize when our past negative experiences are holding our minds and spirits captive. We must realize that our past is meant to enlighten, not break us or make us bitter. God wants us to allow Him to liberate us from our issues (big or small). He wants us to be free-physically, mentally and spiritually.
“Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.”-Romans 12:2
As soon as you open the door, your mother brushes past you angrily and yells, "Tia what in the world is your problem? How could you cheat on Brian? What did he do to deserve such disrespect a few weeks before your wedding? If you didn't want him, why didn't you just breakup with him?" "Look mom it just happened. I didn't plan on cheating. I told him I was sorry," you say nonchalantly, cutting up bell pepper on your black marble kitchen counter.
"Sorry...that's all you have to say? This didn't just happen. This is a result of the issues you have with your father. I told you before you got engaged that you needed to deal with your issues before they deal with you. You have destroyed a wonderful relationship with a wonderful man because you are holding so much anger in your heart. If you ever want to experience pure happiness, you must release the anger in your heart..."
It is extremely common for us to hold and nurture pain, fear and anger. Most of us would rather direct our emotional baggage onto innocent parties instead of acknowledging that we have a problem. We become content letting our past ruin our present and future.
It is imperative that we recognize when our past negative experiences are holding our minds and spirits captive. We must realize that our past is meant to enlighten, not break us or make us bitter. God wants us to allow Him to liberate us from our issues (big or small). He wants us to be free-physically, mentally and spiritually.
“Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.”-Romans 12:2
Are You Afraid To Speak Up For Yourself?
You are having a ball floating on a giant rubber ducky inner tube in your brother's massive sea green infinity pool. You're laughing and joking around with his friends until your face turns red. Everything is sensational—until his fiancée Kerry shows up.
"Mya don't you think you're a little old to be playing on lame flotation devices," Kerry asks, inspecting you with a frown on her face. "You're never too old to have a little fun," you say in the kindest tone you can muster up. "Well I think you look ridiculous,” she says, as she begins walking away. "Oh and Mya I advise you to wear a different swimsuit the next time you come over since you've gained a little weight in the hips. No need to scare the guests,” she adds. As she walks away, you contemplate telling her off with some of your best one-liners. A few seconds pass and you reluctantly decide to let it go. You don't want to cause your brother any drama because you know how much he loves her. So you remain quiet trying to figure out if you should speak or be silent.
Sometimes we all feel pressure to stay quiet while others torment us continuously. We are so fearful of rocking the boat, that we allow our spirits to be devoured by negativity. We embrace the poisonous habit of allowing other people's issues to become our own.
It's imperative that we realize that there is a big difference between knowing that expressing your opinion all the time isn't worth it versus being a pushover. God expects us to respect others as well as ourselves. He doesn't want us to entertain disrespect at the expense of our mental and spiritual health. God wants us to shine bright and speak up for ourselves in a classy way. He wants us to be faithful and fierce.
“Let your speech always be gracious, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how you ought to answer each person.”—Colossians 4:6
"Mya don't you think you're a little old to be playing on lame flotation devices," Kerry asks, inspecting you with a frown on her face. "You're never too old to have a little fun," you say in the kindest tone you can muster up. "Well I think you look ridiculous,” she says, as she begins walking away. "Oh and Mya I advise you to wear a different swimsuit the next time you come over since you've gained a little weight in the hips. No need to scare the guests,” she adds. As she walks away, you contemplate telling her off with some of your best one-liners. A few seconds pass and you reluctantly decide to let it go. You don't want to cause your brother any drama because you know how much he loves her. So you remain quiet trying to figure out if you should speak or be silent.
Sometimes we all feel pressure to stay quiet while others torment us continuously. We are so fearful of rocking the boat, that we allow our spirits to be devoured by negativity. We embrace the poisonous habit of allowing other people's issues to become our own.
It's imperative that we realize that there is a big difference between knowing that expressing your opinion all the time isn't worth it versus being a pushover. God expects us to respect others as well as ourselves. He doesn't want us to entertain disrespect at the expense of our mental and spiritual health. God wants us to shine bright and speak up for ourselves in a classy way. He wants us to be faithful and fierce.
“Let your speech always be gracious, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how you ought to answer each person.”—Colossians 4:6
Are You Confident Or Cocky?
You have been trying to get a job at your favorite magazine for two years. They finally have an opening in your field and you jump at the chance to work for them. You’ve gone through two rounds of interviews and the hiring communications director has called you in for a third. You are ecstatic.
“Toni thanks so much for coming in again and being so patient with our hiring process. We feel it’s very important to thoroughly get to know our candidates’ work ethics, talents, experiences and personalities. It’s very clear to us that you are beyond talented, and eager to work hard for our magazine,” Evelyn, the communications director says genuinely. As she continues complimenting you, you smile inside just waiting for her to officially welcome you to the magazine family. “Toni the reason why I called you here is it to tell you that you didn’t get the job.” Your mouth drops immediately. “What are you talking about? Who could possibly be better than me? I’m beyond talented. Do you know how many companies would love for me to work for them,” you snap.
“That’s exactly why we decided not to hire you. Toni you are way too cocky. You think you are better than most of the people around you. You are not humble, willing to take direction or encourage your team. You are without a doubt the most talented out of all of our candidates but your attitude is the worst. I suggest you learn the difference between being confident versus being cocky…”
It is becoming more and more normal for us to put each other down in order to build ourselves up. We are told that being secure means you must embody aggression. Humbleness and character discipline are becoming a thing of the past.
It is extremely important that we know the difference between being self-assured and being arrogant. If God blesses us with certain positive qualities and talents, we must appreciate and be secure in them without believing we are superior to others. If we are to be our best, we must not alienate others as we try to become successful. God wants us to embrace humble security and repel snobbish negativity.
“Do nothing from rivalry or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others.”-Philippians 2:3-4
“Toni thanks so much for coming in again and being so patient with our hiring process. We feel it’s very important to thoroughly get to know our candidates’ work ethics, talents, experiences and personalities. It’s very clear to us that you are beyond talented, and eager to work hard for our magazine,” Evelyn, the communications director says genuinely. As she continues complimenting you, you smile inside just waiting for her to officially welcome you to the magazine family. “Toni the reason why I called you here is it to tell you that you didn’t get the job.” Your mouth drops immediately. “What are you talking about? Who could possibly be better than me? I’m beyond talented. Do you know how many companies would love for me to work for them,” you snap.
“That’s exactly why we decided not to hire you. Toni you are way too cocky. You think you are better than most of the people around you. You are not humble, willing to take direction or encourage your team. You are without a doubt the most talented out of all of our candidates but your attitude is the worst. I suggest you learn the difference between being confident versus being cocky…”
It is becoming more and more normal for us to put each other down in order to build ourselves up. We are told that being secure means you must embody aggression. Humbleness and character discipline are becoming a thing of the past.
It is extremely important that we know the difference between being self-assured and being arrogant. If God blesses us with certain positive qualities and talents, we must appreciate and be secure in them without believing we are superior to others. If we are to be our best, we must not alienate others as we try to become successful. God wants us to embrace humble security and repel snobbish negativity.
“Do nothing from rivalry or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others.”-Philippians 2:3-4
Are You A Material Girl?
You’ve been up since six this morning packing up your whole “glamorous” world that resides in your apartment to move into a plush condo you can’t afford. You happily pack up your vast assortment of designer shoes as your doorbell rings. Your best friend Zana zooms through the door as soon as you open it.
“What took you so long to open the door? You knew I had all of these boxes in my hands. I was about to drop them,” she says, placing several medium-sized cardboard boxes on the floor. “Girl I’m so sorry. I’m just so excited to be moving. I finally get to live in the type of place I deserve—renting is for the birds,” you say, sitting on your cream living room carpet closing another box. “Look I’m all for owning your own place. I just think you should only purchase what you can afford. What’s the point of buying something and you end up starving to death to maintain it or you just lose it all together,” Zana asks, joining you on the floor.
“Look I have no intention of living some lame boring life. If I have to charge up a few credit cards and take out a few loans to live it up, I will. Remember you have to be what you want to attract. And I want to attract a whole lot,” you wink. “Speaking of attraction, what happened to Tristan? He was super cute and successful.” “He had the nerve to try to buy me an outfit out of JCPenny. Can you believe that? Girl I dropped him quickly,” you answer, putting tape on a box filled with purses you maxed out two credit cards to purchase.
“See that’s your problem. You’re basing relationships on shallow principles. There is nothing wrong with Tristan. He’s super handsome, he adores you, he’s respectful and he’s a successful engineer. You ruined a great relationship because he doesn’t like to blow money like you do. At least he actually has the money to splurge if he wanted to. You are broke and trying to be something you’re not. Maybe you could learn some money saving tips from him and stop being so materialistic.”
Traditional and social media makes it seem imperative that we buy the “hottest” and latest beauty, fashion and big ticket items whether we can afford it or not. Society continuously hypnotizes us with the idea that our worth is attached to our material accomplishments. If we don’t conform to this ideology, we are seen as lame and low-class.
It’s vital that we realize that our worth is not attached to perishable things, but our spiritual health. The most important thing we should nurture and focus on is our relationship status with God and his will for our lives. We must be aware that there is a distinct difference between working hard and treating yourself to nice things and being completely consumed with material things. God wants us to not judge ourselves or others solely based on our external accomplishments. He wants us to look within and see the treasure—spiritual treasure.
“Do not lay up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy and where thieves break in and steal, but lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroys and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.”—Matthew 6:19-21
“What took you so long to open the door? You knew I had all of these boxes in my hands. I was about to drop them,” she says, placing several medium-sized cardboard boxes on the floor. “Girl I’m so sorry. I’m just so excited to be moving. I finally get to live in the type of place I deserve—renting is for the birds,” you say, sitting on your cream living room carpet closing another box. “Look I’m all for owning your own place. I just think you should only purchase what you can afford. What’s the point of buying something and you end up starving to death to maintain it or you just lose it all together,” Zana asks, joining you on the floor.
“Look I have no intention of living some lame boring life. If I have to charge up a few credit cards and take out a few loans to live it up, I will. Remember you have to be what you want to attract. And I want to attract a whole lot,” you wink. “Speaking of attraction, what happened to Tristan? He was super cute and successful.” “He had the nerve to try to buy me an outfit out of JCPenny. Can you believe that? Girl I dropped him quickly,” you answer, putting tape on a box filled with purses you maxed out two credit cards to purchase.
“See that’s your problem. You’re basing relationships on shallow principles. There is nothing wrong with Tristan. He’s super handsome, he adores you, he’s respectful and he’s a successful engineer. You ruined a great relationship because he doesn’t like to blow money like you do. At least he actually has the money to splurge if he wanted to. You are broke and trying to be something you’re not. Maybe you could learn some money saving tips from him and stop being so materialistic.”
Traditional and social media makes it seem imperative that we buy the “hottest” and latest beauty, fashion and big ticket items whether we can afford it or not. Society continuously hypnotizes us with the idea that our worth is attached to our material accomplishments. If we don’t conform to this ideology, we are seen as lame and low-class.
It’s vital that we realize that our worth is not attached to perishable things, but our spiritual health. The most important thing we should nurture and focus on is our relationship status with God and his will for our lives. We must be aware that there is a distinct difference between working hard and treating yourself to nice things and being completely consumed with material things. God wants us to not judge ourselves or others solely based on our external accomplishments. He wants us to look within and see the treasure—spiritual treasure.
“Do not lay up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy and where thieves break in and steal, but lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroys and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.”—Matthew 6:19-21
NEW POEM: Emotional Illusions
I experience sincere smiles, gentle touches and pure laughter.
I experience heartfelt gifts, exotic dinners and Thai-Dyed Orchids.
I experience honey-dipped sunsets, glittery nights and angelic sunrises.
I bask in our stimulating conversations, distinctive opinions and tantalizing aspirations.
I bask in our unadulterated honesty, perpetual loyalty and unbreakable consistency.
I bask in our unrefined encouragement, obligatory cautions and essential guidance.
I’m enthralled with your authentic attraction and intense passion for me.
I’m enthralled with your spiritual bond and rhythmic connection to me.
I’m enthralled with your…
…And then…
And then I wake up.
I wake up from my dream—my desire.
I wake up to polluted intentions, cold frowns and verbal lashes.
I wake up to eternal infidelity, sour lies and ignored feelings.
I wake up to empty promises, ferocious curses and insurmountable hurt.
I realize good was never real.
It had been created by my blinding illusions…
Insincere illusions…
EMOTIONAL ILLUSIONS.
It’s imperative that we ladies recognize the difference between the relationships we are in versus the ones we wish we had. Sometimes we get so caught up falling in love with the idea of love, we forget about reality. We must never settle for a guy based on our wishes of who he could become. We must realize that we deserve real love—a love that is better than our imaginations could ever create.
“So flee youthful passions and pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace, along with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart.”—2 Timothy 2:22
I experience heartfelt gifts, exotic dinners and Thai-Dyed Orchids.
I experience honey-dipped sunsets, glittery nights and angelic sunrises.
I bask in our stimulating conversations, distinctive opinions and tantalizing aspirations.
I bask in our unadulterated honesty, perpetual loyalty and unbreakable consistency.
I bask in our unrefined encouragement, obligatory cautions and essential guidance.
I’m enthralled with your authentic attraction and intense passion for me.
I’m enthralled with your spiritual bond and rhythmic connection to me.
I’m enthralled with your…
…And then…
And then I wake up.
I wake up from my dream—my desire.
I wake up to polluted intentions, cold frowns and verbal lashes.
I wake up to eternal infidelity, sour lies and ignored feelings.
I wake up to empty promises, ferocious curses and insurmountable hurt.
I realize good was never real.
It had been created by my blinding illusions…
Insincere illusions…
EMOTIONAL ILLUSIONS.
It’s imperative that we ladies recognize the difference between the relationships we are in versus the ones we wish we had. Sometimes we get so caught up falling in love with the idea of love, we forget about reality. We must never settle for a guy based on our wishes of who he could become. We must realize that we deserve real love—a love that is better than our imaginations could ever create.
“So flee youthful passions and pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace, along with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart.”—2 Timothy 2:22
Are You Addicted To Technology?
You and your mother have been planning to spend a whole day together for a month and the day has finally arrived. You all have decided to go shopping for fresh fruits, vegetables and herbs at your local fresh market. Your mother is busy selecting the best produce while you type away on your phone. As you all walk to the car, you almost walk into a light post responding to a tweet.
“Carmen what is wrong with you? Why can’t you put your phone down,” your mother growls in frustration, getting into her red Lexus LS. “Look I’m sorry. I just needed to respond to some tweets for my job,” you respond, putting your seatbelt on. “Don’t blame this on your job. You’re always on your phone or tablet, and it has nothing to do with your job. You’re addicted to technology,” she says, driving back to your childhood home. “No I’m not. It’s just how everyone communicates these days. People don’t talk in person or on the phone anymore—they text, tweet, DM and IM,” you say, checking your email.
“Well isn’t that sad. You’re so busy ‘communicating’ you don’t communicate. You and I are supposed to be spending quality time together and you have completely ignored me. I’m your mother and you can’t take the time to even look at me. Isn’t that sad.” You immediately stop reading an email and look at your mother. It never occurred to you that you never spend real time with anyone because you are always on your phone or tablet. You were missing out on life.
Society has become consumed with technology. We if we couldn’t email, text, Youtube, tweet, Instagram or Snapchat, our minds would melt away into an abyss of perpetual chaos. We have allowed ourselves to become crippled by technology.
It’s vital that we recognize when something or someone has taken over our mind, body and/or spirits. It’s very easy for all of us to get strung out on technology and lose sight of what’s really important—real life. We must remember phones, tablets and laptops are meant to enhance, not replace authentic personal interaction and relationships (with people and God). We must know that it’s healthy for our minds to unplug and clear our spirits of unnecessary distractions.
“The end of all things is at hand; therefore be self-controlled and sober-minded for the sake of your prayers.”—1 Peter 4:7
“Carmen what is wrong with you? Why can’t you put your phone down,” your mother growls in frustration, getting into her red Lexus LS. “Look I’m sorry. I just needed to respond to some tweets for my job,” you respond, putting your seatbelt on. “Don’t blame this on your job. You’re always on your phone or tablet, and it has nothing to do with your job. You’re addicted to technology,” she says, driving back to your childhood home. “No I’m not. It’s just how everyone communicates these days. People don’t talk in person or on the phone anymore—they text, tweet, DM and IM,” you say, checking your email.
“Well isn’t that sad. You’re so busy ‘communicating’ you don’t communicate. You and I are supposed to be spending quality time together and you have completely ignored me. I’m your mother and you can’t take the time to even look at me. Isn’t that sad.” You immediately stop reading an email and look at your mother. It never occurred to you that you never spend real time with anyone because you are always on your phone or tablet. You were missing out on life.
Society has become consumed with technology. We if we couldn’t email, text, Youtube, tweet, Instagram or Snapchat, our minds would melt away into an abyss of perpetual chaos. We have allowed ourselves to become crippled by technology.
It’s vital that we recognize when something or someone has taken over our mind, body and/or spirits. It’s very easy for all of us to get strung out on technology and lose sight of what’s really important—real life. We must remember phones, tablets and laptops are meant to enhance, not replace authentic personal interaction and relationships (with people and God). We must know that it’s healthy for our minds to unplug and clear our spirits of unnecessary distractions.
“The end of all things is at hand; therefore be self-controlled and sober-minded for the sake of your prayers.”—1 Peter 4:7
Do You Wish You Were Someone Else?
You are on vacation with your three girlfriends at a spa and wellness retreat. You all have enjoyed an array of massages, mud treatments and sauna girl gossip time. Everything is going perfectly until your friends want to go to a yoga class. You are mortified because you don’t want anyone to see you in tight yoga clothing—you hate your body.
“Nikee why aren’t you dressed? The yoga class starts in ten minutes,” Krystal asks, walking into your bedroom. “I’m not going. Have fun without me,” you say, staring out of your bay window. “Why? What’s wrong?” “Look I’m not about to embarrass myself by being around a ton of beautifully shaped women. We’ll hangout when y’all get back,” you snap. “What are you talking about? How are you going to embarrass yourself? And since when don’t you have a nice body? There’s nothing wrong with you,” Krystal says, walking closer to you while putting her hair into a topknot.
“That’s easy for you to say. You have a six pack and don’t have to worry about your stomach spilling out of your pants every time you sit down. You don’t have to worry about your thighs rubbing together or your arms jiggling when they move. You have a perfect body. You, Natalie and Haley all have perfect bodies,” you whine, still not looking her way. Krystal turns you toward her and says, “Okay first of all I don’t and have never had a six pack. Second, there’s nothing wrong with you. Women are getting plastic surgery to get the full breast and butt you were born with. You have a beautiful face, body and spirit. When are you going to realize that you are good enough?”
“I’m too fat, thin, short, tall, shapely, flat-chested…” These are just a few issues all of us have or are dealing with. Every time we look in the mirror we find something that we don’t like and want to change. Some of us take drastic measures to fulfill “our” fantasies of what we think is beautiful or acceptable to society. We focus so much on our physical selves that we forget how it’s affecting our spirits.
It’s imperative that we remember that God created all of us to look, think and act differently. He wants us to embrace our uniqueness, not try to be like other people. He wants us to know the difference between wanting to improve ourselves (losing weight to be healthier, being well-groomed, etc.) and trying to be someone we’re not (getting plastic surgery, starving oneself to be thin, etc.). He wants us to know that the only thing that really needs to change is how we see ourselves. We are marvelous beings that deserve self-love.
“He that getteth wisdom loveth his own soul: he that keepeth understanding shall find good.”—Proverbs 19:8
“Nikee why aren’t you dressed? The yoga class starts in ten minutes,” Krystal asks, walking into your bedroom. “I’m not going. Have fun without me,” you say, staring out of your bay window. “Why? What’s wrong?” “Look I’m not about to embarrass myself by being around a ton of beautifully shaped women. We’ll hangout when y’all get back,” you snap. “What are you talking about? How are you going to embarrass yourself? And since when don’t you have a nice body? There’s nothing wrong with you,” Krystal says, walking closer to you while putting her hair into a topknot.
“That’s easy for you to say. You have a six pack and don’t have to worry about your stomach spilling out of your pants every time you sit down. You don’t have to worry about your thighs rubbing together or your arms jiggling when they move. You have a perfect body. You, Natalie and Haley all have perfect bodies,” you whine, still not looking her way. Krystal turns you toward her and says, “Okay first of all I don’t and have never had a six pack. Second, there’s nothing wrong with you. Women are getting plastic surgery to get the full breast and butt you were born with. You have a beautiful face, body and spirit. When are you going to realize that you are good enough?”
“I’m too fat, thin, short, tall, shapely, flat-chested…” These are just a few issues all of us have or are dealing with. Every time we look in the mirror we find something that we don’t like and want to change. Some of us take drastic measures to fulfill “our” fantasies of what we think is beautiful or acceptable to society. We focus so much on our physical selves that we forget how it’s affecting our spirits.
It’s imperative that we remember that God created all of us to look, think and act differently. He wants us to embrace our uniqueness, not try to be like other people. He wants us to know the difference between wanting to improve ourselves (losing weight to be healthier, being well-groomed, etc.) and trying to be someone we’re not (getting plastic surgery, starving oneself to be thin, etc.). He wants us to know that the only thing that really needs to change is how we see ourselves. We are marvelous beings that deserve self-love.
“He that getteth wisdom loveth his own soul: he that keepeth understanding shall find good.”—Proverbs 19:8
Are You A Gossip Girl?
You are thirty minutes late for your best friend Tami’s private belly dancing class that you planned for her birthday. As soon as you arrive at the studio, your friend Kya swings the door open in disgust. “Where have you been? We have been waiting on you and you know the instructor charges by the hour.” “I’m so sorry but I was on the phone with Keisha and she told me that Rhea told her that Farrah told her that Tami’s man was coming out of a hotel room with some girl late last night,” you say energetically.
Kya immediately grabs you by the arm and forcefully brings you into the changing room. “What is wrong with you? Why would you come in here blabbing about that foolishness and you don’t even know if it’s true,” she asks in disgust. “Look I’m sorry. I didn’t realize I was so loud but when I heard about Ron dippin’ out on Tami I just couldn’t keep it to myself. I think she should know.” “Know what? You don’t know if it’s true or not. You know Keisha and her friends lie constantly. Why would you want to hurt Tami like that—especially on her birthday? You need to stop gossiping and spreading so many rumors. If you’re not sure it’s true, keep your mouth shut. One day your mouth is going to get you in so much trouble.”
At some point in our lives, we’ve all been guilty of gossiping or listening to it. We listen to it on the radio as we drive to work and school. We watch it on TV as we eat our breakfast and take our lunch breaks. We read it on the hottest blogs and in the tabloids in the grocery store lines. We are addicted to getting information about someone’s “demise.”
It is vital that we be mindful of what we allow to pollute our minds and exit our mouths. God doesn’t want us to be so consumed with spreading other people’s business, that we neglect our own lives. He wants us to respect people’s privacy and be mindful of how gossip (true or false) can cause unnecessary drama in our lives and others. He doesn’t want us to be shallow busybodies. He wants us to be mature ladies.
“Whoever keeps his mouth and his tongue keeps himself out of trouble.”—Proverbs 21:23
Kya immediately grabs you by the arm and forcefully brings you into the changing room. “What is wrong with you? Why would you come in here blabbing about that foolishness and you don’t even know if it’s true,” she asks in disgust. “Look I’m sorry. I didn’t realize I was so loud but when I heard about Ron dippin’ out on Tami I just couldn’t keep it to myself. I think she should know.” “Know what? You don’t know if it’s true or not. You know Keisha and her friends lie constantly. Why would you want to hurt Tami like that—especially on her birthday? You need to stop gossiping and spreading so many rumors. If you’re not sure it’s true, keep your mouth shut. One day your mouth is going to get you in so much trouble.”
At some point in our lives, we’ve all been guilty of gossiping or listening to it. We listen to it on the radio as we drive to work and school. We watch it on TV as we eat our breakfast and take our lunch breaks. We read it on the hottest blogs and in the tabloids in the grocery store lines. We are addicted to getting information about someone’s “demise.”
It is vital that we be mindful of what we allow to pollute our minds and exit our mouths. God doesn’t want us to be so consumed with spreading other people’s business, that we neglect our own lives. He wants us to respect people’s privacy and be mindful of how gossip (true or false) can cause unnecessary drama in our lives and others. He doesn’t want us to be shallow busybodies. He wants us to be mature ladies.
“Whoever keeps his mouth and his tongue keeps himself out of trouble.”—Proverbs 21:23
Are You Addicted To Power?
Your boss has just called an emergency meeting in her office with you and the rest of the communications’ team. Everyone is nervous except for you. You know why she’s calling the meeting. It’s because of the information you gave her about Sara and Stephan.
“I’ll make this quick,” your boss Tamera says, sitting in her sleek black chair behind her glass desk. “It’s come to my attention that two of you have broken protocol. As you all know, it’s against our policy for team managers and associates to be in relationships with each other…” As Tamera continues explaining the company’s policy, you calmly cross your legs and a slight grin slowly forms on your face. “I’m sorry but I have no choice Sara but to suspend you without pay and Stephan you’re fired.
Everyone’s mouths drop and gasp in disbelieve accept yours. “Kim congratulations. You will be taking Stephan’s place as our new communications manager,” Tamera says, handing you a folder of Stephan’s latest assignments. You completely ignore all of the tears, yelling and finger-pointing around you. You are too busy internally celebrating getting yourself one step closer to the director position you’ve been eyeing since you first started. You totally dismiss your involvement in two peoples’ demise. You smile as you walk back to your cubicle thinking about whose toes you have to step on next to achieve your ultimate goal.
Embodying our impure desires is becoming more commonplace. Society says it’s okay to scheme, tell lies and create chaos if it gets us closer to fame, power or money. Being ruthless is becoming more acceptable than being a sincere and respectable lady.
It’s imperative that we realize that God can/will bless us with personal and professional success in HIS own time. He knows what blessings we can handle and when we can handle them. He doesn’t want us to tear anyone down so we can build ourselves up. That will only lead to severed relationships, bad karma and spiritual pollution. If we focus on God’s will for our lives instead of our desires for power, we are guaranteed to be blessed, at peace and fabulous.
“Whoever exalts himself will be humbled, and whoever humbles himself will be exalted.”-Matthew 23:33
“I’ll make this quick,” your boss Tamera says, sitting in her sleek black chair behind her glass desk. “It’s come to my attention that two of you have broken protocol. As you all know, it’s against our policy for team managers and associates to be in relationships with each other…” As Tamera continues explaining the company’s policy, you calmly cross your legs and a slight grin slowly forms on your face. “I’m sorry but I have no choice Sara but to suspend you without pay and Stephan you’re fired.
Everyone’s mouths drop and gasp in disbelieve accept yours. “Kim congratulations. You will be taking Stephan’s place as our new communications manager,” Tamera says, handing you a folder of Stephan’s latest assignments. You completely ignore all of the tears, yelling and finger-pointing around you. You are too busy internally celebrating getting yourself one step closer to the director position you’ve been eyeing since you first started. You totally dismiss your involvement in two peoples’ demise. You smile as you walk back to your cubicle thinking about whose toes you have to step on next to achieve your ultimate goal.
Embodying our impure desires is becoming more commonplace. Society says it’s okay to scheme, tell lies and create chaos if it gets us closer to fame, power or money. Being ruthless is becoming more acceptable than being a sincere and respectable lady.
It’s imperative that we realize that God can/will bless us with personal and professional success in HIS own time. He knows what blessings we can handle and when we can handle them. He doesn’t want us to tear anyone down so we can build ourselves up. That will only lead to severed relationships, bad karma and spiritual pollution. If we focus on God’s will for our lives instead of our desires for power, we are guaranteed to be blessed, at peace and fabulous.
“Whoever exalts himself will be humbled, and whoever humbles himself will be exalted.”-Matthew 23:33
NEW POEM: Astonishing Revelation
What is love?
I’m not really sure, but I can tell you what it’s not.
Love is not looking directly into my visual portals and spewing lies to me.
Love is not cutting my spirit with venomous words when you’re in a bad mood.
Love is not disfiguring my essence because you’re insecure with our relationship.
Love is not abandoning me at night so you can share your body and soul with another woman.
Love is not allowing me to give my everything to you so you can give me nothing but a thirty second phone call sporadically saying you’re too busy.
Love is not standing me up every time we make plans to create pure authentic memories.
Love is not giving me room to assume that our relationship is polluted with poisonous emotions and perpetual chaos.
Love is not ever proving to me that you are willing to destroy mountains of temptation, oceans of anger and valleys of selfishness just to keep me.
So no, I may not know what love is, but I definitely know what it’s not—it’s not you.
We all long to have and experience “prince charming” love. Most of us feel that our lives will never be complete unless we “achieve” a steady relationship that will lead to marriage. It’s extremely important that we recognize the difference between pure God-ordained love and delusional desperation. God doesn’t want us experiencing perpetual pain for the sake of not being alone. He wants us to love ourselves enough to wait for a gentleman that will adore us.
“Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.”—1 Corinthians 13:6-7
I’m not really sure, but I can tell you what it’s not.
Love is not looking directly into my visual portals and spewing lies to me.
Love is not cutting my spirit with venomous words when you’re in a bad mood.
Love is not disfiguring my essence because you’re insecure with our relationship.
Love is not abandoning me at night so you can share your body and soul with another woman.
Love is not allowing me to give my everything to you so you can give me nothing but a thirty second phone call sporadically saying you’re too busy.
Love is not standing me up every time we make plans to create pure authentic memories.
Love is not giving me room to assume that our relationship is polluted with poisonous emotions and perpetual chaos.
Love is not ever proving to me that you are willing to destroy mountains of temptation, oceans of anger and valleys of selfishness just to keep me.
So no, I may not know what love is, but I definitely know what it’s not—it’s not you.
We all long to have and experience “prince charming” love. Most of us feel that our lives will never be complete unless we “achieve” a steady relationship that will lead to marriage. It’s extremely important that we recognize the difference between pure God-ordained love and delusional desperation. God doesn’t want us experiencing perpetual pain for the sake of not being alone. He wants us to love ourselves enough to wait for a gentleman that will adore us.
“Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.”—1 Corinthians 13:6-7
Are You Wife Material?
You are having the time of your life celebrating your two year anniversary with your boyfriend. The two of you have shared countless walks along the lake, expensive romantic dinners, family gatherings and music and food festivals together. Your relationship has always been filled with pure laughter, smiles and love. As far as you are concerned, he’s the one.
“These past two years have been amazing baby. I want you to know that I love you and I look forward to many more years with you,” your boyfriend Jason says, kissing you on the cheek as the two of you watch the sun set. “Well I hope those years include us getting married in the near future,” you smile. “Maybe…” “Maybe? What do you mean maybe? I thought you just said you loved me and couldn’t wait to spend more years with me,” you snap.
“I do love you and I do want us to be together for a longtime, but I don’t think you’re ready for marriage. You can be extremely jealous and insecure at times and that bothers me. You also don’t manage your money well. You are always paying your bills late and that’s not cool at all. And you can be real selfish at times. You don’t consider other people’s feelings as much as you should.” “Well if I have that much wrong with me, why are you with me?” “Look I didn’t say you were a horrible person. I’m just saying there are things about you that concern me and make me think you’re not ready for marriage. I mean come on Lisa do you really think that you’re ready for marriage?” You sit in silence asking yourself the same question.
Society encourages women to “accomplish” wifehood at a certain age almost by any means necessary. We are constantly told to look a certain way and say certain things in order to attract a husband. We become so consumed with superficial attributes that we forget to nurture what really matters—our spirits and faith.
God wants us to experience healthy and beautiful relationships. He wants us to be a blessing to someone and vice versa. If we want to have a wonderful relationship/marriage, we must nurture ourselves first. We must be what we want to attract in our lives (if you want peace, you must be peaceful; if you want loyalty, you must be loyal, etc.). We must carry ourselves in a way that lets everyone know that we are women of God—we are wife material.
“An excellent wife is the crown of her husband, but she who brings shame is like rottenness in his bones.”-Proverbs 12:4
“These past two years have been amazing baby. I want you to know that I love you and I look forward to many more years with you,” your boyfriend Jason says, kissing you on the cheek as the two of you watch the sun set. “Well I hope those years include us getting married in the near future,” you smile. “Maybe…” “Maybe? What do you mean maybe? I thought you just said you loved me and couldn’t wait to spend more years with me,” you snap.
“I do love you and I do want us to be together for a longtime, but I don’t think you’re ready for marriage. You can be extremely jealous and insecure at times and that bothers me. You also don’t manage your money well. You are always paying your bills late and that’s not cool at all. And you can be real selfish at times. You don’t consider other people’s feelings as much as you should.” “Well if I have that much wrong with me, why are you with me?” “Look I didn’t say you were a horrible person. I’m just saying there are things about you that concern me and make me think you’re not ready for marriage. I mean come on Lisa do you really think that you’re ready for marriage?” You sit in silence asking yourself the same question.
Society encourages women to “accomplish” wifehood at a certain age almost by any means necessary. We are constantly told to look a certain way and say certain things in order to attract a husband. We become so consumed with superficial attributes that we forget to nurture what really matters—our spirits and faith.
God wants us to experience healthy and beautiful relationships. He wants us to be a blessing to someone and vice versa. If we want to have a wonderful relationship/marriage, we must nurture ourselves first. We must be what we want to attract in our lives (if you want peace, you must be peaceful; if you want loyalty, you must be loyal, etc.). We must carry ourselves in a way that lets everyone know that we are women of God—we are wife material.
“An excellent wife is the crown of her husband, but she who brings shame is like rottenness in his bones.”-Proverbs 12:4
NEW POEM: Fly With Me
Fly with me!!!
Let me show you what it’s like to be free.
Come with me on this journey of relaxation where all of your troubles disappear and are replaced with the oohs and ahhs life has been waiting to share with you.
Let me share my view of the world with you that is consumed with the wind of fancy that can take you to any and every pure idea you give birth to daily.
Let me show you what it’s like to be free.
Experience the clouds of serenity that always greet me with a smile and caress my inner being with the gentleness of their own.
Allow me to introduce you to the birds of eternal bliss that are sure to sing songs of love and acceptance that will forever fill your heart’s rhythm with completeness each time you reminisce.
Join me as I dance around the sun that freely shares her captivating warmth that is made up of one cup of happiness, two cups of peace and a splash of humbleness.
Once you have seen all of these things, you will never want to experience life any other way.
Come with me.
Join me.
Fly with me!!!
We all yearn to experience perpetual tranquility and happiness, but unfortunately this world makes sure we experience the opposite as much as possible. The only way we can and will obtain authentic peace is by completely surrendering ourselves to the Holy Spirit. He is the only one that can bless and keep us calm in the middle of the chaos life loves to throw our way. If we learn to “fly” with the Lord, nothing will ever destroy our spirits. He can set us free.
“Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will exalt you.”—James 4:10
Let me show you what it’s like to be free.
Come with me on this journey of relaxation where all of your troubles disappear and are replaced with the oohs and ahhs life has been waiting to share with you.
Let me share my view of the world with you that is consumed with the wind of fancy that can take you to any and every pure idea you give birth to daily.
Let me show you what it’s like to be free.
Experience the clouds of serenity that always greet me with a smile and caress my inner being with the gentleness of their own.
Allow me to introduce you to the birds of eternal bliss that are sure to sing songs of love and acceptance that will forever fill your heart’s rhythm with completeness each time you reminisce.
Join me as I dance around the sun that freely shares her captivating warmth that is made up of one cup of happiness, two cups of peace and a splash of humbleness.
Once you have seen all of these things, you will never want to experience life any other way.
Come with me.
Join me.
Fly with me!!!
We all yearn to experience perpetual tranquility and happiness, but unfortunately this world makes sure we experience the opposite as much as possible. The only way we can and will obtain authentic peace is by completely surrendering ourselves to the Holy Spirit. He is the only one that can bless and keep us calm in the middle of the chaos life loves to throw our way. If we learn to “fly” with the Lord, nothing will ever destroy our spirits. He can set us free.
“Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will exalt you.”—James 4:10
Are You A Dream Killer?
You just flew in four hours ago to visit your sister Kara who still lives in your small hometown. Everything is going great. You’ve already visited your old high school, your favorite playground and now the two of you have just arrived at your favorite café.
“This place hasn’t changed a bit since I left for college ten years ago,” you say, scanning the menu even though you already know what you want. “Nope, you know things pretty much stay the same here unless someone decides to open up a new business every ten years,” Kara chuckles. “So what’s new in your life? Do you have a new boyfriend or a new job? Come on. Spill the tea,” you smile. “Well there’s no new guy but I do have a new job. Well actually it’s a new business.” You raise one eyebrow in disbelief. “Really? What kind of business could you possibly want to open here?” “I’m going to open my own Bikram yoga studio. I already took a lease out on a storefront and everything,” Kara gushes.
“Come on Kara really? What makes you think you actually have what it takes to run your own business? And yoga? Please. You don’t even look like the yoga type,” you snap. “See this is your problem Angela. You always put everyone’s dreams down. You act like you’re the only one that can accomplish something positive. You’ve been doing this since we were kids and I’m tired of it. You’ve always been successful killing everyone’s dreams but you’re not going to kill mine.”
Today it’s become normal to spew out negative energy on positive aspirations and people. It’s totally okay to belittle others in order to achieve faux high self-esteem and security by any means necessary.
It’s crucial that we never allow others to postpone, taint or kill our talent and calling. God created all of us with a talent and a path we must follow to achieve His will for our lives. We must walk boldly in our purpose and have faith that God knows what’s best for us at all times. We must combat naysayers with class, confidence and success.
“The Lord will fulfill his purpose for me; your steadfast love, O Lord, endures forever. Do not forsake the work of your hands.”—Psalms 138:8
“This place hasn’t changed a bit since I left for college ten years ago,” you say, scanning the menu even though you already know what you want. “Nope, you know things pretty much stay the same here unless someone decides to open up a new business every ten years,” Kara chuckles. “So what’s new in your life? Do you have a new boyfriend or a new job? Come on. Spill the tea,” you smile. “Well there’s no new guy but I do have a new job. Well actually it’s a new business.” You raise one eyebrow in disbelief. “Really? What kind of business could you possibly want to open here?” “I’m going to open my own Bikram yoga studio. I already took a lease out on a storefront and everything,” Kara gushes.
“Come on Kara really? What makes you think you actually have what it takes to run your own business? And yoga? Please. You don’t even look like the yoga type,” you snap. “See this is your problem Angela. You always put everyone’s dreams down. You act like you’re the only one that can accomplish something positive. You’ve been doing this since we were kids and I’m tired of it. You’ve always been successful killing everyone’s dreams but you’re not going to kill mine.”
Today it’s become normal to spew out negative energy on positive aspirations and people. It’s totally okay to belittle others in order to achieve faux high self-esteem and security by any means necessary.
It’s crucial that we never allow others to postpone, taint or kill our talent and calling. God created all of us with a talent and a path we must follow to achieve His will for our lives. We must walk boldly in our purpose and have faith that God knows what’s best for us at all times. We must combat naysayers with class, confidence and success.
“The Lord will fulfill his purpose for me; your steadfast love, O Lord, endures forever. Do not forsake the work of your hands.”—Psalms 138:8
Are You Always Pushing Everyone Around?
You’ve just arrived twenty minutes late to your monthly book club meeting. Everyone is already laughing and talking about the unexpected marital drama that occurred in chapter five of the book. You immediately interrupt the discussion as soon as you sit down.
“I thought we decided not to read this book. What happened to the other book I suggested,” you ask, crossing your legs and arms in disgust. “No ‘we’ didn’t discuss anything. You told us that the book we all wanted to read was stupid and boring and that we needed to read the book you wanted to read,” Kenya answers sternly. “Okay well whatever. Why aren’t we reading my book?” “Because we’re all tired of you bossing us around Kenya. Every book we’ve read except for two has been books you told us to read. This is a book club not a dictatorship,” Sasha said, taking a sip of her mango lemonade. “I don’t boss anyone around. I just have no problem taking charge when others aren’t up for the job. It’s not my fault you all need direction.” “Well if we need direction or help making any decisions, we won’t be getting it from you. Your days walking over us are over,” Cammie snaps.
It’s becoming more and more popular for females to embrace the title of bossy or a “bad b$#ch”. Women and girls are glorified for mentally and physically bullying other females on a daily basis. Respecting oneself and others is rapidly fading away.
It’s essential that we recognize how important it is to respect others if we are to be our best selves. We must recognize that a real lady doesn’t dismiss other people’s feelings or capabilities as inferior. A real lady consults the Holy Spirit and others before making a decision that can/will affect others. A real lady cares.
“Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves,”—Philippians 2:3
“I thought we decided not to read this book. What happened to the other book I suggested,” you ask, crossing your legs and arms in disgust. “No ‘we’ didn’t discuss anything. You told us that the book we all wanted to read was stupid and boring and that we needed to read the book you wanted to read,” Kenya answers sternly. “Okay well whatever. Why aren’t we reading my book?” “Because we’re all tired of you bossing us around Kenya. Every book we’ve read except for two has been books you told us to read. This is a book club not a dictatorship,” Sasha said, taking a sip of her mango lemonade. “I don’t boss anyone around. I just have no problem taking charge when others aren’t up for the job. It’s not my fault you all need direction.” “Well if we need direction or help making any decisions, we won’t be getting it from you. Your days walking over us are over,” Cammie snaps.
It’s becoming more and more popular for females to embrace the title of bossy or a “bad b$#ch”. Women and girls are glorified for mentally and physically bullying other females on a daily basis. Respecting oneself and others is rapidly fading away.
It’s essential that we recognize how important it is to respect others if we are to be our best selves. We must recognize that a real lady doesn’t dismiss other people’s feelings or capabilities as inferior. A real lady consults the Holy Spirit and others before making a decision that can/will affect others. A real lady cares.
“Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves,”—Philippians 2:3
Are Life Trials Killing Your Motivation?
For the third weekend in a row, you’ve held yourself hostage in your bed and you only leave it to go to the bathroom and get food. You neglect your hygiene and appearance with no problem. You keep your phone on vibrate and only check it once a day just to make sure you don’t miss any life or death messages. When you check your phone, you see that your friend Kami has left you several messages to call her. You sigh and reluctantly call her back.
“Sidney what’s going on with you? Where have you been,” she asks. “What do you mean where have I been? I’ve been at home,” you say, stuffing your mouth with Cheeto Puffs and watching a Fresh Prince marathon. “That’s your problem. When you’re not at work, you’re always at home. You need to stop moping around. I realize Damon cheated on you again but you can’t let that stop you from enjoying life.” “It’s not just that. It’s also the fact that my thyroid has gone haywire making me gain weight. It’s the fact that I got turned down for another job I interviewed for. It’s a lot of things. I’m just…I’m just tired of everything.”
Life is constantly throwing curve balls of pain, frustration, fear and confusion at us from many directions. It seems like as soon as we get over one thing, another stressor comes our way. The more we see things going awry, the more we are inclined to lose focus of our calling and joy in life.
It’s vital that we fight depression and frustration with powerful prayer, meditation and confidence in God. We must allow God to renew our spirits daily in order to handle the unexpected. We must know that our response to trials is what defines our quality of life and not the trials directly. We must fight with faith—boldly.
“Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.”—James 1:2-4
“Sidney what’s going on with you? Where have you been,” she asks. “What do you mean where have I been? I’ve been at home,” you say, stuffing your mouth with Cheeto Puffs and watching a Fresh Prince marathon. “That’s your problem. When you’re not at work, you’re always at home. You need to stop moping around. I realize Damon cheated on you again but you can’t let that stop you from enjoying life.” “It’s not just that. It’s also the fact that my thyroid has gone haywire making me gain weight. It’s the fact that I got turned down for another job I interviewed for. It’s a lot of things. I’m just…I’m just tired of everything.”
Life is constantly throwing curve balls of pain, frustration, fear and confusion at us from many directions. It seems like as soon as we get over one thing, another stressor comes our way. The more we see things going awry, the more we are inclined to lose focus of our calling and joy in life.
It’s vital that we fight depression and frustration with powerful prayer, meditation and confidence in God. We must allow God to renew our spirits daily in order to handle the unexpected. We must know that our response to trials is what defines our quality of life and not the trials directly. We must fight with faith—boldly.
“Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.”—James 1:2-4
NEW POEM: Everlasting Bliss
Here I am again in this place I like to call a piece of heaven.
Come!
Join me on this escapade of peacefulness full of silky raindrops that caress your skin, leaving it with remnants of peace and utter fulfillment.
Don’t be scared.
I promise its okay to experience this majestic world that is guaranteed to be free of worry, pain and insecurities.
This world of mine is filled with the colors of bliss.
Experience the pleasures of yellow that will forever fill your heart with rays of warmth and happiness.
Experience the nature of green that is sure to nurture your soul with all of the affection you desire.
Experience the royalty of purple that greets you with courage and hugs you with strength.
Experience my world.
You think you’ve been here but you haven’t.
If you had, you would have never left.
The world you experienced was full of false fulfillments and phony insecurities that were sure to leave you lonely.
Your world lacks color.
It’s only black and white.
Black is for all the grief and enslavement that is hiding behind the doors of lust and weaknesses that are just waiting to be opened.
White is for all the smiles of deceit that come your way and strip your soul’s color away.
So no.
You have not experienced my world.
If you had, you would have never left.
Experience my world.
The world of inner peace…
The world of natural highs…
The world of EVERLASTING BLISS.
No matter what path we choose we are all searching for the same thing—inner peace. Gaining worldly education, fame, money, beauty, houses and cars will never fill spiritual emptiness. Only the Holy Spirit can rid us of pain, worry, anger and hopelessness. He is the only one that can fill us with smiles, happiness and peace in the mist of chaos. He is the only one that can give us EVERLASTING BLISS.
“Peace I leave with you, My peace I give to you; not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid.”—John 14:27
Come!
Join me on this escapade of peacefulness full of silky raindrops that caress your skin, leaving it with remnants of peace and utter fulfillment.
Don’t be scared.
I promise its okay to experience this majestic world that is guaranteed to be free of worry, pain and insecurities.
This world of mine is filled with the colors of bliss.
Experience the pleasures of yellow that will forever fill your heart with rays of warmth and happiness.
Experience the nature of green that is sure to nurture your soul with all of the affection you desire.
Experience the royalty of purple that greets you with courage and hugs you with strength.
Experience my world.
You think you’ve been here but you haven’t.
If you had, you would have never left.
The world you experienced was full of false fulfillments and phony insecurities that were sure to leave you lonely.
Your world lacks color.
It’s only black and white.
Black is for all the grief and enslavement that is hiding behind the doors of lust and weaknesses that are just waiting to be opened.
White is for all the smiles of deceit that come your way and strip your soul’s color away.
So no.
You have not experienced my world.
If you had, you would have never left.
Experience my world.
The world of inner peace…
The world of natural highs…
The world of EVERLASTING BLISS.
No matter what path we choose we are all searching for the same thing—inner peace. Gaining worldly education, fame, money, beauty, houses and cars will never fill spiritual emptiness. Only the Holy Spirit can rid us of pain, worry, anger and hopelessness. He is the only one that can fill us with smiles, happiness and peace in the mist of chaos. He is the only one that can give us EVERLASTING BLISS.
“Peace I leave with you, My peace I give to you; not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid.”—John 14:27
Are You Okay Having A Cheater For A Man?
Your hot yoga class just ended and you’re drenched in sweat and feeling super accomplished and relaxed. You open your locker and grab your pink and purple polka dot exercise bag and your phone starts vibrating. You realize that you have dozens of texts and missed phone calls from your cousin Paula telling you to call her immediately. As you rush to your car, you quickly dial her number fearful of what she might say.
“What took you so long to call me back!? I’ve been trying to call you for almost two hours,” Paula asks dramatically. “I was in my hot yoga class. What’s going on? Is someone sick or hurt?” “Yeah someone’s sick alright. I just saw Keith hugged up and making out with some chick outside of your favorite café.” You remain silent for a few moments before saying, “That was probably Teresa he was with.” “Wait, what are you talking about? You know this girl?” “Yeah Keith has been messing with her for a while now,” you say nonchalantly, stopping at a traffic light. “So you know he’s cheating on you and you’re okay with it? What is wrong with you? Since when did that become okay?” “Look as long as he takes care of me and doesn’t bring her into our home or let me ever see them together I’ll deal with it.” “Tamala I can’t believe you’re going to let this man disrespect you like this. Are you so desperate to have a man that you’ll deal with him cheating on you?”
“All men cheat.” “As long as I’m his number one, it’s okay.” These are ideologies society has been feeding girls and women for centuries. It’s become the norm to expect disrespect, recklessness and pain from a man. It’s become okay to have low standards.
It’s imperative that we ladies know that God does not want or expect us to stay in relationships that harm our mind, body and/or spirits. He did not create man to cheat (Satan created that ideology). He created man to love, honor, provide and protect his significant other. We must know that we deserve a man that respects God, himself and us. We should never settle for anything less than a gentleman.
“He who commits adultery lacks sense; he who does it destroys himself.”—Proverbs 6:32
“What took you so long to call me back!? I’ve been trying to call you for almost two hours,” Paula asks dramatically. “I was in my hot yoga class. What’s going on? Is someone sick or hurt?” “Yeah someone’s sick alright. I just saw Keith hugged up and making out with some chick outside of your favorite café.” You remain silent for a few moments before saying, “That was probably Teresa he was with.” “Wait, what are you talking about? You know this girl?” “Yeah Keith has been messing with her for a while now,” you say nonchalantly, stopping at a traffic light. “So you know he’s cheating on you and you’re okay with it? What is wrong with you? Since when did that become okay?” “Look as long as he takes care of me and doesn’t bring her into our home or let me ever see them together I’ll deal with it.” “Tamala I can’t believe you’re going to let this man disrespect you like this. Are you so desperate to have a man that you’ll deal with him cheating on you?”
“All men cheat.” “As long as I’m his number one, it’s okay.” These are ideologies society has been feeding girls and women for centuries. It’s become the norm to expect disrespect, recklessness and pain from a man. It’s become okay to have low standards.
It’s imperative that we ladies know that God does not want or expect us to stay in relationships that harm our mind, body and/or spirits. He did not create man to cheat (Satan created that ideology). He created man to love, honor, provide and protect his significant other. We must know that we deserve a man that respects God, himself and us. We should never settle for anything less than a gentleman.
“He who commits adultery lacks sense; he who does it destroys himself.”—Proverbs 6:32
Are You Struggling With Your Sexuality?
You’re having a blast spending time with your mother at you all’s monthly spa day. As you become enthralled by the tranquil power of your hot stone massage, your mother breaks the silence and starts asking you about your love life—or lack thereof.
“So what ever happened to that guy Damon? He seemed like a nice guy,” she says, nonchalantly. “He was nice. He just wasn’t the right guy for me,” you respond, hoping that she changes the subject or stops talking altogether. “Well are you dating anyone right now? If not, my friend’s son Kelly has just moved back in town and he’s handsome, a Christian and a successful accountant…” As she continues to describe Kelly, your mind goes off and you start asking yourself the same questions you’ve been asking yourself for several years. “Why do I always feel like something is missing or off in every relationship I’ve been in? Why does my attraction to women seem to be getting stronger despite my desire to want to live right by God’s standards? Do I feel this way because I was molested by my female babysitter for five years or was I molested because I feel this way…”
“Sexual titles are a thing of the past—sexual fluidity is in.” “It’s okay to experiment” “Biblical teachings on sexual conduct are so passé.” These are common phrases and ideologies that society has adopted in order to avoid the real issues—spiritual issues.
It’s vital that we recognize, understand and respect God’s power, word and flawlessness (God is not a man, that he should lie; neither the son of man, that he should repent: hath he said, and shall he not do it? or hath he spoken, and shall he not make it good?—Numbers 23:19). God loves us so much that he gave us guidelines to live the best lives possible (no matter our circumstances). He does not want us to struggle with any issue (including our sexuality). Whether we were born with certain desires or feel we have acquired them over the years due to certain circumstances (molestation, assault), we must know that God is the only one that can heal and guide us to live a life pleasing to Him.
We must not succumb to what the world says is okay or our own desires (For the time is coming when people will not endure sound teaching, but having itching ears they will accumulate for themselves teachers to suit their own passions,--2 Timothy 4:3). God’s word is clear. He wants us to see and celebrate sexuality between a married man and woman (But from the beginning of creation, ‘God made them male and female.’ ‘Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.’ So they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate.”—Mark 10:6-9). If we focus on the Lord, He will give us the spiritual strength we need and put the right people in our lives to support us on this journey we call life.
“So what ever happened to that guy Damon? He seemed like a nice guy,” she says, nonchalantly. “He was nice. He just wasn’t the right guy for me,” you respond, hoping that she changes the subject or stops talking altogether. “Well are you dating anyone right now? If not, my friend’s son Kelly has just moved back in town and he’s handsome, a Christian and a successful accountant…” As she continues to describe Kelly, your mind goes off and you start asking yourself the same questions you’ve been asking yourself for several years. “Why do I always feel like something is missing or off in every relationship I’ve been in? Why does my attraction to women seem to be getting stronger despite my desire to want to live right by God’s standards? Do I feel this way because I was molested by my female babysitter for five years or was I molested because I feel this way…”
“Sexual titles are a thing of the past—sexual fluidity is in.” “It’s okay to experiment” “Biblical teachings on sexual conduct are so passé.” These are common phrases and ideologies that society has adopted in order to avoid the real issues—spiritual issues.
It’s vital that we recognize, understand and respect God’s power, word and flawlessness (God is not a man, that he should lie; neither the son of man, that he should repent: hath he said, and shall he not do it? or hath he spoken, and shall he not make it good?—Numbers 23:19). God loves us so much that he gave us guidelines to live the best lives possible (no matter our circumstances). He does not want us to struggle with any issue (including our sexuality). Whether we were born with certain desires or feel we have acquired them over the years due to certain circumstances (molestation, assault), we must know that God is the only one that can heal and guide us to live a life pleasing to Him.
We must not succumb to what the world says is okay or our own desires (For the time is coming when people will not endure sound teaching, but having itching ears they will accumulate for themselves teachers to suit their own passions,--2 Timothy 4:3). God’s word is clear. He wants us to see and celebrate sexuality between a married man and woman (But from the beginning of creation, ‘God made them male and female.’ ‘Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.’ So they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate.”—Mark 10:6-9). If we focus on the Lord, He will give us the spiritual strength we need and put the right people in our lives to support us on this journey we call life.
NEW POEM: Endless Sisterhood
This poem is dedicated to my friend, my play sister Aliska who went to be with the Lord on January 18th at 3:33p.m. She was a gem that shined brightly in the world and she took a piece of my heart with her when she passed away.
Our friendship began 26 years ago.
Our friendship began with ponytails dressed in barrettes, toothless smiles and baby dolls.
Our friendship continued to grow as we learned about the magnificent power of Jesus Christ in Sunday School, Vacation Bible School, Bible Bowls and every other church activity our mothers made us attend.
She became my sister, my water sister when we both experienced spiritual cleansing through baptism and received our first communion together.
Celebrating each other’s birthdays and spending the night at each other’s houses was as natural to us as the sun rising and setting.
As teenagers we experienced slight height and flight terror as we rode a plane for the first time together going to the National Baptist Sunday School Convention.
Each day during the convention we talked and joked around all night and dosed off in class during the day.
Our bond didn’t fade but became stronger as we transitioned from girls to ladies.
I still remember her daily phone calls from FAMU about the cute boy on campus and me gushing about my latest XU crush.
We constantly shared “don’t tell anyone” and “I won’t say anything” secrets with each other.
We watched each other become strong spiritually centered women and we always made time for each other.
We hit up the hippest restaurants, cafes and festivals determined to eat as much as our stomachs could handle.
We were bold enough to rock purple hair extensions, fishnets and boas in our burlesque class and energetic enough to not collapse in our African Dance Class.
We had a blast rocking our unique fashion ensembles as we hobnobbed and joked around with the crème de la crème of Hollywood at celebrity brunches and gatherings during Essence Fest.
No matter what life threw at us our bond remained strong.
If we weren’t around each other, we’d talk on the phone for 4 to 5 hours straight about the beautiful complexity of religion, senseless violence and intriguing books. And last but certainly not least we’d talk about the jaw-dropping moments of some of our favorite TV shows How To Get Away With Murder, Empire and her all-time guilty pleasure Love & Hip Hop.
Our friendship was always overflowing with authentic support, loving honesty and plenty of laughter.
She accepted me for me and I accepted her for her
Aliska was and will always be my friend, my sister in spirit and my confidant in all things cool, fun and sincere.
What we share is an ENDLESS SISTERHOOD.
Our friendship began 26 years ago.
Our friendship began with ponytails dressed in barrettes, toothless smiles and baby dolls.
Our friendship continued to grow as we learned about the magnificent power of Jesus Christ in Sunday School, Vacation Bible School, Bible Bowls and every other church activity our mothers made us attend.
She became my sister, my water sister when we both experienced spiritual cleansing through baptism and received our first communion together.
Celebrating each other’s birthdays and spending the night at each other’s houses was as natural to us as the sun rising and setting.
As teenagers we experienced slight height and flight terror as we rode a plane for the first time together going to the National Baptist Sunday School Convention.
Each day during the convention we talked and joked around all night and dosed off in class during the day.
Our bond didn’t fade but became stronger as we transitioned from girls to ladies.
I still remember her daily phone calls from FAMU about the cute boy on campus and me gushing about my latest XU crush.
We constantly shared “don’t tell anyone” and “I won’t say anything” secrets with each other.
We watched each other become strong spiritually centered women and we always made time for each other.
We hit up the hippest restaurants, cafes and festivals determined to eat as much as our stomachs could handle.
We were bold enough to rock purple hair extensions, fishnets and boas in our burlesque class and energetic enough to not collapse in our African Dance Class.
We had a blast rocking our unique fashion ensembles as we hobnobbed and joked around with the crème de la crème of Hollywood at celebrity brunches and gatherings during Essence Fest.
No matter what life threw at us our bond remained strong.
If we weren’t around each other, we’d talk on the phone for 4 to 5 hours straight about the beautiful complexity of religion, senseless violence and intriguing books. And last but certainly not least we’d talk about the jaw-dropping moments of some of our favorite TV shows How To Get Away With Murder, Empire and her all-time guilty pleasure Love & Hip Hop.
Our friendship was always overflowing with authentic support, loving honesty and plenty of laughter.
She accepted me for me and I accepted her for her
Aliska was and will always be my friend, my sister in spirit and my confidant in all things cool, fun and sincere.
What we share is an ENDLESS SISTERHOOD.
FAITHFUL TESTIMONY: Interview With High H.E.A.L.E.D. Hearts’ Founder El’Lise Bethel
Last week I had the pleasure of interviewing the tremendously strong, caring, determined and talented founder of the domestic violence safe sanctuary High H.E.A.L.E.D. (Hope Education Advocacy Love & Empowerment for Damaged) Hearts founder El’Lise Bethel. She shared her powerful testimony of how she went from growing up witnessing abuse in her home, and being in an abusive marriage to leaving her abuser, reestablishing her self-esteem and successfully creating a safe space for women and their children in 2013.
El’lise has made it her mission to openly and boldly address domestic abuse against women and children by addressing the physical, mental and spiritual affects of abuse through counseling, education and mentorship.
El’Lise exactly what is High H.E.A.L.E.D. Hearts?
It’s an organization that helps women and children of domestic abuse by helping them seek shelter, education and job opportunities. We also have counselors on staff that are able to help the children, as well as their mothers. It’s so important to make sure the kids are okay because they are totally innocent and need help dealing with what they’ve experienced. We want to make sure that the children understand that they don’t have to embrace domestic violence. They need to know how to form and be in healthy relationships when they get older.
How did you come up with the name High H.E.A.L.E.D. Hearts?
My sister-in-law Amanda Buckner actually came up with the name. I kept trying to come up with a name and I couldn’t think of anything so I decided to have a contest to see who could come up with the best name. Once Amanda told me her idea, I was like, that’s it. That’s what I’m going to call it.
What inspired you to create it?
My mom, I established it on her birthday. She was such a powerful woman but unfortunately she was a victim of domestic violence. She endured it for many years but was finally able to find the strength to leave.
How did your relationship with God help you through this tough (domestic abuse) chapter of your life?
I felt I had a very strong prayer life, but I was praying for the wrong things. I wasn’t praying for a healing. I had to pray for strength to leave the situation. When I left, I had no money. All I had was one diaper for my baby when my friend picked me up. God had to humble me and groom me during my situation so I would be willing and able to help other women in similar situations. You have to see God’s ministry in your pain.
Do you have a favorite scripture?
I can do all things through Christ that strengthens me.—Philippians 4:13
How do you stay motivated to keep helping abuse victims and walking in your purpose?
My motivation comes from my kids. I do it for them. God allowed me and my kids to get out of our situation and be on this earth another day. He allowed me to find love again. I’m so blessed.
What would you like to say to the girls and ladies that are in violent relationships but are afraid to leave?
If you can’t leave for yourself, leave for something that’s bigger than you. You can die like this or show your kids that there is another way to live.
What advice would you give to girls and ladies if they think the guy they are dating could possibly have abusive tendencies?
Some young girls think it’s cute for a guy to make them check-in constantly. They think it’s cute for a guy to constantly call them and always want to be with them. Always pay attention to the red flags. If he always wants to keep you away from your family and friends, that’s a problem. Try to get that person help by talking to their parents or a responsible adult. Follow your gut and get out of the situation.
How can someone get involved and/or support your organization?
They can email us if they are interested in a membership application or would like to start a chapter in their city. We also accept clothing donations (3508 Chauncey Rd, Tallahassee, FL 32305). Or they can send a monetary donation through our paypal account.
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El’Lise’s testimony is a compelling example of how God can bring us through the harsh fires of life stronger and better that we ever thought possible. If we take God’s hand, there’s nothing we can’t overcome.
El'Lise Bethel is a domestic violence advocate, author, and professional speaker determined to end violence against children. Empowered through her own survival of abuse, she has committed her life's work to educating youth, their teachers, and their caregivers, on the attitudes, behaviors, and systems that perpetuate domestic violence, and strategies to prevent and end it. Her campaign with high school sports teams, “Blowout Domestic Violence," is a perfect example of that. Its popularity in her local community is a testament to her ability to lead, inspire positive action, and also connect with an age group where dating violence and domestic violence is at an all-time high.
In 2013, she created the organization, High H.E.A.L.E.D Hearts to help restore other hurting souls through shelter, empowerment, and love. As her organization expands, El'Lise's ultimate goal is to build residential facilities for victims to escape their situations, become independent, and to provide services necessary for them to rebuild their lives safely and free of fear.
Website: www.h3highhealedhearts.webs.com
Twitter: @highhealedhrts
Instagram: @highhealedhearts
Facebook: h3highhealedhearts
Is Your Past Haunting You?
You take a sip of your spicy hot chocolate while listening to your best friend Kara tell one of her corny jokes everyone loves so much. As everyone laughs and enjoys playing charades at Kara’s monthly game night gathering, you realize that Justin is staring at you and begins walking your way. You immediately dart your way through everyone until you make your way to Kara.
“Oh my goodness, hide me. Justin is trying to talk to me again,” you whisper. “You can’t be serious. You want me to hide you? Why would I do that? Justin is one of the finest, most successful Christian guys in the world. Why in the world would you run from him,” Kara asks. “Because he knows Brian and I’m sure he knows all about how I use to be back in the day.” “Well obviously he doesn’t care because he’s been trying to pursue you for a while now. I think you should give him a chance. He’s a real sweetheart.” “That’s just it. Why would a guy like him want to be with someone with a reputation like mine?” Kara pulls you to the side and says, “Look Taylor you’re not like that anymore. You’ve asked God for forgiveness and you’ve been celibate for five years. You need to stop allowing your past to haunt you. God forgave you and now you need to forgive yourself.”
Very often we ladies fall victim to allowing ourselves to be haunted by our past bad choices. We allow them to be the monkey on our backs and affect our present and future happiness and peace. Every day we look in the mirror and see the old us instead of the ladies we are and want to become.
It’s imperative that we know that God freed us from our sins a long time ago. Once we sincerely ask for forgiveness, that sin goes in the sea of forgetfulness. Satan wants us to hold on to that transgression and continuously feel bad about ourselves. We aren’t perfect, and we will always make bad choices from time to time but we need to focus on being better and allow God’s grace and mercy to permeate our spirits so we can be our best selves.
“If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.”-1 John 1:9
“Oh my goodness, hide me. Justin is trying to talk to me again,” you whisper. “You can’t be serious. You want me to hide you? Why would I do that? Justin is one of the finest, most successful Christian guys in the world. Why in the world would you run from him,” Kara asks. “Because he knows Brian and I’m sure he knows all about how I use to be back in the day.” “Well obviously he doesn’t care because he’s been trying to pursue you for a while now. I think you should give him a chance. He’s a real sweetheart.” “That’s just it. Why would a guy like him want to be with someone with a reputation like mine?” Kara pulls you to the side and says, “Look Taylor you’re not like that anymore. You’ve asked God for forgiveness and you’ve been celibate for five years. You need to stop allowing your past to haunt you. God forgave you and now you need to forgive yourself.”
Very often we ladies fall victim to allowing ourselves to be haunted by our past bad choices. We allow them to be the monkey on our backs and affect our present and future happiness and peace. Every day we look in the mirror and see the old us instead of the ladies we are and want to become.
It’s imperative that we know that God freed us from our sins a long time ago. Once we sincerely ask for forgiveness, that sin goes in the sea of forgetfulness. Satan wants us to hold on to that transgression and continuously feel bad about ourselves. We aren’t perfect, and we will always make bad choices from time to time but we need to focus on being better and allow God’s grace and mercy to permeate our spirits so we can be our best selves.
“If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.”-1 John 1:9
NEW POEM: Toxic Bitterness
This woman’s death was slow and torturous, but obviously inevitable.
Her death began long ago when she was young and first smiled at what she thought to be the most angelic creature she had ever seen.
Her death continued as she got older because she continued to meet smiles of deceit, phony hugs, wrathful I luv u’s, hatful reassurances, selfish kisses, arrogant hellos and genuine goodbyes.
The more she lived the more she died.
In each foreward/backward step she took, her spirit that was filled with joyful hellos, caring truths, unconditional loyalties, faithful hopes, pure solitude and innocent love was replaced with wondrous revenge, gentle frowns, compassionate blows to the heart, delicate I hate u’s, beautiful rage and perpetual loss of respect.
Yes the death of this woman was slow and torturous, but obviously inevitable.
Yes this woman embraced death with open arms because she was tired of fighting with the angst of glorious death.
After all, this woman was doomed the moment she was conceived.
One of the hardest challenges we face in life is trying to remain happy, at peace and optimistic. Life throws a plethora of trials at us (big and small). It’s so easy for us to surrender to bitterness but we must remember to trust and meditate on God’s word to bring us through the hard times. He wants us to focus on Him and use our trials as growth opportunities not total destruction. We must choose tranquility.
“Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.”-Ephesians 4:31-32
Her death began long ago when she was young and first smiled at what she thought to be the most angelic creature she had ever seen.
Her death continued as she got older because she continued to meet smiles of deceit, phony hugs, wrathful I luv u’s, hatful reassurances, selfish kisses, arrogant hellos and genuine goodbyes.
The more she lived the more she died.
In each foreward/backward step she took, her spirit that was filled with joyful hellos, caring truths, unconditional loyalties, faithful hopes, pure solitude and innocent love was replaced with wondrous revenge, gentle frowns, compassionate blows to the heart, delicate I hate u’s, beautiful rage and perpetual loss of respect.
Yes the death of this woman was slow and torturous, but obviously inevitable.
Yes this woman embraced death with open arms because she was tired of fighting with the angst of glorious death.
After all, this woman was doomed the moment she was conceived.
One of the hardest challenges we face in life is trying to remain happy, at peace and optimistic. Life throws a plethora of trials at us (big and small). It’s so easy for us to surrender to bitterness but we must remember to trust and meditate on God’s word to bring us through the hard times. He wants us to focus on Him and use our trials as growth opportunities not total destruction. We must choose tranquility.
“Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.”-Ephesians 4:31-32
NEW POEM: Spectacular Essence
He is the epitome of perpetual grace, infinite understanding and incomprehensible joy.
He possesses vast power that conquers insurmountable chaos, evil and temptation.
He overflows with humble boldness, immeasurable discipline and adoring love.
He experiences ruthless hate, venomous deceit and constant rejection with a smile instead of frustration.
He consistently devotes his everything to saving us from our vile weaknesses, reckless actions and putrid spirits.
He continuously spreads His father’s message with intense passion that heals the body with gentle words, the mind with unfathomable pure thoughts and the spirit with immense peace.
He came to this earth to share His tender essence…
His influential essence…
His SPECTACULAR ESSENCE.
It’s important that we remember and respect why we celebrate Christmas. It’s not about the parties, presents or decorations. It’s about our fantastic Lord and Savior that came to this earth to save us from ourselves.
He possesses vast power that conquers insurmountable chaos, evil and temptation.
He overflows with humble boldness, immeasurable discipline and adoring love.
He experiences ruthless hate, venomous deceit and constant rejection with a smile instead of frustration.
He consistently devotes his everything to saving us from our vile weaknesses, reckless actions and putrid spirits.
He continuously spreads His father’s message with intense passion that heals the body with gentle words, the mind with unfathomable pure thoughts and the spirit with immense peace.
He came to this earth to share His tender essence…
His influential essence…
His SPECTACULAR ESSENCE.
It’s important that we remember and respect why we celebrate Christmas. It’s not about the parties, presents or decorations. It’s about our fantastic Lord and Savior that came to this earth to save us from ourselves.
NEW POEM: The Savior’s Light
He looked down on His creation and saw sadness, fear and violence in their eyes.
He looked down on His creation and saw a few faithful servants pleading to be rescued from evil’s reign.
He looked down on His creation and saw none worthy to rid the world from darkness.
He decided to banish the darkness by being the light with love, patience, structure and honesty.
He decided to melt cold spirits with warm words, servitude and sacrifice.
He decided to embody humbleness, strength and obedience.
He decided to be the everlasting light.
He decided to be the faultless light.
He decided to be THE SAVIOR’S LIGHT.
He looked down on His creation and saw a few faithful servants pleading to be rescued from evil’s reign.
He looked down on His creation and saw none worthy to rid the world from darkness.
He decided to banish the darkness by being the light with love, patience, structure and honesty.
He decided to melt cold spirits with warm words, servitude and sacrifice.
He decided to embody humbleness, strength and obedience.
He decided to be the everlasting light.
He decided to be the faultless light.
He decided to be THE SAVIOR’S LIGHT.
Do You Despise Being With Your Family During The Holiday?
The last day of the fall semester has arrived and students throughout your university are rushing to finish their classes so they can go home and be with their families for the Christmas holiday. You on the other hand are doing everything you can to stall going home—the place you dread.
“Lara what’s taking you so long? Finish packing so we can get on the road before it starts raining,” your best friend/next door neighbor Carla says, walking into you all’s dorm room. “I’m coming, I’m coming. Unlike you I don’t have a perfect family to rush home to,” you respond, zipping up your suitcase. “My family isn’t perfect, but we do love and respect each other.” “See that’s the thing. My family doesn’t respect me. My mom is always telling me I look like I’ve gained weight. My father ignores me except when it comes to fussing about money. My brother is constantly telling me how stupid I am for majoring in English instead of pre-law. And don’t get me started on how my cousins treat me…,” you say, walking out of your dorm room. “That might be true but you still need to find a way to stand up for yourself and love your family at the same time…”
Family gatherings can easily go from hugs and laughter to an all out war in sixty seconds. All it takes is one wrong statement to ruin a Christmas dinner and family bond forever. These rifts can not only affect the family members involved in the conflict but the future generations if the problem is never resolved.
It’s imperative that we ask God to help us deal with family problems in the best way possible. We must do our best to go into the holiday season with a spirit of peace and happiness if we are to have positive experiences with our families. If we can’t resolve an issue or repair a relationship, we need to back away from the person/situation with maturity and respect. Harboring anger will only make us ruin our holiday blessings and overshadow the love God has for us.
“If your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault, between you and him alone. If he listens to you, you have gained your brother.”-Matthew 18:15
“Lara what’s taking you so long? Finish packing so we can get on the road before it starts raining,” your best friend/next door neighbor Carla says, walking into you all’s dorm room. “I’m coming, I’m coming. Unlike you I don’t have a perfect family to rush home to,” you respond, zipping up your suitcase. “My family isn’t perfect, but we do love and respect each other.” “See that’s the thing. My family doesn’t respect me. My mom is always telling me I look like I’ve gained weight. My father ignores me except when it comes to fussing about money. My brother is constantly telling me how stupid I am for majoring in English instead of pre-law. And don’t get me started on how my cousins treat me…,” you say, walking out of your dorm room. “That might be true but you still need to find a way to stand up for yourself and love your family at the same time…”
Family gatherings can easily go from hugs and laughter to an all out war in sixty seconds. All it takes is one wrong statement to ruin a Christmas dinner and family bond forever. These rifts can not only affect the family members involved in the conflict but the future generations if the problem is never resolved.
It’s imperative that we ask God to help us deal with family problems in the best way possible. We must do our best to go into the holiday season with a spirit of peace and happiness if we are to have positive experiences with our families. If we can’t resolve an issue or repair a relationship, we need to back away from the person/situation with maturity and respect. Harboring anger will only make us ruin our holiday blessings and overshadow the love God has for us.
“If your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault, between you and him alone. If he listens to you, you have gained your brother.”-Matthew 18:15
Are Your Finances Making You Bitter For The Holidays?
You’ve been Christmas shopping for over five hours and you’ve purchased nothing. The more you shop, the more frustrated you become. “This is ridiculous. I can’t afford to buy anything I want for anybody,” you scream silently to yourself, flinging an animal print scarf onto the wrong shelf. “Trading presents is dumb anyway. It’s so childish and passé.”
As you continue your exploration of torture from shop to shop, your mood goes from grouchy to sadness. “My life sucks. I’m 30 years old and I can’t even afford to buy a $20 dollar gift for my friend. My crappy job hasn’t given me a raise in five years and everything is becoming more expensive by the minute,” you say to yourself, looking at the price tag on an indigo cut it out clutch. Your emotional stability plummets with every minute that passes. You’ve officially allowed yourself to become consumed with negativity.
It’s becoming more prevalent for us to feel the pressure to pretend we have more than we actually possess. Social media, reality TV shows and celebrity glamour saturation inspire us to run up credit cards and spend money we need for necessities on expensive gifts for others and ourselves. The more we try to impress, the more unhappy we become.
It’s vital that we focus on the blessings God has given us no matter our present circumstances. God wants us to acknowledge our trials as an opportunity to become stronger in Him, not crack under the pressure and become bitter. He wants us to always be the light in a room of darkness and spread His love and light throughout the holiday season and beyond.
“Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice.”—Ephesians 4:31
As you continue your exploration of torture from shop to shop, your mood goes from grouchy to sadness. “My life sucks. I’m 30 years old and I can’t even afford to buy a $20 dollar gift for my friend. My crappy job hasn’t given me a raise in five years and everything is becoming more expensive by the minute,” you say to yourself, looking at the price tag on an indigo cut it out clutch. Your emotional stability plummets with every minute that passes. You’ve officially allowed yourself to become consumed with negativity.
It’s becoming more prevalent for us to feel the pressure to pretend we have more than we actually possess. Social media, reality TV shows and celebrity glamour saturation inspire us to run up credit cards and spend money we need for necessities on expensive gifts for others and ourselves. The more we try to impress, the more unhappy we become.
It’s vital that we focus on the blessings God has given us no matter our present circumstances. God wants us to acknowledge our trials as an opportunity to become stronger in Him, not crack under the pressure and become bitter. He wants us to always be the light in a room of darkness and spread His love and light throughout the holiday season and beyond.
“Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice.”—Ephesians 4:31
Do You Know How To Appreciate The Simple Things?
You’re having an incredible time at dinner with your best friend Mya. The two of you share stories of all the food you all ate over the Thanksgiving holiday, and how much money you spent on black Friday. “Girl I totally didn’t need to buy another pair of boots, but when I saw they were 60 percent off, I just had to get them,” you chuckle, sipping your ginger lemon iced tea.
“Seems like you had lots of fun,” Mya says. “Well, Thanksgiving was okay but the rest of the week was totally boring. All my family wanted to do was laugh and talk, play board games and ride around the city looking at Christmas lights.” “That doesn’t sound boring. Actually that sounds like a lot of fun,” Mya says, taking a bite of her crab cake. “When I celebrate the holidays I want to do something exciting—something glamorous.” “Look Stacie there’s nothing wrong with excitement and glamour but that’s not what’s really important in life. It’s the simple moments with family and friends that really matter. You need to appreciate how blessed you are to have a family that loves you and wants to share their life with you…”
Society tells us that our lives aren’t complete if we don’t have the “celebrity” glam life. We go out of our way posting our experiences on social media to give the appearance that every moment of our lives is stellar. The more we focus on creating big moments, the more we overlook the small priceless ones.
It’s very important that we identify what really matters in life. God wants us to recognize all of our blessings—big and small. He wants us to embody their purity and joy. He wants us to appreciate our journeys not just the destinations. God wants us to choose happiness.
“Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus”—1 Thessalonians 5:18
“Seems like you had lots of fun,” Mya says. “Well, Thanksgiving was okay but the rest of the week was totally boring. All my family wanted to do was laugh and talk, play board games and ride around the city looking at Christmas lights.” “That doesn’t sound boring. Actually that sounds like a lot of fun,” Mya says, taking a bite of her crab cake. “When I celebrate the holidays I want to do something exciting—something glamorous.” “Look Stacie there’s nothing wrong with excitement and glamour but that’s not what’s really important in life. It’s the simple moments with family and friends that really matter. You need to appreciate how blessed you are to have a family that loves you and wants to share their life with you…”
Society tells us that our lives aren’t complete if we don’t have the “celebrity” glam life. We go out of our way posting our experiences on social media to give the appearance that every moment of our lives is stellar. The more we focus on creating big moments, the more we overlook the small priceless ones.
It’s very important that we identify what really matters in life. God wants us to recognize all of our blessings—big and small. He wants us to embody their purity and joy. He wants us to appreciate our journeys not just the destinations. God wants us to choose happiness.
“Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus”—1 Thessalonians 5:18
NEW POEM: Authentic
Gratitude
I’m thankful for the warmth of sunbeams that greet me every time I say hello to the morning and the glow of the moon as I say goodnight to the day.
I’m thankful for the breeze that swirls through the leaves causing them to dance and kiss my face with the slightest touch.
I’m thankful for the birds that chirp and sing songs of bliss and innocence outside of my window.
I’m thankful for the kooky quirks that I possess. They give me strength to be a unique lady with a unique purpose.
I’m thankful for the ability to make words glide off paper and dance through one’s psyche and plant seeds of inspiration and joy.
I’m thankful for my midnight portals that are eyes all the way to my thick thighs that challenge my clothes and dare me to try to get rid of them.
I’m thankful for my mother that encourages me to dance to the beat of my own drum and boldly embrace God’s calling for my life.
I’m thankful for my maw maw’s nurturing spirit that inspires me to be the light in a room full of darkness.
I’m thankful…
I’m thankful for God’s love and patience that always remains infinite.
This is my warm gratitude…
This is my sincere gratitude…
This is my AUTHENTIC GRATITUDE.
I’m thankful for the breeze that swirls through the leaves causing them to dance and kiss my face with the slightest touch.
I’m thankful for the birds that chirp and sing songs of bliss and innocence outside of my window.
I’m thankful for the kooky quirks that I possess. They give me strength to be a unique lady with a unique purpose.
I’m thankful for the ability to make words glide off paper and dance through one’s psyche and plant seeds of inspiration and joy.
I’m thankful for my midnight portals that are eyes all the way to my thick thighs that challenge my clothes and dare me to try to get rid of them.
I’m thankful for my mother that encourages me to dance to the beat of my own drum and boldly embrace God’s calling for my life.
I’m thankful for my maw maw’s nurturing spirit that inspires me to be the light in a room full of darkness.
I’m thankful…
I’m thankful for God’s love and patience that always remains infinite.
This is my warm gratitude…
This is my sincere gratitude…
This is my AUTHENTIC GRATITUDE.
Are You A Motor Mouth?
Your sister circle book club meeting is well underway. Everyone is laughing and discussing their favorite part of the Christian romance novel. “I just love when Cameron realizes that he loves Diana and asks her to be his forever and everything,” Kallie says. “Yes that was definitely a highlight. I loved how the book showed that a woman doesn’t have to sell herself short and settle for the wrong guy. If she trusts in the Lord, He will send her the man she deserves—a man of God,” Ciara chimes in.
Angie, the club president, looks at her watch and says, “Well ladies it’s time to end this month’s meeting. Does anyone have any announcements?” Everyone shakes their head no. “Okay well let me just say ladies please keep sister Kallie in your prayers. She just found out that her boyfriend Tony is gay and has been cheating on her with a guy for two years…”
Everyone gasps except for Kallie. Her eyes become visual daggers looking your way. As soon as the meeting ends, she rushes your way and grabs you by the arm. “Eva what is wrong with you? Why would you tell Angie that? I told you not to tell anyone. I wasn’t ready for the whole world to know my business.” “I’m sorry but I thought you would need support from your sister friends,” you reply. “If I thought I needed support, I would have told them myself. I knew I shouldn’t have told you anything. All you do is run your mouth. You never keep a secret. That mouth of yours is going to get you in real trouble one day if you don’t learn how to keep it closed.”
It’s become commonplace for us ladies to spill the tea of someone’s life without his/her consent. We rationalize it by telling ourselves that we’re only going to tell one person or that we made that person swear that he/she wouldn’t tell anyone else. We’ve become more and more loose with our lips and fingers (via social media typing) than ever.
If we are to grow into the best versions of ourselves, we must be mindful of the thoughts, people and situations we entertain. Engaging in the wrong thing can cause us to say the wrong things and cause a world of trouble. What we say can permanently damage ourselves and/or others. By guarding our tongues, we are guarding our spirits, our lives.
“Those who guard their mouths and their tongues keep themselves from calamity.”—Proverbs 21:23
Angie, the club president, looks at her watch and says, “Well ladies it’s time to end this month’s meeting. Does anyone have any announcements?” Everyone shakes their head no. “Okay well let me just say ladies please keep sister Kallie in your prayers. She just found out that her boyfriend Tony is gay and has been cheating on her with a guy for two years…”
Everyone gasps except for Kallie. Her eyes become visual daggers looking your way. As soon as the meeting ends, she rushes your way and grabs you by the arm. “Eva what is wrong with you? Why would you tell Angie that? I told you not to tell anyone. I wasn’t ready for the whole world to know my business.” “I’m sorry but I thought you would need support from your sister friends,” you reply. “If I thought I needed support, I would have told them myself. I knew I shouldn’t have told you anything. All you do is run your mouth. You never keep a secret. That mouth of yours is going to get you in real trouble one day if you don’t learn how to keep it closed.”
It’s become commonplace for us ladies to spill the tea of someone’s life without his/her consent. We rationalize it by telling ourselves that we’re only going to tell one person or that we made that person swear that he/she wouldn’t tell anyone else. We’ve become more and more loose with our lips and fingers (via social media typing) than ever.
If we are to grow into the best versions of ourselves, we must be mindful of the thoughts, people and situations we entertain. Engaging in the wrong thing can cause us to say the wrong things and cause a world of trouble. What we say can permanently damage ourselves and/or others. By guarding our tongues, we are guarding our spirits, our lives.
“Those who guard their mouths and their tongues keep themselves from calamity.”—Proverbs 21:23
NEW POEM: Complex Thoughts
My mind suffocates with coarse fears and promising pain.
Is there any way I can free my aura, my essence, my everything?
My breath deepens the more I fathom what almost realities could happen to me.
Every time I close my eyes, I am greeted with a montage of troubles that are waiting to consume my serene world.
Why do I have dreams of a future that is filled with deceit and plummeting bliss?
My thoughts are sooo thick until they perpetually seem to get caught in the unbelievable atmosphere I call my mysterious vapor.
This confusion I feel is due to my lucid thoughts…
My puzzling thoughts…
My COMPLEX THOUGHTS.
It’s so important that we recognize when Satan is consuming our thoughts. He can and will make us paranoid and unhappy if we entertain him. We must fight those thoughts with our faith in God and know that God is the master of our lives (the good and the bad). No matter what happens to us or around us, we must know that God has our backs and that He allows us to experience certain things to enrich our spirits—not destroy us.
“Be strong and courageous. Do not fear or be in dread of them, for it is the Lord your God who goes with you. He will not leave you or forsake you.”—Deuteronomy 31:6
Is there any way I can free my aura, my essence, my everything?
My breath deepens the more I fathom what almost realities could happen to me.
Every time I close my eyes, I am greeted with a montage of troubles that are waiting to consume my serene world.
Why do I have dreams of a future that is filled with deceit and plummeting bliss?
My thoughts are sooo thick until they perpetually seem to get caught in the unbelievable atmosphere I call my mysterious vapor.
This confusion I feel is due to my lucid thoughts…
My puzzling thoughts…
My COMPLEX THOUGHTS.
It’s so important that we recognize when Satan is consuming our thoughts. He can and will make us paranoid and unhappy if we entertain him. We must fight those thoughts with our faith in God and know that God is the master of our lives (the good and the bad). No matter what happens to us or around us, we must know that God has our backs and that He allows us to experience certain things to enrich our spirits—not destroy us.
“Be strong and courageous. Do not fear or be in dread of them, for it is the Lord your God who goes with you. He will not leave you or forsake you.”—Deuteronomy 31:6
Are You Always Living In Denial?
It takes you about five minutes to realize that your phone and doorbell are ringing at the same time. You reluctantly slide your pillow off of your head. “Go away…,” you mumble. After another minute of constant phone and doorbell ringing, everything stops. A few seconds later your mother barges into your room.
“Charlotte what is wrong with you? I’ve been calling you and ringing your doorbell for at least ten minutes. Get up now,” your mother screams, yanking the cover off of you. “Mom stop…what do you want?” “Are you drunk—again? What is going on with you? This is the last time I’m going to find you oozing of alcohol. Do you hear me,” she snaps, grabbing your chin. “You have a problem and you will address it.”
“I don’t have a problem. I just went out with my girls since James was out of town,” you say, struggling to sit up against your satin gunmetal-colored headboard. “See this is exactly what I’m talking about. You’re in denial about your drinking. You’re in denial about those girls being your friends. And you’re definitely in denial about James. You all are not a couple. I heard him say in my presence that you were not his girlfriend and he only liked you as a friend. Don’t you get it? He’s just using you until he gets the girl he really wants. You need to stop living life totally based on your dreams. You have to accept your reality first.”
Most of us ladies have a bad habit of ignoring the verbal and nonverbal messages people send our way (especially when it comes to guys we like). “He didn’t mean it that way.” “I can change his mind.” “I’m happy in my situation.” These are constant lies we tell ourselves.
God wants us to live a life filled with pure honesty. He doesn’t want us to lie to ourselves because it only delays the reality that we’re in the wrong relationship with ourselves or others. By living boldly in the truth, we will be able to achieve happiness and tranquility.
“Do not be wise in your own eyes; fear the LORD and shun evil.”—Proverbs 3:7
“Charlotte what is wrong with you? I’ve been calling you and ringing your doorbell for at least ten minutes. Get up now,” your mother screams, yanking the cover off of you. “Mom stop…what do you want?” “Are you drunk—again? What is going on with you? This is the last time I’m going to find you oozing of alcohol. Do you hear me,” she snaps, grabbing your chin. “You have a problem and you will address it.”
“I don’t have a problem. I just went out with my girls since James was out of town,” you say, struggling to sit up against your satin gunmetal-colored headboard. “See this is exactly what I’m talking about. You’re in denial about your drinking. You’re in denial about those girls being your friends. And you’re definitely in denial about James. You all are not a couple. I heard him say in my presence that you were not his girlfriend and he only liked you as a friend. Don’t you get it? He’s just using you until he gets the girl he really wants. You need to stop living life totally based on your dreams. You have to accept your reality first.”
Most of us ladies have a bad habit of ignoring the verbal and nonverbal messages people send our way (especially when it comes to guys we like). “He didn’t mean it that way.” “I can change his mind.” “I’m happy in my situation.” These are constant lies we tell ourselves.
God wants us to live a life filled with pure honesty. He doesn’t want us to lie to ourselves because it only delays the reality that we’re in the wrong relationship with ourselves or others. By living boldly in the truth, we will be able to achieve happiness and tranquility.
“Do not be wise in your own eyes; fear the LORD and shun evil.”—Proverbs 3:7
Is Your Infertility Making You Bitter?
“Carmen come on! We’re going to be late,” your sister Tara says, looking at her watch. “I’m coming. I just need to finish wrapping this stupid present and I’ll be ready,” you mumble. Five minutes later you and your sister are on your way to your cousin’s baby shower. Once you get there, you put forth zero effort to hide your disgust.
“Hey Carmen come here everybody is about to play ‘Guess the Baby Food’ and then we are going to play ‘Guess How Many’,” your cousin Lyla says. “No thanks. I’d rather get run over by a car than play any of these stupid games,” you snap, sipping on fruit punch. “What is wrong with you? You’ve had a bad attitude since you got here. If you don’t want to be here, you can leave. You will not ruin my sister’s shower.” “Look I’m sorry. I just don’t see the point of this stupid shower. It’s just flaunting the fact that she can have a baby and I can’t,” you whine. “Carmen this isn’t an attack on you. This is a celebration about our family being blessed with another baby. You need to find a way to deal with your issues before it ruins your life.”
“I’m not a real woman if I can’t reproduce.” “No man wants someone who can’t have a baby.” Society floods our psyches with these ideologies from birth. If we haven’t gotten married or had children by a certain age, we are considered damaged worthless losers.
It’s vital that we recognize that God has unique plans for each of our lives. Some of us are meant to have one child and some of us are meant to have many. And for some of us, we aren’t destined to birth any. It could be because God has called us to adopt or take care of a relative’s child. Or maybe he sees that having a child is not the best thing for our lives. He could be saving us from a lifetime of heartache. It’s important that we trust God’s will and focus on what we do have versus what we don’t. We are complete, beautiful and wonderful no matter what our destinies hold.
“Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”—Philippians 4:6-7
“Hey Carmen come here everybody is about to play ‘Guess the Baby Food’ and then we are going to play ‘Guess How Many’,” your cousin Lyla says. “No thanks. I’d rather get run over by a car than play any of these stupid games,” you snap, sipping on fruit punch. “What is wrong with you? You’ve had a bad attitude since you got here. If you don’t want to be here, you can leave. You will not ruin my sister’s shower.” “Look I’m sorry. I just don’t see the point of this stupid shower. It’s just flaunting the fact that she can have a baby and I can’t,” you whine. “Carmen this isn’t an attack on you. This is a celebration about our family being blessed with another baby. You need to find a way to deal with your issues before it ruins your life.”
“I’m not a real woman if I can’t reproduce.” “No man wants someone who can’t have a baby.” Society floods our psyches with these ideologies from birth. If we haven’t gotten married or had children by a certain age, we are considered damaged worthless losers.
It’s vital that we recognize that God has unique plans for each of our lives. Some of us are meant to have one child and some of us are meant to have many. And for some of us, we aren’t destined to birth any. It could be because God has called us to adopt or take care of a relative’s child. Or maybe he sees that having a child is not the best thing for our lives. He could be saving us from a lifetime of heartache. It’s important that we trust God’s will and focus on what we do have versus what we don’t. We are complete, beautiful and wonderful no matter what our destinies hold.
“Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”—Philippians 4:6-7
Are You A Victim Of Verbal Abuse?
You’ve been shopping nonstop for two days with your mother and three sisters. You all have been to every mall in the city to find the perfect ensembles for your trip to Paris for your new marketing job. Everyone is having the time of their lives at your expense. Your mother and sisters have done nothing but put you down and degrade you (as usual).
“Chloe come out of the dressing room so we can see the dress on you,” your youngest sister Terri says. You reluctantly exit the room to face your family’s critiques. “What do you think,” you ask cautiously. “You definitely look a hot mess,” your sister Karen laughs. “Yeah you look horrible in that dress. It shows your boney legs and flat chest too much,” your sister Heather adds. “Y’all leave your sister alone. She can’t help it if she’s the ugly duckling. Too bad she doesn’t look like me. She just had to look like y’all father,” your mother says, chuckling. As your family continues to laugh at you, a piece of your soul dies and your self-esteem cascades down the toilet.
Society has programmed us ladies to embody negative views of ourselves. We are constantly told we are too fat, too skinny, dumb, weak, too strong, etc. After awhile, we begin to believe these horrific opinions. We accept the verbal jabs as the norm instead of recognizing that it’s not okay, it’s verbal abuse.
God doesn’t want us to endure or tolerate verbal abuse. He wants us to know the difference between constructive criticism and insults. He did not put us on this earth to absorb and believe that we are not worth being loved and respected by others. He wants us to repel disrespect and love ourselves for who we are—fabulous females.
“There is one whose rash words are like sword thrusts, but the tongue of the wise brings healing.”—Proverbs 12:18
“Chloe come out of the dressing room so we can see the dress on you,” your youngest sister Terri says. You reluctantly exit the room to face your family’s critiques. “What do you think,” you ask cautiously. “You definitely look a hot mess,” your sister Karen laughs. “Yeah you look horrible in that dress. It shows your boney legs and flat chest too much,” your sister Heather adds. “Y’all leave your sister alone. She can’t help it if she’s the ugly duckling. Too bad she doesn’t look like me. She just had to look like y’all father,” your mother says, chuckling. As your family continues to laugh at you, a piece of your soul dies and your self-esteem cascades down the toilet.
Society has programmed us ladies to embody negative views of ourselves. We are constantly told we are too fat, too skinny, dumb, weak, too strong, etc. After awhile, we begin to believe these horrific opinions. We accept the verbal jabs as the norm instead of recognizing that it’s not okay, it’s verbal abuse.
God doesn’t want us to endure or tolerate verbal abuse. He wants us to know the difference between constructive criticism and insults. He did not put us on this earth to absorb and believe that we are not worth being loved and respected by others. He wants us to repel disrespect and love ourselves for who we are—fabulous females.
“There is one whose rash words are like sword thrusts, but the tongue of the wise brings healing.”—Proverbs 12:18
Do You Have The Patience To Wait For The “One”?
Its two o’clock and you’re twenty minutes late for a lunch date with your bestie Crystal. As you throw your lip gloss, cell phone and wallet into your purse, you pick up the invitation to your friend’s bachelorette party. “This is ridiculous. I’m so tired of going to everybody’s wedding. When is it going to be my turn to plan a wedding,” you ask to yourself, flinging the invitation back on the table.
Fifteen minutes later you arrive at your favorite café. “Hey girl sorry I’m late,” you say, hugging Crystal. “It’s okay I just got here ten minutes ago. I had to go to the spa to make sure everything was set for Rainbow’s bachelorette party.” “Oh that reminds me I won’t be able to stay long because I have a blind date in an hour,” you say casually, looking at your menu. “What? A blind date? Why are you going on a blind date?” “Because I’m tired of going to weddings and celebrating everyone’s happiness. Where’s my man? Where’s my happiness? It’s my turn now,” you snap. “I think you need to calm down. Every time one of our friends has a wedding, you go crazy trying to find “the one” and you end up with a total loser. Just calm down, enjoy your life and let God send you a husband—the right one.”
“I don’t want to be alone.” “If I don’t get married now, it may never happen.” These are common fears many of us deal with on a daily basis. We rush into relationships with anyone that looks our way so we won’t be alone. We drive ourselves crazy trying to live up to a “standard” that may not be the best thing for us.
It’s imperative that we trust that God knows what’s best for us. We must respect the road He has us on in order to benefit from all of its blessings (even if we don’t like the timeline). Once we embrace God’s vision for our lives, He will bless us with the gentleman we deserve and desire at the perfect time—His time. Be patient and never settle.
“Wait for the Lord; be strong, and let your heart take courage; wait for the Lord!”—Psalms 27:14
Fifteen minutes later you arrive at your favorite café. “Hey girl sorry I’m late,” you say, hugging Crystal. “It’s okay I just got here ten minutes ago. I had to go to the spa to make sure everything was set for Rainbow’s bachelorette party.” “Oh that reminds me I won’t be able to stay long because I have a blind date in an hour,” you say casually, looking at your menu. “What? A blind date? Why are you going on a blind date?” “Because I’m tired of going to weddings and celebrating everyone’s happiness. Where’s my man? Where’s my happiness? It’s my turn now,” you snap. “I think you need to calm down. Every time one of our friends has a wedding, you go crazy trying to find “the one” and you end up with a total loser. Just calm down, enjoy your life and let God send you a husband—the right one.”
“I don’t want to be alone.” “If I don’t get married now, it may never happen.” These are common fears many of us deal with on a daily basis. We rush into relationships with anyone that looks our way so we won’t be alone. We drive ourselves crazy trying to live up to a “standard” that may not be the best thing for us.
It’s imperative that we trust that God knows what’s best for us. We must respect the road He has us on in order to benefit from all of its blessings (even if we don’t like the timeline). Once we embrace God’s vision for our lives, He will bless us with the gentleman we deserve and desire at the perfect time—His time. Be patient and never settle.
“Wait for the Lord; be strong, and let your heart take courage; wait for the Lord!”—Psalms 27:14
Are You Having A Spiritual Breakdown?
It’s been two weeks since you’ve left your condo. You’ve been binge eating junk food and you haven’t taken a bath in three days. You haven’t gone to work, answered your phone or emails. You’ve cut yourself off from the world and decided to campout in your bed. All is well in your den of depression until your mother and sister barge into your room.
“What are you doing here,” you ask, with no life in your tone. “What are we doing here?! What are you doing in here when you should be at the bakery? Why haven’t you returned our calls, texts or emails? We thought you were dead,” your mom screams, pulling your stale bed covers off of you. “Sis what’s wrong? Talk to us. We love you,” your sister Kara says, sitting next to you. You pause for a few seconds and then you explode. “I can’t do it anymore! I’m so tired of waking up and working hard and bad things keep happening to me. I give up. No matter what I do, it’s not good enough. God hates me,” you wail. “Oh Carmen that’s not true,” your mom says, hugging you. “Life is tough and it will always have its ups and downs. God loves you and will guide you through it all. Allow Him to work in your life.”
“I’m worthless.” “No one cares about me.” “I can’t take it anymore.” At some point in our lives, most of us will let these phrases slip out of our mouths and permeate our spirits. We will fall victim to spiritual depression by trying to treat it as mental depression. By not acknowledging that Satan is attacking our spirits, we will fall deeper and deeper into his abyss of trickery.
It is vital that we recognize when Satan is taking over our thoughts and turning them into anger, fear, isolation, paranoia and low self-esteem. Whenever these thoughts appear in our minds we must focus on the Lord’s voice. We must trust His word and power and know that it’s not always what we are going through, but how we go through it that matters most.
“When the righteous cry for help, the LORD hears and delivers them out of all their troubles.”—Psalms 34:17
“What are you doing here,” you ask, with no life in your tone. “What are we doing here?! What are you doing in here when you should be at the bakery? Why haven’t you returned our calls, texts or emails? We thought you were dead,” your mom screams, pulling your stale bed covers off of you. “Sis what’s wrong? Talk to us. We love you,” your sister Kara says, sitting next to you. You pause for a few seconds and then you explode. “I can’t do it anymore! I’m so tired of waking up and working hard and bad things keep happening to me. I give up. No matter what I do, it’s not good enough. God hates me,” you wail. “Oh Carmen that’s not true,” your mom says, hugging you. “Life is tough and it will always have its ups and downs. God loves you and will guide you through it all. Allow Him to work in your life.”
“I’m worthless.” “No one cares about me.” “I can’t take it anymore.” At some point in our lives, most of us will let these phrases slip out of our mouths and permeate our spirits. We will fall victim to spiritual depression by trying to treat it as mental depression. By not acknowledging that Satan is attacking our spirits, we will fall deeper and deeper into his abyss of trickery.
It is vital that we recognize when Satan is taking over our thoughts and turning them into anger, fear, isolation, paranoia and low self-esteem. Whenever these thoughts appear in our minds we must focus on the Lord’s voice. We must trust His word and power and know that it’s not always what we are going through, but how we go through it that matters most.
“When the righteous cry for help, the LORD hears and delivers them out of all their troubles.”—Psalms 34:17
NEW POEM: My Enemy
My enemy is trying to keep me down.
She is trying to shatter all of my dreams.
I try to run away from her, but wherever I go, she is there.
I fear her sooo much and she knows it.
She laughs at me every time I fall for one of her tricks.
Every time I try to fight her she disappears, but comes back when I least expect it.
She is the one that makes me hurt someone’s feeling, when I am really trying to hurt her.
She is the one that makes me not trust anyone.
She is the one that makes me selfish because I don’t want anyone to take away as much as she has from me.
But there is a good ending to this.
I finally saw her for the first time when I looked in the mirror.
It’s important to know that we can be our worst enemy. It’s not always our trials that take us down, it’s how we react to them that matters the most. We must stay strong and know that we have the power to choose happiness, discipline and peace.
“Wise men lay up knowledge: but the mouth of the foolish is near destruction.”—Proverbs 10:14
She is trying to shatter all of my dreams.
I try to run away from her, but wherever I go, she is there.
I fear her sooo much and she knows it.
She laughs at me every time I fall for one of her tricks.
Every time I try to fight her she disappears, but comes back when I least expect it.
She is the one that makes me hurt someone’s feeling, when I am really trying to hurt her.
She is the one that makes me not trust anyone.
She is the one that makes me selfish because I don’t want anyone to take away as much as she has from me.
But there is a good ending to this.
I finally saw her for the first time when I looked in the mirror.
It’s important to know that we can be our worst enemy. It’s not always our trials that take us down, it’s how we react to them that matters the most. We must stay strong and know that we have the power to choose happiness, discipline and peace.
“Wise men lay up knowledge: but the mouth of the foolish is near destruction.”—Proverbs 10:14
Are You A Worry Wart?
You’re on vacation with your girlfriends and everything is perfect. You’re on a beautiful island, your bungalow is gorgeous and the food, culture and activities are flawless. There’s just one problem, you’re going out of your mind. “Paula are you ready to go yet? It’s almost time to meet our scuba instructor,” your friend Tonya asks, grabbing her beach bag off of the bamboo wood table. “I don’t think I’m going to go. Those lessons are pretty expensive and I should save money. I mean, what if I lose my job or something? What if I get eaten by a shark? What if a rogue wave washes us away? And plus my awful gut is out of control and I’ll end up looking like a whale in the water,” you reply, flopping onto the beige sofa.
“Okay you’re totally overreacting. Haven’t we gone over this before? Chill out and stop worrying so much,” Tonya says. “Yeah Paula you need to get it together. You worry about everything. If you keep doing this, you’ll never be able to enjoy life. Plus you’re driving us crazy. No one wants to hear someone worrying and complaining all of the time. Let go and live life,” Rebecca adds.
“What if I get hurt?” “What if I fail?” So many of us ladies are bombarded with the “what if” syndrome on a regular basis. We constantly focus on what could happen or what has already happened instead of the present positive moments. The more we consume ourselves with these thoughts, the more insecure and unhappy we become.
God does not want us to live a life of constant fear. He wants us to free ourselves from anxiety. He wants us to consult with Him and tell Him our concerns and ask for guidance. If we constantly worry, then we are insulting God’s excellence and power. We must be bold in our faith and our relationship with Him.
“Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.”—Matthew 6:34
“Okay you’re totally overreacting. Haven’t we gone over this before? Chill out and stop worrying so much,” Tonya says. “Yeah Paula you need to get it together. You worry about everything. If you keep doing this, you’ll never be able to enjoy life. Plus you’re driving us crazy. No one wants to hear someone worrying and complaining all of the time. Let go and live life,” Rebecca adds.
“What if I get hurt?” “What if I fail?” So many of us ladies are bombarded with the “what if” syndrome on a regular basis. We constantly focus on what could happen or what has already happened instead of the present positive moments. The more we consume ourselves with these thoughts, the more insecure and unhappy we become.
God does not want us to live a life of constant fear. He wants us to free ourselves from anxiety. He wants us to consult with Him and tell Him our concerns and ask for guidance. If we constantly worry, then we are insulting God’s excellence and power. We must be bold in our faith and our relationship with Him.
“Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.”—Matthew 6:34
Are You Too Trusting?
It’s 11:30 at night, and you’re pacing your bedroom floor like a maniac. You lunge for your phone as soon as it starts ringing. “Hey Stacy did you get my message?” “Yeah I got it. Why do you need three hundred dollars by midnight,” your best friend asks. Reluctantly you reply, “Because I loaned Amber three hundred dollars to pay her car note and she hasn’t paid me back yet. If I don’t pay my cell phone bill before midnight, it’s going to get cut off,” you say, flopping onto your lavender and mint green chaise. “Why is your bill three hundred dollars?” “Because I just bought my brother a new iphone and he hasn’t paid me back yet.”
“Destiny what is wrong with you? You can’t keep asking me to bail you out all of the time. Stop letting people use you. You already know that Amber doesn’t pay anyone back—ever. She still owes you money from last year. Why would you give her money again? And your brother has never respected you. Why would you get him a phone when you know all he does is lie to you? Why do you always trust everybody all of the time…” As Stacy continues her rant, you begin to wonder why you always let people run over you.
“But he says he’s changed.” “This time will be different.” These are phrase so many of use to justify letting people run over us. We constantly lie to ourselves to avoid the reality that we need to rid ourselves of toxic people—no matter who they are (parent, sibling, cousin, friend, significant other).
It’s imperative that we allow the Holy Spirit to discern the good and bad people in our lives. If we try the spirit by the spirit, we will know who is in our lives to enhance it or destroy it. In order to our best selves, we must be selective with the company we keep.
“This is what the Lord says, ‘Cursed is the one who trusts in man, who draws strength from mere flesh and whose heart turns away from the Lord. But blessed is the one who trusts in the Lord, whose confidence is in him.”—Jeremiah 17:5, 7
“Destiny what is wrong with you? You can’t keep asking me to bail you out all of the time. Stop letting people use you. You already know that Amber doesn’t pay anyone back—ever. She still owes you money from last year. Why would you give her money again? And your brother has never respected you. Why would you get him a phone when you know all he does is lie to you? Why do you always trust everybody all of the time…” As Stacy continues her rant, you begin to wonder why you always let people run over you.
“But he says he’s changed.” “This time will be different.” These are phrase so many of use to justify letting people run over us. We constantly lie to ourselves to avoid the reality that we need to rid ourselves of toxic people—no matter who they are (parent, sibling, cousin, friend, significant other).
It’s imperative that we allow the Holy Spirit to discern the good and bad people in our lives. If we try the spirit by the spirit, we will know who is in our lives to enhance it or destroy it. In order to our best selves, we must be selective with the company we keep.
“This is what the Lord says, ‘Cursed is the one who trusts in man, who draws strength from mere flesh and whose heart turns away from the Lord. But blessed is the one who trusts in the Lord, whose confidence is in him.”—Jeremiah 17:5, 7
Are You Always Trying To Change Everyone?
It’s Labor Day and you’re moping around at your parents’ house during their barbecue/pool party. You’re sitting in the bronze hexagon-shaped gazebo trying to avoid as many people as possible. “Monroe, why are you sitting here by yourself? Have you eaten yet,” your mom asks, sitting next to you. “No I’m not really hungry. To tell you the truth, I really don’t feel like being here.” Then you turn to your mother, “Ron makes me sick right now. Can you believe he didn’t show up to the art gala last night? I spent two hundred dollars on his ticket and he didn’t even call to tell me he wasn’t coming.”
“Monroe how many times have we been over this? You’ve got to stop trying to change people. Now you’ve been dating Ron for two years and you know he’s never been into the arts. You know he’s never been a suit and tie guy. You know he’s always been a selfish guy. And you know he’s never been a Christian guy. Why are you always trying to change him? If you don’t like who he is, then you shouldn’t be with him,” your mother replies.
“He’ll come around someday.” “If she’s around me enough, she won’t act like that anymore.” These are terms that so many of us women love to say on a regular basis. Nothing makes us happier than seeing someone as a project and trying to enforce our ideologies and interests on them. We become so consumed trying to change others that we forget that’s not our job.
God is the only one that can transform a person. God uses us to spread his message, not enforce it. Our job is to inform and inspire others to be their best. We can’t change anyone (not even ourselves) if he/she doesn’t want to change. It’s important that we stand firm in our beliefs, while allowing others to accept or reject the message of the Lord.
“But when they opposed Paul and became abusive, he shook out his clothes in protest and said to them, ‘Your blood be on your own heads! I am innocent of it. From now on I will go to the Gentiles."—Acts 18:6
“Monroe how many times have we been over this? You’ve got to stop trying to change people. Now you’ve been dating Ron for two years and you know he’s never been into the arts. You know he’s never been a suit and tie guy. You know he’s always been a selfish guy. And you know he’s never been a Christian guy. Why are you always trying to change him? If you don’t like who he is, then you shouldn’t be with him,” your mother replies.
“He’ll come around someday.” “If she’s around me enough, she won’t act like that anymore.” These are terms that so many of us women love to say on a regular basis. Nothing makes us happier than seeing someone as a project and trying to enforce our ideologies and interests on them. We become so consumed trying to change others that we forget that’s not our job.
God is the only one that can transform a person. God uses us to spread his message, not enforce it. Our job is to inform and inspire others to be their best. We can’t change anyone (not even ourselves) if he/she doesn’t want to change. It’s important that we stand firm in our beliefs, while allowing others to accept or reject the message of the Lord.
“But when they opposed Paul and became abusive, he shook out his clothes in protest and said to them, ‘Your blood be on your own heads! I am innocent of it. From now on I will go to the Gentiles."—Acts 18:6
Do You Have A Hard Time Forgiving Yourself?
You and your sister Gina have spent the whole day visiting art museums and galleries throughout the city. Your day is flawless until Gina tells you her “good” news. “Oh I forgot to tell you that Tim’s brother just moved back into town and he has a major crush on you,” she says, exiting a small art gallery. “Okay…and?” “And? That’s all you have to say? Malcolm, one of the finest successful architects on the planet likes you and you have nothing to say.” “What am I supposed to say? It’s not like I’m going to go out with him or anything. I don’t deserve to be with a guy like him.”
“Please don’t start this again. You’ve got to stop being so hard on yourself. So what, you got pregnant for a guy that was married. It’s not like you knew he was married at the time,” Gina replies, walking into a café. “Yeah but I knew I shouldn’t have been sleeping around—with anyone until marriage. I know better and I should have never slept with him and had a baby out of wedlock. Malcolm’s an amazing man—a Christian man. He deserves to be with someone better than me,” you say, sitting down at a corner table. “You’ve got to forgive yourself. Malcolm knows all about your past and still wants to be with you. The only one who has a problem is you.”
“I can forgive, but I won’t forget.” “I messed up and it’s too late for me to change.” These are phrases many of us use on ourselves and others. We allow ourselves to be consumed with guilt, depression and anger over something we did hundreds of years ago instead of letting it go. We have become accustomed to carrying unnecessary emotional baggage.
God wants us to learn from our bad decisions, not wallow in them. If we never forgive ourselves, we are allowing Satan to make us feel that we are not worthy of forgiveness, happiness and peace. God wants us to ask for forgiveness and move on with a free conscience so we can live the best life possible. God wants us to use our life experiences (good and bad) as a testimony and lesson to help others along the way. He wants us to turn our moments of weakness into powerful spiritual growth opportunities.
“If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.”—1 John 1:9
“Please don’t start this again. You’ve got to stop being so hard on yourself. So what, you got pregnant for a guy that was married. It’s not like you knew he was married at the time,” Gina replies, walking into a café. “Yeah but I knew I shouldn’t have been sleeping around—with anyone until marriage. I know better and I should have never slept with him and had a baby out of wedlock. Malcolm’s an amazing man—a Christian man. He deserves to be with someone better than me,” you say, sitting down at a corner table. “You’ve got to forgive yourself. Malcolm knows all about your past and still wants to be with you. The only one who has a problem is you.”
“I can forgive, but I won’t forget.” “I messed up and it’s too late for me to change.” These are phrases many of us use on ourselves and others. We allow ourselves to be consumed with guilt, depression and anger over something we did hundreds of years ago instead of letting it go. We have become accustomed to carrying unnecessary emotional baggage.
God wants us to learn from our bad decisions, not wallow in them. If we never forgive ourselves, we are allowing Satan to make us feel that we are not worthy of forgiveness, happiness and peace. God wants us to ask for forgiveness and move on with a free conscience so we can live the best life possible. God wants us to use our life experiences (good and bad) as a testimony and lesson to help others along the way. He wants us to turn our moments of weakness into powerful spiritual growth opportunities.
“If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.”—1 John 1:9
REMEMBERING HURRICANE KATRINA POEM SERIES
Spicy Nouvelle Orléans
Written April 7, 2009
This is the final poem in my series. This week I am remembering/celebrating the resilience of my city New Orleans on the tenth anniversary of Hurricane Katrina. I decided to share a few of the poems I wrote concerning the devastation of the city, as well as its strength and undying beauty.
I wrote Spicy Nouvelle Orléans on April 7th, a few years after Katrina while sitting in one of my favorite cafés. I was thinking about how beautiful and resilient my city is when I wrote it.
I wrote Spicy Nouvelle Orléans on April 7th, a few years after Katrina while sitting in one of my favorite cafés. I was thinking about how beautiful and resilient my city is when I wrote it.
She walks wit a strut, daring anyone to get in her way.
She is confident, cool and carefree.
She has swagga some admire and most don’t understand.
She possesses a jazzy flair that can sometimes give you the blues as she puts a little bounce in her step that simulates the motherland.
She is confident, cool and carefree.
She has swagga some admire and most don’t understand.
She possesses a jazzy flair that can sometimes give you the blues as she puts a little bounce in her step that simulates the motherland.
She’s always down to have fun, no matter the occasion.
She’s raw with a sense of commitment to tradition.
She’s spicier than a hot tamale on her mild days.
She flaunts and teases everyone she encounters, assuring them that her Creole and Cajun heritage they could never imitate.
She’s raw with a sense of commitment to tradition.
She’s spicier than a hot tamale on her mild days.
She flaunts and teases everyone she encounters, assuring them that her Creole and Cajun heritage they could never imitate.
She has persevered through liquid wrath that many thought would kill her body and soul.
She exposes her scares with dignity and strength so that nothing will destroy who she was, is and will be.
She will never lose her stride, because a woman like her never has an ending.
She will brush off the disrespect, corruption and annihilation of her past.
She will continue being the ultimate queen Bee…NOLA... aka New Orleans.
She exposes her scares with dignity and strength so that nothing will destroy who she was, is and will be.
She will never lose her stride, because a woman like her never has an ending.
She will brush off the disrespect, corruption and annihilation of her past.
She will continue being the ultimate queen Bee…NOLA... aka New Orleans.
REMEMBERING HURRICANE KATRINA POEM SERIES
Unfading Beauty
Written October 12, 2005
This is the third poem in my series. This week I am remembering/celebrating the resilience of my city New Orleans on the tenth anniversary of Hurricane Katrina. I decided to share a few of the poems I wrote concerning the devastation of the city, as well as its strength and undying beauty.
I wrote Unfading Beauty on October 12th after a day of riding around the city (the parts we were allowed to drive through). Once I left Houston and came back home, it was difficult to see my city in such disarray. This poem is about me seeing the beauty and strength of New Orleans despite the devastation.
I wrote Unfading Beauty on October 12th after a day of riding around the city (the parts we were allowed to drive through). Once I left Houston and came back home, it was difficult to see my city in such disarray. This poem is about me seeing the beauty and strength of New Orleans despite the devastation.
As I look at her, I see debris of pain, fear and devastation in her eyes.
As I look at her, I see all the scars her soul has endured, but I also see the strength that enables her to continue on this journey we call life.
As I look at her, I see a heart aching, but I also see that she refuses to let it be broken.
As I look at her, I see a body that is worn with bruises of wrath, cuts of corruption and fractures of punishment, but I also see a Band-Aid of hope, a cast of pride and a crutch of optimism.
As I look at her, I see all the scars her soul has endured, but I also see the strength that enables her to continue on this journey we call life.
As I look at her, I see a heart aching, but I also see that she refuses to let it be broken.
As I look at her, I see a body that is worn with bruises of wrath, cuts of corruption and fractures of punishment, but I also see a Band-Aid of hope, a cast of pride and a crutch of optimism.
As I look at her, I see slashes of internal abandonment, but I also see stitches of perpetual determination that sees this glorious tragedy as opportunity.
As I look at her, I see a body that has been beaten so badly, until she is almost unrecognizable, but I also see a spirit that has gone untouched and shines brighter than the sun of serenity and the stars of everlasting bliss.
As I look at her, I see a body that has been beaten so badly, until she is almost unrecognizable, but I also see a spirit that has gone untouched and shines brighter than the sun of serenity and the stars of everlasting bliss.
As I look at her, I see a survivor.
As I look at her, I see a warrior.
As I look at her, I see the UNFADING BEAUTY that is New Orleans.
“Instead, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God's sight.”—1 Peter 3:4
As I look at her, I see a warrior.
As I look at her, I see the UNFADING BEAUTY that is New Orleans.
“Instead, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God's sight.”—1 Peter 3:4
REMEMBERING HURRICANE KATRINA POEM SERIES
Longing 4 U
Written September 8, 2005
This is the second poem in my series. This week I will be remembering/celebrating the resilience of my city New Orleans on the tenth anniversary of Hurricane Katrina. I decided to share a few of the poems I wrote concerning the devastation of the city, as well as its strength and undying beauty.
I wrote Longing 4 U on September 8th at a Starbucks in Houston as I was consumed with being homesick and missing my family (especially my mother) and friends. This poem is about me talking to New Orleans and telling “him” how much I missed “him”.
I wrote Longing 4 U on September 8th at a Starbucks in Houston as I was consumed with being homesick and missing my family (especially my mother) and friends. This poem is about me talking to New Orleans and telling “him” how much I missed “him”.
As I sit and watch people go by…I am longing 4 u.
As I watch a couple hold hands and whisper nothing but pleasant ribbons of I luv u’s and promises they intend to keep, but won’t…I am longing 4 u.
As I pass a newsstand full of magazines on how to catch a guy and wedding cakes…I am longing 4 u.
As I watch a couple hold hands and whisper nothing but pleasant ribbons of I luv u’s and promises they intend to keep, but won’t…I am longing 4 u.
As I pass a newsstand full of magazines on how to catch a guy and wedding cakes…I am longing 4 u.
As I go into a restaurant and ask for a table 4 one…I am longing 4 u.
As I sit in my car and turn on the radio, I hear songs that direct my mind to a part of my past I long 4 so badly…I am longing 4 u.
As I watch television and see a certain show that reminds me of u…I am longing 4 u.
As I eat my dinner, I can remember how much fun I used to have going to different places…I am longing 4 u.
As I sit in my car and turn on the radio, I hear songs that direct my mind to a part of my past I long 4 so badly…I am longing 4 u.
As I watch television and see a certain show that reminds me of u…I am longing 4 u.
As I eat my dinner, I can remember how much fun I used to have going to different places…I am longing 4 u.
Everything I see, taste, touch, smell or hear reminds me of you.
I know that this distance between us is temporary and that we will see each other again, but in the meantime…I AM LONGING 4 U.
"Love must be sincere. Hate what is evil; cling to what is good."-Romans 12:9
I know that this distance between us is temporary and that we will see each other again, but in the meantime…I AM LONGING 4 U.
"Love must be sincere. Hate what is evil; cling to what is good."-Romans 12:9
REMEMBERING HURRICANE KATRINA POEM SERIES
Friend Or Foe
Written August 30, 2005
This week I will be remembering/celebrating the resilience of my city New Orleans on the tenth anniversary of Hurricane Katrina. I decided to share a few of the poems I wrote concerning the devastation of the city, as well as its strength and undying beauty.
I wrote Friend Or Foe the day after Katrina hit New Orleans. I was sitting in my hotel room in Houston watching the news as my city went under water and was on fire when I wrote this. This poem is about New Orleans (if she could speak) talking to God about what has just happened to her.
I wrote Friend Or Foe the day after Katrina hit New Orleans. I was sitting in my hotel room in Houston watching the news as my city went under water and was on fire when I wrote this. This poem is about New Orleans (if she could speak) talking to God about what has just happened to her.
Tell me who you are!!!
Are you my friend or foe because right now I’m not sure?
One minute you love me and the next minute you destroy me.
You are the one that gave me life, but you are also the one that has taken it away.
You are the one that cleanses my soul, but you are also the one that has torn it to pieces.
You are the one that massages my every being, but you are also the one that can break every bone in my body.
You are the one that makes sure my brain is functioning properly, but you are also the one that has starved it, leaving me with nothing but fading memories of how life used to be.
You are the one that nurtures me and makes sure I stay colorful and fresh, but you are also the one that has killed everything that makes me thrive.
You have killed my spirit.
You have killed everything that makes me…me.
Are you my friend or foe because right now I’m not sure?
One minute you love me and the next minute you destroy me.
You are the one that gave me life, but you are also the one that has taken it away.
You are the one that cleanses my soul, but you are also the one that has torn it to pieces.
You are the one that massages my every being, but you are also the one that can break every bone in my body.
You are the one that makes sure my brain is functioning properly, but you are also the one that has starved it, leaving me with nothing but fading memories of how life used to be.
You are the one that nurtures me and makes sure I stay colorful and fresh, but you are also the one that has killed everything that makes me thrive.
You have killed my spirit.
You have killed everything that makes me…me.
I don’t know why I am surprised because you have been known to create the ultimate destruction.
I don’t know why I am surprised because it’s not like I was perfect; I mean there is more wrong with me than there is right.
I don’t know why I am surprised because I know my days were numbered and you would come for me.
But I didn’t realize how hard and fearless you would approach me.
I don’t know why I am surprised because it’s not like I was perfect; I mean there is more wrong with me than there is right.
I don’t know why I am surprised because I know my days were numbered and you would come for me.
But I didn’t realize how hard and fearless you would approach me.
I know you were only doing your job, but the question still remains…are you my FRIEND OR FOE?
“Wail, you who live in the market district; all your merchants will be wiped out all who trade with silver will be destroyed…Their wealth will be plundered, their houses demolished. Though they build houses, they will not live in them; though they plant vineyards, they will not drink the wine.”—Zephaniah 1:11,13
“Wail, you who live in the market district; all your merchants will be wiped out all who trade with silver will be destroyed…Their wealth will be plundered, their houses demolished. Though they build houses, they will not live in them; though they plant vineyards, they will not drink the wine.”—Zephaniah 1:11,13
Are You Okay With Having A Loser For A Man?
You’ve just had the best massage of your life at one of the best spas in the city with your cousin Layla. Your mind is at peace until your phone starts vibrating. “Girl please tell me that’s not Jason calling again,” Layla asks, putting on her shirt in the spa locker room. “Yeah it’s him. He’s just calling to see when I’m going to come home so he can use the car to go hangout with his boys,” you say pressing ignore on your phone. “You’ve got to be kidding me. When are you going to drop that bumb and get with a real man?”
“Here we go again. Why are you always in my business? So what if Jason doesn’t have a job, a car and has three kids for three different women. He loves me and that’s all that matters. You keep talking about me having a bumb for a man, but at least I have a man,” you snap, shoving your flip flops in your animal print tote. “Yeah you have a man—a complete loser. You have a man that could care less about bettering himself for anybody in his life. I’d rather be alone and happy than in a relationship and miserable.”
“A man is better than no man.” “I don’t want to be alone.” “I can change him.” These are phrases that so many of us fall victim to year after year. Society has programmed us to believe that our value as women revolves around being in a relationship with any man whether he loves us or not.
God never wants any of us to be desperate for a man. He wants us to know how valuable we are to Him and ourselves. He doesn’t want us to fall for the devil’s trick, insecurity. He wants us to have high standards for any man that wants to pursue us. He wants us to never settle for less than a gentleman that fights to be his best physically, mentally and spiritually. He wants us to be with a man of God.
“Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your request to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”-Philippians 4:6-7
“Here we go again. Why are you always in my business? So what if Jason doesn’t have a job, a car and has three kids for three different women. He loves me and that’s all that matters. You keep talking about me having a bumb for a man, but at least I have a man,” you snap, shoving your flip flops in your animal print tote. “Yeah you have a man—a complete loser. You have a man that could care less about bettering himself for anybody in his life. I’d rather be alone and happy than in a relationship and miserable.”
“A man is better than no man.” “I don’t want to be alone.” “I can change him.” These are phrases that so many of us fall victim to year after year. Society has programmed us to believe that our value as women revolves around being in a relationship with any man whether he loves us or not.
God never wants any of us to be desperate for a man. He wants us to know how valuable we are to Him and ourselves. He doesn’t want us to fall for the devil’s trick, insecurity. He wants us to have high standards for any man that wants to pursue us. He wants us to never settle for less than a gentleman that fights to be his best physically, mentally and spiritually. He wants us to be with a man of God.
“Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your request to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”-Philippians 4:6-7
Do You Practice What You Preach?
You’re in the middle of your client Farrah’s second life coaching session. As you continue your hike up a steep hill, Farrah begins to get frustrated. “I can’t do this it’s too hard. Can we stop and take a break,” she asks, out of breath and sweating profusely. “Nope we have to keep going. You can do this. Never stop doing something just because it’s difficult.” A few minutes later, you both make it to the top and celebrate.
“Oh my goodness I made it,” Farrah screams. “Yes you did. How do you feel?” “I feel great. You’re right. I should never give up. I may not be where I should be, but I’m on the road to getting there.” “Exactly, and I’m not just talking about losing a few pounds. I’m talking about every aspect of your life. You must push through the mental and spiritual trials as well…” As you’re saying this, guilt starts to consume your throat, almost choking up your words. You’re a life coach and you rarely live the words you say. You preach confidence, but you silently drown in insecurity. You advocate endurance and strength, but you crumble perpetually in your personal trials. You don’t practice what you preach.
“Do as I say and not as I do” has become a mantra for so many of us today. We’re thrilled to give advice to everybody but ourselves. We’ll speak with enormous conviction on a plethora of issues and never execute any of them. We’ve become a society of hypocrites.
It’s important that we recognize our shortcomings and work on them before we try to give someone advice on the same issue. If we want to be seen as ladies that deserve respect, we must assess ourselves daily to make sure we are living up to the standards we set for others. We need to be real and practice what we preach.
“Better is a poor person who walks in his integrity than one who is crooked in speech and is a fool.”—Proverbs 19:1
“Oh my goodness I made it,” Farrah screams. “Yes you did. How do you feel?” “I feel great. You’re right. I should never give up. I may not be where I should be, but I’m on the road to getting there.” “Exactly, and I’m not just talking about losing a few pounds. I’m talking about every aspect of your life. You must push through the mental and spiritual trials as well…” As you’re saying this, guilt starts to consume your throat, almost choking up your words. You’re a life coach and you rarely live the words you say. You preach confidence, but you silently drown in insecurity. You advocate endurance and strength, but you crumble perpetually in your personal trials. You don’t practice what you preach.
“Do as I say and not as I do” has become a mantra for so many of us today. We’re thrilled to give advice to everybody but ourselves. We’ll speak with enormous conviction on a plethora of issues and never execute any of them. We’ve become a society of hypocrites.
It’s important that we recognize our shortcomings and work on them before we try to give someone advice on the same issue. If we want to be seen as ladies that deserve respect, we must assess ourselves daily to make sure we are living up to the standards we set for others. We need to be real and practice what we preach.
“Better is a poor person who walks in his integrity than one who is crooked in speech and is a fool.”—Proverbs 19:1
Are You Okay Being Called Out Of Your Name?
It’s the weekend and you are having the time of your life with your two best friends and cousin shopping. “Oh my goodness these clothes are so heavy. I’m going to have to try them on before I can pick up anything else,” you say, walking to the dressing room. “That’s cool we can all go and try on what we have,” your bestie Carly says, walking behind you. Once everyone puts on their first outfit, you each step out of your dressing room to get each other’s opinion.
“What do you think about this dress,” you ask. “Heffa you look good…,” Carly answers. “What do y’all think about this dress? Is it too tight,” your cousin Rachel asks, examining herself in the three-way mirror. “No it’s not too tight. You look like a real boss bi—” “—Hey don’t you call me that,” Rachel snaps at Kammi, not allowing her to finish her sentence. “Would you chill out? What’s wrong with you? I was giving you a compliment.” “Calling someone out of their name is not a compliment. You may be able to get away with calling Tori that, but you won’t with me.” “Rachel calm down. Kammi didn’t mean anything by it. We always call each other slut, ho and skank but we do in love.” “No you do it because you’re so used to being disrespected you don’t even realize you’re doing it to yourself now. You need to get a clue.”
“I’m a bad b%*#h.” “Ho please.” These are some phrases many girls and women use toward each other on a daily basis. It has become so prevalent in society that many of us will actually answer to these vile words like they are our birth name. So many of us lie to ourselves saying that by using these terms in a casual way, we take the negative connotation away. In reality, it shows that we have become enslaved to these words by living up to their true meanings.
It is vital that we recognize our value as God’s precious creations. By referring to ourselves and others as vile names, we devalue our minds, bodies, spirits and potential. The only way we can abolish the negative meanings of these words is by not using them and changing our state of mind. If we think positive and feel we are of value, then we will realize that God didn’t create us to be, act or call ourselves b@#$hes, hos and sluts. He created us to be LADIES.
“It is not what goes into the mouth that defiles a person, but what comes out of the mouth; this defiles a person.”—Matthew 15:11
“What do you think about this dress,” you ask. “Heffa you look good…,” Carly answers. “What do y’all think about this dress? Is it too tight,” your cousin Rachel asks, examining herself in the three-way mirror. “No it’s not too tight. You look like a real boss bi—” “—Hey don’t you call me that,” Rachel snaps at Kammi, not allowing her to finish her sentence. “Would you chill out? What’s wrong with you? I was giving you a compliment.” “Calling someone out of their name is not a compliment. You may be able to get away with calling Tori that, but you won’t with me.” “Rachel calm down. Kammi didn’t mean anything by it. We always call each other slut, ho and skank but we do in love.” “No you do it because you’re so used to being disrespected you don’t even realize you’re doing it to yourself now. You need to get a clue.”
“I’m a bad b%*#h.” “Ho please.” These are some phrases many girls and women use toward each other on a daily basis. It has become so prevalent in society that many of us will actually answer to these vile words like they are our birth name. So many of us lie to ourselves saying that by using these terms in a casual way, we take the negative connotation away. In reality, it shows that we have become enslaved to these words by living up to their true meanings.
It is vital that we recognize our value as God’s precious creations. By referring to ourselves and others as vile names, we devalue our minds, bodies, spirits and potential. The only way we can abolish the negative meanings of these words is by not using them and changing our state of mind. If we think positive and feel we are of value, then we will realize that God didn’t create us to be, act or call ourselves b@#$hes, hos and sluts. He created us to be LADIES.
“It is not what goes into the mouth that defiles a person, but what comes out of the mouth; this defiles a person.”—Matthew 15:11
POEM: A Real Lady
A real lady walks down the road of righteousness.
A real lady hungers and thirsts for wisdom and instruction because she knows that God despises fools.
A real lady acknowledges her flaws and strives to be a better version of herself everyday.
A real lady realizes that she doesn’t have to experience everything in life just to find out it’s not the best choice.
A real lady thinks before she speaks because she knows out of the mouth the heart speaks.
A real lady doesn’t elevate herself; she lets her life do the talking.
A real lady knows that in order to truly love someone, she must first have a fiery relationship with God.
A real lady never takes matters into her own hands. She waits for God to guide her because she knows that His plan for her life will be flawless.
A real lady accepts her trials in life with humbleness and dignity because she knows that God will be with her every step of the way.
A real lady is never jealous of another lady’s blessings because a real lady knows that jealousy is of Satan.
A real lady will settle for nothing less than being a GENTLEMAN’S wife because being a baby momma is not in her vocabulary.
A real lady knows that she doesn’t have to exploit herself by wearing trashy clothes and sleeping with every guy that looks her way because a real lady knows that God says a virtuous woman’s price is far above rubies.
And a real lady walks this road we call life with God right by her side and never let’s go of His hand.
A real lady is compassionate.
A real lady is respectful.
A real lady is a WOMAN OF GOD.
A real lady hungers and thirsts for wisdom and instruction because she knows that God despises fools.
A real lady acknowledges her flaws and strives to be a better version of herself everyday.
A real lady realizes that she doesn’t have to experience everything in life just to find out it’s not the best choice.
A real lady thinks before she speaks because she knows out of the mouth the heart speaks.
A real lady doesn’t elevate herself; she lets her life do the talking.
A real lady knows that in order to truly love someone, she must first have a fiery relationship with God.
A real lady never takes matters into her own hands. She waits for God to guide her because she knows that His plan for her life will be flawless.
A real lady accepts her trials in life with humbleness and dignity because she knows that God will be with her every step of the way.
A real lady is never jealous of another lady’s blessings because a real lady knows that jealousy is of Satan.
A real lady will settle for nothing less than being a GENTLEMAN’S wife because being a baby momma is not in her vocabulary.
A real lady knows that she doesn’t have to exploit herself by wearing trashy clothes and sleeping with every guy that looks her way because a real lady knows that God says a virtuous woman’s price is far above rubies.
And a real lady walks this road we call life with God right by her side and never let’s go of His hand.
A real lady is compassionate.
A real lady is respectful.
A real lady is a WOMAN OF GOD.
Are You Sowing Positive Seeds Into Your Life?
As soon as your doorbell rings three times, you know your twin brother is at the door. “It’s about time you get here. You’re two hours late,” you snap, opening the door for him. “Sorry sis but I lost track of time playing basketball with my boys,” he smiles. “Well whatever. Are you ready to paint my living room?” “Of course that’s why I’m here,” he replies, picking up a paint can and brush. After thirty minutes of silence, Mari breaks the silence with a question.
“So did you hear that Damon is getting married next week?” “For your information, I did and I don’t care. I broke up with him remember,” you say, rolling butter-colored paint onto the walls. “Yeah I remember and it was a stupid thing to do. He’s a good guy. You just decided that treating him like your slave and cheating on him was okay.” “I didn’t treat him any way he didn’t allow me to. He’s weak and deserves that lame plain-Jane of his.” “Annalise why do you always do that? Everything good that comes into your life, you destroy. Every time you get a good job, you undermine your employer and colleagues. You ruin every friendship you’ve ever had. You create more enemies with every relationship you destroy. You’re sowing bad seeds.
Focusing on revenge, jealousy and low self-esteem are potent poisons that can penetrate our souls and cause us to bring harm to ourselves and others. The more we feed and nurture negative thoughts, the more they can and will turn into our actions.
It’s imperative that we recognize the power of our thoughts. Each one starts as an unplanted seed. Each second we focus on a thought, we give it food and water. We must watch our thoughts if we are to live a life of happiness, holiness and victory. Focusing on God’s word and calling for our lives will nourish our souls and allow all that is good to flourish within us and our actions.
“As for that in the good soil, they are those who, hearing the word, hold it fast in an honest and good heart, and bear fruit with patience."—Luke 8:15
“So did you hear that Damon is getting married next week?” “For your information, I did and I don’t care. I broke up with him remember,” you say, rolling butter-colored paint onto the walls. “Yeah I remember and it was a stupid thing to do. He’s a good guy. You just decided that treating him like your slave and cheating on him was okay.” “I didn’t treat him any way he didn’t allow me to. He’s weak and deserves that lame plain-Jane of his.” “Annalise why do you always do that? Everything good that comes into your life, you destroy. Every time you get a good job, you undermine your employer and colleagues. You ruin every friendship you’ve ever had. You create more enemies with every relationship you destroy. You’re sowing bad seeds.
Focusing on revenge, jealousy and low self-esteem are potent poisons that can penetrate our souls and cause us to bring harm to ourselves and others. The more we feed and nurture negative thoughts, the more they can and will turn into our actions.
It’s imperative that we recognize the power of our thoughts. Each one starts as an unplanted seed. Each second we focus on a thought, we give it food and water. We must watch our thoughts if we are to live a life of happiness, holiness and victory. Focusing on God’s word and calling for our lives will nourish our souls and allow all that is good to flourish within us and our actions.
“As for that in the good soil, they are those who, hearing the word, hold it fast in an honest and good heart, and bear fruit with patience."—Luke 8:15
Are You Living Someone Else’s Dream?
You are deep in tranquil thoughts as you paint and create a colorful woman in your art class. With each stroke, you become more relaxed, more free, more you. As your class comes to a close, an old friend from high school recognizes you. “Oh my goodness Trista is that you,” she says, rushing your way. You immediately snap out of your serene zone “Oh hey Maria. How are you,” you ask happily hugging her. “I’m great. I just love your painting. I see you finally decided to pursue your dreams and become an artist,” she says, examining your painting.
“Well actually I haven’t. I just love being a part of this art club. It really helps me clear my head when I’m not working at my dad’s accounting firm.” “Accounting firm? Why are you working there? I thought you hated anything that had to do with numbers?” “I do but my dad has always been grooming me and my brothers to run his firm one day. That’s why we all majored in accounting in school.” “That’s totally understandable from your father’s perspective, but what about what you want? Are you going to continue living your life for your father or for yourself?
“I don’t want to disappoint them.” “Everyone expects me to do this.” “I’m afraid to go against the grain.” These are principles that many of us fall victim to believing. We cave in to outside pressure whether it’s from our family, friends, community or the media. We lose ourselves instead of being brave and following our dreams.
God wants us to embrace the talents and callings He has put in our spirits. He wants us to focus on His will for our lives and not what others feel we should do. If we are to live fulfilling lives, we must follow our passion. It will lead us to confidence, happiness and freedom—freedom to be our best.
“The purposes of a person’s heart are deep waters, but one who has insight draws them out”—Proverbs 20:5
“Well actually I haven’t. I just love being a part of this art club. It really helps me clear my head when I’m not working at my dad’s accounting firm.” “Accounting firm? Why are you working there? I thought you hated anything that had to do with numbers?” “I do but my dad has always been grooming me and my brothers to run his firm one day. That’s why we all majored in accounting in school.” “That’s totally understandable from your father’s perspective, but what about what you want? Are you going to continue living your life for your father or for yourself?
“I don’t want to disappoint them.” “Everyone expects me to do this.” “I’m afraid to go against the grain.” These are principles that many of us fall victim to believing. We cave in to outside pressure whether it’s from our family, friends, community or the media. We lose ourselves instead of being brave and following our dreams.
God wants us to embrace the talents and callings He has put in our spirits. He wants us to focus on His will for our lives and not what others feel we should do. If we are to live fulfilling lives, we must follow our passion. It will lead us to confidence, happiness and freedom—freedom to be our best.
“The purposes of a person’s heart are deep waters, but one who has insight draws them out”—Proverbs 20:5
Are You Always On The Hunt For A Man?
Your heart starts beating super fast as your plane lands. As soon as you are able to exit, you scurry out of the plane and into the airport. After you get your suitcase, you spot your best friend Shelia. “Hey girl, so glad you could make it. Welcome to New Orleans,” she says, grabbing your leopard print carryon. “We’re going to have so much fun at Essence Fest. I got our tickets for the concert tonight and I signed us up for the day of service. We’ll be volunteering at a school not too far from my house,” she says, walking to her car. “That’s sounds nice and all but I have other plans for us,” you reply. “What are you talking about? What plans?”
“First off, we’re not volunteering anywhere. We’re going to the “Day Party Series” today and tomorrow. I bought tickets to all of the single mixers this weekend and I’ve mapped out all of the popular events and places most of the single men hangout,” you say, putting your luggage into the trunk of Shelia’s blue Ford Fusion. “You can’t be serious.” “Oh I’m very serious. Look I’m sorry but I refuse to be alone. I need a man in my life and I’ve heard and read about tons of women meeting their husbands at Essence Festival and that’s exactly what I plan on doing. I’m gonna get me a man,” you snap, getting into the car. “You know this is why you always end up with the wrong man and being unhappy because you’re always running after every man you see. You just broke up with that loser Aiden six weeks ago. Just chill out and let God send you your mate.”
“If I’m not married by 30, I’m a complete loser.” “I can’t be alone.” “I need a man to make me happy.” These are spiritually dangerous and common ideologies that saturate our minds through the media, entertainment and our family values. Single women are seen as lonely unaccomplished creatures that need to be rescued from sadness.
It’s imperative that we remember that God created us to be treasured and pursued by men. He wants us to focus on being the best version of ourselves so we can attract a gentleman that will be happy to pursue us and give us everything we need mentally, physically and spiritually. He wants us to know that a real lady doesn’t chase a man. She waits for a gentleman to pursue her.
“He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives favor from the LORD.”—Proverbs 18:22
“First off, we’re not volunteering anywhere. We’re going to the “Day Party Series” today and tomorrow. I bought tickets to all of the single mixers this weekend and I’ve mapped out all of the popular events and places most of the single men hangout,” you say, putting your luggage into the trunk of Shelia’s blue Ford Fusion. “You can’t be serious.” “Oh I’m very serious. Look I’m sorry but I refuse to be alone. I need a man in my life and I’ve heard and read about tons of women meeting their husbands at Essence Festival and that’s exactly what I plan on doing. I’m gonna get me a man,” you snap, getting into the car. “You know this is why you always end up with the wrong man and being unhappy because you’re always running after every man you see. You just broke up with that loser Aiden six weeks ago. Just chill out and let God send you your mate.”
“If I’m not married by 30, I’m a complete loser.” “I can’t be alone.” “I need a man to make me happy.” These are spiritually dangerous and common ideologies that saturate our minds through the media, entertainment and our family values. Single women are seen as lonely unaccomplished creatures that need to be rescued from sadness.
It’s imperative that we remember that God created us to be treasured and pursued by men. He wants us to focus on being the best version of ourselves so we can attract a gentleman that will be happy to pursue us and give us everything we need mentally, physically and spiritually. He wants us to know that a real lady doesn’t chase a man. She waits for a gentleman to pursue her.
“He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives favor from the LORD.”—Proverbs 18:22
Faithful And Fabulous Female Is One Years Old!!!
POEM: Eternal Appreciation
You were there when I was a little more than an idea.
You were there to see my fledgling ideas mature into permeating inspiration, wholesome advice and carefree entertainment.
You were there as I encountered trivial miscalculations, visual modesty and a minuscule audience.
You were there when I thought I wasn’t worthy of your impeccable presence.
You remained with me when I thought my unapologetic topics would step on your spiritual toes.
Thank you for connecting with my spiritual purpose and colorful perspective.
Thank you for all the encouraging words, remarkable compliments and splendid expectations.
Thank you for incorporating me into your genuine friendships and adoring families.
Thank you for inviting me to share my authentic words with your exquisite blogs and networks.
Thank you for sharing my wisdom through your Tweets, Facebook posts, Instagram shoutouts and word of mouth.
Thank you for inviting and embracing my message into your priceless writer and blogger communities.
Thank you for allowing me to…BE.
Thank you for being my FAITHFUL AND FABULOUS FEMALE FANS.
“Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.”—1 Thessalonians 5:18
You were there to see my fledgling ideas mature into permeating inspiration, wholesome advice and carefree entertainment.
You were there as I encountered trivial miscalculations, visual modesty and a minuscule audience.
You were there when I thought I wasn’t worthy of your impeccable presence.
You remained with me when I thought my unapologetic topics would step on your spiritual toes.
Thank you for connecting with my spiritual purpose and colorful perspective.
Thank you for all the encouraging words, remarkable compliments and splendid expectations.
Thank you for incorporating me into your genuine friendships and adoring families.
Thank you for inviting me to share my authentic words with your exquisite blogs and networks.
Thank you for sharing my wisdom through your Tweets, Facebook posts, Instagram shoutouts and word of mouth.
Thank you for inviting and embracing my message into your priceless writer and blogger communities.
Thank you for allowing me to…BE.
Thank you for being my FAITHFUL AND FABULOUS FEMALE FANS.
“Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.”—1 Thessalonians 5:18
GUEST POST: Is Negativity Polluting Your Spirit?
By
Gema Diaz
Does negativity pollute your Spirit? I think so, don’t you? Let me explain myself on why I believe negativity can mentally pollute our spirits and eventually turns us into bitter people. I believe that our words have power and what we declare on our lives can affect us. But don’t take my word for it. Take God’s word for it. He states in Proverbs 18:21 “The tongue has the power of life and death, and those who love it will eat its fruit” (NLV).
But, first let us start with an operational definition of negativity in order for us to understand each other better. What do I mean by negativity? The dictionary defines it as, “the expression of criticism of or pessimism about something.” In this case, I am not only referring to negativity or pessimism as an expression but something that also resides in our thoughts.
Remember the old phrase, “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me.” As we got older, we realized that was not true. Words can hurt, and most of the time a lot more than sticks and stones. Words can leave lifelong wounds that only God can heal. This relates not only to words we receive from others but also what we express about ourselves.
Negativity begins with our thoughts. We begin with a simple thought of “I CANT.” “I’ll never be able to do that.” And once that thought enters our minds, we usually allow it to affect our emotions. We begin to feel discouraged by these negative thoughts, and other times we assume that others hate us and our self-worth decreases. Then once our thoughts effect our emotions, our emotions begin to play an important role towards our behavior. All of a sudden you no longer want to run that race because you thought you couldn’t. You become discouraged and you quit before you begin. You see our negativity can eventually begin a negative cycle that affects our behavior. All of this can occur in our minds without us even realizing it.
Do not worry for God offers us hope in Proverbs 18:21, “the tongue has the power of life”. We can reverse the above example I gave you by using something called “The Cognitive Triangle” (CBT). This is a procedure that therapist utilize with people who continue to have negative and anxious thoughts. CBT is based on the premise that how we perceive and think about the world directly impacts how we feel and behave. Thoughts, feelings, and behaviors all impact and are impacted by each other. It is believed that a simple thought can create feelings and therefore affect your behavior. If you are someone who continues to have negative thoughts about yourself or others, then you probably also have negative emotions about yourself, affecting your spirit.
We can override all of these negative thoughts is by focusing on God’s truth. Filling up your mind daily with His word will replace those anxious, impure and negative thoughts. Proverbs 23:7 says, “For as he thinketh in his heart, so is he: Eat and drink, saith he to thee; but his heart is not with thee.” Soon our actions will show us what we carry in our hearts. Self-examination can increase our awareness of our tongue, gossip, thoughts, who our friends are, what our conversations consist of, etc. These are the reasons that it is important for us to renew our mind with God's word because His word will renew our spirit. By spending time with God, we allow Him to renew our minds, transform our hearts, and embrace us in His loving arms.
Don’t be held captive by your thoughts. I pray the Holy Spirit comes to you today and releases you from the bondage of your thoughts. May God override those thoughts with His truth and love. Stand firm on God’s promises.
Gema (Hem-a) Diaz is an inspirational blogger and beloved daughter of God from sunny California. She is a Behavioral Therapist and a Marriage, Family and Child Therapist grad school student.
Gema is working on making her dreams a reality as she looks to encourage anyone who will listen. When she isn’t working or writing, she can be found hanging out at a local beach, taking random pictures or at the nearest local coffee shop with her nose in a book. Rooted in her faith, her old-soul leads her on adventures to spread hope into the world.
Website: belovedgems.org
Facebook: belovedgems
Twitter: iamgemadiaz
Instagram: iamgemadiaz
But, first let us start with an operational definition of negativity in order for us to understand each other better. What do I mean by negativity? The dictionary defines it as, “the expression of criticism of or pessimism about something.” In this case, I am not only referring to negativity or pessimism as an expression but something that also resides in our thoughts.
Remember the old phrase, “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me.” As we got older, we realized that was not true. Words can hurt, and most of the time a lot more than sticks and stones. Words can leave lifelong wounds that only God can heal. This relates not only to words we receive from others but also what we express about ourselves.
Negativity begins with our thoughts. We begin with a simple thought of “I CANT.” “I’ll never be able to do that.” And once that thought enters our minds, we usually allow it to affect our emotions. We begin to feel discouraged by these negative thoughts, and other times we assume that others hate us and our self-worth decreases. Then once our thoughts effect our emotions, our emotions begin to play an important role towards our behavior. All of a sudden you no longer want to run that race because you thought you couldn’t. You become discouraged and you quit before you begin. You see our negativity can eventually begin a negative cycle that affects our behavior. All of this can occur in our minds without us even realizing it.
Do not worry for God offers us hope in Proverbs 18:21, “the tongue has the power of life”. We can reverse the above example I gave you by using something called “The Cognitive Triangle” (CBT). This is a procedure that therapist utilize with people who continue to have negative and anxious thoughts. CBT is based on the premise that how we perceive and think about the world directly impacts how we feel and behave. Thoughts, feelings, and behaviors all impact and are impacted by each other. It is believed that a simple thought can create feelings and therefore affect your behavior. If you are someone who continues to have negative thoughts about yourself or others, then you probably also have negative emotions about yourself, affecting your spirit.
We can override all of these negative thoughts is by focusing on God’s truth. Filling up your mind daily with His word will replace those anxious, impure and negative thoughts. Proverbs 23:7 says, “For as he thinketh in his heart, so is he: Eat and drink, saith he to thee; but his heart is not with thee.” Soon our actions will show us what we carry in our hearts. Self-examination can increase our awareness of our tongue, gossip, thoughts, who our friends are, what our conversations consist of, etc. These are the reasons that it is important for us to renew our mind with God's word because His word will renew our spirit. By spending time with God, we allow Him to renew our minds, transform our hearts, and embrace us in His loving arms.
Don’t be held captive by your thoughts. I pray the Holy Spirit comes to you today and releases you from the bondage of your thoughts. May God override those thoughts with His truth and love. Stand firm on God’s promises.
Gema (Hem-a) Diaz is an inspirational blogger and beloved daughter of God from sunny California. She is a Behavioral Therapist and a Marriage, Family and Child Therapist grad school student.
Gema is working on making her dreams a reality as she looks to encourage anyone who will listen. When she isn’t working or writing, she can be found hanging out at a local beach, taking random pictures or at the nearest local coffee shop with her nose in a book. Rooted in her faith, her old-soul leads her on adventures to spread hope into the world.
Website: belovedgems.org
Facebook: belovedgems
Twitter: iamgemadiaz
Instagram: iamgemadiaz
Are You Okay Being His “Filler Girlfriend”?
You are having the time of your life with your gorgeous boyfriend Damon at one of the best five-star restaurants in the city. By the time you get to the fifth course, you start paying attention to how nervous he’s acting. “Oh my goodness he’s going to propose!!! Wait just calm down Sabrina and wait for him to ask you before you start trippin’,” you say to yourself. As soon as the waiter places your chocolate ganache cheesecake on the table, Damon places his hand on yours. “I need to tell you something,” he says nervously. “OMG he’s about to ask me,” you scream in your mind. “Sabrina I’ve been trying to tell you this for weeks now but I can’t seem to find the right words. I’m just going to come out and say it. Sabrina I started seeing Noni again and we’ve decide to move in together.”
It takes you a few seconds to realize that he didn’t propose. In fact, he just broke your heart for the fourth time in six years. “Are you seriously doing this to me again? You promised me that you didn’t want to be with Noni anymore after y’all broke up the last time. You promised me that you wouldn’t leave me for her anymore.” “I know I did but I’m sorry. I can’t help it. Noni and I always seem to find our way back to each other. I’m sorry but I really love her…” As Damon continues to give reasons why he’s leaving you, you start to realize that you’ll never be anything more than his “filler girlfriend”. A woman a guy fills his empty time and space with when he’s not with the one he really wants.
Today we live in a society that encourages and exploits women’s desperation for a mate. Whether it’s a housewife or dating reality show, they all seem to show the same negative quality in women—insecurity. And this spiritual poison leads to low self-esteem, which leads to low standards. Tons of women have reduced themselves to being filler girlfriends, side pieces and jump offs. It’s becoming rare for women to have moral standards.
God wants us to realize that we are beautiful unique beings that deserve to be valued and respected. He wants us to continue to nurture our strengths so we can be what we want to attract—a loving, respectful and loyal person. He wants us to trust that the right gentleman exists and that we shouldn’t settle for being a boy’s number one or two. We should be his ultimate lady love—his blessing.
“She is more precious than jewels, and nothing you desire can compare with her.”—Proverbs 3:15
It takes you a few seconds to realize that he didn’t propose. In fact, he just broke your heart for the fourth time in six years. “Are you seriously doing this to me again? You promised me that you didn’t want to be with Noni anymore after y’all broke up the last time. You promised me that you wouldn’t leave me for her anymore.” “I know I did but I’m sorry. I can’t help it. Noni and I always seem to find our way back to each other. I’m sorry but I really love her…” As Damon continues to give reasons why he’s leaving you, you start to realize that you’ll never be anything more than his “filler girlfriend”. A woman a guy fills his empty time and space with when he’s not with the one he really wants.
Today we live in a society that encourages and exploits women’s desperation for a mate. Whether it’s a housewife or dating reality show, they all seem to show the same negative quality in women—insecurity. And this spiritual poison leads to low self-esteem, which leads to low standards. Tons of women have reduced themselves to being filler girlfriends, side pieces and jump offs. It’s becoming rare for women to have moral standards.
God wants us to realize that we are beautiful unique beings that deserve to be valued and respected. He wants us to continue to nurture our strengths so we can be what we want to attract—a loving, respectful and loyal person. He wants us to trust that the right gentleman exists and that we shouldn’t settle for being a boy’s number one or two. We should be his ultimate lady love—his blessing.
“She is more precious than jewels, and nothing you desire can compare with her.”—Proverbs 3:15
Are You Always Spewing Out Empty Words?
It’s 3p.m. and you’ve just arrived at your best friend’s pool party. You hug and air kiss several people as you meander through the crowd. With each interaction, you make the sweetest promises and statements that you have no intention on fulfilling.
“Hey Anya I’m so glad you could make it,” your friend Blythe says, jumping out of her indigo hot tub. “Girl now you know I would never miss any party you throw,” you say, sitting at the edge of the pool. “And girl you know you lying. You haven’t been to my last three parties. You need to stop lying so much.” “What are you talking about,” you ask.
“Don’t act like you don’t know you lie all the time. You always say you’re going to call me back and you don’t. You told Gina you were going to take her daughter to the zoo and you never did. You promised Amal you were going to be his date for the dinner party last week and you never showed up. You lie so much I don’t think you even realize you’re doing it anymore.”
“Give me your number. We must keep in touch.” “Of course I’ll be there.” “You can tell me anything.” These are popular lies a lot of us tell each other. We happily tell lie after lie flawlessly without thinking about how it will affect the other person or ourselves. We’ve become comfortable telling sweet lies instead of pungent truths.
God wants us to always be honest with ourselves and others. It’s important to know the problems lies can cause. Lies create false happiness and produce real pain, anger and loss. They kill relationships—physically and spiritually. They cripple our reputations and productivity. If we are to be our best, we must be honest with ourselves, which is the ultimate freedom.
“But whoever keeps his word, in him truly the love of God is perfected. By this we may know that we are in Him.”—1 John 2:5
“Hey Anya I’m so glad you could make it,” your friend Blythe says, jumping out of her indigo hot tub. “Girl now you know I would never miss any party you throw,” you say, sitting at the edge of the pool. “And girl you know you lying. You haven’t been to my last three parties. You need to stop lying so much.” “What are you talking about,” you ask.
“Don’t act like you don’t know you lie all the time. You always say you’re going to call me back and you don’t. You told Gina you were going to take her daughter to the zoo and you never did. You promised Amal you were going to be his date for the dinner party last week and you never showed up. You lie so much I don’t think you even realize you’re doing it anymore.”
“Give me your number. We must keep in touch.” “Of course I’ll be there.” “You can tell me anything.” These are popular lies a lot of us tell each other. We happily tell lie after lie flawlessly without thinking about how it will affect the other person or ourselves. We’ve become comfortable telling sweet lies instead of pungent truths.
God wants us to always be honest with ourselves and others. It’s important to know the problems lies can cause. Lies create false happiness and produce real pain, anger and loss. They kill relationships—physically and spiritually. They cripple our reputations and productivity. If we are to be our best, we must be honest with ourselves, which is the ultimate freedom.
“But whoever keeps his word, in him truly the love of God is perfected. By this we may know that we are in Him.”—1 John 2:5
GUEST POST: How To Spot A Serpent
By
Miranda Childers
In the world of a single woman, dating can be tough. It is hard to know how to navigate the murky waters of love successfully, especially when you are coming from a place that is centered on biblical teachings. In our quest to find our Boaz, we run into a lot of bone heads. Often we are blindsided by different experiences that help whip us into an emotionally healthy state. As we learn from these experiences, we gather tons information about the different types of hazardous men scattered in our mist.
It is imperative that we remain cautious. This caution is a much needed muscle to strengthen as we learn how to weed out the serpents that are lying in wait to take advantage of us. For the sake of this article, we will call these not so gentlemanly men serpents. Remember it was the serpent that came into the place of tranquility and wreaked havoc on God’s creation. The first two types of serpents are easier to spot, but some women still fall victim to them.
1.) The Unapologetic Serpent
This is the guy that tells you he means you no good right from the start and doesn't care what you think about it! His actions prove it daily and all too often we simply choose not to pay attention.
2.) The Unintentional Serpent
This immature man is an accident waiting to happen. He hasn't had enough experience with women and needs to grow up. His intentions are always good, but his actions never allow him to follow through on being the God-centered man he claims to be.
But lately the exposure of a new breed has come into play and ladies you must be warned. This is the King Cobra who reigns supreme over all the shady men of the world and I am here to point him out. So ladies, please, take note.
3.) The Secret Serpent
This is the sneakiest one of the bunch. His game so smooth, you are convinced he is a nice guy. The sad part is he will almost convince you that you aren't a nice girl. This guy has an intense need to be liked by everyone around him. His intention is to appear to be a good listener, an excellent supporter, and a solid friend. But honestly, he is listening for clues on how to use you, feigning for support in an effort to garner emotional ties that he can later use against you, and trust me this guy has no real friendships.
He is a master manipulator. His intentions/actions don’t come from his desire to make people happy, but from his egotistical need to feed his own sense of self. Because he has never fully developed his own personality, he looks to others to fill his cup of confidence. You will never win with this guy because he never plays the game with a full deck. You will know that you are in the midst of his fiendish ways because you will constantly hear him tell you things like "I'm a nice guy," "look at what I've done for you," "another guy wouldn't stick around for this," or worse "I am so sorry I keep hurting you...I want to be the perfect man for you, but I just can't."
The last is mind-boggling because it is manipulation at its best. By playing on your need as a woman to nurture and to forgive, this "nice guy" is making you feel guilty for your feelings of disdain for his mistreatment. Instead of owning his poor behavior, he would rather convince you that his point of view is best. He never validates your feelings and rarely sincerely apologizes. Now that doesn't mean you won't hear the words, "I'm sorry." Oh, no, you will hear them often. But do not be fooled they are not stated because of a genuine desire to stop the bad behavior and find common ground. It is actually a meticulous attempt to buy time to replenish his arsenal.
So ladies, please beware. Do not be fooled by a person's words. Constantly assess their actions. Consistency over an extended period of time is the best predictor of a person's true nature. Pay attention.
“Do not judge by appearances, but judge with right judgment.”—John 7:24
Miranda Childers is the creator and CEO of Book of Eve Cosmetics, a certified MUA and member of the IAPO (International Association of Professional Makeup Artists), Actress, Writer, and Teaching Artist who got an early start in the beauty industry. Working for several well-known cosmetic brands helped Miranda develop her skill set as an artist and allowed her to see the lack of high quality makeup for ethnic women.
This void motivated her to create a line that is geared toward creating inspirational products for women who are not served by traditional makeup. Her past endeavors have allowed her the opportunity to travel to places like Paris, England, and Argentina, and to study under great teachers like the incomparable Maurice Stein. With Book of Eve Cosmetics, Miranda hopes to introduce a line of products that helps women find their next chapter in beauty.
Website: www.bookofevecosmetics.com
Twitter: @bookofeve
Instagram: bookofeve
Facebook: Book Of Eve Cosmetics
It is imperative that we remain cautious. This caution is a much needed muscle to strengthen as we learn how to weed out the serpents that are lying in wait to take advantage of us. For the sake of this article, we will call these not so gentlemanly men serpents. Remember it was the serpent that came into the place of tranquility and wreaked havoc on God’s creation. The first two types of serpents are easier to spot, but some women still fall victim to them.
1.) The Unapologetic Serpent
This is the guy that tells you he means you no good right from the start and doesn't care what you think about it! His actions prove it daily and all too often we simply choose not to pay attention.
2.) The Unintentional Serpent
This immature man is an accident waiting to happen. He hasn't had enough experience with women and needs to grow up. His intentions are always good, but his actions never allow him to follow through on being the God-centered man he claims to be.
But lately the exposure of a new breed has come into play and ladies you must be warned. This is the King Cobra who reigns supreme over all the shady men of the world and I am here to point him out. So ladies, please, take note.
3.) The Secret Serpent
This is the sneakiest one of the bunch. His game so smooth, you are convinced he is a nice guy. The sad part is he will almost convince you that you aren't a nice girl. This guy has an intense need to be liked by everyone around him. His intention is to appear to be a good listener, an excellent supporter, and a solid friend. But honestly, he is listening for clues on how to use you, feigning for support in an effort to garner emotional ties that he can later use against you, and trust me this guy has no real friendships.
He is a master manipulator. His intentions/actions don’t come from his desire to make people happy, but from his egotistical need to feed his own sense of self. Because he has never fully developed his own personality, he looks to others to fill his cup of confidence. You will never win with this guy because he never plays the game with a full deck. You will know that you are in the midst of his fiendish ways because you will constantly hear him tell you things like "I'm a nice guy," "look at what I've done for you," "another guy wouldn't stick around for this," or worse "I am so sorry I keep hurting you...I want to be the perfect man for you, but I just can't."
The last is mind-boggling because it is manipulation at its best. By playing on your need as a woman to nurture and to forgive, this "nice guy" is making you feel guilty for your feelings of disdain for his mistreatment. Instead of owning his poor behavior, he would rather convince you that his point of view is best. He never validates your feelings and rarely sincerely apologizes. Now that doesn't mean you won't hear the words, "I'm sorry." Oh, no, you will hear them often. But do not be fooled they are not stated because of a genuine desire to stop the bad behavior and find common ground. It is actually a meticulous attempt to buy time to replenish his arsenal.
So ladies, please beware. Do not be fooled by a person's words. Constantly assess their actions. Consistency over an extended period of time is the best predictor of a person's true nature. Pay attention.
“Do not judge by appearances, but judge with right judgment.”—John 7:24
Miranda Childers is the creator and CEO of Book of Eve Cosmetics, a certified MUA and member of the IAPO (International Association of Professional Makeup Artists), Actress, Writer, and Teaching Artist who got an early start in the beauty industry. Working for several well-known cosmetic brands helped Miranda develop her skill set as an artist and allowed her to see the lack of high quality makeup for ethnic women.
This void motivated her to create a line that is geared toward creating inspirational products for women who are not served by traditional makeup. Her past endeavors have allowed her the opportunity to travel to places like Paris, England, and Argentina, and to study under great teachers like the incomparable Maurice Stein. With Book of Eve Cosmetics, Miranda hopes to introduce a line of products that helps women find their next chapter in beauty.
Website: www.bookofevecosmetics.com
Twitter: @bookofeve
Instagram: bookofeve
Facebook: Book Of Eve Cosmetics
Are You An Education Snob?
It’s going into the second hour of your cousin’s high school graduation and you’re dying of boredom. With each lengthy speech you hear, you start wishing you made up an excuse to not attend. “Why is this taking so long? I knew I should have just sent Kallie some money instead of actually coming to her graduation,” you tell yourself.
“What college is Kallie going to again,” you ask your cousin Kammie. “Oh she decided to go the community college that’s five minutes away from the house. I’m so proud of her. She’s going to major in nursing.” “Community college? Why in the world would she go to a community college? She’s too smart for that. Why would she want to go to such a loser school,” you snap. “Well if you must know, she felt it would be easier on her financially. Plus they have a good nursing program. At the end of the day, it really doesn’t matter what school you go to. As long as you have a good attitude, work hard at your craft and make great connections, you can succeed.” You roll your eyes. “Well I expect you to say something like that because you went to a loser school yourself. I went to one of the best schools in the world and trust me people respect that. I work at one of the best financial firms because of it.” “I may not have gone to a top 10 school, but I was still able to work at a top accounting firm, and now I have my own firm. What company do you have? How much money do you make? My ‘mediocre’ education has me clearing over $200,000 a year.” You are left speechless.
“Better school, better life.” “Ivy League equals money, power and respect.” “I don’t need to work hard. I graduated top of my class.” These are ideologies many in society have adopted. Many kids are told that if they don’t get into a certain school, their lives will be ruined. Today people focus more on secular education instead of building strong character.
It’s important to know that God wants us to succeed in life educationally and financially. He wants us to work hard and achieve our calling, our desire, but not at the expense of losing our souls. He wants us to know that success comes in many forms, and that He will allow your blessings to come from the “top” as well as the “bottom” establishments if He sees fit. He wants us to concentrate on our spiritual education first. He wants us to be wise.
“For by the grace given to me I say to everyone among you not to think of himself more highly than he ought to think, but to think with sober judgment, each according to the measure of faith that God has assigned.”—Romans 12:3
“What college is Kallie going to again,” you ask your cousin Kammie. “Oh she decided to go the community college that’s five minutes away from the house. I’m so proud of her. She’s going to major in nursing.” “Community college? Why in the world would she go to a community college? She’s too smart for that. Why would she want to go to such a loser school,” you snap. “Well if you must know, she felt it would be easier on her financially. Plus they have a good nursing program. At the end of the day, it really doesn’t matter what school you go to. As long as you have a good attitude, work hard at your craft and make great connections, you can succeed.” You roll your eyes. “Well I expect you to say something like that because you went to a loser school yourself. I went to one of the best schools in the world and trust me people respect that. I work at one of the best financial firms because of it.” “I may not have gone to a top 10 school, but I was still able to work at a top accounting firm, and now I have my own firm. What company do you have? How much money do you make? My ‘mediocre’ education has me clearing over $200,000 a year.” You are left speechless.
“Better school, better life.” “Ivy League equals money, power and respect.” “I don’t need to work hard. I graduated top of my class.” These are ideologies many in society have adopted. Many kids are told that if they don’t get into a certain school, their lives will be ruined. Today people focus more on secular education instead of building strong character.
It’s important to know that God wants us to succeed in life educationally and financially. He wants us to work hard and achieve our calling, our desire, but not at the expense of losing our souls. He wants us to know that success comes in many forms, and that He will allow your blessings to come from the “top” as well as the “bottom” establishments if He sees fit. He wants us to concentrate on our spiritual education first. He wants us to be wise.
“For by the grace given to me I say to everyone among you not to think of himself more highly than he ought to think, but to think with sober judgment, each according to the measure of faith that God has assigned.”—Romans 12:3
Are You Only As Pretty As Your Looks?
Your plane has just landed and you’re briskly walking through the terminal to retrieve your luggage. As you gather your bags, a little boy bumps into you. “Hey! Watch it you little brat,” you snap. As soon as you walk outside, you shove your things into your driver’s hands. “Hello Miss Doucette. How was your trip?” “Look I’m not in a talking mood. Just get me to my cousin’s house in five minutes.”
A few minutes later you arrive at your cousin’s house. “Hey girl,” your cousin Deena says, giving you a huge hug. “How was your photo shoot in Miami?” “It would have been great if the shoot director wasn’t such a jerk. He kept telling me that my bad attitude was killing the positive energy on the set with the other models,” you say, flopping onto the sofa. “He told me it takes more than a pretty face to make it in the industry.” “Well he’s right. You don’t want to be the girl with a pretty face and an ugly attitude. If you keep that up, you will start to look just as ugly on the outside as you do on the inside.”
“She has a stank attitude.” “She’s such a mean girl.” These are phrases that are starting to describe more and more girls and women every day. It’s becoming more commonplace for women to only focus on their outward appearance instead of their spirits.
God wants us nurture our spirits just as much or more than our outward selves. He wants us to focus on creating an undying beauty instead of one that can fade away at any moment. It’s imperative that we realize that we are only as beautiful as our character. If our character is compromised, we will never be able to achieve TRUE BEAUTY.
“Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight.”—1 Peter 3:3-4
A few minutes later you arrive at your cousin’s house. “Hey girl,” your cousin Deena says, giving you a huge hug. “How was your photo shoot in Miami?” “It would have been great if the shoot director wasn’t such a jerk. He kept telling me that my bad attitude was killing the positive energy on the set with the other models,” you say, flopping onto the sofa. “He told me it takes more than a pretty face to make it in the industry.” “Well he’s right. You don’t want to be the girl with a pretty face and an ugly attitude. If you keep that up, you will start to look just as ugly on the outside as you do on the inside.”
“She has a stank attitude.” “She’s such a mean girl.” These are phrases that are starting to describe more and more girls and women every day. It’s becoming more commonplace for women to only focus on their outward appearance instead of their spirits.
God wants us nurture our spirits just as much or more than our outward selves. He wants us to focus on creating an undying beauty instead of one that can fade away at any moment. It’s imperative that we realize that we are only as beautiful as our character. If our character is compromised, we will never be able to achieve TRUE BEAUTY.
“Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight.”—1 Peter 3:3-4
Is Social Media Ruining Your Life?
You’re having the time of your life this weekend with your bestie. You all are shopping at the hottest boutiques, purchasing the chicest ensembles and hanging out at the hippest cafes and restaurants. And of course you’re documenting every minute of it via Twitter, Instagram and Vine.
“So what ever happened with that guy you were dating? You use to talk about him nonstop and now, nothing,” Mia asks, as y’all walk into a gelato parlor. “Girl can you believe he had the nerve to call me up and tell me that he thought the pictures and videos I post are inappropriate? So I told him if he didn’t like it, he didn’t need to follow me. So he got mad and broke things off,” you say, taking a selfie and posting it online.
“Well some of the things you say and post are a little out there. I told you to stop posting all those lingerie selfies and risqué comments. I thought you learned your lesson after you didn’t get the internship at that P.R. firm because they said the way you represented yourself on social media wasn’t the type of person they wanted working for them. And don’t forget about all of the Twitter and Facebook fights you’ve had with people over stupid stuff. Don’t you think you should chill out with social media a little bit? I mean this weekend you couldn’t even enjoy anything because you’re always tweeting or taking pictures so you can “look” like you’re having fun. You’ve become a slave to social media.”
“I’ve got to post this.” “I have over 10,000 followers.” “My picture just got a 100 likes.” These are phrases most of us are guilty of saying. We devote hours of our precious time posting, scrolling and thinking of ways we can achieve “celebrity” status. The more outrageous the post, the more followers we can get.
It’s important that we realize that God doesn’t want us to become consumed with wanting to be popular or having a “glamorous” life. He wants us to live a spiritually fulfilling life free from mental slavery. He wants us to focus on the important things—like our character. He wants us to treasure our reputations and authentic relationships.
“A good name is more desirable than great riches; to be esteemed is better than silver or gold.”—Proverbs 22:1
“So what ever happened with that guy you were dating? You use to talk about him nonstop and now, nothing,” Mia asks, as y’all walk into a gelato parlor. “Girl can you believe he had the nerve to call me up and tell me that he thought the pictures and videos I post are inappropriate? So I told him if he didn’t like it, he didn’t need to follow me. So he got mad and broke things off,” you say, taking a selfie and posting it online.
“Well some of the things you say and post are a little out there. I told you to stop posting all those lingerie selfies and risqué comments. I thought you learned your lesson after you didn’t get the internship at that P.R. firm because they said the way you represented yourself on social media wasn’t the type of person they wanted working for them. And don’t forget about all of the Twitter and Facebook fights you’ve had with people over stupid stuff. Don’t you think you should chill out with social media a little bit? I mean this weekend you couldn’t even enjoy anything because you’re always tweeting or taking pictures so you can “look” like you’re having fun. You’ve become a slave to social media.”
“I’ve got to post this.” “I have over 10,000 followers.” “My picture just got a 100 likes.” These are phrases most of us are guilty of saying. We devote hours of our precious time posting, scrolling and thinking of ways we can achieve “celebrity” status. The more outrageous the post, the more followers we can get.
It’s important that we realize that God doesn’t want us to become consumed with wanting to be popular or having a “glamorous” life. He wants us to live a spiritually fulfilling life free from mental slavery. He wants us to focus on the important things—like our character. He wants us to treasure our reputations and authentic relationships.
“A good name is more desirable than great riches; to be esteemed is better than silver or gold.”—Proverbs 22:1
Is Your Temper Getting The Best Of You?
You throw your purse into the car and slam the door. As you zoom down the street, your mind begins racing with thoughts. “What a complete loser! How could he not give me that promotion? Talkin’ about I have a temper problem. I don’t have a temper problem!!!” You continue your private rant until you pull into your parents’ driveway.
As soon as you walk into the kitchen, you’re greeted with a sincere smile from your mother. “Well hello there. So glad you could make it. I thought you were going to be held up at work,” she says warmly embracing you. “Don’t even mention work,” you snap. “I’m so done with that place.” “What are you talking about? What happened,” she asks, chopping up a green bell pepper. “My boss had the nerve to not give me the marketing director position because he said I needed to work on my temper problem. And I don’t have a temper problem, so I told him off and left.” “You realize that telling him off just validated why he didn’t want to give you the promotion right? Kia you’ve always had a bad temper. It’s time for you to grow up and realize you can’t go off on someone every time something doesn’t go your way. If you keep this up, you’re going to have no friends or family that will want to be bothered with you. Remember you can say and do whatever you want, but nobody has to put up with you.”
Society tells us it’s okay to always speak our minds no matter how it affects someone. Many reality shows encourage us (women) to verbally or physically attack someone if we think he/she has “disrespected” us. It’s become normal to attack people on social media for the minutest reasons. Self-control and respect for others has become a thing of the past.
God wants us to always be aware of our actions. He wants us to be slow to speak and quick to listen so we can grow in wisdom not in foolishness. He wants us to know that it’s normal and okay to disagree with others, but it’s not okay to be malicious. He wants us to walk in Him, not our emotions. He wants us to be ladies.
“Whoever is slow to anger has great understanding, but he who has a hasty temper exalts folly.”—Proverbs 14:29
As soon as you walk into the kitchen, you’re greeted with a sincere smile from your mother. “Well hello there. So glad you could make it. I thought you were going to be held up at work,” she says warmly embracing you. “Don’t even mention work,” you snap. “I’m so done with that place.” “What are you talking about? What happened,” she asks, chopping up a green bell pepper. “My boss had the nerve to not give me the marketing director position because he said I needed to work on my temper problem. And I don’t have a temper problem, so I told him off and left.” “You realize that telling him off just validated why he didn’t want to give you the promotion right? Kia you’ve always had a bad temper. It’s time for you to grow up and realize you can’t go off on someone every time something doesn’t go your way. If you keep this up, you’re going to have no friends or family that will want to be bothered with you. Remember you can say and do whatever you want, but nobody has to put up with you.”
Society tells us it’s okay to always speak our minds no matter how it affects someone. Many reality shows encourage us (women) to verbally or physically attack someone if we think he/she has “disrespected” us. It’s become normal to attack people on social media for the minutest reasons. Self-control and respect for others has become a thing of the past.
God wants us to always be aware of our actions. He wants us to be slow to speak and quick to listen so we can grow in wisdom not in foolishness. He wants us to know that it’s normal and okay to disagree with others, but it’s not okay to be malicious. He wants us to walk in Him, not our emotions. He wants us to be ladies.
“Whoever is slow to anger has great understanding, but he who has a hasty temper exalts folly.”—Proverbs 14:29
Does Your Man Love The Real You?
You’re zooming around your condo like a tornado grabbing clothes from your closets and dresser drawers. “Girl why are you trippin’? You’re rushing around like you’re going out of town in the next five minutes,” your sister Asia says. “I have to get everything together now because Kellan is going to be here in an hour to take me hiking, and after that we’re going to shoot pool.” “Hiking? Pool? Are you serious? You hate all of those things. Ever since you started dating Kellan everything about you has changed. You don’t go to museums, ballets or poetry readings anymore and we hardly hangout.”
“Look I know it seems like I’ve changed but that’s only because Kellan doesn’t like to do any of those things. And I’m sorry we haven’t been hanging out as much. It’s just that Kellan likes to spend time with me all the time,” you say placing your shoes in your animal print suitcase. “Do you hear yourself? ‘Kellan doesn’t like this’ ‘Kellan does that’. It’s like you’ve turned into another person for this guy. You don’t even dress the same. All you wear is black now.” “That’s because Kellan doesn’t like patterns or loud colors. Look he’s a great guy and I just want to make him happy.” “If being yourself doesn’t make him happy, then you’re with the wrong person.”
“But I love him.” “I don’t want to be alone.” These are popular phrases many of us use in order to justify peeling away our true selves for a man. Once we continue down this slippery slope, eventually our spirits start to fade. We become a fragment of our once wonderful selves.
God doesn’t want us to change ourselves to make a relationship work. He wants us to realize our value, and not allow anyone to make us feel unworthy. He wants us to understand that there is a difference between compromising and changing who we are for a relationship. He wants us to wait for Him to send us the RIGHT gentleman that will be in awe of our minds, our bodies and our spirits. He wants us to be proud of who we are.
“I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.”—Psalms 139:14
“Look I know it seems like I’ve changed but that’s only because Kellan doesn’t like to do any of those things. And I’m sorry we haven’t been hanging out as much. It’s just that Kellan likes to spend time with me all the time,” you say placing your shoes in your animal print suitcase. “Do you hear yourself? ‘Kellan doesn’t like this’ ‘Kellan does that’. It’s like you’ve turned into another person for this guy. You don’t even dress the same. All you wear is black now.” “That’s because Kellan doesn’t like patterns or loud colors. Look he’s a great guy and I just want to make him happy.” “If being yourself doesn’t make him happy, then you’re with the wrong person.”
“But I love him.” “I don’t want to be alone.” These are popular phrases many of us use in order to justify peeling away our true selves for a man. Once we continue down this slippery slope, eventually our spirits start to fade. We become a fragment of our once wonderful selves.
God doesn’t want us to change ourselves to make a relationship work. He wants us to realize our value, and not allow anyone to make us feel unworthy. He wants us to understand that there is a difference between compromising and changing who we are for a relationship. He wants us to wait for Him to send us the RIGHT gentleman that will be in awe of our minds, our bodies and our spirits. He wants us to be proud of who we are.
“I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.”—Psalms 139:14
Why Are You A Phony Friend?
As you jump into your car to meet up with your two “best friends” at your favorite café, you let negativity get the best of you. “I hope Kenya cancels on us and won’t be able to make it because I REALLY don’t feel like hearing her whiny voice today,” you say to yourself. A few minutes later you pull up to the café and you see Spring AND Kenya sitting at a table outside. “Great. She made it. Now I have to be bothered with her all day and listen to her talk nonstop and look at her dreadful hair that is in dire need of a makeover.”
“Hey ladies,” you say giving each of them a hug before you sit down. “Love the hair Kenya. Did you do something new to it,” you say with a phony smile. “I did. I decided to go for a beachy wave look,” she happily replies, caressing her hair. The whole time you’re with your “friends”, you laugh, smile and complement them and you mean none of it. In fact, you really don’t like them that much. So why do you call them your friends?
“I can’t stand her.” “Why can’t she just loosen up?” “She’s so boring.” These are popular phrases many of use to describe our “friends”. We purposely take time out of our lives to surround ourselves with people we can’t stand. We happily give them empty complements, shallow advice and deceitful love. We have no problem being their phony friends.
If we want to receive pure love and respect from others, we need to embody honesty. We need to be mature ladies that acknowledge and respect each other’s differences and realize that everyone is not going to be a healthy fit for our lives. This is imperative in order for God to bless us with people we can genuinely welcome into our lives--REAL friends.
“Better is open rebuke than concealed love. Wounds from a friend can be trusted, but deceitful are the kisses of an enemy.”—Proverbs 27:5-6
“Hey ladies,” you say giving each of them a hug before you sit down. “Love the hair Kenya. Did you do something new to it,” you say with a phony smile. “I did. I decided to go for a beachy wave look,” she happily replies, caressing her hair. The whole time you’re with your “friends”, you laugh, smile and complement them and you mean none of it. In fact, you really don’t like them that much. So why do you call them your friends?
“I can’t stand her.” “Why can’t she just loosen up?” “She’s so boring.” These are popular phrases many of use to describe our “friends”. We purposely take time out of our lives to surround ourselves with people we can’t stand. We happily give them empty complements, shallow advice and deceitful love. We have no problem being their phony friends.
If we want to receive pure love and respect from others, we need to embody honesty. We need to be mature ladies that acknowledge and respect each other’s differences and realize that everyone is not going to be a healthy fit for our lives. This is imperative in order for God to bless us with people we can genuinely welcome into our lives--REAL friends.
“Better is open rebuke than concealed love. Wounds from a friend can be trusted, but deceitful are the kisses of an enemy.”—Proverbs 27:5-6
Are You A Party Killer?
As you put on the final touches to complete your outfit, negative thoughts start flooding your mind. “I can’t wait to get this night over with so I can come home and go to sleep. I hate these dinner parties. Marcel better be glad I love him like a brother or else I wouldn’t be caught dead hanging around his lame friends,” you say as you walk out of your condo door.
Marcel greets you with a huge hug and smile as soon as you arrive at the party. “So good to see you. Come on everybody is outside eating dinner already,” he says, taking your hand. “I’ve already missed the first two courses? You mean I wasted my time getting dressed and coming here?” “Calm down. I’ll get the chef to make fix you a bowl of corn and crab bisque and a garden salad. Okay?” You nod in silence.
You are greeted with multiple “hellos” and “good to see yous” as soon as you walk out onto the Moroccan-inspired patio. “So Farrah how is everything going,” Diane asks, as you sit next to her. “I’m so disgusted. I’ve worked 50 hours this week and I still have tons of work to do when I get home. Then I have to watch my ratchet cousin’s bad child tomorrow…” As you continue your negative rant, it’s clear you’ve changed the once light-hearted, joyous atmosphere to cold and uneasy.
Society makes it okay to constantly complain and bring unnecessary negative energy into the home, church, job, school, etc. It’s become normal to curse others with harsh frowns, callous stares and cold hellos. Social responsibility has become a thing of the past.
It’s vital that we remember to be aware of our thoughts. Negative thoughts can lead to negative actions. And negative actions can lead to negative repercussions. God wants us to focus on Him and the blessings in our life. He wants us to be the light when we walk into a room, not the darkness. He wants us to take control of our minds and embrace happiness and spiritual peace.
“Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.”—Ephesians 4:31-32
Marcel greets you with a huge hug and smile as soon as you arrive at the party. “So good to see you. Come on everybody is outside eating dinner already,” he says, taking your hand. “I’ve already missed the first two courses? You mean I wasted my time getting dressed and coming here?” “Calm down. I’ll get the chef to make fix you a bowl of corn and crab bisque and a garden salad. Okay?” You nod in silence.
You are greeted with multiple “hellos” and “good to see yous” as soon as you walk out onto the Moroccan-inspired patio. “So Farrah how is everything going,” Diane asks, as you sit next to her. “I’m so disgusted. I’ve worked 50 hours this week and I still have tons of work to do when I get home. Then I have to watch my ratchet cousin’s bad child tomorrow…” As you continue your negative rant, it’s clear you’ve changed the once light-hearted, joyous atmosphere to cold and uneasy.
Society makes it okay to constantly complain and bring unnecessary negative energy into the home, church, job, school, etc. It’s become normal to curse others with harsh frowns, callous stares and cold hellos. Social responsibility has become a thing of the past.
It’s vital that we remember to be aware of our thoughts. Negative thoughts can lead to negative actions. And negative actions can lead to negative repercussions. God wants us to focus on Him and the blessings in our life. He wants us to be the light when we walk into a room, not the darkness. He wants us to take control of our minds and embrace happiness and spiritual peace.
“Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.”—Ephesians 4:31-32
Can You Let Go Of A Grudge?
It’s your family’s annual family reunion picnic and everyone is having an amazing time. The older adults are reminiscing about the “good ole’ days” and telling inside jokes, and the kids are playing on the swings and competing in potato sack races. You and the other twenty/thirty somethings are playing volleyball and softball.
Everything is going smoothly until your cousin Trish arrives. “Hey everybody.” She looks at you and nervously says, “Hey Keisha.” You roll your eyes and walk off. Your cousin Camille runs after you. “Keisha what’s wrong with you? Why did you run off like that?” “Uh hello, did you forget what Trish did to me two years ago?” “No I didn’t forget. I just thought you two had resolved your issues with each other. She did apologize after all.” “So she apologizes and I’m just supposed to forget I caught her making out with my boyfriend?” “No but at this point you should be at a place where you can at least say hello. This is not healthy. You can’t continue to hold grudges like this. If you keep this up, you won’t be able to be around anyone because at some point we will all do and say something that will upset everyone in our lives. You need to let go and let God. You’ll be happier.”
“She hurt me, so I’m going to hurt her.” “Why should I forgive him? He hasn’t asked for forgiveness.” “I will never forget what happened to me.” Society encourages us to hold on to negativity. It’s become okay to hold on to pain and curse innocent people with it all in the name of “I was hurt 20 years ago, so that’s why I hurt you.”
God wants us to live a life free from negativity and pain. He wants us to let go of what someone has done us so we can enjoy the present and look toward the future. It’s important to know that He doesn’t expect us to forget what someone has done, but He wants us to be able to see that painful encounter as a spiritual growth opportunity. We have to learn to let go for our benefit, not the other person. We have to see forgiveness as a sign of freedom, not weakness. We have to learn to choose happiness.
“For if you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.”—Matthew 6 14-15
Everything is going smoothly until your cousin Trish arrives. “Hey everybody.” She looks at you and nervously says, “Hey Keisha.” You roll your eyes and walk off. Your cousin Camille runs after you. “Keisha what’s wrong with you? Why did you run off like that?” “Uh hello, did you forget what Trish did to me two years ago?” “No I didn’t forget. I just thought you two had resolved your issues with each other. She did apologize after all.” “So she apologizes and I’m just supposed to forget I caught her making out with my boyfriend?” “No but at this point you should be at a place where you can at least say hello. This is not healthy. You can’t continue to hold grudges like this. If you keep this up, you won’t be able to be around anyone because at some point we will all do and say something that will upset everyone in our lives. You need to let go and let God. You’ll be happier.”
“She hurt me, so I’m going to hurt her.” “Why should I forgive him? He hasn’t asked for forgiveness.” “I will never forget what happened to me.” Society encourages us to hold on to negativity. It’s become okay to hold on to pain and curse innocent people with it all in the name of “I was hurt 20 years ago, so that’s why I hurt you.”
God wants us to live a life free from negativity and pain. He wants us to let go of what someone has done us so we can enjoy the present and look toward the future. It’s important to know that He doesn’t expect us to forget what someone has done, but He wants us to be able to see that painful encounter as a spiritual growth opportunity. We have to learn to let go for our benefit, not the other person. We have to see forgiveness as a sign of freedom, not weakness. We have to learn to choose happiness.
“For if you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.”—Matthew 6 14-15
Is Bullying Killing Your Spirit?
Church just ended and you’re about to go to your car when Carla stops you. “Skala wait. I wanted to tell you that the young women’s ministry is having a weekend getaway trip and I would love for you to come. We’re going to have a testimony session, sisterhood empowerment circles and tons of other things.” “Thanks but I think I’ll pass,” you say, hoping she doesn’t ask you why. “Why not? It’s going to be sooo much fun.” “Well honestly I just don’t think I’m coming back to church at all, let alone going on the trip.”
Carla gasps, “You’ve got to be kidding. Why don’t you want to come to church anymore?” You paused a few seconds before responding, “Because I’m tired of coming to church and being ridiculed and hated by most of the females in the ministry. They hate me. Every time I volunteer to be a part of a group or committee, they scrutinize everything I do for no reason. And it’s not just at church. It’s on my job too. I’m just tired of people always putting me down. I can’t do anything right. I give up.”
We live in a world where jealousy and insecurity are free to ravage our minds and spirits, leaving us almost lifeless. We are no longer told to love our neighbor and be our brother’s/sister’s keeper. We are no longer taught to shake off negativity from others and continue to embrace our happiness and success.
It’s vital that we realize that God doesn’t want us to live a life of running away and hiding because someone doesn’t like or agree with us. He wants us to stand tall in His truth and remain confident in ourselves. He wants us to not constantly play the victim, but be the VICTOR in our lives. He wants us to be conquerors.
“Be strong and courageous. Do not fear or be in dread of them, for it is the Lord your God who goes with you. He will not leave you or forsake you.”—Deuteronomy 31:6
Carla gasps, “You’ve got to be kidding. Why don’t you want to come to church anymore?” You paused a few seconds before responding, “Because I’m tired of coming to church and being ridiculed and hated by most of the females in the ministry. They hate me. Every time I volunteer to be a part of a group or committee, they scrutinize everything I do for no reason. And it’s not just at church. It’s on my job too. I’m just tired of people always putting me down. I can’t do anything right. I give up.”
We live in a world where jealousy and insecurity are free to ravage our minds and spirits, leaving us almost lifeless. We are no longer told to love our neighbor and be our brother’s/sister’s keeper. We are no longer taught to shake off negativity from others and continue to embrace our happiness and success.
It’s vital that we realize that God doesn’t want us to live a life of running away and hiding because someone doesn’t like or agree with us. He wants us to stand tall in His truth and remain confident in ourselves. He wants us to not constantly play the victim, but be the VICTOR in our lives. He wants us to be conquerors.
“Be strong and courageous. Do not fear or be in dread of them, for it is the Lord your God who goes with you. He will not leave you or forsake you.”—Deuteronomy 31:6
Are Your Bad Habits Holding You Hostage?
It’s 9:20 in the morning and you’ve just arrived at your job, although you were supposed to be there for 8:30 to present your new feature story series at the morning meeting. “Where have you been? I had to do the presentation by myself—again. I’m tired of covering for you,” Paula snaps. “I know I’m sorry. My alarm clock didn’t go off and I woke up 20 minutes late and there was traffic on the interstate,” you say. “Kellie save it. You’re never on time for anything. You never turn in story pitches on time and you never give me your stories on time and I’m tired of it. From now on you’re on your own. I’ve asked to be moved to the beauty editorial staff where I can work with people that respect my time and the work that I do.”
After Paula storms off, you sit down and stare at all of the work on your desk that you’re late turning in. You check the messages from your boss telling you that you need to get it together or you’ll lose your job position. As you shuffle through all of the papers on your desk, you think about all of the times your procrastination has made you miss countless opportunities with jobs, family, friends and romantic relationships. “I know putting things off is a bad habit and that I need to be more discipline, but I don’t know if I can change something I’ve been doing almost since I was born.”
“That’s just who I am.” “No one’s perfect.” “I can’t help it.” These are phrases we use constantly in order to ignore the real problem—copping out. We allow our flaws to consume our spirits instead of releasing them to the Lord and fighting to be better versions of ourselves.
God wants us to release ourselves from the bondage that is sin/bad habits. He wants us to realize that we deserve to have productive lives minus the self-inflicted drama. He wants us to always be honest with ourselves about our flaws if we are to be our best. He wants us to be drama free fabulous females.
“Whoever loves discipline loves knowledge, but he who hates reproof is stupid.”—Hebrews 12:11
After Paula storms off, you sit down and stare at all of the work on your desk that you’re late turning in. You check the messages from your boss telling you that you need to get it together or you’ll lose your job position. As you shuffle through all of the papers on your desk, you think about all of the times your procrastination has made you miss countless opportunities with jobs, family, friends and romantic relationships. “I know putting things off is a bad habit and that I need to be more discipline, but I don’t know if I can change something I’ve been doing almost since I was born.”
“That’s just who I am.” “No one’s perfect.” “I can’t help it.” These are phrases we use constantly in order to ignore the real problem—copping out. We allow our flaws to consume our spirits instead of releasing them to the Lord and fighting to be better versions of ourselves.
God wants us to release ourselves from the bondage that is sin/bad habits. He wants us to realize that we deserve to have productive lives minus the self-inflicted drama. He wants us to always be honest with ourselves about our flaws if we are to be our best. He wants us to be drama free fabulous females.
“Whoever loves discipline loves knowledge, but he who hates reproof is stupid.”—Hebrews 12:11
Are You Ashamed To Be Celibate?
Its spring break and you and your besties have decided to go to L.A. to run away from winter’s gloom and embrace the sun. As soon as you arrive, you all check in at the hotel, put on your tiniest bikinis (you wear a one piece unlike friends) and you all make a dash for the beach.
After an hour of playing in the water, you all decide to relax under two oversized yellow umbrellas. “Sasha Jamal told me that y’all broke up. What happened,” Tai asks you. “He’s a good guy, it just didn’t work out,” you respond, hoping Tai will drop the subject and Fatima won’t join in. “What do you mean it just didn’t work out? That boy is fine girl. What he wasn’t hittin’ right,” she chuckles. “It has nothing to do with that. We just wanted different things out of life.” “I’ll take that as he wasn’t hittin’ it right,” Fatima laughs.
As your friends continue joking about your failed relationship, you contemplate telling them the truth. You’re a virgin. The only thing Jamal got to “hit” was a baseball when y’all played with his friends last month. Your vow to remain pure until marriage is the reason you broke up with Jamal. You were too afraid to tell him why you didn’t want to have sex, so you just broke up with him instead. As you continue contemplating, you decide to keep your beliefs secret. “They’ll never understand me or my choices. I’ll just keep it to myself.”
“No one waits to have sex anymore.” “It’s unnatural to be inexperienced by 19 years old.” “He’ll leave you if you don’t.” These are ideologies that permeate our minds from almost the day we are born. Magazines, TV, internet and music saturate our spirits with the glamorization of casual sex. "Waiting" has become an archaic notion that many have buried.
It’s imperative that we know that God didn’t create guidelines for our lives to harm us or stop us from having fun. He created them to save us from unwanted pregnancies, STDs, bad reputations and heartache. He wants us to have sex with GENTLEMEN that love us enough to make us their wives. Not some boy that just wants to “hit it and quit it.” He wants us to remember that sex doesn’t keep a man, love does. If sex kept a man, no one would ever get divorced. Be strong and be proud of your standards and God will bless you with a GENTLEMAN.
“Who can find a virtuous woman? For her price is far above rubies.” –Proverbs 31:10
After an hour of playing in the water, you all decide to relax under two oversized yellow umbrellas. “Sasha Jamal told me that y’all broke up. What happened,” Tai asks you. “He’s a good guy, it just didn’t work out,” you respond, hoping Tai will drop the subject and Fatima won’t join in. “What do you mean it just didn’t work out? That boy is fine girl. What he wasn’t hittin’ right,” she chuckles. “It has nothing to do with that. We just wanted different things out of life.” “I’ll take that as he wasn’t hittin’ it right,” Fatima laughs.
As your friends continue joking about your failed relationship, you contemplate telling them the truth. You’re a virgin. The only thing Jamal got to “hit” was a baseball when y’all played with his friends last month. Your vow to remain pure until marriage is the reason you broke up with Jamal. You were too afraid to tell him why you didn’t want to have sex, so you just broke up with him instead. As you continue contemplating, you decide to keep your beliefs secret. “They’ll never understand me or my choices. I’ll just keep it to myself.”
“No one waits to have sex anymore.” “It’s unnatural to be inexperienced by 19 years old.” “He’ll leave you if you don’t.” These are ideologies that permeate our minds from almost the day we are born. Magazines, TV, internet and music saturate our spirits with the glamorization of casual sex. "Waiting" has become an archaic notion that many have buried.
It’s imperative that we know that God didn’t create guidelines for our lives to harm us or stop us from having fun. He created them to save us from unwanted pregnancies, STDs, bad reputations and heartache. He wants us to have sex with GENTLEMEN that love us enough to make us their wives. Not some boy that just wants to “hit it and quit it.” He wants us to remember that sex doesn’t keep a man, love does. If sex kept a man, no one would ever get divorced. Be strong and be proud of your standards and God will bless you with a GENTLEMAN.
“Who can find a virtuous woman? For her price is far above rubies.” –Proverbs 31:10
Can You Handle Unexpected Loss Positively?
It’s 5:30 in the evening and you’re wearing your favorite royal blue lace A-Line dress and nude patent leather almond toe pumps. You finish off your look with a shimmery wine-colored lip gloss. You smile to yourself as you think about how happy you are to go out and celebrate your fiancé getting a promotion at the architectural firm for which he works. The sound of the phone ringing takes you out of your fantasy. When you answer, your cousin tells you that your fiancé has died in a car accident five minutes from your home. Your smile melts and your composure flees leaving you in turmoil. The dinner plans with him are permanently cancelled and your “forever life together” will never begin.
Fast forward five years later and your once positive attitude remains a thing of the past and the smile you once shared with the world never returned. Since your fiancé died, your once positive productive life has turned into a graveyard of “why me’s”, “shoulda, woulda, couldas” and “I give up”. And no matter how much your family and friends try to help you move on and be happy, you remain content in turmoil.
In life we will experience many different emotions, including unexpected pain. Whether its death, a breakup or mental, physical or spiritual illness, the pain will be deep, confusing and seem eternal. Pain doesn’t have an easy on and off switch. It can linger for days, months and years…if we let it.
It’s important to know that time doesn’t “heal all wounds” if we allow pain to hold us hostage. God doesn’t want us to continuously wallow in our pain. He wants us to release it to Him in exchange for His peace. He wants us to use every experience in our lives as a spiritual opportunity to get closer to Him. He wants us to be at peace in the storms of life. Spiritual healing doesn’t happen overnight, but it will happen. With every ounce of pain you give to Him, every minute will become less and less painful. Just trust Him and you will be happy again.
“The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit.” –Psalms 34:18
Fast forward five years later and your once positive attitude remains a thing of the past and the smile you once shared with the world never returned. Since your fiancé died, your once positive productive life has turned into a graveyard of “why me’s”, “shoulda, woulda, couldas” and “I give up”. And no matter how much your family and friends try to help you move on and be happy, you remain content in turmoil.
In life we will experience many different emotions, including unexpected pain. Whether its death, a breakup or mental, physical or spiritual illness, the pain will be deep, confusing and seem eternal. Pain doesn’t have an easy on and off switch. It can linger for days, months and years…if we let it.
It’s important to know that time doesn’t “heal all wounds” if we allow pain to hold us hostage. God doesn’t want us to continuously wallow in our pain. He wants us to release it to Him in exchange for His peace. He wants us to use every experience in our lives as a spiritual opportunity to get closer to Him. He wants us to be at peace in the storms of life. Spiritual healing doesn’t happen overnight, but it will happen. With every ounce of pain you give to Him, every minute will become less and less painful. Just trust Him and you will be happy again.
“The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit.” –Psalms 34:18
Is Your Definition Of Love The Same As His?
It’s your 30th birthday and you’re ecstatic to see what your fiancé has planned. “He forgot my birthday last year so I know he has to have major plans for me this time,” you say to yourself. Five minutes later he calls. “Happy birthday baby I’m pulling into your driveway so open the door,” he says. You skip to the door and as soon as you open it, your heart sinks. “Happy birthday baby,” he says again, handing you a large pizza and a sad looking one-layer six inch cake.
“What’s this,” you ask. “What do you mean what is this? It’s your birthday dinner and present,” he smiles, sitting on the sofa. “You can’t be serious. You really think all I’m worth is a lousy pizza and this crusty looking cake,” you snap, slamming the pizza and cake on your kitchen counter.
“What’s wrong with you? I thought you’d be happy. At least I remembered your birthday this time,” he chuckles. “This is ridiculous. Last year you forgot my birthday. For Christmas you gave me a 20 dollar Walmart gift card and now this. And that’s not the only problem I have with you. You never want to take me anywhere. We’ve been out five times in six months. You never tell me I’m pretty or you like what I’m wearing. And you hardly ever call me. I always have to call you. Do you really love me? Do you know how a fiancé is supposed to treat the love of his life?” “Look I don’t see what the problem is. My parents have been married for 36 years and they never went anywhere or bought extravagant things. My mom never complained…” As he continues giving you reasons of why you’re overreacting, you begin contemplating that you may be engaged to the wrong man because you all have different definitions of love.
“He may not be what I want, but he loves me.” “I can change him.” “We have different beliefs and values, but we’ll be fine.” These are common lies we tell ourselves when we’re a relationship with the wrong man. We ignore the two ton pink elephant in the room that is non-compatibility/unequally yoked.
God wants us to be in happy prosperous relationships. He wants us to be with a GENTLEMAN that compliments our spirits and interests-someone that praises and encourages us to be our best selves. It’s imperative that we never settle for the wrong person just so we can be in a “relationship”. Wait for God to send you someone that loves as you love and your life will be filled with LASTING LOVE.
“Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?”—2 Corinthians 6:14
“What’s this,” you ask. “What do you mean what is this? It’s your birthday dinner and present,” he smiles, sitting on the sofa. “You can’t be serious. You really think all I’m worth is a lousy pizza and this crusty looking cake,” you snap, slamming the pizza and cake on your kitchen counter.
“What’s wrong with you? I thought you’d be happy. At least I remembered your birthday this time,” he chuckles. “This is ridiculous. Last year you forgot my birthday. For Christmas you gave me a 20 dollar Walmart gift card and now this. And that’s not the only problem I have with you. You never want to take me anywhere. We’ve been out five times in six months. You never tell me I’m pretty or you like what I’m wearing. And you hardly ever call me. I always have to call you. Do you really love me? Do you know how a fiancé is supposed to treat the love of his life?” “Look I don’t see what the problem is. My parents have been married for 36 years and they never went anywhere or bought extravagant things. My mom never complained…” As he continues giving you reasons of why you’re overreacting, you begin contemplating that you may be engaged to the wrong man because you all have different definitions of love.
“He may not be what I want, but he loves me.” “I can change him.” “We have different beliefs and values, but we’ll be fine.” These are common lies we tell ourselves when we’re a relationship with the wrong man. We ignore the two ton pink elephant in the room that is non-compatibility/unequally yoked.
God wants us to be in happy prosperous relationships. He wants us to be with a GENTLEMAN that compliments our spirits and interests-someone that praises and encourages us to be our best selves. It’s imperative that we never settle for the wrong person just so we can be in a “relationship”. Wait for God to send you someone that loves as you love and your life will be filled with LASTING LOVE.
“Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?”—2 Corinthians 6:14
COLORFUL WOMEN OF FAITH SERIES
Past, Present & Future: Legacy of Black Women Blazing The Trail
By
Syreeta Gordon
Through the eyes of a child you have an innate ability to see right into the soul of the matriarchs of your home. Growing up looking into the eyes of my mother she was a beacon of light that was the teacher, nurse, preacher, boo boo kisser, CEO, CFO, Master Chef and counselor that was the anchor of our family. The list would include many hats that she was able to wear being a single mother of four children.
As I look into my past, she was the woman that I modeled myself after—a woman of grace, integrity and strength. She sustained herself in a time where many mothers that surrounded us in our neighborhood began to give up. In a place where the children became secondary to the “man” of the moment, and loneliness took precedence over that temporary relationship, my mamma said, “No”. There is a higher calling and standard that had to be achieved in order to fight for the peace and sanctity of our home.
In school, there wasn’t much information about our heritage, black history. It wasn’t until I graduated from high school and went to college that I began to really study and hear about the richness of my past as an African American. African American meaning we are mixed with many different races and cultures that come together into one melting pot.
The two women in history that struck me the most came in a time period in my life when I was teaching secondary education. I read more about the lives of Madame C.J. Walker and Zora Neale Hurston. The personal stories behind these women made them the outstanding entrepreneurs and writers in history we know today.
The way Madame C.J. Walker was able to hold on to a dream that God had given her and turn it into a profitable business was so inspiring to me. I didn’t value these women until I made the effort to research their back stories. They penetrated my soul. They inspired me to keep pursuing my dream of becoming a writer and entrepreneur to this day. These women from the past and present have continued to motivate me to become more, do more and be more.
“Now faith is confidence in what we hope for and assurance about what we do not see”.—Hebrews 11:1
Syreeta Gordon is writing her own history as she bravely pursues her dreams. She is a lifestyle blogger, virtual administrative assistant, freelance content writer and social media strategist. Her hope is to guide women and families by educating, inspiring, and guiding mothers to make sound decisions in their lives so they can achieve their goals.
If you’re looking for a tribe, please head over and join Pecan Momma Tales Facebook group. We love to discuss relationships, parenting issues and revelations as we pursue our faith.
Website: PecanMommaTales
Twitter: @PecanMomma
Facebook: facebook.com/PecanMomma
Instagram: @PecanMomma
As I look into my past, she was the woman that I modeled myself after—a woman of grace, integrity and strength. She sustained herself in a time where many mothers that surrounded us in our neighborhood began to give up. In a place where the children became secondary to the “man” of the moment, and loneliness took precedence over that temporary relationship, my mamma said, “No”. There is a higher calling and standard that had to be achieved in order to fight for the peace and sanctity of our home.
In school, there wasn’t much information about our heritage, black history. It wasn’t until I graduated from high school and went to college that I began to really study and hear about the richness of my past as an African American. African American meaning we are mixed with many different races and cultures that come together into one melting pot.
The two women in history that struck me the most came in a time period in my life when I was teaching secondary education. I read more about the lives of Madame C.J. Walker and Zora Neale Hurston. The personal stories behind these women made them the outstanding entrepreneurs and writers in history we know today.
The way Madame C.J. Walker was able to hold on to a dream that God had given her and turn it into a profitable business was so inspiring to me. I didn’t value these women until I made the effort to research their back stories. They penetrated my soul. They inspired me to keep pursuing my dream of becoming a writer and entrepreneur to this day. These women from the past and present have continued to motivate me to become more, do more and be more.
“Now faith is confidence in what we hope for and assurance about what we do not see”.—Hebrews 11:1
Syreeta Gordon is writing her own history as she bravely pursues her dreams. She is a lifestyle blogger, virtual administrative assistant, freelance content writer and social media strategist. Her hope is to guide women and families by educating, inspiring, and guiding mothers to make sound decisions in their lives so they can achieve their goals.
If you’re looking for a tribe, please head over and join Pecan Momma Tales Facebook group. We love to discuss relationships, parenting issues and revelations as we pursue our faith.
Website: PecanMommaTales
Twitter: @PecanMomma
Facebook: facebook.com/PecanMomma
Instagram: @PecanMomma
COLORFUL WOMEN OF FAITH SERIES
A Storyteller Of Faith And Greatness
By
Miranda Childers
I am a proud descendent of storytellers. In my culture, our modern day griots (West African storytellers) are passionate and praised for their aptness in displaying this nuanced ability. When I was a child my grandmother, the matriarch of our family’s interwoven mix of Irish, Cherokee and African heritage, was affectionately called “Big Mama” of this gift. As the matriarch, she carefully chose to pass down this oral history with me and I was elated.
She spoke words of life over me saying, “One day, Miranda, you too will be a great storyteller.” I learned her stories, not only in my native tongue of English, but also in French, as I verbalized alongside the West African family members that lived with us until I was a teen. My Grandmother even rejoiced when I was able to translate them into Spanish as my fluency grew during my travels to places like Argentina, Spain, and Uruguay. When Big Mama died the need to bring the words to life she always spoke over me of being a great storyteller became my upmost objective. Her gift to me was the love of interpreting and sharing experiences, thoughts, and feelings to people.
As a painfully shy child, I wasn’t always so sure of my capacity to understand this complex form of communication. For most of my life, my nerves kept me from publicly displaying with joy all of the moments I excitedly acted out privately in front my of dolls, siblings, and trusted friends. Although my grandmother would encourage my need to express myself, my natural introversion would always win. Big Mama was my biggest cheerleader and would reassure me that one day, when the time was right, “I would know what it was I needed to know.” This was a phrase she used often, though I did not understand. And then my grandmother died.
Her death was so devastating to me that I could not bring myself to attend her funeral. Years later my cousins and nephew who had never met my Big Mama, asked me to describe her. I was surprised by the manner I chose to do so. With eager anticipation, my family corralled around me as I vividly recounted her phrases, reenacted her mannerisms, and resurrected some of the funniest scenes of her life. My reenactments were so vivid that those moments came alive to my family and me. It was then that I understood the phrase she had spoken over me so long ago. In that moment, I intuitively knew that the art of reenacting a story was truly the art of understanding the purpose and meaning of the story. Doing so allowed me to convey the message, permeate a feeling, and have an interaction with my audience.
Plainly stated, it wasn’t about me. This realization ignited my fire for storytelling and confirmed my decision to follow a career as an actress. It has not been an easy road; however, it is one that I have been proud to be on because on this journey I have truly learned to walk by faith. My grandmother would recite a special Bible verse to me. “Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.” Hebrews 11:1 This remains one of my most trusted and favorite verses. It has helped me to maintain the peace that my grandmother instilled in me so long ago.
Miranda Childers is the creator and CEO of Book of Eve Cosmetics, a certified MUA and member of the IAPO (International Association of Professional Makeup Artists), Actress, Writer, and Teaching Artist who got an early start in the beauty industry. Working for several well-known cosmetic brands helped Miranda develop her skill set as an artist and allowed her to see the lack of high quality makeup for ethnic women.
This void motivated her to create a line that is geared toward creating inspirational products for women who are not served by traditional makeup. Her past endeavors have allowed her the opportunity to travel to places like Paris, England, and Argentina, and to study under great teachers like the incomparable Maurice Stein. With Book of Eve Cosmetics, Miranda hopes to introduce a line of products that helps women find their next chapter in beauty.
Website: www.bookofevecosmetics.com
Twitter: @bookofeve
Instagram: bookofeve
Facebook: Book Of Eve Cosmetics
She spoke words of life over me saying, “One day, Miranda, you too will be a great storyteller.” I learned her stories, not only in my native tongue of English, but also in French, as I verbalized alongside the West African family members that lived with us until I was a teen. My Grandmother even rejoiced when I was able to translate them into Spanish as my fluency grew during my travels to places like Argentina, Spain, and Uruguay. When Big Mama died the need to bring the words to life she always spoke over me of being a great storyteller became my upmost objective. Her gift to me was the love of interpreting and sharing experiences, thoughts, and feelings to people.
As a painfully shy child, I wasn’t always so sure of my capacity to understand this complex form of communication. For most of my life, my nerves kept me from publicly displaying with joy all of the moments I excitedly acted out privately in front my of dolls, siblings, and trusted friends. Although my grandmother would encourage my need to express myself, my natural introversion would always win. Big Mama was my biggest cheerleader and would reassure me that one day, when the time was right, “I would know what it was I needed to know.” This was a phrase she used often, though I did not understand. And then my grandmother died.
Her death was so devastating to me that I could not bring myself to attend her funeral. Years later my cousins and nephew who had never met my Big Mama, asked me to describe her. I was surprised by the manner I chose to do so. With eager anticipation, my family corralled around me as I vividly recounted her phrases, reenacted her mannerisms, and resurrected some of the funniest scenes of her life. My reenactments were so vivid that those moments came alive to my family and me. It was then that I understood the phrase she had spoken over me so long ago. In that moment, I intuitively knew that the art of reenacting a story was truly the art of understanding the purpose and meaning of the story. Doing so allowed me to convey the message, permeate a feeling, and have an interaction with my audience.
Plainly stated, it wasn’t about me. This realization ignited my fire for storytelling and confirmed my decision to follow a career as an actress. It has not been an easy road; however, it is one that I have been proud to be on because on this journey I have truly learned to walk by faith. My grandmother would recite a special Bible verse to me. “Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.” Hebrews 11:1 This remains one of my most trusted and favorite verses. It has helped me to maintain the peace that my grandmother instilled in me so long ago.
Miranda Childers is the creator and CEO of Book of Eve Cosmetics, a certified MUA and member of the IAPO (International Association of Professional Makeup Artists), Actress, Writer, and Teaching Artist who got an early start in the beauty industry. Working for several well-known cosmetic brands helped Miranda develop her skill set as an artist and allowed her to see the lack of high quality makeup for ethnic women.
This void motivated her to create a line that is geared toward creating inspirational products for women who are not served by traditional makeup. Her past endeavors have allowed her the opportunity to travel to places like Paris, England, and Argentina, and to study under great teachers like the incomparable Maurice Stein. With Book of Eve Cosmetics, Miranda hopes to introduce a line of products that helps women find their next chapter in beauty.
Website: www.bookofevecosmetics.com
Twitter: @bookofeve
Instagram: bookofeve
Facebook: Book Of Eve Cosmetics
COLORFUL WOMEN OF FAITH SERIES
Melancholy Reflections
I am your mother…
I am your father…
I am your skin…
I am your hair…
I am AF-RI-CA.
I was there when your ancestors, my children, were kings and queens of their tribes.
I was there when my children were filled with pride, joy and wealth.
I saw my land when it was overflowing with gold, diamonds and oil.
I saw my children embody their languages, religions and traditions with ease.
And then it happened—the Maafa began.
Foreigners—foreigners with skin as white as the white of my eyes invaded me.
They did not come with smiles; they came with whips and chains.
They took my son--
They took my daughter—
They took my husband—
They took me!!!
They raped my land of its most precious possession—my children.
They chained them together—adults and children alike.
They put us in cages not fit for cattle.
They brought us to the ocean and put us on an enormous contraption called ships.
They stacked us 2 by 2s, 3 by 3s like we were nothing more than a pile of rocks.
They separated families.
Some on one ship, some on another.
They raped me from the time we were put on the first ship, until the end of slavery.
For 400 years, I was violated and as a result, my children’s skin color began to change.
Their hair began to lose its kink.
They began to lose their Mandinka and Yoruba accents and started to embrace the Spanish, Portuguese, French and English that belonged to their new father.
They became accustomed to picking cotton in the U.S., sugar in Dominican Republic and Puerto Rico, tobacco in Brazil and mining in Mexico.
It became normal to answer to European names or the word nigger.
It became normal for my children to hate me—hate being black.
It became normal for them to wish me away to have a better life and some of them were successful in claiming another part of themselves.
And now it’s been 565 years since the first ship invaded my soul and my children still deny me…
Belittle me…
Forget me…
"The Lord himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged."-Deuteronomy 31:9
I am your father…
I am your skin…
I am your hair…
I am AF-RI-CA.
I was there when your ancestors, my children, were kings and queens of their tribes.
I was there when my children were filled with pride, joy and wealth.
I saw my land when it was overflowing with gold, diamonds and oil.
I saw my children embody their languages, religions and traditions with ease.
And then it happened—the Maafa began.
Foreigners—foreigners with skin as white as the white of my eyes invaded me.
They did not come with smiles; they came with whips and chains.
They took my son--
They took my daughter—
They took my husband—
They took me!!!
They raped my land of its most precious possession—my children.
They chained them together—adults and children alike.
They put us in cages not fit for cattle.
They brought us to the ocean and put us on an enormous contraption called ships.
They stacked us 2 by 2s, 3 by 3s like we were nothing more than a pile of rocks.
They separated families.
Some on one ship, some on another.
They raped me from the time we were put on the first ship, until the end of slavery.
For 400 years, I was violated and as a result, my children’s skin color began to change.
Their hair began to lose its kink.
They began to lose their Mandinka and Yoruba accents and started to embrace the Spanish, Portuguese, French and English that belonged to their new father.
They became accustomed to picking cotton in the U.S., sugar in Dominican Republic and Puerto Rico, tobacco in Brazil and mining in Mexico.
It became normal to answer to European names or the word nigger.
It became normal for my children to hate me—hate being black.
It became normal for them to wish me away to have a better life and some of them were successful in claiming another part of themselves.
And now it’s been 565 years since the first ship invaded my soul and my children still deny me…
Belittle me…
Forget me…
"The Lord himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged."-Deuteronomy 31:9
COLORFUL WOMEN OF FAITH SERIES
A Proud Woman Of Faith And Ancestral Pride
By
Andrea Imafidon
“But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.” -Matthew 6:33-34
I think about this scripture every time I’m faced with fear, worry and anxiety. I ponder on this scripture because every time I want to runaway and hide from fear or the world, I put the kingdom first through prayer and meditation.
My freshmen year at Tuskegee University I, a young woman from Boston, MA, would finally realize how this scripture would transform my life. I often ask myself when I am faced with fear, “What would my dear ancestors do in this situation?”
I come from a strong lineage of women whose faith in Jehovah helped them to overcome being mothers at a young age, overcome limited education, survive post slavery, abuse, tragedies and the Jim Crow era in segregated Alabama. My great-grandmother, maternal and paternal grandmothers, aunts and mother paved the way for me to become a first generation college graduate. They also helped me serve and coach women to rediscover their divine assignment, encourage them to use their voice and power to help heal and love themselves and others.
My ancestral lineage consists of strong, determined females who put God first to not only survive, but to birth a woman like myself who is able to freely pursue my life’s passion and purpose and tap into my unlimited greatness and live fearlessly and unapologetically. I give thanks to Jehovah and my ancestors for their guidance and love.
Andrea is the brain child of Brown Girl From Boston, a personal development and coaching blog that inspires and empower women of ethnic diversity everywhere to live life to the fullest, purposely and fearlessly. Andrea is a professional coach with a certification in personal development coaching from The CaPP Institute. She holds a Master’s degree in Social Work from The University of Southern Mississippi and a Bachelor’s degree from Tuskegee University.
Blog: browngirlfromboston.com
Twitter: @browngirlboston
Facebook: browngirlfromboston
I think about this scripture every time I’m faced with fear, worry and anxiety. I ponder on this scripture because every time I want to runaway and hide from fear or the world, I put the kingdom first through prayer and meditation.
My freshmen year at Tuskegee University I, a young woman from Boston, MA, would finally realize how this scripture would transform my life. I often ask myself when I am faced with fear, “What would my dear ancestors do in this situation?”
I come from a strong lineage of women whose faith in Jehovah helped them to overcome being mothers at a young age, overcome limited education, survive post slavery, abuse, tragedies and the Jim Crow era in segregated Alabama. My great-grandmother, maternal and paternal grandmothers, aunts and mother paved the way for me to become a first generation college graduate. They also helped me serve and coach women to rediscover their divine assignment, encourage them to use their voice and power to help heal and love themselves and others.
My ancestral lineage consists of strong, determined females who put God first to not only survive, but to birth a woman like myself who is able to freely pursue my life’s passion and purpose and tap into my unlimited greatness and live fearlessly and unapologetically. I give thanks to Jehovah and my ancestors for their guidance and love.
Andrea is the brain child of Brown Girl From Boston, a personal development and coaching blog that inspires and empower women of ethnic diversity everywhere to live life to the fullest, purposely and fearlessly. Andrea is a professional coach with a certification in personal development coaching from The CaPP Institute. She holds a Master’s degree in Social Work from The University of Southern Mississippi and a Bachelor’s degree from Tuskegee University.
Blog: browngirlfromboston.com
Twitter: @browngirlboston
Facebook: browngirlfromboston
COLORFUL WOMEN OF FAITH SERIES
Hard Work & Determination—A lineage of supreme greatness…
By
Tab K.
As I sit back and reflect on the history of our nation, I am oftentimes reminded of the immense sacrifice that our ancestors had to make in order for us to have the privileges and freedom that we have today. From the bottomless pit of struggle and hardship, our people have overcome time after time and we continue to rise to the top. I credit this phenomenal resilience to the mind set of “hard work and determination.”
Throughout slavery, our ancestors worked HARD and remained steadfast regardless of the situation they were dealt. During the Civil Rights Movement, our people were DETERMINED that change would come, and they did not give up until things changed for the better. As I sit back and ponder, I am undoubtedly convinced that I come from a lineage of supreme greatness, a history of hard workers and go-getters, trend-setters and believers. A history of people who did not, would not and could not give up, and because of that, I am inspired and motivated to make a difference and persevere no matter what. Because of my ancestors, I am most certain that hard work and determination equals supreme greatness.
I will always be grateful to my hard working grandparents and my ancestors before them for all of their sacrifices and hard work. It inspires me to be better, work harder and overcome any and every obstacle I may face. I am determined to work hard and I am determined to make a difference. I am determined to be great, only because it is in my blood line. A lineage of supreme greatness…..
“Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father which is in heaven.” – Matthew 5:16
HumbleBeauty is an inspirational blog about fashion, style, beauty, and overall well-being. Born & raised in the south, I have always had a passion for fashion & an eye for style. I believe that true beauty shines from within and if a person is feeling good on the inside, it will show outwardly!
Website: Humblebeauty29.blogspot.com
Twitter: : @humblebeauty29
Instagram: @humblebeauty29
Email: humblebeauty29@gmail.com
Throughout slavery, our ancestors worked HARD and remained steadfast regardless of the situation they were dealt. During the Civil Rights Movement, our people were DETERMINED that change would come, and they did not give up until things changed for the better. As I sit back and ponder, I am undoubtedly convinced that I come from a lineage of supreme greatness, a history of hard workers and go-getters, trend-setters and believers. A history of people who did not, would not and could not give up, and because of that, I am inspired and motivated to make a difference and persevere no matter what. Because of my ancestors, I am most certain that hard work and determination equals supreme greatness.
I will always be grateful to my hard working grandparents and my ancestors before them for all of their sacrifices and hard work. It inspires me to be better, work harder and overcome any and every obstacle I may face. I am determined to work hard and I am determined to make a difference. I am determined to be great, only because it is in my blood line. A lineage of supreme greatness…..
“Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father which is in heaven.” – Matthew 5:16
HumbleBeauty is an inspirational blog about fashion, style, beauty, and overall well-being. Born & raised in the south, I have always had a passion for fashion & an eye for style. I believe that true beauty shines from within and if a person is feeling good on the inside, it will show outwardly!
Website: Humblebeauty29.blogspot.com
Twitter: : @humblebeauty29
Instagram: @humblebeauty29
Email: humblebeauty29@gmail.com
Do You Have The Patience To Pursue Success?
D’Angelo’s new song “Really Love” is permeating throughout the ballet studio as you do a freestyle routine. With each word and melody he sings, you become more engulfed in your flawless pirouettes and grand jetés. In the middle of your enthralling routine, your ballet instructor walks in and turns the music off. “I heard the news Sanaa and I’m so sorry. I just knew they were going to offer you a spot in their dance company,” she says. “It’s okay. It doesn’t matter anymore because I quit. I’m tired of getting rejected from every company I audition for,” you reply, staring out of the window.
“You can’t be serious. Sanaa you’re an amazing dancer. You have the talent, the drive and the attitude it takes to be great. You just need to be patient. These things take time.” “Time? I’ve tried out for ten dance companies in a year and a half. No one wants me. It’s not going to happen. I’m just going to get a job I hate and be done with it.” “You could do that. Or you could follow your heart and use the talent God gave you. I know for a fact that you’re one of the most talented ballerinas on the planet. You just have to give other people, the right people the time to see it. Don’t give up just because you can’t see success right now. Most of the super successful people in the world had to fight for years to get the right break. Your break is coming. Just don’t give up on yourself or God.”
“You’re still trying to do that?” “You should just quit and do something else.” “That only happens to lucky people.” These are phrases that are constantly told to us by our family, friends, and sometimes ourselves (sometimes we can be our harshest critic). Striving for exceptional goals are encouraged when we are kids, but as we get older, we are told to play it safe. We are taught to go after what we see and not our desires, our calling.
It is essential that we realize God gave each of us beautiful and special gifts that are to be shared with the world not hidden in the closet that is our minds. He wants us to be confident in them and trust that if He gave us the ability to do it, he will provide the opportunity for us to use it. We must answer God’s calling for our lives if we are to be truly happy.
“O Sovereign LORD, you are God! Your words are trustworthy, and you have promised these good things to your servant.” –2 Samuel 7:28
“You can’t be serious. Sanaa you’re an amazing dancer. You have the talent, the drive and the attitude it takes to be great. You just need to be patient. These things take time.” “Time? I’ve tried out for ten dance companies in a year and a half. No one wants me. It’s not going to happen. I’m just going to get a job I hate and be done with it.” “You could do that. Or you could follow your heart and use the talent God gave you. I know for a fact that you’re one of the most talented ballerinas on the planet. You just have to give other people, the right people the time to see it. Don’t give up just because you can’t see success right now. Most of the super successful people in the world had to fight for years to get the right break. Your break is coming. Just don’t give up on yourself or God.”
“You’re still trying to do that?” “You should just quit and do something else.” “That only happens to lucky people.” These are phrases that are constantly told to us by our family, friends, and sometimes ourselves (sometimes we can be our harshest critic). Striving for exceptional goals are encouraged when we are kids, but as we get older, we are told to play it safe. We are taught to go after what we see and not our desires, our calling.
It is essential that we realize God gave each of us beautiful and special gifts that are to be shared with the world not hidden in the closet that is our minds. He wants us to be confident in them and trust that if He gave us the ability to do it, he will provide the opportunity for us to use it. We must answer God’s calling for our lives if we are to be truly happy.
“O Sovereign LORD, you are God! Your words are trustworthy, and you have promised these good things to your servant.” –2 Samuel 7:28
Do You Take Your Family’s Love For Granted?
Your phone rings for the hundredth time. You don’t bother answering because you already know it’s one of the five credit card companies you owe. About five minutes later you leave your apartment to meet your big sisters at a café.
“Hey y’all what’s up,” you say, sitting down at the table with you sisters. “What up? That’s what we want to know. How many times are we going to have to bail you out of debt? When are you going to be responsible and stop spending what you know you don’t have,” Kiera asks. “Look I’m sorry. Why are y’all trippin’? I thought y’all were supposed to have my back.” “We’re supposed to have your back not your bills. You’re 22 years old now and it’s time for you to start acting like it and stop going on vacations with your girls when you know you won’t be able to pay your rent when you get back. And we’re tired of you only calling us when you need something. You don’t even call to check on us to see how we’re doing,” Sarai says. “Yeah and the only time you hang out with us is when we invite you and pay for everything,” Kiera adds. As you listen to your sisters go on and on about how irresponsible and selfish you are, you start to ask yourself, “Am I really that bad?”
“I don’t need to pay her back we’re family.” “He makes a lot of money. He won’t miss it.” “Family should support me whether I’m right or wrong.” These are common phrases and ideologies we use to take advantage of our family’s loyalty and love for us. And the more our loved ones give us, the more we require. Unfortunately we never consider the mental or financial strain we place on them.
It is important that we treasure all of our loved ones. And by doing so, we need to respect their love, time, and money. In order for us to be our best selves, we must have healthy relationships with the people in our lives. We must do our best to love others as God loves us.
“The second is this: 'Love your neighbor as yourself.' There is no commandment greater than these."—Mark 12:31
“Hey y’all what’s up,” you say, sitting down at the table with you sisters. “What up? That’s what we want to know. How many times are we going to have to bail you out of debt? When are you going to be responsible and stop spending what you know you don’t have,” Kiera asks. “Look I’m sorry. Why are y’all trippin’? I thought y’all were supposed to have my back.” “We’re supposed to have your back not your bills. You’re 22 years old now and it’s time for you to start acting like it and stop going on vacations with your girls when you know you won’t be able to pay your rent when you get back. And we’re tired of you only calling us when you need something. You don’t even call to check on us to see how we’re doing,” Sarai says. “Yeah and the only time you hang out with us is when we invite you and pay for everything,” Kiera adds. As you listen to your sisters go on and on about how irresponsible and selfish you are, you start to ask yourself, “Am I really that bad?”
“I don’t need to pay her back we’re family.” “He makes a lot of money. He won’t miss it.” “Family should support me whether I’m right or wrong.” These are common phrases and ideologies we use to take advantage of our family’s loyalty and love for us. And the more our loved ones give us, the more we require. Unfortunately we never consider the mental or financial strain we place on them.
It is important that we treasure all of our loved ones. And by doing so, we need to respect their love, time, and money. In order for us to be our best selves, we must have healthy relationships with the people in our lives. We must do our best to love others as God loves us.
“The second is this: 'Love your neighbor as yourself.' There is no commandment greater than these."—Mark 12:31
Do You Desire Peace Or The World?
Over the past year, you’ve been around the globe like a mad woman traveling to L.A., Chicago, Miami, London and Canada for your job. You’ve missed Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Year’s Day with your family. You also haven’t had a chance to unpack your boxes since you moved into your new house—nine months ago. Today is the first day in five months since you’ve seen your sister.
“Oh my goodness it’s so good to see you Sydney,” your sister yells, giving you a tight hug. “Good to see you too. Come in. Sorry but you’ll have to sit on the floor on a pillow since I haven’t had time to shop for furniture,” you giggle, closing the door. “This is so sad. I mean look at this place. You have no furniture, no nothing. Do you at least have a refrigerator?” “Yes. It just doesn’t have anything in it,” you chuckle, sitting on an over-sized indigo pillow. “It’s not funny Sydney. You have no life. All you do is work. And for what? A big check you never have time to spend. You’re paying a mortgage for a house you can’t enjoy. You have a car that sits in the garage months at a time. You never spend time with the family anymore. You have no friends. I mean, what kind of life is that?”
“Look I don’t have time to worry about all of that right now. All of that is going to have to wait. I’ll never become CFO if I slack off. So what if I have to make a few sacrifices to make it. It’ll be worth it,” you say proudly. “When you make it, are you going to celebrate with the friends you don’t have, the family you’ve abandoned, or this shell of a house? After you accomplish your career goals will you really be happy or will you realize how alone and meaningless your life is?”
We are constantly being told to never be satisfied. If we get $1,000, we start to crave $10,000. And if we get $10,000, then we want $100,000. The more we achieve and are given, the emptier we feel. And as a result, we continue to desire and grab at physical things to fill a spiritual void.
God wants us to desire a positive relationship with Him. If we have that, then our desires will be in accord with His desires for our lives. There is nothing wrong with wanting to accomplish certain goals in life. But there is something wrong if you are looking for that accomplishment to fulfill you. Only God can do that. He wants to give us peace in good and bad times. He wants us to be happy. He wants us to be His.
“Do not love the world or the things in the world. If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him. For all that is in the world—the desires of the flesh and the desires of the eyes and pride in possessions—is not from the Father but is from the world. And the world is passing away along with its desires, but whoever does the will of God abides forever.”—1 John 2:15-17
“Oh my goodness it’s so good to see you Sydney,” your sister yells, giving you a tight hug. “Good to see you too. Come in. Sorry but you’ll have to sit on the floor on a pillow since I haven’t had time to shop for furniture,” you giggle, closing the door. “This is so sad. I mean look at this place. You have no furniture, no nothing. Do you at least have a refrigerator?” “Yes. It just doesn’t have anything in it,” you chuckle, sitting on an over-sized indigo pillow. “It’s not funny Sydney. You have no life. All you do is work. And for what? A big check you never have time to spend. You’re paying a mortgage for a house you can’t enjoy. You have a car that sits in the garage months at a time. You never spend time with the family anymore. You have no friends. I mean, what kind of life is that?”
“Look I don’t have time to worry about all of that right now. All of that is going to have to wait. I’ll never become CFO if I slack off. So what if I have to make a few sacrifices to make it. It’ll be worth it,” you say proudly. “When you make it, are you going to celebrate with the friends you don’t have, the family you’ve abandoned, or this shell of a house? After you accomplish your career goals will you really be happy or will you realize how alone and meaningless your life is?”
We are constantly being told to never be satisfied. If we get $1,000, we start to crave $10,000. And if we get $10,000, then we want $100,000. The more we achieve and are given, the emptier we feel. And as a result, we continue to desire and grab at physical things to fill a spiritual void.
God wants us to desire a positive relationship with Him. If we have that, then our desires will be in accord with His desires for our lives. There is nothing wrong with wanting to accomplish certain goals in life. But there is something wrong if you are looking for that accomplishment to fulfill you. Only God can do that. He wants to give us peace in good and bad times. He wants us to be happy. He wants us to be His.
“Do not love the world or the things in the world. If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him. For all that is in the world—the desires of the flesh and the desires of the eyes and pride in possessions—is not from the Father but is from the world. And the world is passing away along with its desires, but whoever does the will of God abides forever.”—1 John 2:15-17
Why Are You Ashamed Of Your Body?
The holidays are over and you and your friends have decided to take advantage of all the post holiday sales. Your friends raid all the dress and jean racks and head straight to the dressing room. They prance out of the dressing rooms flaunting their future new outfits on their flat stomachs, curvy hips and full breasts. With each outfit they show you, the crack in your spirit grows deeper and deeper.
“Nicki why aren’t you trying on anything? This is the third store we’ve been in and you haven’t bought a thing. I know you’ve got to like something,” Holly says, with one hand on her hip and the other filled with clothes. “I’m just window shopping and watching y’all go crazy in every store,” you smile, hoping she doesn’t see the insecurity on your face. “Well try on this dress. It will look so cute on you,” she says, handing you a cream lace v-neck bandage dress. You reluctantly take the dress and go into the dressing room. As you take off your shirt, your heart begins to thump harder and insecurity lands in your throat almost preventing you from swallowing. Once you put the dress on, you stare at your less than stellar body.
I look awful in this dress. My boobs are too small to fill it out and my stomach makes me look four months pregnant. “Nicki come out. We want to see the dress on you,” Shellie says. You hesitate for a moment. I can’t go out there. I look horrible. Why can’t I have a beautiful body like my friends? Maybe if I workout more my stomach will get smaller and my butt will get bigger. Maybe if I eat more salads I will be beautiful…
The Master cleanse lemonade diet, juicing diet, and no consumption diets are becoming more popular. Liposuction, colonic and fat freezing procedures have replaced healthy workout regimens. We are constantly being brainwashed with the notion that DD breasts, a 22 inch waist and a round butt is perfection. Any body type above or below that is body shamed into insecurity.
It is vital that we appreciate our body the way God created them. He created all of us unique and beautiful regardless of what society says. As God’s children we are to honor our bodies by eating healthy foods (with the occasional junk food splurge) and working out. But we are not supposed to go overboard and starve ourselves or over exercise. God wants us to look in the mirror and see our true selves--FABULOUS FEMALES.
“You are altogether beautiful, my love; there is no flaw in you.”—Song of Solomon 4:7
“Nicki why aren’t you trying on anything? This is the third store we’ve been in and you haven’t bought a thing. I know you’ve got to like something,” Holly says, with one hand on her hip and the other filled with clothes. “I’m just window shopping and watching y’all go crazy in every store,” you smile, hoping she doesn’t see the insecurity on your face. “Well try on this dress. It will look so cute on you,” she says, handing you a cream lace v-neck bandage dress. You reluctantly take the dress and go into the dressing room. As you take off your shirt, your heart begins to thump harder and insecurity lands in your throat almost preventing you from swallowing. Once you put the dress on, you stare at your less than stellar body.
I look awful in this dress. My boobs are too small to fill it out and my stomach makes me look four months pregnant. “Nicki come out. We want to see the dress on you,” Shellie says. You hesitate for a moment. I can’t go out there. I look horrible. Why can’t I have a beautiful body like my friends? Maybe if I workout more my stomach will get smaller and my butt will get bigger. Maybe if I eat more salads I will be beautiful…
The Master cleanse lemonade diet, juicing diet, and no consumption diets are becoming more popular. Liposuction, colonic and fat freezing procedures have replaced healthy workout regimens. We are constantly being brainwashed with the notion that DD breasts, a 22 inch waist and a round butt is perfection. Any body type above or below that is body shamed into insecurity.
It is vital that we appreciate our body the way God created them. He created all of us unique and beautiful regardless of what society says. As God’s children we are to honor our bodies by eating healthy foods (with the occasional junk food splurge) and working out. But we are not supposed to go overboard and starve ourselves or over exercise. God wants us to look in the mirror and see our true selves--FABULOUS FEMALES.
“You are altogether beautiful, my love; there is no flaw in you.”—Song of Solomon 4:7
Are You Going To Bring In The New Year With The Same Flaws?
It’s New Years Eve and your cousin Tamera (also your roommate) rushes in the house with bags of dresses, shoes and accessories. “Can you believe I spent almost four hours in the mall trying to figure out what to buy to wear for the party tonight? I still couldn’t decide so I bought three different dresses. I’m going to try them on and I want you to tell me which one looks the best,” she says, rushing into her room. After the third dress, you tell her to wear the gold multi sequin v-neck shift dress. As she goes back in her room, you curl up on the sofa in a pair of SpongeBob SquarePants pajamas with a bowl of popcorn and a dozen romantic comedy films.
“Why are you in your pj’s? It’s only 5:20 in the evening. Aren’t you going to Sara’s dinner party tonight,” Tamera yells from her room. “No I’m going to sit this one out and stay home and watch some movies.” “Why? You never want to go anywhere lately. What’s going on?” “I just…I just don’t feel up to it. I mean look at me. I’ve gained 25 pounds over the past 8 months, I still don’t have a boyfriend and I still don’t know what I want to do with my life. I have two degrees and no job. Why should I go to a party and celebrate?” “Kaiya you need to stop feeling sorry for yourself. You’ve been acting like this for almost a year and a half now. If you want change, then you have to change. Sitting on the sofa eating a tub of popcorn with extra butter and staring at the TV isn’t going to get you where you want to be. If you want to lose weight, come with me to my yoga and hip-hop dance classes. If you don’t know what kind of career you want to pursue, volunteer for different organizations and see what interests you. And as for a boyfriend, you’ll never get one staying in this house. Do your best to embrace and be what you want and it will come to you. It’s time for you to leave the negative thinking in 2014 and start fresh in 2015.”
At the end of each year, we all make New Year’s resolutions to lose weight, pay off debt, buy a house, get married or have a baby. Tons of gym memberships go unused, bills go unpaid and promises turn to lies. We make promises to ourselves that will never happen because we usually never try to accomplish them. The biggest mistake is that we try to change spiritual flaws with outward actions.
It’s essential that we realize our “small” flaws stem from deeper issues and insecurities. In order to overcome challenges, we must acknowledge the spiritual problems (insecurity, no discipline, fear, anger, jealousy, pain etc.) first. These flaws are the virus we carry with us year after year. They seep into our souls and spread to our minds and bodies. We must turn to God and surrender our flaws to Him and begin the recovery process that will lead us to inner and outer success. God loves us and wants us to defeat our flaws, not let them defeat us. Make 2015 the year you become a spiritual conqueror.
“Finally, be strong in the Lord and in the strength of His might. Put on the whole armor of God that you may be able to stand against the schemes of the devil.” –Ephesians 6:11
“Why are you in your pj’s? It’s only 5:20 in the evening. Aren’t you going to Sara’s dinner party tonight,” Tamera yells from her room. “No I’m going to sit this one out and stay home and watch some movies.” “Why? You never want to go anywhere lately. What’s going on?” “I just…I just don’t feel up to it. I mean look at me. I’ve gained 25 pounds over the past 8 months, I still don’t have a boyfriend and I still don’t know what I want to do with my life. I have two degrees and no job. Why should I go to a party and celebrate?” “Kaiya you need to stop feeling sorry for yourself. You’ve been acting like this for almost a year and a half now. If you want change, then you have to change. Sitting on the sofa eating a tub of popcorn with extra butter and staring at the TV isn’t going to get you where you want to be. If you want to lose weight, come with me to my yoga and hip-hop dance classes. If you don’t know what kind of career you want to pursue, volunteer for different organizations and see what interests you. And as for a boyfriend, you’ll never get one staying in this house. Do your best to embrace and be what you want and it will come to you. It’s time for you to leave the negative thinking in 2014 and start fresh in 2015.”
At the end of each year, we all make New Year’s resolutions to lose weight, pay off debt, buy a house, get married or have a baby. Tons of gym memberships go unused, bills go unpaid and promises turn to lies. We make promises to ourselves that will never happen because we usually never try to accomplish them. The biggest mistake is that we try to change spiritual flaws with outward actions.
It’s essential that we realize our “small” flaws stem from deeper issues and insecurities. In order to overcome challenges, we must acknowledge the spiritual problems (insecurity, no discipline, fear, anger, jealousy, pain etc.) first. These flaws are the virus we carry with us year after year. They seep into our souls and spread to our minds and bodies. We must turn to God and surrender our flaws to Him and begin the recovery process that will lead us to inner and outer success. God loves us and wants us to defeat our flaws, not let them defeat us. Make 2015 the year you become a spiritual conqueror.
“Finally, be strong in the Lord and in the strength of His might. Put on the whole armor of God that you may be able to stand against the schemes of the devil.” –Ephesians 6:11
Is Your Attitude Like A Christmas Angel Or The Grinch?
It’s the day before Christmas Eve and you’re on your way to pick up your twin brother from the airport. “This is so stupid. Why do I have to pick him up from the airport? He should just take a cab,” you say to yourself out loud. As soon as you walk out of your townhouse door, your cell phone rings. “Farrah after you pick Fabian up go to the store and buy me some more celery and onions. I forgot to buy enough,” your mother says. “Okay,” you say dryly, hanging up the phone. A few minutes later you arrive at the airport and Fabian loads his suitcases in the trunk and slides into the passenger seat. “What’s up twin? How you doin’,” he smiles. “Everything would be great if I didn’t have to always come get you from the airport. Why can’t you just get a cab?” “Why take a cab when I have you as my chauffeur,” he jokes.
Once you arrive at your parents’ house, you slam the bag of onions and celery on the kitchen counter. “Hey what’s your problem? Nothing gets slammed around here,” your mom chides you. “Sorry mom I’m just having a bad day. I don’t have all of my presents, I only got a $3,000 Christmas bonus at work, Fabian is being his annoying self and Tristan isn’t going to be here for Christmas because he’s going home to be with his family.” “So that’s what it is. Your boyfriend isn’t going to be here and you’re sad,” she teases. “It’s not just that. He gave me my Christmas present before he left and it was awful. He had the nerve to get me a Citrine and diamond tennis bracelet when I distinctly told him I wanted a Le Vian Chocolate diamond ring with white diamond accents,” you pout, folding your arms. “Sweetie you’re going to have to learn to change your attitude and appreciate your blessings. How many jobs give Christmas bonuses, let alone $3,000 ones? If you don’t have all your presents, just go to the mall and buy them. And you know Fabian has always gotten on your nerves since y’all were kids, so why is that bothering you so much? You know he loves you and has always been there for you. And when it comes to Tristan, you need to thank the Lord for sending you such an amazing gentleman. That boy loves you and you need to see that and stop worrying about what kind of jewelry he bought you. You need to realize that Christmas is more than presents, money and who you’re spending time with. It’s about our savior and how He became a gift to the world.”
Christmas has become a time for overeating, drunkenness, Santa Claus and presents. We have become so engulfed in who can give and receive the best gifts, instead of appreciating that someone thought enough to give us a gift in the first place. Most of us are no longer cheerful and excited about the holidays. We only see it as a time to stress about money and whether or not we have someone to kiss under the mistletoe. It has become so commercialized that many people, including “Christians”, have forgotten why we celebrate Christmas in the first place.
It is vital that we remember the CHRIST in Christmas. We give gifts to each other symbolizing the gift Jesus gave us—eternal life. Our spirits should be overflowing with joy, care, selflessness and servitude like Christ. We should not get caught up in shallow expectations and ideas about the meaning of Christmas. Our attitudes should be filled with happiness and appreciation. Our attitudes should be Christ like. Merry CHRISTmas.
“In everything give thanks; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.”—1 Thessalonians 5:18
Once you arrive at your parents’ house, you slam the bag of onions and celery on the kitchen counter. “Hey what’s your problem? Nothing gets slammed around here,” your mom chides you. “Sorry mom I’m just having a bad day. I don’t have all of my presents, I only got a $3,000 Christmas bonus at work, Fabian is being his annoying self and Tristan isn’t going to be here for Christmas because he’s going home to be with his family.” “So that’s what it is. Your boyfriend isn’t going to be here and you’re sad,” she teases. “It’s not just that. He gave me my Christmas present before he left and it was awful. He had the nerve to get me a Citrine and diamond tennis bracelet when I distinctly told him I wanted a Le Vian Chocolate diamond ring with white diamond accents,” you pout, folding your arms. “Sweetie you’re going to have to learn to change your attitude and appreciate your blessings. How many jobs give Christmas bonuses, let alone $3,000 ones? If you don’t have all your presents, just go to the mall and buy them. And you know Fabian has always gotten on your nerves since y’all were kids, so why is that bothering you so much? You know he loves you and has always been there for you. And when it comes to Tristan, you need to thank the Lord for sending you such an amazing gentleman. That boy loves you and you need to see that and stop worrying about what kind of jewelry he bought you. You need to realize that Christmas is more than presents, money and who you’re spending time with. It’s about our savior and how He became a gift to the world.”
Christmas has become a time for overeating, drunkenness, Santa Claus and presents. We have become so engulfed in who can give and receive the best gifts, instead of appreciating that someone thought enough to give us a gift in the first place. Most of us are no longer cheerful and excited about the holidays. We only see it as a time to stress about money and whether or not we have someone to kiss under the mistletoe. It has become so commercialized that many people, including “Christians”, have forgotten why we celebrate Christmas in the first place.
It is vital that we remember the CHRIST in Christmas. We give gifts to each other symbolizing the gift Jesus gave us—eternal life. Our spirits should be overflowing with joy, care, selflessness and servitude like Christ. We should not get caught up in shallow expectations and ideas about the meaning of Christmas. Our attitudes should be filled with happiness and appreciation. Our attitudes should be Christ like. Merry CHRISTmas.
“In everything give thanks; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.”—1 Thessalonians 5:18
Why Are You Always Ready To Fight?
As everyone around you is enjoying themselves at your cousin’s Christmas party, you remain silent staring at the door. “What are you doing? Why aren’t you talking to anyone and having fun,” your cousin Ashley asks. “Because I’m waiting for Kellie to show up; as soon as I see her it’s on,” you say. “It’s on? What are you talkin’ about?” Before you can answer, Kellie walks through the door. You storm her way, “I hear you been talking about me,” you snap, shoving her into the wall. “Yeah Leslie told me that you said you don’t like me.”
“What is wrong with you,” Ashley screams, grabbing you by the arm and whisking you away to her bedroom. “Are you crazy? What is your problem?” “I’m sorry but she had it coming. She told Tamera that told Aisha that Crystal that told Leslie that told me that she didn’t like me and thought I was crazy.” “Do you hear yourself? Of course she thought you were crazy. Look how you’re carrying on—like a crazy person. You need to get a grip and stop wanting to fight every time someone says something you don’t like. So what if someone doesn’t like you. The important thing is do you like yourself?”
Face slapping, hair pulling and drink throwing has become a regular occurrence on TV shows, YouTube and in reality. The more we scream, curse and punch each other, the more intriguing we become. We are no longer encouraged to discuss issues or dismiss minor conflicts. The solution to conflict has become more conflict. Peace is becoming nonexistent.
It is important for us to realize that conflict and different opinions are a part of life and need to be handled respectfully. As ladies, we should not be so quick to attack someone (especially another lady) when something doesn’t go our way. Possessing self-control and humbleness will allow us to handle any situation with intellect and class. God wants us to trust Him and let Him fight our battles and those that wrong us. He wants us to focus on bettering ourselves and others through love, not our fists. He wants us to be REAL ladies.
“My dear brothers, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, for man's anger does not bring about the righteous life that God desires.”—James 1:19-20
“What is wrong with you,” Ashley screams, grabbing you by the arm and whisking you away to her bedroom. “Are you crazy? What is your problem?” “I’m sorry but she had it coming. She told Tamera that told Aisha that Crystal that told Leslie that told me that she didn’t like me and thought I was crazy.” “Do you hear yourself? Of course she thought you were crazy. Look how you’re carrying on—like a crazy person. You need to get a grip and stop wanting to fight every time someone says something you don’t like. So what if someone doesn’t like you. The important thing is do you like yourself?”
Face slapping, hair pulling and drink throwing has become a regular occurrence on TV shows, YouTube and in reality. The more we scream, curse and punch each other, the more intriguing we become. We are no longer encouraged to discuss issues or dismiss minor conflicts. The solution to conflict has become more conflict. Peace is becoming nonexistent.
It is important for us to realize that conflict and different opinions are a part of life and need to be handled respectfully. As ladies, we should not be so quick to attack someone (especially another lady) when something doesn’t go our way. Possessing self-control and humbleness will allow us to handle any situation with intellect and class. God wants us to trust Him and let Him fight our battles and those that wrong us. He wants us to focus on bettering ourselves and others through love, not our fists. He wants us to be REAL ladies.
“My dear brothers, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, for man's anger does not bring about the righteous life that God desires.”—James 1:19-20
Are You Happy Being Super Fake?
As you put on your third coat of your favorite NARS lipstick, you glance at the stack of bills for the Mercedes S550 Sedan you’re leasing (and telling everybody you own), your posh condo final rent notice (you tell everyone you bought last year), and tons of overdue credit card bills you will never pay off. You shake your head and continue primping to meet up with your latest shallow BFF. You assess yourself one last time in the mirror and fling your $2000 extensions over your shoulder and head out the door.
Once you arrive at one of the most expensive restaurants in the city, you and your bestie Kami dive into your usual shallow conversation. “So what did you think about what Kerrie wore last night at the premiere party? Talk about so last season,” Kami giggles. “I know right. And did you see those old Manolos? I think those came out five years ago,” you laugh, sipping on your Sangria. “Speaking of so last season did you hear about Lexi losing her job and getting her Jag repossessed? Now she is driving a 2009 Nissan Altima. Talk about living the highlife—not,” Kami jokes. You laugh with her, but inside you know that you’re a check away from losing your “perfect” lifestyle as well. You know your life is in shambles and you’re living a lie so why do you keep faking it?
False eyelashes, lip injections, breast and butt implants now trump pure authenticity. Our social significance is based on what outfit we party in and who you party with at the hottest events. We are no longer encouraged to be the best version of ourselves, but the best “Rihanna”, “Kim K”, or “Beyonce”. Becoming clones of spiritually starved people has become a must, while our unique greatness fades into the world of what was or could have been.
It’s vital that we recognize our strengths and talents as something special and necessary in order to become the ladies God has destined us to be. Expensive cars, houses and clothes can’t add value or happiness to our lives. Accepting our authentic selves and situations will allow us to have true relationships with real (not superficial) people. We will also be able to recognize our blessings and cherish them. Being fake never pays off. You are beautiful the way God created you. Be blessed.
“But the Lord said to Samuel, ‘Do not look on his appearance or on the height of his stature, because I have rejected him. For the Lord sees not as man sees: man looks on the outward appearance, but the Lord looks on the heart.”—1 Samuel 16:7
Once you arrive at one of the most expensive restaurants in the city, you and your bestie Kami dive into your usual shallow conversation. “So what did you think about what Kerrie wore last night at the premiere party? Talk about so last season,” Kami giggles. “I know right. And did you see those old Manolos? I think those came out five years ago,” you laugh, sipping on your Sangria. “Speaking of so last season did you hear about Lexi losing her job and getting her Jag repossessed? Now she is driving a 2009 Nissan Altima. Talk about living the highlife—not,” Kami jokes. You laugh with her, but inside you know that you’re a check away from losing your “perfect” lifestyle as well. You know your life is in shambles and you’re living a lie so why do you keep faking it?
False eyelashes, lip injections, breast and butt implants now trump pure authenticity. Our social significance is based on what outfit we party in and who you party with at the hottest events. We are no longer encouraged to be the best version of ourselves, but the best “Rihanna”, “Kim K”, or “Beyonce”. Becoming clones of spiritually starved people has become a must, while our unique greatness fades into the world of what was or could have been.
It’s vital that we recognize our strengths and talents as something special and necessary in order to become the ladies God has destined us to be. Expensive cars, houses and clothes can’t add value or happiness to our lives. Accepting our authentic selves and situations will allow us to have true relationships with real (not superficial) people. We will also be able to recognize our blessings and cherish them. Being fake never pays off. You are beautiful the way God created you. Be blessed.
“But the Lord said to Samuel, ‘Do not look on his appearance or on the height of his stature, because I have rejected him. For the Lord sees not as man sees: man looks on the outward appearance, but the Lord looks on the heart.”—1 Samuel 16:7
Is Insecurity Killing Your Dreams?
“I didn’t sleep with that girl!!! I don’t even know her,” your boyfriend protests, following you into your house. “I saw you smiling and talking to her by the pool. What, were you two talking about when y’all were gonna hookup again,” you scream, getting in his face. “I knew you were low down just like all the others. Go ahead. If you want her, be with her.” “What is wrong with you? I told you I just met her today like you did. Fabian introduced me to her five minutes after you met her. I don’t want her. I want you. You need to trust me.” “Well I don’t so get out!!!” “Okay fine, but you need to get yourself together and stop being so insecure.”
As soon as your boyfriend leaves, you reflect on his last words to you, “Stop being so insecure.” It was the same thing your co-worker told you last week when she got a promotion and you didn’t. “Why are you so upset? You said you didn’t want the position because it would be too much work. If you really wanted the job you should have gone after it like I did. Stop being so insecure,” she said. As you continue to reflect, you think about all of things you want to have in life, including a healthy relationship with your boyfriend. “I know he loves me but I can’t help but think he will leave me one day for someone prettier, sexier and smarter than me,” you whisper to yourself. “Maybe I am insecure. Maybe I am jealous of other people’s success. Maybe I don’t feel I deserve to make my dreams come true. But how do I change?”
Insecurity is running rampant in our society. We are constantly told that we need to look like this, sound like that, drive this car, buy those shoes. We are no longer encouraged to be individuals, but walking clichés with no character. This ideology has caused many of us to lose confidence and hate ourselves, as well as others if we can’t live up to these delusional expectations.
It is vital that we realize insecurity comes from Satan not God. Satan wants us to be angry, unhappy and scared to be our best selves. God wants us to fulfill our positive destinies fearlessly. He wants us to be secure in our character, talent and faith. He wants us to have high standards for our lives and appreciate other people’s success. God wants us to be FAITHFUL AND FABULOUS FEMALES.
“Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things. What you have learned and received and heard and seen in me—practice these things, and the God of peace will be with you.” –Philippians 4:8-9
As soon as your boyfriend leaves, you reflect on his last words to you, “Stop being so insecure.” It was the same thing your co-worker told you last week when she got a promotion and you didn’t. “Why are you so upset? You said you didn’t want the position because it would be too much work. If you really wanted the job you should have gone after it like I did. Stop being so insecure,” she said. As you continue to reflect, you think about all of things you want to have in life, including a healthy relationship with your boyfriend. “I know he loves me but I can’t help but think he will leave me one day for someone prettier, sexier and smarter than me,” you whisper to yourself. “Maybe I am insecure. Maybe I am jealous of other people’s success. Maybe I don’t feel I deserve to make my dreams come true. But how do I change?”
Insecurity is running rampant in our society. We are constantly told that we need to look like this, sound like that, drive this car, buy those shoes. We are no longer encouraged to be individuals, but walking clichés with no character. This ideology has caused many of us to lose confidence and hate ourselves, as well as others if we can’t live up to these delusional expectations.
It is vital that we realize insecurity comes from Satan not God. Satan wants us to be angry, unhappy and scared to be our best selves. God wants us to fulfill our positive destinies fearlessly. He wants us to be secure in our character, talent and faith. He wants us to have high standards for our lives and appreciate other people’s success. God wants us to be FAITHFUL AND FABULOUS FEMALES.
“Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things. What you have learned and received and heard and seen in me—practice these things, and the God of peace will be with you.” –Philippians 4:8-9
Can You Recognize A Real Gentleman?
Tonight you’re super excited because you’re going on a date with a guy you’ve had a crush on for months. Your doorbell rings and it’s him. You open the door and he greets you with a smile and a single rose. You say thank you with a surprised look on your face because no one has ever given you flowers or roses before. As soon as you walk to his car, he opens the door for you and lets you in. Once he pulls off, he asks you if the temperature in the car is okay and if you like the music that is playing. You look at him and say yes.
When you arrive at the restaurant, he immediately rushes to the passenger side of the car to open the door for you. “You didn’t have to do that. I can open the door for myself,” you say. “Oh yes I did. A man should always open the door for a lady,” he smiles. Inside the restaurant he tells you to order anything you want. You order a martini and he orders a coke. You ask him why he didn’t order any alcohol and he tells you he doesn’t drink. You smile and say okay, but you’re really thinking that he must be lame. After dinner and dessert, he asks you if you would like to go to a poetry club or an art exhibit. You look at him real funny and start laughing, “You’ve got to be kidding. Why don’t we go to a club instead?” “Clubs aren’t my thing. I’m more of an artistic kinda guy. I like going to different festivals, museums, art galleries and jazz and local music lounges.” As he’s telling you this, you’re trying to think of ways you can loosen him up.
When you arrive back at your house, you invite him in (and purposely let your hand graze his package) but he declines. “Thanks but I think its best that I go. I had a lot of fun. I’ll call you tomorrow and see what time you want to go to the movies.” As he walks to his car, you tell yourself that was your first and last date with him because he is too boring. “What kinda of guy doesn’t drink, go clubbin’ or want to have sex on the first date?”
“All men are dogs.” “A man is going to be a man.” “Men have needs.” These are terms most of us have grown to believe and accept as the absolute reality of all men. We are taught that it’s impossible for a man to totally respect himself and the women around him. We are taught that chivalry died a hundred years ago and foul behavior is king and we should be his vile servant. The world paints many pictures of masculinity accept the reality that gentlemen do exist.
It’s important for us to realize that gentlemen exist and they desire to be with LADIES. They respect themselves and the value of courtship and marriage. They’re not looking for a girl that is reckless with her mind, body and spirit. They want a LADY that values and protects herself from negativity. God wants us to recognize our worth and not feed into the delusions of the world. He wants us to allow Him to bless us with a gentleman. And once we get that gentleman, we need to treasure him. We need to recognize that he is a real GENTLEMAN. A man that wants to do nothing but love, provide and protect us unconditionally.
“How can a young man keep his way pure? By guarding it according to your word. With my whole heart I seek you; let me not wander from your commandments!”—Psalms 119:9-10
When you arrive at the restaurant, he immediately rushes to the passenger side of the car to open the door for you. “You didn’t have to do that. I can open the door for myself,” you say. “Oh yes I did. A man should always open the door for a lady,” he smiles. Inside the restaurant he tells you to order anything you want. You order a martini and he orders a coke. You ask him why he didn’t order any alcohol and he tells you he doesn’t drink. You smile and say okay, but you’re really thinking that he must be lame. After dinner and dessert, he asks you if you would like to go to a poetry club or an art exhibit. You look at him real funny and start laughing, “You’ve got to be kidding. Why don’t we go to a club instead?” “Clubs aren’t my thing. I’m more of an artistic kinda guy. I like going to different festivals, museums, art galleries and jazz and local music lounges.” As he’s telling you this, you’re trying to think of ways you can loosen him up.
When you arrive back at your house, you invite him in (and purposely let your hand graze his package) but he declines. “Thanks but I think its best that I go. I had a lot of fun. I’ll call you tomorrow and see what time you want to go to the movies.” As he walks to his car, you tell yourself that was your first and last date with him because he is too boring. “What kinda of guy doesn’t drink, go clubbin’ or want to have sex on the first date?”
“All men are dogs.” “A man is going to be a man.” “Men have needs.” These are terms most of us have grown to believe and accept as the absolute reality of all men. We are taught that it’s impossible for a man to totally respect himself and the women around him. We are taught that chivalry died a hundred years ago and foul behavior is king and we should be his vile servant. The world paints many pictures of masculinity accept the reality that gentlemen do exist.
It’s important for us to realize that gentlemen exist and they desire to be with LADIES. They respect themselves and the value of courtship and marriage. They’re not looking for a girl that is reckless with her mind, body and spirit. They want a LADY that values and protects herself from negativity. God wants us to recognize our worth and not feed into the delusions of the world. He wants us to allow Him to bless us with a gentleman. And once we get that gentleman, we need to treasure him. We need to recognize that he is a real GENTLEMAN. A man that wants to do nothing but love, provide and protect us unconditionally.
“How can a young man keep his way pure? By guarding it according to your word. With my whole heart I seek you; let me not wander from your commandments!”—Psalms 119:9-10
Is Suicide Your Only Way Out?
This week is one of the worst weeks of your life. Not only is your ex-boyfriend (you broke up with him because he cheated on you two months ago) now engaged to his co-worker (who he cheated on you with), but now you’ve just been laid off from your job. “Sorry Camren you’re an amazing advertising executive, but we’ve decided to down-size the company,” your boss says as your heart has now jumped out of your chest and onto the floor. “What am I going to do,” you whisper to yourself.
As you drive home, your mind is racing because you just bought a new house ten months ago. “How am I going to pay for my house, my car, my student loans?” Your ringing cell phone breaks your frantic conversation with yourself. You answer your phone and it’s your OBGYN’s office. The nurse tells you that your tests came back abnormal and they would like you to come in as soon as possible for further testing. As you pull into your garage, you lower its door and keep your car running. You feel your spirit cracking and your peace of mind waving goodbye. You close your eyes and lay your head against the headrest. This year has been traumatic with the loss of your only family, your mother and sister in a car accident. Now the rest of your life is falling apart. “Why am I still here? I can’t do this anymore.” With your eyes still closed, you put your hand on your keys debating whether to turn the car off or continue to let poisonous gloom fill your car and lungs. “Maybe death will be kinder to me…”
Successful careers, relationships, great looks and respect are things most of us strive for in life. We submerge our lives and thoughts with ways to accomplish everything as quick and painless as possible. Unfortunately life doesn’t work that way or play fair. We will all experience pain and defeat. And when we do, the world teaches us that a glass of wine or a shot of vodka will make everything go away. We are told that if we want to get over a man, we need to get under a new one. We are taught to make reckless decisions to numb pain that physical acts can’t cure. And once some of us realize that, we reach for the gun, pills, knife or sit in a closed in garage to end it all.
The world fails to inform us that we can’t escape ourselves. We are spiritually immortal beings and killing ourselves won’t end it all. It will create a new beginning, one of continuous torment. The world tells us to reach for pleasure and pretend pain is something that Tylenol can fix. Nothing can cure spiritual pain but the Holy Spirit. He can give you peace in the mist of chaos and create success out of your trials. Sometimes God takes away things and people in order to mold us into better beings that are capable of spreading His message and receiving His blessings with grace and humbleness. So whenever you feel like you’re drowning in the sea of life, reach for the Lord and He will be your life preserver.
“When the righteous cry for help, the Lord hears and delivers them out of all their troubles. The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit. Many are the afflictions of the righteous, but the Lord delivers him out of them all. He keeps all his bones; not one of them is broken.” –Psalms 34:17-20
As you drive home, your mind is racing because you just bought a new house ten months ago. “How am I going to pay for my house, my car, my student loans?” Your ringing cell phone breaks your frantic conversation with yourself. You answer your phone and it’s your OBGYN’s office. The nurse tells you that your tests came back abnormal and they would like you to come in as soon as possible for further testing. As you pull into your garage, you lower its door and keep your car running. You feel your spirit cracking and your peace of mind waving goodbye. You close your eyes and lay your head against the headrest. This year has been traumatic with the loss of your only family, your mother and sister in a car accident. Now the rest of your life is falling apart. “Why am I still here? I can’t do this anymore.” With your eyes still closed, you put your hand on your keys debating whether to turn the car off or continue to let poisonous gloom fill your car and lungs. “Maybe death will be kinder to me…”
Successful careers, relationships, great looks and respect are things most of us strive for in life. We submerge our lives and thoughts with ways to accomplish everything as quick and painless as possible. Unfortunately life doesn’t work that way or play fair. We will all experience pain and defeat. And when we do, the world teaches us that a glass of wine or a shot of vodka will make everything go away. We are told that if we want to get over a man, we need to get under a new one. We are taught to make reckless decisions to numb pain that physical acts can’t cure. And once some of us realize that, we reach for the gun, pills, knife or sit in a closed in garage to end it all.
The world fails to inform us that we can’t escape ourselves. We are spiritually immortal beings and killing ourselves won’t end it all. It will create a new beginning, one of continuous torment. The world tells us to reach for pleasure and pretend pain is something that Tylenol can fix. Nothing can cure spiritual pain but the Holy Spirit. He can give you peace in the mist of chaos and create success out of your trials. Sometimes God takes away things and people in order to mold us into better beings that are capable of spreading His message and receiving His blessings with grace and humbleness. So whenever you feel like you’re drowning in the sea of life, reach for the Lord and He will be your life preserver.
“When the righteous cry for help, the Lord hears and delivers them out of all their troubles. The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit. Many are the afflictions of the righteous, but the Lord delivers him out of them all. He keeps all his bones; not one of them is broken.” –Psalms 34:17-20
Why Are You In So Many Parasitic Relationships?
It’s 8:30 on a Monday morning and your phone has been going off like crazy for the past two hours with texts and phone calls from family members and friends asking you for favors. While you’re sitting in interstate traffic, your cousin calls you again and asks if she can “borrow” five hundred dollars because she is running short this month. “I gave you three hundred dollars three months ago and you still haven’t paid me back,” you say. She tells you that she’s sorry and promises to pay you back as soon as she gets paid next week. After a few seconds of contemplating, you agree to give her the money.
As soon as you arrive at work, one of your co-workers asks you to work for her the second Saturday in a row because she and her girlfriends decided (last minute) to go out of town and have a girls’ weekend. “But I worked for you last week. I already made plans of my own,” you say. She reminds you that she covered for you when your mother was sick TWO YEARS AGO. Reluctantly you say yes. And to top it all off, your boyfriend calls you during your lunch break and tells you that he volunteered you to cook gumbo tonight for a dinner party at his boss’ house. “But I don’t get off until six and the party is at eight. Plus I don’t have any of the ingredients at home.” He tells you that you have to figure out a way to make it work because his promotion could depend on it. You sigh and say you’ll see what you can do. As you hang up the phone, you close your eyes and exhale in disgust. You’re overwhelmed by most of the people in your life, but you can’t seem to let them go.
At some point in life we all find ourselves in relationships with people that are very unhealthy for our spirits. Sometimes they come in the form of a parent, sibling, cousin, friend or significant other. But no matter your relation to them, it’s important to remember that there is a distinct difference between being nice and helpful and being used. Some people stay in our lives to suck the life (and opportunities) out of us without ever being grateful or caring about our feelings. They don’t see our kindness as beautiful; they see it as weakness and an opportunity to use us.
It is imperative that we remember that God created relationships to enhance not hinder our lives. A real relationship consists of individuals benefiting from each other mentally, physically and spiritually. In a REAL relationship, we are supposed to be able to rely on each other’s honesty and loyalty through everything, not just when it’s convenient. Realize that you deserve to be around people that genuinely care about you. Not people that are only interested in being a parasite in your life.
“For people will be lovers of self, lovers of money, proud, arrogant, abusive, disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, unholy…having the appearance of godliness, but denying its power. Avoid such people.”—2 Timothy 3:2,5
As soon as you arrive at work, one of your co-workers asks you to work for her the second Saturday in a row because she and her girlfriends decided (last minute) to go out of town and have a girls’ weekend. “But I worked for you last week. I already made plans of my own,” you say. She reminds you that she covered for you when your mother was sick TWO YEARS AGO. Reluctantly you say yes. And to top it all off, your boyfriend calls you during your lunch break and tells you that he volunteered you to cook gumbo tonight for a dinner party at his boss’ house. “But I don’t get off until six and the party is at eight. Plus I don’t have any of the ingredients at home.” He tells you that you have to figure out a way to make it work because his promotion could depend on it. You sigh and say you’ll see what you can do. As you hang up the phone, you close your eyes and exhale in disgust. You’re overwhelmed by most of the people in your life, but you can’t seem to let them go.
At some point in life we all find ourselves in relationships with people that are very unhealthy for our spirits. Sometimes they come in the form of a parent, sibling, cousin, friend or significant other. But no matter your relation to them, it’s important to remember that there is a distinct difference between being nice and helpful and being used. Some people stay in our lives to suck the life (and opportunities) out of us without ever being grateful or caring about our feelings. They don’t see our kindness as beautiful; they see it as weakness and an opportunity to use us.
It is imperative that we remember that God created relationships to enhance not hinder our lives. A real relationship consists of individuals benefiting from each other mentally, physically and spiritually. In a REAL relationship, we are supposed to be able to rely on each other’s honesty and loyalty through everything, not just when it’s convenient. Realize that you deserve to be around people that genuinely care about you. Not people that are only interested in being a parasite in your life.
“For people will be lovers of self, lovers of money, proud, arrogant, abusive, disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, unholy…having the appearance of godliness, but denying its power. Avoid such people.”—2 Timothy 3:2,5
Do You Deserve To Be His Wife Or His Perpetual Girlfriend?
It’s been four years since you and your boyfriend became an official couple. Your relationship is great. He’s always buying you presents, taking you places and supporting your career. On your 35th birthday, he takes you out to a five-star restaurant, a horse and carriage ride and ends the evening with a walk on the riverfront. He stops and tells you he has something to ask you. Immediately your heart does cartwheels and your mind starts guessing what kind of ring he is about to put on your left ring finger, because after four years of dating you just know he’s about to propose. He grabs your hand and says, “Baby I love you and I think we should take this relationship to the next level. Will you move in with me?”
It takes you a minute to realize that he didn’t pull out a ring and ask you to be his wife. Before you respond, your mind starts swirling with thoughts of your mother telling you that living together is wrong and that if a man REALLY loves you he will want you to be his wife not perpetual girlfriend. After a minute or two of contemplating your answer, you respond. “Sean I really love you, but I don’t want to move in with you unless we get married.” His facial expression shows disappointment. He tells you that he’s not ready for marriage and that he doesn’t think marriage is for him. A lump forms in your throat but you manage to tell him that after four years of being together, you think y’all should call it quits because you would like to be married someday. Fast forward five months later you find out that Sean is engaged to a woman he’s only known for four months. Once you hear this, you realize that it’s not that he didn’t want to get married he just didn’t want to marry you.
Year after year females young and old remain in relationships that will NEVER be healthy or lead to marriage. Most of us are taught that having a man (even if he’s a loser) is worth more than gold, silver, diamonds and oil put together. We are taught that having standards for a mate makes us “high maintenance” and a “snob”. We are taught that having a "space filler" should be our number one priority, not our happiness. We are taught that we shouldn’t require marriage if it’s going to run a man out of our lives.
It’s important for us to realize that we should expect a man that claims to love us to want to commit to us. If a man tells you he doesn’t want to get married or isn’t ready for marriage and you’ve been dating for 500 years, drop him if you want to be a wife. What he’s really saying is that he doesn’t want to marry you because someone better might come along. Realize that you deserve true happiness and respect from a man. You deserve to be Mrs. so and so. You deserve to be the wife of a gentleman, not the perpetual girlfriend of a boy.
“He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives favor from the Lord.” –Proverbs 18:22
It takes you a minute to realize that he didn’t pull out a ring and ask you to be his wife. Before you respond, your mind starts swirling with thoughts of your mother telling you that living together is wrong and that if a man REALLY loves you he will want you to be his wife not perpetual girlfriend. After a minute or two of contemplating your answer, you respond. “Sean I really love you, but I don’t want to move in with you unless we get married.” His facial expression shows disappointment. He tells you that he’s not ready for marriage and that he doesn’t think marriage is for him. A lump forms in your throat but you manage to tell him that after four years of being together, you think y’all should call it quits because you would like to be married someday. Fast forward five months later you find out that Sean is engaged to a woman he’s only known for four months. Once you hear this, you realize that it’s not that he didn’t want to get married he just didn’t want to marry you.
Year after year females young and old remain in relationships that will NEVER be healthy or lead to marriage. Most of us are taught that having a man (even if he’s a loser) is worth more than gold, silver, diamonds and oil put together. We are taught that having standards for a mate makes us “high maintenance” and a “snob”. We are taught that having a "space filler" should be our number one priority, not our happiness. We are taught that we shouldn’t require marriage if it’s going to run a man out of our lives.
It’s important for us to realize that we should expect a man that claims to love us to want to commit to us. If a man tells you he doesn’t want to get married or isn’t ready for marriage and you’ve been dating for 500 years, drop him if you want to be a wife. What he’s really saying is that he doesn’t want to marry you because someone better might come along. Realize that you deserve true happiness and respect from a man. You deserve to be Mrs. so and so. You deserve to be the wife of a gentleman, not the perpetual girlfriend of a boy.
“He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives favor from the Lord.” –Proverbs 18:22
Do You Have The Guts To Stand Up For What’s Right?
It’s Monday morning and you arrive late to your job (like you do everyday). As soon as you get there, your boss tells you that she’s going to promote you to sales lead. “But I’ve only been working here for three months and I’m not sure I’m qualified,” you say. “Doesn’t matter I just want to make sure Katy doesn’t get the promotion. I can’t stand her. She thinks she’s so pretty and knows everything.”
Now you know that Katy has been working at the boutique for two years, never missed a day of work and is always on time. She loves her job and knows everything about the boutique and has a beautiful personality. The only reason your boss hates her is because a guy she likes is now dating Katy. You know she should definitely get the promotion instead of you, but if you take the job it would be a big pay raise including fulltime benefits. Before you accept the job, you ask your boss if can think about it.
Most of us are familiar with not only how hard it is to find a job, but a well paying job with benefits in this economy. So when a better job or promotion presents itself we should jump at it right? We are taught that we should do whatever it takes to move up the latter, but does that include undermining everyone around us? Should we allow others to push us to do things we’re not comfortable with just so we won’t rock the boat?
It is important for us to know that we have the right to excel and have a good time, but not at the expense of hurting others. As females we always need to make sure we have the right motives behind our actions. Sometimes we go after or block opportunities or relationships from other females because we are insecure, jealous or we feel pressure from others. It is imperative that we remain confident in what’s right instead of our desires or other people’s expectations. We should always be prepared to stand up for right even if that means we are scared or have to stand alone. Even if we lose popularity or friends in the process, in the end, right ALWAYS wins. God wants us to trust that no matter what, He will stand with us and protect us when we fight for what’s right. REAL LADIES are on the right side, not the shady side.
“So whoever knows the right thing to do and fails to do it, for him it is sin.”-James 4:17
Now you know that Katy has been working at the boutique for two years, never missed a day of work and is always on time. She loves her job and knows everything about the boutique and has a beautiful personality. The only reason your boss hates her is because a guy she likes is now dating Katy. You know she should definitely get the promotion instead of you, but if you take the job it would be a big pay raise including fulltime benefits. Before you accept the job, you ask your boss if can think about it.
Most of us are familiar with not only how hard it is to find a job, but a well paying job with benefits in this economy. So when a better job or promotion presents itself we should jump at it right? We are taught that we should do whatever it takes to move up the latter, but does that include undermining everyone around us? Should we allow others to push us to do things we’re not comfortable with just so we won’t rock the boat?
It is important for us to know that we have the right to excel and have a good time, but not at the expense of hurting others. As females we always need to make sure we have the right motives behind our actions. Sometimes we go after or block opportunities or relationships from other females because we are insecure, jealous or we feel pressure from others. It is imperative that we remain confident in what’s right instead of our desires or other people’s expectations. We should always be prepared to stand up for right even if that means we are scared or have to stand alone. Even if we lose popularity or friends in the process, in the end, right ALWAYS wins. God wants us to trust that no matter what, He will stand with us and protect us when we fight for what’s right. REAL LADIES are on the right side, not the shady side.
“So whoever knows the right thing to do and fails to do it, for him it is sin.”-James 4:17
Do You Know The Difference Between A Lady And A Girl?
It’s 2:30 in the morning when you burst into the apartment you share with your best friend. You come in cursing and yelling at your own thoughts so loud you wake her up. When she walks into the living room, you tell her that you got into a bar fight with your “sex buddy” because you found out he had a girlfriend. “His girlfriend had the nerve to get in my face so I had to slap her down.” You continue your tirade of why you’re now banned from the bar and how you didn’t like him anyway because the sex wasn’t that good.
After 20 minutes, your friend finally tells you that you need to stop acting like a little girl and start acting like a lady. “You’re 33 years old and you need to get it together. All of this reckless partying and meaningless sex needs to stop. It’s time for you to start acting like a lady.” Her response to your rant catches you off guard. You never thought about how your best friend viewed you. You never thought that she felt you were acting like a child instead of an adult.
Sometimes as females our minds are consumed with warped ideas of what is it to be a “woman” at a very young age. Television and music tell us that when we turn 18 we are supposed to party and go clubbing every weekend. We are told that loveless sex and drunken blackouts are a right of passage. We are taught that we should make as many mistakes as we see fit. Very rarely do we see images of what it is to be a lady.
Being a lady has become so rare that when one is spotted, people are amazed and hardly know how to absorb our presence. It’s important that we realize the party life is not going to lead us to a life of total fulfillment. Serial partying year after year usually sends a message to the world that you are unhappy and empty. It tells GENTLEMEN to pass you up because you’re not wife material.
As females, it’s important to remember that our reputations are precious and fragile. Once they become broken, it’s hard to put them back together the way they were before. It’s imperative that we know that being careless doesn’t make us grown, wisdom does. God wants us to be LADIES revered by all that cross our paths. So the next time you decide to play a game of who can drink the most shots in ten minutes, ask yourself if you’re a girl or a LADY.
“The wisest of women builds her house but folly with her own hands tears it down.” –Proverbs 14:1
After 20 minutes, your friend finally tells you that you need to stop acting like a little girl and start acting like a lady. “You’re 33 years old and you need to get it together. All of this reckless partying and meaningless sex needs to stop. It’s time for you to start acting like a lady.” Her response to your rant catches you off guard. You never thought about how your best friend viewed you. You never thought that she felt you were acting like a child instead of an adult.
Sometimes as females our minds are consumed with warped ideas of what is it to be a “woman” at a very young age. Television and music tell us that when we turn 18 we are supposed to party and go clubbing every weekend. We are told that loveless sex and drunken blackouts are a right of passage. We are taught that we should make as many mistakes as we see fit. Very rarely do we see images of what it is to be a lady.
Being a lady has become so rare that when one is spotted, people are amazed and hardly know how to absorb our presence. It’s important that we realize the party life is not going to lead us to a life of total fulfillment. Serial partying year after year usually sends a message to the world that you are unhappy and empty. It tells GENTLEMEN to pass you up because you’re not wife material.
As females, it’s important to remember that our reputations are precious and fragile. Once they become broken, it’s hard to put them back together the way they were before. It’s imperative that we know that being careless doesn’t make us grown, wisdom does. God wants us to be LADIES revered by all that cross our paths. So the next time you decide to play a game of who can drink the most shots in ten minutes, ask yourself if you’re a girl or a LADY.
“The wisest of women builds her house but folly with her own hands tears it down.” –Proverbs 14:1
Are You Happy Being His Punching Bag?
It’s a hot, humid Friday night and the moon is full and the stars are bright. The party at your friend’s house is filled with laughter and smiles from everyone in attendance, especially you. You and your childhood friends sit around the pool joking and telling crazy stories. One of your guy friends puts his arm around you and starts teasing you about the time the two of you used to like each other in the first grade. Everyone starts laughing except for you because you see that your boyfriend has arrived. Your breath escapes you and your stomach tightens when you notice that familiar glare in his eyes.
He comes over and greets everyone with a deceitful smile. After a few minutes of senseless chatting, he tells everyone that y’all have to leave. He gently takes you by the hand and acts like the perfect gentleman his is not. Once you get in the car, you immediately start explaining why your friend had his arm around you. “We were just joking around,” you say. You explain until you run out of words while he remains silent. As soon as he pulls into his driveway, he tells you to get out of the car. As soon as you enter the house, you feel a powerful punch to the eye that makes you lose your balance and you hit your head against the wall. Before you can gather your thoughts about what’s happening, you experience a kick to the stomach that cracks a few ribs. The pain is so bad you can’t speak or fight back. All you can do is pray that he kills you this time so you won’t have to go through this again. But no such luck. He stops and tells you that you made him hurt you and that he’s sorry. He helps you up and kisses your bloody face and says he loves you and will never do it again. You know he’s going to do this again so why don’t you break things off?
As females we are taught that a man is suppose to be strong. He’s supposed to be the provider, the protector and the leader. We’re taught to support him when things get tough. But what do we do if he decides that he wants to use us as his punching bag?
Many of us aren’t taught that we are smart, beautiful and amazing without a man in our lives. We aren’t told that we can lead full, satisfying lives without “a man”. We aren’t told that we should not settle for an insecure, codependent male that bashes our head in every time the thinks we are stepping out on him. We aren’t taught that this type of relationship can lead to physical, mental and spiritual death.
It is important that we remember that God created us to be in relationships that enhance our spirits, not annihilate them. He wants us to be happy and secure about ourselves and the GENTLEMEN He puts in our lives. God wants us to live a life of laughter, not tears. So if you are in a relationship with a guy that is mentally or physically abusing you know that you don’t deserve to be someone’s punching bag. You deserve joy.
"Do not make friends with a hot-tempered person, do not associate with one easily angered." -Proverbs 22:24
He comes over and greets everyone with a deceitful smile. After a few minutes of senseless chatting, he tells everyone that y’all have to leave. He gently takes you by the hand and acts like the perfect gentleman his is not. Once you get in the car, you immediately start explaining why your friend had his arm around you. “We were just joking around,” you say. You explain until you run out of words while he remains silent. As soon as he pulls into his driveway, he tells you to get out of the car. As soon as you enter the house, you feel a powerful punch to the eye that makes you lose your balance and you hit your head against the wall. Before you can gather your thoughts about what’s happening, you experience a kick to the stomach that cracks a few ribs. The pain is so bad you can’t speak or fight back. All you can do is pray that he kills you this time so you won’t have to go through this again. But no such luck. He stops and tells you that you made him hurt you and that he’s sorry. He helps you up and kisses your bloody face and says he loves you and will never do it again. You know he’s going to do this again so why don’t you break things off?
As females we are taught that a man is suppose to be strong. He’s supposed to be the provider, the protector and the leader. We’re taught to support him when things get tough. But what do we do if he decides that he wants to use us as his punching bag?
Many of us aren’t taught that we are smart, beautiful and amazing without a man in our lives. We aren’t told that we can lead full, satisfying lives without “a man”. We aren’t told that we should not settle for an insecure, codependent male that bashes our head in every time the thinks we are stepping out on him. We aren’t taught that this type of relationship can lead to physical, mental and spiritual death.
It is important that we remember that God created us to be in relationships that enhance our spirits, not annihilate them. He wants us to be happy and secure about ourselves and the GENTLEMEN He puts in our lives. God wants us to live a life of laughter, not tears. So if you are in a relationship with a guy that is mentally or physically abusing you know that you don’t deserve to be someone’s punching bag. You deserve joy.
"Do not make friends with a hot-tempered person, do not associate with one easily angered." -Proverbs 22:24
Do Real Ladies Have Booty Calls?
It’s 11 at night and your cell phone vibrates. You have a text message from a guy you like (he only contacts you late at night when he’s “bored”). The text reads: Hey what’s up? Are you sleep? Can I come over? After you read the text, you ask yourself if you should respond. I mean you already know how it’s going to play out. You’ll tell him to come over. An hour later he’s at your house feeling all over you telling you how sexy you are. You’ll fall for it and let him do his thing. About thirty minutes later, he’s shoving his shirt back in his pants headed for the door without a goodbye. So why are you still tempted to say yes?
As a female, young or old, you need to ask yourself if you’re a lady…a lady in Christ. If the answer is yes, you should realize how precious your body and spirit is. You see the body and spirit are connected. If you nurture one, you nurture the other. If you pollute one, you pollute the other. It’s important to protect both from harm that can last a lifetime. Some choices we make can chip away at our spirit. And if we continue to do them, one day we won’t have anything left.
As females, it’s natural for us to yearn for a guy’s attention and acceptance. But we should also be aware that promiscuity is not the way to get it. A guy will NEVER like or love you because of sex. In fact, there’s nothing you can do to make a guy care about you. If a guy really likes you, you won’t have to do anything but exist. He’ll love everything about you. He’ll do everything in his power to be in your presence and inhale your essence. The guy that really cares about you will want to experience life with you and create positive memories. He will want all of you, not just your body. The guy that loves you will not just be a guy, he will be a gentleman.
So next time a BOY texts you for a booty call, tell him no thanks. You’re a lady waiting on a GENTLEMAN...a gentleman in Christ.
“Who can find a virtuous woman? For her price is far above rubies. The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil.” Proverbs 31:10-11
As a female, young or old, you need to ask yourself if you’re a lady…a lady in Christ. If the answer is yes, you should realize how precious your body and spirit is. You see the body and spirit are connected. If you nurture one, you nurture the other. If you pollute one, you pollute the other. It’s important to protect both from harm that can last a lifetime. Some choices we make can chip away at our spirit. And if we continue to do them, one day we won’t have anything left.
As females, it’s natural for us to yearn for a guy’s attention and acceptance. But we should also be aware that promiscuity is not the way to get it. A guy will NEVER like or love you because of sex. In fact, there’s nothing you can do to make a guy care about you. If a guy really likes you, you won’t have to do anything but exist. He’ll love everything about you. He’ll do everything in his power to be in your presence and inhale your essence. The guy that really cares about you will want to experience life with you and create positive memories. He will want all of you, not just your body. The guy that loves you will not just be a guy, he will be a gentleman.
So next time a BOY texts you for a booty call, tell him no thanks. You’re a lady waiting on a GENTLEMAN...a gentleman in Christ.
“Who can find a virtuous woman? For her price is far above rubies. The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil.” Proverbs 31:10-11